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"Embarrassing Problem"

OK this has to be theeeeeeeeee most embarassing topic I can ever talk to anyone about.

However, I am really concerned so I will risk the embarassment.

Basically I am really failing to understand why my bum area always smells. PLEASE dont make toilet humour jokes, I am a thoroughly hygenic person and in very good health. However, it always seems as if I have pumped constantly or even soiled my pants with faeces.

Neither of the two are actually the case, and it makes me very very nervous. For example, I work in ASDA behind the till and whenever I stand up to go for my break or whatever, the chair will always stink of poo even if I have only been there for a few minutes. And NO, there is absolutely nothing ''up there'' which may be causing the smell. The worst thing is, its a running joke amongst ALL of my work colleagues and they think I cant see them pulling disgusted faces. It does seem to get worse whenever I sit down. I cannot go in a car with ANYONE, and if I get onto a bus I have to sit on my own at the back with the windows open.

It has actually resorted to me visiting the loo every chance I can and spraying perfume onto my bum. Part of me felt it could be a simple case of sweating, however I highly doubt it because I never actually do sweat around that area :' { I bath myself twice a day and always ensure when I am doing a number 2 that I am completely clean ;' {

Now I know you are all probably laughing your heads off, but please understand this is a REAL problem I have and it is driving me insane with anger.

Well the hosepipe might work, you could also add a touch of bleach.

he?

J Nash wrote:
> poor merm :' {

Yeah, he stinks and people take the mick out of him, its not fair...seriously...

poor merm :' {

Del Rogeo wrote:
> I wasn't an assface. I gave very helpful, albeit obvious advice.

True, sorry ;' {
Thanks to the people who were more thoughtful, but the rest of you can go off and die if you want :' {

I thought I was alone with such a problem.

The bumhair one was serious. :'(

Memorandum! wrote:
> Yeah, hilarious.
> I should have known you'd all be insensitive assfaces.
>
> Thanks a lot, morons.

I wasn't an assface. I gave very helpful, albeit obvious advice.

Memorandum! wrote:
> Yeah, hilarious.
> I should have known you'd all be insensitive assfaces.
>
> Thanks a lot, morons.

Ass faces? That would also smell...LMAO

Yeah, hilarious.
I should have known you'd all be insensitive assfaces.

Thanks a lot, morons.