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A proper rant, not one of thos pale imitations that seem to be more and more common here.
Read and learn:
Dark Age of Camelot.
An online-only game involving all manner of pixies, elves and other assorted folk from wizardworld.
Now, ordinarily I would ignore such nonsense and leave it to the pasty geeks that inhabit this female-less world of many sided dice and an unhealthy obsession with hairy-toed midgets desperate to "destroy a ring" (Subtext anyone? Jung?)
But I was persuaded by my boys that it was actually good, a cool game where loads of you could meet online and smash stuff up being a "berserker" (K Smith fans understand the appeal of that).
So I buy this game today from SR and get home to begin my exploration into the murky world of RPG games.
Except I discover that it requires a 15mb patch to even register the game.
And it's via auto-updater, which means I can't get it at work via ASDL and burn it onto CD.
No, I have to sit and wait whilst my 56k modem chugs through 15mb.
You can imagine the length of time that's going to take.
Except the server isn't working.
So not only can I not register and play this game, but I can't even log on to get help at the site, because you need to be a registered member.
And that's why I hate RPG games.
I tried to be part of it, I really did.
But it blows donkeys
Auto-updaters.
Why?
What is the point of that? To force you to download the new patch without giving you the option.
To prevent you playing until you've sat there for hours watching your modem trying to download mgs of info.
Rubbish.
But even if I could, what's the point?
Why be some bloody hobgoblin and level up so I can fight virgin woodpixies?
And I know that everyone else playing is one of *those* people.
You know the ones:
Those slightly over-weight, lank haired pasty nerds you see hunched over those stupid tables in Games Workshops, eating marmite sandwiches from He-Man lunchboxes that their mum's packed for them.
And it was their mums, because they don't have girlfriends.
Because they spend their life rolling 234 sided dice to decide which wizard is best at using the spell of halitosis.
And then they rush home to discuss whatever series of Star Trek is on Sky One that night, and complain because Captain Hymen used a warp-drive laser screwdriver when clearly that wouldn't have worked in the anti-grav field.
Or they download wallpapers of Valkyries standing prone over a tiger, clutching a big sword with eagles flying behind them.
And they put this poster right next to the one of the Ferarri or WWF Ladyboy with oily pants.
Christ I can't understand games involving wood minxes and the freakish loners that collect War Hammer lead figure and paint them, only to take them to Games Workshop the next Saturday and snigger because one of them "touched boob" when he was in the line for the latest Lord of The Rings spin-off collectors cards.
Bah.
THAT is a rant, not some lame whiny ponce about how tough school was.
Infuse real anger and disdain for others.
Lesson over.
Big stupid gay greasy overweight virgin troll-lovers.
Read and learn:
Dark Age of Camelot.
An online-only game involving all manner of pixies, elves and other assorted folk from wizardworld.
Now, ordinarily I would ignore such nonsense and leave it to the pasty geeks that inhabit this female-less world of many sided dice and an unhealthy obsession with hairy-toed midgets desperate to "destroy a ring" (Subtext anyone? Jung?)
But I was persuaded by my boys that it was actually good, a cool game where loads of you could meet online and smash stuff up being a "berserker" (K Smith fans understand the appeal of that).
So I buy this game today from SR and get home to begin my exploration into the murky world of RPG games.
Except I discover that it requires a 15mb patch to even register the game.
And it's via auto-updater, which means I can't get it at work via ASDL and burn it onto CD.
No, I have to sit and wait whilst my 56k modem chugs through 15mb.
You can imagine the length of time that's going to take.
Except the server isn't working.
So not only can I not register and play this game, but I can't even log on to get help at the site, because you need to be a registered member.
And that's why I hate RPG games.
I tried to be part of it, I really did.
But it blows donkeys
Auto-updaters.
Why?
What is the point of that? To force you to download the new patch without giving you the option.
To prevent you playing until you've sat there for hours watching your modem trying to download mgs of info.
Rubbish.
But even if I could, what's the point?
Why be some bloody hobgoblin and level up so I can fight virgin woodpixies?
And I know that everyone else playing is one of *those* people.
You know the ones:
Those slightly over-weight, lank haired pasty nerds you see hunched over those stupid tables in Games Workshops, eating marmite sandwiches from He-Man lunchboxes that their mum's packed for them.
And it was their mums, because they don't have girlfriends.
Because they spend their life rolling 234 sided dice to decide which wizard is best at using the spell of halitosis.
And then they rush home to discuss whatever series of Star Trek is on Sky One that night, and complain because Captain Hymen used a warp-drive laser screwdriver when clearly that wouldn't have worked in the anti-grav field.
Or they download wallpapers of Valkyries standing prone over a tiger, clutching a big sword with eagles flying behind them.
And they put this poster right next to the one of the Ferarri or WWF Ladyboy with oily pants.
Christ I can't understand games involving wood minxes and the freakish loners that collect War Hammer lead figure and paint them, only to take them to Games Workshop the next Saturday and snigger because one of them "touched boob" when he was in the line for the latest Lord of The Rings spin-off collectors cards.
Bah.
THAT is a rant, not some lame whiny ponce about how tough school was.
Infuse real anger and disdain for others.
Lesson over.
Big stupid gay greasy overweight virgin troll-lovers.
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That is a disgusting stereotype of anyone who likes Warhammer, Star Trek, RPG's and as for he-man lunchboxes, are you saying peoples Girl friends pack their lunchboxes...
It is a hobby, some people let their hobbies run their life which is a bit sad, when i was a WArhammer fan i just like rolling a few dices with my mates with a bottle of beer, i played the game when i was round a mates, it was actually quite fun and inquired a large ammount of intellegence... but that is besides the point... my hobby is computer games... does this make me a bad person? Do i not get girlfriends and go down the pub because i play MArio and Pokemon?
