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Ok, since Cooldogs posted his experiences of being bullied, it keeps cropping up time and time again.
Wookie offered his thoughts on the subject, and I want to try and say something about it.
Here goes:
I can say with hand on heart that my schooldays were the most miserable and hated times of my life that I can remember.
Why?
Bullies.
Made my life hell from 12-16 until I left to go to College.
I was small for my age, wore glasses, read a lot and was quiet. In school, this marks you out as a target for others. You’re “weak” or “gay”, and it’s open season on the little kid.
There was a gang of about 6 kids, some my age, some in the year below me that made it their mission in life to harass, taunt, smack and generally abuse on a daily basis.
The train on the way to school, waiting for lessons, walking to the station after school, the train ride home and on the bus until I got off at my stop.
Why?
Because I was quiet, didn’t like sports, never said anything back and just wanted to get on with school and learn stuff. I loved that part of school, learning stuff I didn’t know, I did my homework, paid attention in class and made the effort to do as well as I can.
Which meant I was “different”, and therefore it was ok to go out of their way to torment me.
You read, you play video game and you spend a lot of time in your room. You feel alone, hopeless and lost. You feel like you must be doing something wrong for someone to want to be so nasty to you.
I couldn’t tell my mum, she was a single mum and worked hard to send me to this school, a grammar school, so that I would have a better chance in life.
What do I say? “Hey mum, you know you work all hours so I can go to a good school? Well, I don’t like it. Please send me somewhere else.”
No, you don’t say anything because you realise how much of a struggle it is for a single mother to raise 2 kids and to go without things so you can get the best education possible.
You can’t talk to your teachers, because all that would happen is the bullies would get detention. And then they would come back for you, twice as hard for grassing on them.
So, you go to school every day, you take the punishments, you wish you were somewhere else.
You wish you were invisible, or bigger/stronger than the bullies.
You come home every night and you cry your heart out because there is nobody you can talk to about this, it will never get any better and you know the same thing will happen tomorrow and tomorrow and on and on and on.
Maybe you can’t afford the latest sneakers for games, maybe you wear glasses, or you’re over-weight, or you’re small, or you have a religion that is different, or you’re a different colour.
So many reasons to get bullied.
I spent night after night writing stories (like Cooldogs), playing on my spectrum, reading books or sitting with my star wars toys creating worlds to lose myself in, because anything was better than going to school, where you know this is going to start again.
There may be times when you think about suicide.
It may be 2am and you are awake, stomach in knots because you can’t face what will come when you go through those school gates.
I became withdrawn, didn’t speak much, didn’t go out and tried to be as unseen as possible.
And then I went to college.
Nobody knew me there. I dreaded seeing people from my school there, but nobody was.
And you know what the strange thing is?
I made friends. A lot of friends.
Nobody cared that I wore glasses, nobody cared that I listened to old music, nobody cared that I didn’t like to play football.
These were people that took me for what I was, and didn’t judge me.
I came out of my shell like you wouldn’t believe. I taught myself the drums, I joined a band, I did all the things I should have done when I was at school but didn’t.
I went out with my mates and got drunk, acted the fool and generally goofed off, it was like being let out of a prison cell.
I don’t have any answers if you’re in this position right now, except to say that it WILL stop when you leave school. People outside of school don’t care what you look like/think like etc.
I am no longer a timid little boy, I play in a fantastic band, I have some seriously good friends, I learned to stick up for myself and I take zero crap from anyone now. I’m
And when I see or hear other kids in the same position, I get so angry because nobody, and I mean NOBODY has the right to treat you like that.
Cooldogs had his writing and his dog to save him, I had writing and video-games and movies.
Video games can make you forget about everything else for a while, as can books and movies.
Please, if you’re being bullied and can’t talk to anyone, just hold on and be strong. It WILL end when you leave school, I promise. You’re not stupid or crap, you’re not to blame, you’re not wrong.
You need to keep going and realise that you will meet people that will like you for the same reasons you’re getting abuse now.
I have gone from being a little boy that lived in his head, to being a drummer with good friends, a beautiful girlfriend and the chance to try and help anyone else in the same situation I was.
Please, please don’t let them think you’re a bad person.
Wookie offered his thoughts on the subject, and I want to try and say something about it.
Here goes:
I can say with hand on heart that my schooldays were the most miserable and hated times of my life that I can remember.
Why?
Bullies.
Made my life hell from 12-16 until I left to go to College.
I was small for my age, wore glasses, read a lot and was quiet. In school, this marks you out as a target for others. You’re “weak” or “gay”, and it’s open season on the little kid.
There was a gang of about 6 kids, some my age, some in the year below me that made it their mission in life to harass, taunt, smack and generally abuse on a daily basis.
The train on the way to school, waiting for lessons, walking to the station after school, the train ride home and on the bus until I got off at my stop.
Why?
Because I was quiet, didn’t like sports, never said anything back and just wanted to get on with school and learn stuff. I loved that part of school, learning stuff I didn’t know, I did my homework, paid attention in class and made the effort to do as well as I can.
Which meant I was “different”, and therefore it was ok to go out of their way to torment me.
