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Now I know how much you all hate Fanboy’s. They either love the Playstation 2, Xbox or GameCube and think as themselves as the most dedicated person towards either Sony, Microsoft or Nintendo. They then turn up at the forums here at Special Reserve, choose a place to spread the word of their chosen console and then preach endlessly. Think of them as the Jehovah witnesses of the online world, the type that knock on your door every Sunday and once you think they’ve gone they always return at some point. They are the unflushables which will never go away no matter how many times they’ve been banned. They are a breed called the Fanboy.
In the past week the forums have seen a massive increase in popularity. Just take a look at the number in the brackets, at the moment its on 2257 and it’s steady. I’m normally used to seeing a figure in the mid-thousand’s. Along with the sudden increase in posts have come some quality posters who will become worthy additions to the forums, but with the quality also comes the Fanboys. Lately this has become a regular thing, causing a lot of comedy because of the idiots they are.
Many ways have been suggested to rid the forums of the Fanboy’s (I just typed that Fannyboys by accident), but how many of them will work? None.
So what’s the answer? Well I have it and although it may seem a little harsh at first you’ll soon realise it’s all a little joke – Execution.
That’s right, I am the master of Execution. So here is some simple ways to get rid of the Fanboys, minimum fuss but maximum mess.
(The following may not be suitable for Kids or Fanboys. Just a little warning.)
Hanging
Once being known of being a Fanboy the person at hand will be tied up with their hands behind their back. Once this has been done they shall be put on a cart and driven by horse slowly through the crowd of angry forum members. As this is done all that can be heard are chants like “Gutted!” and “HAHAHA!”. As these chants are shouted random games, instead of mouldy fruit, are thrown onto the Fanboy who is kneeling down with his head still high in pride. The games thrown at will are stuff like Mario, Sonic and all the other stuff Fanboys hate. Once they get thrown the Fanboy starts to cry as he can’t take being surrounded by decent games, at one point a rival console to his own may be thrown at this point suicide may occur. Once his neck has been tied to the rope he is left dangling in the air struggling to say “GC iz 4 da kiddies.”
Electric Chair
A much more frightening type of death for the Fanboy. The Fanboy is brought out, put in a chair and strapped down and then a lever is pushed so a rush of electricity is put through the chair. As the Fanboy shakes to his death he screams “PS2 TILL I DIE” and then he does die.
Lethal Injection
Done in private and a less brutal way of death is the Lethal Injection. The Fanboy is brought out and a qualified Doctor is in a room with him. Here the Fanboy puts out his arm and a lethal dose of medicine is put through his arm via an injection. Before this is done the Fanboy is asked if he has any final words, normally it is something like “PS2 Rulez!”
The Guillotine
The ultimate execution method, a machine which was designed for instant death. A Fanboy is brought up to the Guillotine and is made to rest his head in the provided slot. It is then secured there by a piece of wood and a rope is let go so that a sharp blade falls down and cuts through the neck detaching the head from the body. After the head has been detached it may still live for a few more seconds and is able to move and sometimes speak. This is because blood is still available in that region and so words like “Microsoft will rule over all!” are likely to be muttered.
So there you go, just kill them.
Or you can just ban them…
In the past week the forums have seen a massive increase in popularity. Just take a look at the number in the brackets, at the moment its on 2257 and it’s steady. I’m normally used to seeing a figure in the mid-thousand’s. Along with the sudden increase in posts have come some quality posters who will become worthy additions to the forums, but with the quality also comes the Fanboys. Lately this has become a regular thing, causing a lot of comedy because of the idiots they are.
Many ways have been suggested to rid the forums of the Fanboy’s (I just typed that Fannyboys by accident), but how many of them will work? None.
So what’s the answer? Well I have it and although it may seem a little harsh at first you’ll soon realise it’s all a little joke – Execution.
That’s right, I am the master of Execution. So here is some simple ways to get rid of the Fanboys, minimum fuss but maximum mess.
(The following may not be suitable for Kids or Fanboys. Just a little warning.)
Hanging
Once being known of being a Fanboy the person at hand will be tied up with their hands behind their back. Once this has been done they shall be put on a cart and driven by horse slowly through the crowd of angry forum members. As this is done all that can be heard are chants like “Gutted!” and “HAHAHA!”. As these chants are shouted random games, instead of mouldy fruit, are thrown onto the Fanboy who is kneeling down with his head still high in pride. The games thrown at will are stuff like Mario, Sonic and all the other stuff Fanboys hate. Once they get thrown the Fanboy starts to cry as he can’t take being surrounded by decent games, at one point a rival console to his own may be thrown at this point suicide may occur. Once his neck has been tied to the rope he is left dangling in the air struggling to say “GC iz 4 da kiddies.”