Never Stereotype or feel my wraith... although you can call me a Ninty if you like.
It is a hobby, some people let their hobbies run their life which is a bit sad, when i was a WArhammer fan i just like rolling a few dices with my mates with a bottle of beer, i played the game when i was round a mates, it was actually quite fun and inquired a large ammount of intellegence... but that is besides the point... my hobby is computer games... does this make me a bad person? Do i not get girlfriends and go down the pub because i play MArio and Pokemon?
Never Stereotype or feel my wraith... although you can call me a Ninty if you like.
Hercules! wrote:
> dont play one.
all that they are is going round collecting little gems, killing
> monsters and gaining special powers and stuff like that.
theyre all sad really
lol... hold on... havnt you just descibed the majority of computer games? .. erk! :)
> dont play one.
all that they are is going round collecting little gems, killing
> monsters and gaining special powers and stuff like that.
theyre all sad really
lol... hold on... havnt you just descibed the majority of computer games? .. erk! :)
Bah, RPGs eat poo (in a metaphorical sense.)
Hate them. Need more originality.
But...I am sort of looking forward to the LOTR games...
*runs*
Hate them. Need more originality.
But...I am sort of looking forward to the LOTR games...
*runs*
Excellent rant Goatboy. I also tried DAOC during its Beta testing which was nice and free... and it was crap compared to MIR.
Then, yesterday I thought I would try another two, RagnorakOnline a 381mb download didn't want to find the servers after installation so I bloody deleted that, then I tried MythofSoma, and its absolutely crap.
Luckily, MIR have said sorry for deleting my account by accident and also given me a couple of free periods, so I am currently hooked back into that.
Only really to bridge the gap until CityofHeros.
EVERYONE WHO OWNS A COMPUTER MUST GET THIS GAME ON SR.
www.cityofheros.com
I beleive it will rule. :) See you there. Its not a usual silly oldtime RPG. :)
http://www.geocities.com/fogteam/er-no.bmp
Then, yesterday I thought I would try another two, RagnorakOnline a 381mb download didn't want to find the servers after installation so I bloody deleted that, then I tried MythofSoma, and its absolutely crap.
Luckily, MIR have said sorry for deleting my account by accident and also given me a couple of free periods, so I am currently hooked back into that.
Only really to bridge the gap until CityofHeros.
EVERYONE WHO OWNS A COMPUTER MUST GET THIS GAME ON SR.
www.cityofheros.com
I beleive it will rule. :) See you there. Its not a usual silly oldtime RPG. :)
http://www.geocities.com/fogteam/er-no.bmp
I just shaved my pathetic goatee attempt off today...
Anyway, I enjoyed Ultima Online, until the 30 day free play wore off and they actually expected me to PAY for it!
It's currently gathering dust
Anyway, I enjoyed Ultima Online, until the 30 day free play wore off and they actually expected me to PAY for it!
It's currently gathering dust
Ahh beardy virgins,I have three come into ma shop they are the beardyest virgins you will ever see.
Today they had an arguement on how ICO on the PS2 is like Tomb Raider because its a third person view or something.
When they were on the Xbox they were playing DOA3(you know the bit where they jump off of the cliffs) they all in unison went "whoaaaaa" like they were falling with the chick.
They are your typical nerds too
They do console wars in tech talk
They argue about which Star Trek game is the best
They like RPGs
One has a beard
One has the greasyest hair EVER
EVER
They look like beardies and.....
Kagouls
yup.
Today they had an arguement on how ICO on the PS2 is like Tomb Raider because its a third person view or something.
When they were on the Xbox they were playing DOA3(you know the bit where they jump off of the cliffs) they all in unison went "whoaaaaa" like they were falling with the chick.
They are your typical nerds too
They do console wars in tech talk
They argue about which Star Trek game is the best
They like RPGs
One has a beard
One has the greasyest hair EVER
EVER
They look like beardies and.....
Kagouls
yup.
dont play one.
all that they are is going round collecting little gems, killing monsters and gaining special powers and stuff like that.
theyre all sad really
all that they are is going round collecting little gems, killing monsters and gaining special powers and stuff like that.
theyre all sad really
ooooh them geeks really do scare me.
Just think Goatboy what would you do if they popped out from behind a rock in a pink frilly dress chanting ''ooga booga whang flang I'm a star treky precky'
and you turn into a wand?
I've never really been interested in RPG's, I've never played a single one!
and I guess i never should.
Just think Goatboy what would you do if they popped out from behind a rock in a pink frilly dress chanting ''ooga booga whang flang I'm a star treky precky'
and you turn into a wand?
I've never really been interested in RPG's, I've never played a single one!
and I guess i never should.
"and - if such a thing is possible - facial dandruff"
i know someone who has that.
hahaha
"There should definitely be some kind of law banning beard growth in the under-21 age-group"
I also know someone who is 15 and has got a full proper goatee beard.
Not just stubble, A full grown goatee beard.
Isnt that freaky
i know someone who has that.
hahaha
"There should definitely be some kind of law banning beard growth in the under-21 age-group"
I also know someone who is 15 and has got a full proper goatee beard.
Not just stubble, A full grown goatee beard.
Isnt that freaky
The other thing about these beardy virgins is that, of all the people in the world, they are ones least qualified to grow a beard. It's always this horrible patchwork of greasy hairs, spots and - if such a thing is possible - facial dandruff. There should definitely be some kind of law banning beard growth in the under-21 age-group, and even then prospective beard growers should have to sign a contract promising not to clean their paintbrushes on it, or use it to store rations for further down the dungeon. Wake up, boys: you ain't a big swarthy dwarf, you're a loser with bum-fluff on your chin!
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