You read, you play video game and you spend a lot of time in your room. You feel alone, hopeless and lost. You feel like you must be doing something wrong for someone to want to be so nasty to you.
I couldn’t tell my mum, she was a single mum and worked hard to send me to this school, a grammar school, so that I would have a better chance in life.
What do I say? “Hey mum, you know you work all hours so I can go to a good school? Well, I don’t like it. Please send me somewhere else.”
No, you don’t say anything because you realise how much of a struggle it is for a single mother to raise 2 kids and to go without things so you can get the best education possible.
You can’t talk to your teachers, because all that would happen is the bullies would get detention. And then they would come back for you, twice as hard for grassing on them.
So, you go to school every day, you take the punishments, you wish you were somewhere else.
You wish you were invisible, or bigger/stronger than the bullies.
You come home every night and you cry your heart out because there is nobody you can talk to about this, it will never get any better and you know the same thing will happen tomorrow and tomorrow and on and on and on.
Maybe you can’t afford the latest sneakers for games, maybe you wear glasses, or you’re over-weight, or you’re small, or you have a religion that is different, or you’re a different colour.
So many reasons to get bullied.
I spent night after night writing stories (like Cooldogs), playing on my spectrum, reading books or sitting with my star wars toys creating worlds to lose myself in, because anything was better than going to school, where you know this is going to start again.
There may be times when you think about suicide.
It may be 2am and you are awake, stomach in knots because you can’t face what will come when you go through those school gates.
I became withdrawn, didn’t speak much, didn’t go out and tried to be as unseen as possible.
And then I went to college.
Nobody knew me there. I dreaded seeing people from my school there, but nobody was.
And you know what the strange thing is?
I made friends. A lot of friends.
Nobody cared that I wore glasses, nobody cared that I listened to old music, nobody cared that I didn’t like to play football.
These were people that took me for what I was, and didn’t judge me.
I came out of my shell like you wouldn’t believe. I taught myself the drums, I joined a band, I did all the things I should have done when I was at school but didn’t.
I went out with my mates and got drunk, acted the fool and generally goofed off, it was like being let out of a prison cell.
I don’t have any answers if you’re in this position right now, except to say that it WILL stop when you leave school. People outside of school don’t care what you look like/think like etc.
I am no longer a timid little boy, I play in a fantastic band, I have some seriously good friends, I learned to stick up for myself and I take zero crap from anyone now. I’m
And when I see or hear other kids in the same position, I get so angry because nobody, and I mean NOBODY has the right to treat you like that.
Cooldogs had his writing and his dog to save him, I had writing and video-games and movies.
Video games can make you forget about everything else for a while, as can books and movies.
Please, if you’re being bullied and can’t talk to anyone, just hold on and be strong. It WILL end when you leave school, I promise. You’re not stupid or crap, you’re not to blame, you’re not wrong.
You need to keep going and realise that you will meet people that will like you for the same reasons you’re getting abuse now.
I have gone from being a little boy that lived in his head, to being a drummer with good friends, a beautiful girlfriend and the chance to try and help anyone else in the same situation I was.
Please, please don’t let them think you’re a bad person.
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Goatboy, would you believe I was bullied for listening to Pink Floyd three years ago? Luckily I had some Hip Hop on the other side of the tape and said my dad obviously recorded his stuff on the other side...
...Pink Floyd rules!
...Pink Floyd rules!
When I was elevon I was bullied at school, it was horrible, infact I didn't actually look forward to going to bed because of the next morning I knew I had more crap coming up at lunch times and break.
It was at my middle school and although the bullying wasn't exactly bad (mostly verbal) it made me feel horrible as a person. I looked forward to the bell in different ways to the normal 'going home time', for me it was the 'getting away time'. My friends didn't really see it, it was kind of quiet bullying which was the most painful to talk about.
I tried to think what I had possibly done wrong and the fact it that the harder I thought about it the more I realised the bully was the coward, sure they like to pick on weak and quiet people, but I wasn't weak or quiet, so after some determination I faced up to the bully with some strong words and general making a kind of mockery of them. Yes this could have gone many ways, luckily they seemed to get the message of him and after that I knew that High School could really only get better.
Currently I have just finished my High School and in that school I had no real problems with bullies, yes I saw bullying and when I knew the person doing or being bullied I tried to stop it. I managed to make more friends then enemies and I can tell you from going to one of the worst schools in Britain making the correct friends is essential in easily surviving, which I did. No drugs or anything for me though, I am strongly against all kinds of drugs and dangerous habits.
Bullying is a terrible, CRAPPY thing, I would never wish it on anyone and if you are being bullied, my advice would seriously be to talk to someone, don't do what I did, I suppose I was lucky.
NOBODY deserves to be bullied. NOBODY!
Thanks.
It was at my middle school and although the bullying wasn't exactly bad (mostly verbal) it made me feel horrible as a person. I looked forward to the bell in different ways to the normal 'going home time', for me it was the 'getting away time'. My friends didn't really see it, it was kind of quiet bullying which was the most painful to talk about.
