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> If Operating Systems Ran The Airlines...
>
> UNIX Airways
>
> Everyone brings one piece of the plane along when they come to the
> airport.
> They all go out on the runway and put the plane together piece by piece,
> arguing non-stop about what kind of plane they are supposed to be
> building.
>
> Air DOS
>
> Everybody pushes the airplane until it glides, then they jump on and let
> the
> plane coast until it hits the ground again. Then they push again, jump on
> again, and so on...
>
> Mac Airlines
>
> All the stewards, captains, baggage handlers, and ticket agents look and
> act
> exactly the same. Every time you ask questions about details, you are
> gently
> but firmly told that you don't need to know, don't want to know, and
> everything will be done for you without your ever having to know, so just
> shut up.
>
> Windows Air
>
> The terminal is pretty and colorful, with friendly stewards, easy baggage
> check and boarding, and a smooth take-off. After about 10 minutes in the
> air, the plane explodes with no warning whatsoever.
>
> Windows NT Air
>
> Just like Windows Air, but costs more, uses much bigger planes, and takes
> out all the other aircraft within a 40-mile radius when it explodes.
>
> Linux Air
>
> Disgruntled employees of all the other OS airlines decide to start their
> own
> airline. They build the planes, ticket counters, and pave the runways
> themselves. They charge a small fee to cover the cost of printing the
> ticket, but you can also download and print the ticket yourself.
>
> When you board the plane, you are given a seat, four bolts, a wrench and a
> copy of the seat-HOWTO.html. Once settled, the fully adjustable seat is
> very
> comfortable, the plane leaves and arrives on time without a single
> problem,
> the in-flight meal is wonderful. You try to tell customers of the other
> airlines about the great trip, but all they can say is, "You had to do
> what
> with the seat?"
>
>
> UNIX Airways
>
> Everyone brings one piece of the plane along when they come to the
> airport.
> They all go out on the runway and put the plane together piece by piece,
> arguing non-stop about what kind of plane they are supposed to be
> building.
>
> Air DOS
>
> Everybody pushes the airplane until it glides, then they jump on and let
> the
> plane coast until it hits the ground again. Then they push again, jump on
> again, and so on...
>
> Mac Airlines
>
> All the stewards, captains, baggage handlers, and ticket agents look and
> act
> exactly the same. Every time you ask questions about details, you are
> gently
> but firmly told that you don't need to know, don't want to know, and
> everything will be done for you without your ever having to know, so just
> shut up.
>
> Windows Air
>
> The terminal is pretty and colorful, with friendly stewards, easy baggage
> check and boarding, and a smooth take-off. After about 10 minutes in the
> air, the plane explodes with no warning whatsoever.
>
> Windows NT Air
>
> Just like Windows Air, but costs more, uses much bigger planes, and takes
> out all the other aircraft within a 40-mile radius when it explodes.
>
> Linux Air
>
> Disgruntled employees of all the other OS airlines decide to start their
> own
> airline. They build the planes, ticket counters, and pave the runways
> themselves. They charge a small fee to cover the cost of printing the
> ticket, but you can also download and print the ticket yourself.
>
> When you board the plane, you are given a seat, four bolts, a wrench and a
> copy of the seat-HOWTO.html. Once settled, the fully adjustable seat is
> very
> comfortable, the plane leaves and arrives on time without a single
> problem,
> the in-flight meal is wonderful. You try to tell customers of the other
> airlines about the great trip, but all they can say is, "You had to do
> what
> with the seat?"
>
Page:
Dogfather, you are a fool.
How boring.
Ok as you asked so nicely I'll give you a sneak peak at my e-mail.
Dear ***** ******,
Thank you for shopping with Special Reserve. We are pleased to confirm
your order as below:
FREE TOMB RAIDER FOR P... x1 Free Gift £0.00
SPECIAL RESERVE 1 YEAR... x1 UK £7.50
OPERATION FLASHPOINT: ... x1 PC Game £25.59 (inc £0.60 P+P)
The total price charged to your credit card is £33.09 (UK Pounds) and the
order is subject to credit card authorisation.
