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We've all seen these muppets if you play online games, with [22414] Donkey or something so that you tremble in fear at them.
"Elite Clan" strokers that think and act like it's not a game but life itself. Strangely with a disproportionately high number of Germans.
Makes the game hard or frustrating when they all go on one side and proceed to wipe the floor, time after time after time and all congratulate each other and chant inane insults at newbies that don't really care.
So when I got Operation Flashpoint, I decided to start my own clan, for people fed up with those militia-morons that probably sit at home in combat gear and read Soldier of Fortune.
I stuck a message on the Codemaster Forums asking for light-hearted players that just wanted a game, didn't think it was real and couldn't be bothered with rules and regs.
Some clans I've seen are arranged like a real army.
Commanders, Lieutenants, one even has a "Special Ops" unit. For a computer game.
And the strangest thing happened in response to my plea.
I was inundated with responses from people sick to death of these clan-monkeys thinking they owned the servers.
We chose a name to reflect our not-entirely-serious attitude and got a website running.
As of today, The UK Dentists have almost 30 members.
Some have broadband access and host maps, others have designed the website that looks amazing, we have people that create maps and missions and we play on our own server for fun.
And the thing that really, really surprised me?
As well as people sick of Clans, we have the moderators and owner of the Official Codemaster forum as members, 2 guys from Codemasters and 3 people from Bohemia Interactive - the guys that made the game.
All UK Dentists and play for fun.
And we all suck. Even the guys that made the game can't be bothered to play it like it's real, we just get in tractors and run each other over, bail out of helicopters and have a fantastic time playing.
Come check us out:
www.ukd.org.uk
;)
Nice site you have there.
30 idiots in tractors charging about screaming "We Ownz J00"
Phear us, for we know not what we do
A once good idea to indentify your friend has now been turned into somehting way out of proportion. with clans spreading over all online games it is getting more annoying by the day.
SO I won't be joining a wide scale clan.
T_W (:)
He has nothing to lose and they have everything!
They kill him and he just comes back to life.
If he kills them then their pride is mashed.
What started as a great idea seems to have gone the way of most clan mentalities i.e. imposing structure, (the 'creed'), reducing freedom within the game for members, ('no, you can't play seriously') and implementing controls on its members ('what do you mean "military tactics"?').
I hate ALL clans, even ones that I was a member of (I'm currently in the process of wiping out my own galaxy in Planetarion and throughly enjoying it).
From now on I am a FREE MAN. I will play games as I see fit, not how others think I should be playing them. And I make it my mission in online gaming to seek out and destroy my primary targets: Clan Members.
I don't think I'm gonna last long, but I'm sure going to have some fun trying :-)
You must swear to uphold the following creed:
As a dentist I promise to:
1.Be in the wrong place at the wrong time.
2.Never knowingly support my comrades.
3.Consistently look in the wrong direction at the lovely scenery.
4.Get tremendously scared when the enemy approaches and nervously look at my team-mates whilst accidentally letting go a few rounds.
5.Start typing some nonsense in the middle of a fire fight and get myself and a few weak-minded team-mates killed in the process.
6.Crash a vehicle and kill half my squad then blame someone else.
7.Stand up and run around shooting, whilst we're sneaking up on the enemy.
8.Salute a tree at the start of the game
That should help you gauge the level of dedication within the squad. Are you afraid now............you should be we were born to rule OPF with our unusual playing style.