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"Oh My God"

For those of you who didn’t speak to me last night, I broke up with my girlfriend and turned to cheap cider and beer for the evening. It turns out the two don’t mix well. I cannot remember a thing after about 8 O’clock, so here is my little, entirely true, story.

I woke up this afternoon (about 25 minutes ago) with my mouth tasting like a combination of an ashtray and a urinal. My head feels like someone ripped it off and played 17 games of basketball with it and my arms and legs are entirely numb.

I somehow managed to drag myself into the shower, I then fell out of it and happened to be wet and naked on the floor when the lady who lived next door came round to ‘see our new bathroom’. She seemed chuffed with herself but I had to grab a towel and sprint for my bedroom.

I thought I would try and relax a bit until the ‘still drunk but not in a good way’ feeling wore off. I turned on the TV, saw Sophie Ellis Bextor, then turned it off and went to the CD player instead. I was about to drown out all noises within a 6 mile radius with my Nickelback album, when my phone stopped me.

It was my ex girlfriend saying how sorry she was and how she wanted to make it up to me. Too tired and still a bit drunk to argue otherwise I told her that, “We would still be friends and stuff.” So she happily hung up.

I turned around and was about to hit ‘play’ on my stereo when my phone rang again. It was another girl who I apparently ‘spent half the night with’, however I don’t recall anything. She was telling me ‘how good we are together and that she is so glad we are together now’. I literally dropped the phone (been the melodramatic idiot I am) and told her I would call her back in a minute.

Too stunned to play by CD now, I went to get something to eat (fully clothed at this point), I then got a text message from yet another girl saying how I had been on the phone telling her I loved her. I thought about dropping the phone dramatically again but the kitchen floor is stone, so I didn’t.

I ate my soggy cornflakes and decided to put my ordeal into words and see what a drunken klutz I truly am. I have no idea how I am going to sort this all out and I don’t remember the majority of my night, I have been told I arrived home at 3AM though.

The moral of this story? Everything in moderation. I don’t think I will be drinking as much this Christmas somehow.

I hope you all have a fantastic Christmas and enjoy the time off school/work/dole
Take care and have fun with your loved ones.

-kyz²²-

Kyz22 wrote:
> hehe, anyone else have any alcohol fueled tales?

So so many..

One night wandered home to a mates house drunk, very drunk.
One way there we were carryoing on and trying to shove each other over a church garden hedge. My two mates both fell over and lay on the grass. I went back to his and went to sleep.
They woke me up at 7ish to say that two grannies on the way to sunday morning mass had to wake them up after they spent the night sleeping in the garden.


On another night we were walking from pub to pub. People began to flash the cameras that check for trouble.
Out of the blue this voice said "You there, pull up your pants"
Someone I was with started shouting "God is that you?"
We thought they were having a laugh but they really believed it was God. Seems the cameras now have speakers and the people watching them can communicate with you.

If I had that job I would scare the hell out of drunks night after night.

Other events have been things like Mates getting off with twin sisters, mate getting of with a girl then going home with her and getting it on with the mother in the morning. She was a minger, how he suffered after that one.

Usually have fights in the 24hr supermarket with breadsticks or roll melons down the aisle, tried one weekend to lock someone in the trolley lockers but security asked us to leave.

Ah memories. Hopefully get more tonight. merry christmas all. :-)

I drunk too much in a tent and threw up just outside. I woke up with my friend screaming, she had stood in it. heh

Cyclone wrote:

> My freind (god forbid it happening ever again) ran around naked.
>
> And pis*ed on another tent.
>
> And then I ran around the field.

-------

LOL

Got drunk in a tent.

Decided to do Doctor Evil impressions to all and sundry nearby.

My freind (god forbid it happening ever again) ran around naked.

And pis*ed on another tent.

And then I ran around the field.

Hur hur.

its a regular wednesday for me, alcohol and all.

tomoro, im gonna get a bit pi*sed, awww well its christmas.

morbo wrote:
> umm, got drunk and pulled mooney at girls house. the old man didnt
> like the big site so he chased me and the pals away with a... stick of
> some sort.
>
> anyway you story seems fermilior to me. i do it every saturday.

Me too, the drinking thing, but I dont normally forget everything.

umm, got drunk and pulled mooney at girls house. the old man didnt like the big site so he chased me and the pals away with a... stick of some sort.

anyway you story seems fermilior to me. i do it every saturday.

hehe, anyone else have any alcohol fueled tales?

Hehe.