I tried to think what I had possibly done wrong and the fact it that the harder I thought about it the more I realised the bully was the coward, sure they like to pick on weak and quiet people, but I wasn't weak or quiet, so after some determination I faced up to the bully with some strong words and general making a kind of mockery of them. Yes this could have gone many ways, luckily they seemed to get the message of him and after that I knew that High School could really only get better.
Currently I have just finished my High School and in that school I had no real problems with bullies, yes I saw bullying and when I knew the person doing or being bullied I tried to stop it. I managed to make more friends then enemies and I can tell you from going to one of the worst schools in Britain making the correct friends is essential in easily surviving, which I did. No drugs or anything for me though, I am strongly against all kinds of drugs and dangerous habits.
Bullying is a terrible, CRAPPY thing, I would never wish it on anyone and if you are being bullied, my advice would seriously be to talk to someone, don't do what I did, I suppose I was lucky.
NOBODY deserves to be bullied. NOBODY!
Thanks.
Applause to Goatboy. Ok, I'm new here, so I hope you'll accept me - I just want to say congratulations to Goatboy and anyone who has faced this unfortunate predicament and gotten through it. This may seem strange, but if anyone needs to speak about bullying or has any problems, then I'm happy to listen.
Always remember, you're not the one with the problem. They are.
Always remember, you're not the one with the problem. They are.
I used to be bullied. I was fat, wore glasses, had ginger hair, was crap at sports, listened to old music and was, though I say it myself, the most intelligent kid in the year. The whole kit and kaboodle. I was inevitably bullied for these, but one day I decided I had had enough. The next time a bully came up to me I told him to f**k off and kicked hil in the bo11ocks. That was the last I saw of him.
Since then I've moved on to a grammar school which is more interested in achedemic achievement than in physical prowess. There were lots of intelligent people here, many of whom wore glasses. I lost the weight, made lots of friends and fitted right in.
The moral of the story is if you can, stick up for yourself. I understand that if there are loads of bullys all bigger than you this won't work, but if you are big you should try it. One possibility is to learn a martial art. It may sound extreme, but my mate did it and his confidence increaded massively.
Good luck!
Since then I've moved on to a grammar school which is more interested in achedemic achievement than in physical prowess. There were lots of intelligent people here, many of whom wore glasses. I lost the weight, made lots of friends and fitted right in.
The moral of the story is if you can, stick up for yourself. I understand that if there are loads of bullys all bigger than you this won't work, but if you are big you should try it. One possibility is to learn a martial art. It may sound extreme, but my mate did it and his confidence increaded massively.
Good luck!
It should of been Thraves not Thieves.
Sorry
Sorry
Although i have not been bullied, my brother was bullied in secondary school.
I know the bullies put him through hell, and everyday he had to be forced to go to school by my parents, who kept telling him that if he stopped going to school the bullies would of won and he had to stick up for himself.
Not by fighting back, as it makes you just as bad as the bullies themselves. Although it was only verbal it was just as bad as physical.
In a weird way, after it stopped he became really goods friends with them and it has brought even more confidence, which has helped him in university.
If you are being bullied, just remember what Grand Thieves said before, 'Please... the next time you feel suicidal, remember that good will come out of it. Those that survive the trumors of life, death, bullying, illnesses... they go on, and they will succeed.'
I know the bullies put him through hell, and everyday he had to be forced to go to school by my parents, who kept telling him that if he stopped going to school the bullies would of won and he had to stick up for himself.
Not by fighting back, as it makes you just as bad as the bullies themselves. Although it was only verbal it was just as bad as physical.
In a weird way, after it stopped he became really goods friends with them and it has brought even more confidence, which has helped him in university.
If you are being bullied, just remember what Grand Thieves said before, 'Please... the next time you feel suicidal, remember that good will come out of it. Those that survive the trumors of life, death, bullying, illnesses... they go on, and they will succeed.'
Which is why I took so much offence to Corleone/Fr!day/DavidD.
Especially in these forums, there is no place for hostility, rudeness, putting people down and general nastiness.
I'm not saying we should all agree on everything, but that guy was getting out of hand.
He's registered again, I just hope he behaves responsibly this time.
Bullying and putting people down, trying to make them feel stupid etc has no place in our lives, especially on a forum, where the only thing that matters is what you say.
Especially in these forums, there is no place for hostility, rudeness, putting people down and general nastiness.
I'm not saying we should all agree on everything, but that guy was getting out of hand.
He's registered again, I just hope he behaves responsibly this time.
Bullying and putting people down, trying to make them feel stupid etc has no place in our lives, especially on a forum, where the only thing that matters is what you say.
I agree, chatting is a good way of escaping.
As i mentioned before, if anyone who is being bullied or whatever wants to have a chat, just let me know. I've been through it so i know what it's like.
As i mentioned before, if anyone who is being bullied or whatever wants to have a chat, just let me know. I've been through it so i know what it's like.
This, as in the forums, are a great way of escaping too. Nobody cares what you look like, or how you dress... what sex you are, the colour of your skin, your background...
It's just chatting. And it's great.
It's just chatting. And it's great.
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