We will endeavour to despatch the goods as quickly as possible. If you
have ordered a game in advance of the release date then we will attempt to
deliver it to you on the actual release date. Release dates may be subject
to slippage.
The cardholders address is as follows:
* ***** ******
******
**** **.*******
*** ****
UNITED KINGDOM
The delivery address is as follows:
* ***** ******
******
**** **.*******
*** ****
If you have any query relating to this order please use our on-line order
tracking service. The link below will show the status of your order from
now until despatch.
Alternatively, if you'd prefer to speak to a member of our team, please
contact Special Reserve Customer Service on 0870 725 9999 and quote the
Internet order reference: **********. Please make a note of this
transaction number - it will be needed for all enquiries.
For your records, your membership number is: ******
A despatch confirmation will be sent via e-mail (to this e-mail address)
when your items leave our warehouse. Confirmations are *not* sent for
memberships, free gifts or domain names.
Overseas orders are subject to address verification which could take
several days for some countries.
Items are often sent individually packaged and may therefore arrive on
different days. A VAT receipt will be included with the goods, together
with a Reddy Rewards Voucher for each item ordered. Members can save just
five Reddies to exchange for one of the FREE GIFTS shown at this page:
http://1free.co.uk
Please bookmark http://UKgames.com or make it your home page to keep up to
date with news and special offers. UKgames.com is the address of the main
Special Reserve site with reviews, cheats, video clips, competitions and
more! For a site map of the entire network, please visit:
http://specialreserve.net/sitemap
Special Reserve is the market leader in mail order home computing and the
biggest games club in the World. We hope you will find it enjoyable to
shop with us and thank you again for your order. Your comments are welcome
to [email protected]
Dear ***** ******,
Thank you for shopping with Special Reserve. We are pleased to confirm
your order as below:
FREE TOMB RAIDER FOR P... x1 Free Gift £0.00
SPECIAL RESERVE 1 YEAR... x1 UK £7.50
OPERATION FLASHPOINT: ... x1 PC Game £25.59 (inc £0.60 P+P)
The total price charged to your credit card is £33.09 (UK Pounds) and the
order is subject to credit card authorisation.
We will endeavour to despatch the goods as quickly as possible. If you
have ordered a game in advance of the release date then we will attempt to
deliver it to you on the actual release date. Release dates may be subject
to slippage.
The cardholders address is as follows:
* ***** ******
******
**** **.*******
*** ****
UNITED KINGDOM
The delivery address is as follows:
* ***** ******
******
**** **.*******
*** ****
If you have any query relating to this order please use our on-line order
tracking service. The link below will show the status of your order from
now until despatch.
Alternatively, if you'd prefer to speak to a member of our team, please
contact Special Reserve Customer Service on 0870 725 9999 and quote the
Internet order reference: **********. Please make a note of this
transaction number - it will be needed for all enquiries.
For your records, your membership number is: ******
A despatch confirmation will be sent via e-mail (to this e-mail address)
when your items leave our warehouse. Confirmations are *not* sent for
memberships, free gifts or domain names.
Overseas orders are subject to address verification which could take
several days for some countries.
Items are often sent individually packaged and may therefore arrive on
different days. A VAT receipt will be included with the goods, together
with a Reddy Rewards Voucher for each item ordered. Members can save just
five Reddies to exchange for one of the FREE GIFTS shown at this page:
http://1free.co.uk
Please bookmark http://UKgames.com or make it your home page to keep up to
date with news and special offers. UKgames.com is the address of the main
Special Reserve site with reviews, cheats, video clips, competitions and
more! For a site map of the entire network, please visit:
http://specialreserve.net/sitemap
Special Reserve is the market leader in mail order home computing and the
biggest games club in the World. We hope you will find it enjoyable to
shop with us and thank you again for your order. Your comments are welcome
to [email protected]
I think the best bit is Windows NT.
I laughed at the Windows bit.
Shut up Dogfather.
I thought it was quite funny :-D The Linux thing is soooooo true!
I thought it was quite funny :-D The Linux thing is soooooo true!
