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"So I'm into a situation that us guys hope not to be..."

*Sigh* You may but probably don't remember a post of mine a few months ago in the Life forum about this girl I liked and thought liked me too. Well she does (High five and so on...) and yeah we hang out, been to London to see a band and cinema to see Matrix together etc and her and her bestest friend are now part of my friendship group meaning they get drunk with us so stuff obviously happens there (High Five and so on...). We've been talking about how we need to talk about "us" and our "situation" and one of the points that has come up on her side is "we're really good friends and we have to decide if it's going to work and will be worth the risk". Friends. Good friends no less, that's even worse. So now we're stuck in this stage.

I'm pretty sure we could have something great together and think I am willing to take this risk. Sure if things go bad stuff will change which will suck 'cause things are quite nice right now, but we could miss out on something good. If it was just that as the problem, blamo, I could sort it out. But no, there's more. Her bestest buddy is amazingly close to her, I mean they're together pretty much always so it's mighty hard to spend time with just her without a tag-a-long. I can see this being a majour complication if we do decide to get together.

Meh I dunno. I guess I just need to talk to her about it, just need her mate to p*ss off for a bit so I can do so.

gerrid wrote:
> When people say it they never really mean it, because, as Wookie said,
> it doesn't actually make sense.
> It's just what people when they don't fancy their friend and don't
> want to hurt their feelings.

Yep. I don't see how going out with someone can end a friendship? Most can end a relationship sensibly, if at all...It's all bollards.

CDouch wrote:
> SHEEPY wrote:
> Give her a night of hot passion
>
> The girl or her friend?
>
> ...Or both?

:D

Tell her that she shouldn't let her ex ruin her life.

But she does, she also once said she "couldn't live without me". It's just she had quite a bad break up with her ex and now can't even stand the thought of him and doesn't want that to happen to us.

It's a subtle way of saying "you're ugly, i'd sooner make love to Lisa Riley than get with you"

When people say it they never really mean it, because, as Wookie said, it doesn't actually make sense.
It's just what people when they don't fancy their friend and don't want to hurt their feelings.

Go on...

except that the "let's not ruin our friendship" thing is just an excuse.

That's a mighty fine point.

I don't understand all this "we're good friends, why risk spoiling it" nonsense, personally.

A good friendship is an ideal basis for a relationship, in my personal opinion. I wouldn't want to be in a relationship with someone who I wasn't good friends with. And if your friendship is THAT good, it would most likely survive even if a relationship didn't.

Look at it this way: would you want to be in a relationship with someone who you WEREN'T friends with?

Exactly.

So if you hold off of relationships because you don't want to 'spoil' a friendship, you'll never have a relationship.