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This time we have to be more sneaky. It's not enough to just shoot Nunez to ensure he won't play, I'm beginning to suspect Rafa would put Nunez's corpse on the bench anyway. So this means we have to be sneaky-like. I suggest luring Nunez out of his house, which he surely shares with other wasters like Richie Partridge, by the use of a cunning No 7 shirt on a string. Nunez will surely think Harry Kewell has been killed, possibly by me. He will then believe the No 7 shirt appearing at his door to be an omen that Rafa wants him play regularly on the right-wing. He will follow the shirt to a hut within which Harry Kewell and Ant will be. Ant will be charged with the responsibility of making sure these two diabolical players cannot be in Turin. This is OK because Ant's favourite players are these two.
Juventus will believe the whole squad will be arriving together. This is not the case. We will have sent Baros and Smicer on a mission, Czech-style. They will have hitchhiked to Turin, and adopted a disguise (put their greasy locks in a hairnet) to ensure they are not detected. Their mission will be to sabotage Pavel Nedved. Pavel will welcome them into his house because they share national allegiance, but his trust will be misplaced. Baros will do all the work because Smicer is good for nothing. He just came along so Baros would have someone to talk to. They will tie Nedved up in the shed.
On the night, Benitez will be confounded by the lack of Nunez and will be forced - listen carefully now - to actually play 90 minutes with at least 1 recognised striker on the pitch. Capello will be stunned, because he had been given to understand that Benitez doesn't like playing with any strikers at all, but a 6 man midfield. He is already confused because Nedved hasn't turned up. He will be SO confused, in fact, that he will bring himself on for Buffon.
Milan Milan Milan, seeing that there is only an old man with a weird fake-tan in the goalmouth, will be inspired to score a hatrick, which is just as well because Miner Dudek will be back in goal, allowing 70 yard efforts from Blasi to go in.
This is how we will beat Juventus.
Juventus will believe the whole squad will be arriving together. This is not the case. We will have sent Baros and Smicer on a mission, Czech-style. They will have hitchhiked to Turin, and adopted a disguise (put their greasy locks in a hairnet) to ensure they are not detected. Their mission will be to sabotage Pavel Nedved. Pavel will welcome them into his house because they share national allegiance, but his trust will be misplaced. Baros will do all the work because Smicer is good for nothing. He just came along so Baros would have someone to talk to. They will tie Nedved up in the shed.
On the night, Benitez will be confounded by the lack of Nunez and will be forced - listen carefully now - to actually play 90 minutes with at least 1 recognised striker on the pitch. Capello will be stunned, because he had been given to understand that Benitez doesn't like playing with any strikers at all, but a 6 man midfield. He is already confused because Nedved hasn't turned up. He will be SO confused, in fact, that he will bring himself on for Buffon.
Milan Milan Milan, seeing that there is only an old man with a weird fake-tan in the goalmouth, will be inspired to score a hatrick, which is just as well because Miner Dudek will be back in goal, allowing 70 yard efforts from Blasi to go in.
This is how we will beat Juventus.
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Woooooooooooooooooo!
What a game, I was with my mates (4 of whom support Manchester United, 1 Watford and the other was also a 'Pool fan) so they kept bringing up how heartbreaking it would be for Juve to score in the dying minutes. I really wanted to turn the TV off but with Ambassador Cisse on the pitch I just had to keep watching.
Is it me, or does he look much much younger now he's had his hair chopped? He looks a bit like Diouf, without the ugliness.
Vintage stuff from Xabi, awesome defensive performance (yes ashley I was cheering on Djimi Traore) and Nunez was pretty good too. :P
Chelsea, here we come...
What a game, I was with my mates (4 of whom support Manchester United, 1 Watford and the other was also a 'Pool fan) so they kept bringing up how heartbreaking it would be for Juve to score in the dying minutes. I really wanted to turn the TV off but with Ambassador Cisse on the pitch I just had to keep watching.
Is it me, or does he look much much younger now he's had his hair chopped? He looks a bit like Diouf, without the ugliness.
Vintage stuff from Xabi, awesome defensive performance (yes ashley I was cheering on Djimi Traore) and Nunez was pretty good too. :P
Chelsea, here we come...
Yeah, like that one said.
Except he hasn't really shown big game great performances from what I've seen, like PN has.
Good squad player though. He's like our Giles Grimandi.
Except he hasn't really shown big game great performances from what I've seen, like PN has.
Good squad player though. He's like our Giles Grimandi.
Igor played well, he's like our P.Neville......
Is it only me that seriously thinks Igor Biscan shouldn't be allowed to walk on a free this summer?
He's been great as a squad player this season, and Hamann's only got one more left in him. Don't let him go on a free, Rafa.
He's been great as a squad player this season, and Hamann's only got one more left in him. Don't let him go on a free, Rafa.
Kawada wrote:
> Clazon wrote:
> I hope Chelsea win. Steven will have a say in that matter though.
>
> Yup he will make sure they do :-D
Thank god you infered that one, Lakers.
:)
> Clazon wrote:
> I hope Chelsea win. Steven will have a say in that matter though.
>
> Yup he will make sure they do :-D
Thank god you infered that one, Lakers.
:)
Clazon wrote:
> I hope Chelsea win. Steven will have a say in that matter though.
Yup he will make sure they do :-D
> I hope Chelsea win. Steven will have a say in that matter though.
Yup he will make sure they do :-D
I was pretty impressed that Liverpool did the job considering Xabi lacked fitness, Riise had a bad game, Biscan is slow and Nunez is sh*t. Therefore a crappy midfield- the area where Juve are usually so good.
Then I thought about what a flukey and shocking performance it was. They hit the pos**t and you blew 2 clear cut chances.
I hope Chelsea win. Steven will have a say in that matter though.
Then I thought about what a flukey and shocking performance it was. They hit the pos**t and you blew 2 clear cut chances.
I hope Chelsea win. Steven will have a say in that matter though.
JFH wrote:
> That's what you get for not having faith. You've lost a whole
> £2, I hope you've learnt your lesson.
Iknow. I could have bought a big bar of chocolate with that £2 :(
I'm still up on the week though.
> That's what you get for not having faith. You've lost a whole
> £2, I hope you've learnt your lesson.
Iknow. I could have bought a big bar of chocolate with that £2 :(
I'm still up on the week though.
WALK ON
WALK ON
WITH ANTON-IO NUNEZ
What a defensive performance, eh? Carragher and Hyypia should get knighted. Hyypia should at least get made King Of Finland.
Nedved, you should be ashamed of yourself. Well, actually, every single Czech on the field should feel ashamed of yourself. If we'd lost 1-0, every single person would be looking at Milan. I felt glad for him with Dances With Doctors replaced him. Ah, Pride of Auxerre, it was good to see you again (anyone see that Sky Sports article? The Auxerre coach said he knew he'd heal stupidly fast. Heh)
We won because of Nun-ez, Nun-ez, Nun-ez
WALK ON
WITH ANTON-IO NUNEZ
What a defensive performance, eh? Carragher and Hyypia should get knighted. Hyypia should at least get made King Of Finland.
Nedved, you should be ashamed of yourself. Well, actually, every single Czech on the field should feel ashamed of yourself. If we'd lost 1-0, every single person would be looking at Milan. I felt glad for him with Dances With Doctors replaced him. Ah, Pride of Auxerre, it was good to see you again (anyone see that Sky Sports article? The Auxerre coach said he knew he'd heal stupidly fast. Heh)
We won because of Nun-ez, Nun-ez, Nun-ez
* Goes to put bet on Stevie Gerrard scoring an own goal in the semi's *
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