Electric Chair
A much more frightening type of death for the Fanboy. The Fanboy is brought out, put in a chair and strapped down and then a lever is pushed so a rush of electricity is put through the chair. As the Fanboy shakes to his death he screams “PS2 TILL I DIE” and then he does die.
Lethal Injection
Done in private and a less brutal way of death is the Lethal Injection. The Fanboy is brought out and a qualified Doctor is in a room with him. Here the Fanboy puts out his arm and a lethal dose of medicine is put through his arm via an injection. Before this is done the Fanboy is asked if he has any final words, normally it is something like “PS2 Rulez!”
The Guillotine
The ultimate execution method, a machine which was designed for instant death. A Fanboy is brought up to the Guillotine and is made to rest his head in the provided slot. It is then secured there by a piece of wood and a rope is let go so that a sharp blade falls down and cuts through the neck detaching the head from the body. After the head has been detached it may still live for a few more seconds and is able to move and sometimes speak. This is because blood is still available in that region and so words like “Microsoft will rule over all!” are likely to be muttered.
So there you go, just kill them.
Or you can just ban them…
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Hey, Rock. Are you interested in swapping your game then, as I noticed that you added me to your MSN, but you appear offline. I'll be on for another half hour I would say, and if you are ready for a swap, i have everything ready to post tomorrow,
*in a sudden urge to immitate David Brent*
It's your own decision
*eats chicken*
*in a sudden urge to immitate David Brent*
It's your own decision
*eats chicken*
Nope, we left school and he left full time education for good and went straight on to work. Meaning he matured and all that.
He still has my Super Smash Bros on the N64 actually, I should go and get it back from him. I remember the time me and Robin (badgermaniac) went round to get back Rob's White Pony CD which Tom had. We planned it all. Got off the Bus, knocked on the door and Tom was suppose to anwser it but he was playing Football. Rob was gonna hold him down as I went upstairs in the hunt for the CD. Then we were going to calmly leave like nothing happened.
But his Mum anwsered and so we just went upstairs. His little Sister was playing The Sims and we told her "You saw nothing" as we threw around all his CD's (bloody loads in his room, scattered everywhere). He eventually found it...case smashed and so we threatened to spit in his sock which was hanging on the side of the bannister.
In the end Rob was outraged and smashed up Tom's favourite CD case with the end of his guitar and Tom's little Sister told him we had bcome in for operation Get Back The CD.
Hmmmmm
He still has my Super Smash Bros on the N64 actually, I should go and get it back from him. I remember the time me and Robin (badgermaniac) went round to get back Rob's White Pony CD which Tom had. We planned it all. Got off the Bus, knocked on the door and Tom was suppose to anwser it but he was playing Football. Rob was gonna hold him down as I went upstairs in the hunt for the CD. Then we were going to calmly leave like nothing happened.
But his Mum anwsered and so we just went upstairs. His little Sister was playing The Sims and we told her "You saw nothing" as we threw around all his CD's (bloody loads in his room, scattered everywhere). He eventually found it...case smashed and so we threatened to spit in his sock which was hanging on the side of the bannister.
In the end Rob was outraged and smashed up Tom's favourite CD case with the end of his guitar and Tom's little Sister told him we had bcome in for operation Get Back The CD.
Hmmmmm
Monkey_With_Attitude wrote:
> A friend I use to have use to try EVERYTHING to be different.
So what changed him? Peer pressure?
> A friend I use to have use to try EVERYTHING to be different.
So what changed him? Peer pressure?
A friend I use to have use to try EVERYTHING to be different.
He would take a liking in things other people wouldn't. At one time he wanted a Slot Machine in his room and would always go down the arcades and gamble on the slots.
He liked the guillotine as well for some reason. Done research on it and would always talk about it and say it in a strange way. Weird.
He also liked looking for new bands and stuff, influenced me there.
He liked other wierd stuff as well forgot what they were though.
He would take a liking in things other people wouldn't. At one time he wanted a Slot Machine in his room and would always go down the arcades and gamble on the slots.
He liked the guillotine as well for some reason. Done research on it and would always talk about it and say it in a strange way. Weird.
He also liked looking for new bands and stuff, influenced me there.
He liked other wierd stuff as well forgot what they were though.
Heh, I remember somehow getting onto the topic of the guillotine and when I told my Mum about the thing where the head is still 'alive' for a few seconds after being decapitated, my Mum got all squemish and insisted I was lying then said that the guillotine was disgusting...
im que va a batirle para arriba y a quitar sus piernas y a pegar su sangre en la pared.
Hola mi nombre es Harry. Vivo en España. Es caliente aquí en el momento. He estado jugando Rayman 3 pero no a seguro sobre el nivel pasado. Por favor si usted puede ayudarme sería apreciado
im a fanboy, whatcha gonna do ?
yep send there the chopped up body via post.
Oh I forgot to put it in but all of the Fanboys executewd left their will to the company who made their favourite games console.
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