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"The Crystal Maze!!!!!!!!!!!!"

Remember the Crystal Maze? All ways on late on Channel 4. Every child loved it but it was on at about 10pm when we were young and then they moved it forward so everyone could watch it.

You had to love this program, whether it was Richard O'Briens maniac like appearance, and random screamings of "mmmmmmumsy" as he entered the medieval section, or the complex and warm appearance of the aztec area. The funniest thing was watching the fat people having to do balancing events or the nerdy people having to use strength and failing miserably and getting locked in. Another source of amusement is when they actually get the crystal and are on their way back when they accidentally drop it in some swamp or something and can't find it again.

This show was the Daddy, collecting the tokens in a giant wind filled crystal with the crazy O'brien shouting completely random encouragement at them, followed by laughter when they had a negative score, was more amusing (well maybe not) than watching the lovely melinda messenger prance around on the comparitavely crap Fort Boyard.

In terms of Areas: medieval and aztec quite clearly ruled. Futuristic was pretty crap and industrial was a laugh, especially the maze level.

In fact Crystal Maze was probably the best program on at the time, then it all went horribly wrong when O'Brien left and was replaced with the rather lame Ed Tudor Pole who didn't really stand a chance of replacing O'Brien as he might well have been sane, had a dodgy hair cut, and was about 6'5.

Anyway i think a crystal maze conversation is in order, main topics are best area, best level, O'Brien as a mad man, Ed tudor Pole poorest replacement ever?

Ah fond memories

It wasn't Roy Castle who presented it was it. No, the guy was much more dapper than Roy and owned no so-called passive smoking cancer blue hat, which made him look ill.

*A Women enters the cage, looks at sign that says "Be bullish and push the button to release the crystal", she looks at the Green button, the Red button and the Blue button*

*with a minute to go she panics and runs out*

*everyone is gutted, she apologises then expects to be used in another challenge, looking morose when not choosen again*

*she only collects 3 silver tokens in the end game and they miss out on he prize by two gold tokens*

Pfff, equality is all well and good but the lads were banking on that weekend away, lawnmower racing...

Remember the big reverse hoover thing the 'stood' in?


Great topic Ashley.

Every weekday I go passed a house on my bus. And that isn't even the good part...In the garden of this house is The Crystal Maze (The big Crystal at the end with the money and the wind and the grabbing). Or a green hows that looks just like it. Either way it's pretty cool.

...and I can't spell house, that's great.

They could have used the Millenium dome as a giant crystal maze, which immigrants grasp at £50 notes for as long as their permits allowed. This would obviously be paid for by the tax payers who do all the work for little reward in this country and then we could pay for it again in TV licenses when they make it into a five hour show hosted by Smilie, Volderman and Paul Ross, on the BBC.

Then a follow up programme would be the Crystal Palace where we look at the lovely homes that the contestants have bought (with Goverment subsidy as well) with their winnings.

I really am in a stinker.

I no longer making the sense I go to gym and take anger out on weights...

mmmmm sweaty lycra.

actually i take it back. The funniest thing is when the really crap person on the team gets locked in right at the beginning and everyone pretends to be dissappointed. Then they just leave them there until some woman goes "we should buy them out", you see the look of absolute horror on the rest of the teams face and the worst thing is that the idiot who suggested buying them out is the captain and is only letting her out cos she wants to makesure her friend hasn't chipped a nail. Then the person they let out gets lock in again and they have lost a crystal.

i still watch it on challenge tv a bit on sky. i think the bald man was funny because he used to always play the harmonica and it always annoying the contestants!

That tv show was class. The futuristic zone was the best i reckon, there was usually a challenge involving laserbeams there. Aztec was pretty good as well, usually consisting of shimmying along a stick of bamboo above a lot of water.