I though it was mildly amusing, and wanted to share it with everyone.
I would like to read your emails actually, can you post them here? Thanks.
Fool.
I would like to read your emails actually, can you post them here? Thanks.
Fool.
The Dogfather wrote:
> And what is your point to this e-mail? I don't print all of my
> e-mail into chat rooms.
*Whhhhhooooooossshhhhh*
> And what is your point to this e-mail? I don't print all of my
> e-mail into chat rooms.
*Whhhhhooooooossshhhhh*
And what is your point to this e-mail? I don't print all of my e-mail into chat rooms.
> If Operating Systems Ran The Airlines...
>
> UNIX Airways
>
> Everyone brings one piece of the plane along when they come to the
> airport.
> They all go out on the runway and put the plane together piece by piece,
> arguing non-stop about what kind of plane they are supposed to be
> building.
>
> Air DOS
>
> Everybody pushes the airplane until it glides, then they jump on and let
> the
> plane coast until it hits the ground again. Then they push again, jump on
> again, and so on...
>
> Mac Airlines
>
> All the stewards, captains, baggage handlers, and ticket agents look and
> act
> exactly the same. Every time you ask questions about details, you are
> gently
> but firmly told that you don't need to know, don't want to know, and
> everything will be done for you without your ever having to know, so just
> shut up.
>
> Windows Air
>
> The terminal is pretty and colorful, with friendly stewards, easy baggage
> check and boarding, and a smooth take-off. After about 10 minutes in the
> air, the plane explodes with no warning whatsoever.
>
> Windows NT Air
>
> Just like Windows Air, but costs more, uses much bigger planes, and takes
> out all the other aircraft within a 40-mile radius when it explodes.
>
> Linux Air
>
> Disgruntled employees of all the other OS airlines decide to start their
> own
> airline. They build the planes, ticket counters, and pave the runways
> themselves. They charge a small fee to cover the cost of printing the
> ticket, but you can also download and print the ticket yourself.
>
> When you board the plane, you are given a seat, four bolts, a wrench and a
> copy of the seat-HOWTO.html. Once settled, the fully adjustable seat is
> very
> comfortable, the plane leaves and arrives on time without a single
> problem,
> the in-flight meal is wonderful. You try to tell customers of the other
> airlines about the great trip, but all they can say is, "You had to do
> what
> with the seat?"
>
>
> UNIX Airways
>
> Everyone brings one piece of the plane along when they come to the
> airport.
> They all go out on the runway and put the plane together piece by piece,
> arguing non-stop about what kind of plane they are supposed to be
> building.
>
> Air DOS
>
> Everybody pushes the airplane until it glides, then they jump on and let
> the
> plane coast until it hits the ground again. Then they push again, jump on
> again, and so on...
>
> Mac Airlines
>
> All the stewards, captains, baggage handlers, and ticket agents look and
> act
> exactly the same. Every time you ask questions about details, you are
> gently
> but firmly told that you don't need to know, don't want to know, and
> everything will be done for you without your ever having to know, so just
> shut up.
>
> Windows Air
>
> The terminal is pretty and colorful, with friendly stewards, easy baggage
> check and boarding, and a smooth take-off. After about 10 minutes in the
> air, the plane explodes with no warning whatsoever.
>
> Windows NT Air
>
> Just like Windows Air, but costs more, uses much bigger planes, and takes
> out all the other aircraft within a 40-mile radius when it explodes.
>
> Linux Air
>
> Disgruntled employees of all the other OS airlines decide to start their
> own
> airline. They build the planes, ticket counters, and pave the runways
> themselves. They charge a small fee to cover the cost of printing the
> ticket, but you can also download and print the ticket yourself.
>
> When you board the plane, you are given a seat, four bolts, a wrench and a
> copy of the seat-HOWTO.html. Once settled, the fully adjustable seat is
> very
> comfortable, the plane leaves and arrives on time without a single
> problem,
> the in-flight meal is wonderful. You try to tell customers of the other
> airlines about the great trip, but all they can say is, "You had to do
> what
> with the seat?"
>
Page: