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"Going out tonight?"

I'm going to an after wedding party where I plan to drink my own weight in the finest lager they have to offer. This week I hope to avoid finishing the evening talking to god on the big white telephone (slumped around the toilet bowl)

So what are you doing ?

Herc, are you from Manchester?

the time has come to consider lagers :

Stella - I love it but excessive consumption usually means large gaps in memory and minor bodily injuries the next day

fosters - My old pal the amber nectar. great for all occasions, but is becoming bland

Grolsch - quality. has some of the same qualities as stella, i have my suspicions they are one and the same

miller - like fosters only slightly weaker. tastes great, gets you wrecked. does the job

budweiser - king of beers for a good reason. has everything - tastes great, reassuringly strong and goes down like water.

harp - a refreshing alternative, no special qualities

carling - not my cup of tea - gash

labatts - tastes good, but you'd get more p*ssed drinking iron brew.

bud ice - budweiser with a smoother flavour - I'm in heaven

fosters ice - fosters with a smoother flavour - pretty damn good

can't think of any more that are worth a mention ...

Hercules! wrote:
> Ok then, *you* phone her.
>
> The number is...

[email protected]

I can find your real name out easy enough, and that's all I need to know to start demanding information.

Borat Sagdiyev wrote:

> services such as what?

----

Err... *cough* 'clean my shoes' *cough* yeah...

BEARDS. wrote:
> Wimp.

----

Ok then, *you* phone her.

The number is...

Hercules! wrote:
> and hope they apologies and give me free
> services.

services such as what?

Borat Sagdiyev wrote:
> don't you know any nice young laydeez you can play rugby with ?

-----

I'll take some girls down but theyre all probably out or something.

I think i'll watch the match on TV and then go out tomorrow or whatever.

Wimp.

you know the type, muscles instead of breasts, short hair, chins like desperate dans, most probably called helga or something

Heh heh.

Some lads are going aswell, one of her mates boyfriends. Tsk tsk. I'll feel all wrecked when I go in on Monday if I phoned them and asked why I wasnt invited.

I'll just say when they come up to me in school "Why wasnt I invited eh eh eh?" and hope they apologies and give me free services.