GetDotted Domains

Viewing Thread:
"SSC19 – Plea"

The "Creative Writing" forum, which includes Retro Game Reviews, has been archived and is now read-only. You cannot post here or create a new thread or review on this forum.

Mon 21/02/05 at 20:56
Regular
"SOUP!"
Posts: 13,017
Her large greeny-grey eyes encapsulated my very soul and send shockwaves down my spine, making me tingle with pleasured agony. Neatly groomed auburn hair parted to the side, held delicately in place with a decorative sunflower. A kiss of crimson across her heart shaped mouth made her my Mona Lisa.

I glanced up at her angelic face then back down at my feet. I dug my hands deep into my pockets, angrily stalling for time. I didn’t know how to tell her, I couldn’t see my angel broken on the rocks before me by my own emotional treason.

I hunched my figure forward and fixed my eyes on my shoes, unable to look her in the eyes.

“Just tell me… please.” She echoed

I glanced up to see her eager eyes delving deep into my soul. Grooming me for answers.

“There was one…” I trailed off.

“Who was she?”

“She meant nothing..” I began, but I was cut short by another “Who was she?”

Her voice began to crack and her lower lip trembled.

“She was called Sarah, but, look I was drunk”

Mascara trails raced down her soft cheeks. “Don’t you care about me?”

“I love you”

“Then why?”

“I-I don’t know, it meant nothing.”

“How can I believe that?” she snivelled

“Take me back?” I not so much suggested as pleaded.

I tilted my neck down to gaze once again at my feet. Waiting for the verdict. For the executioner to deliver her final verdict. A silence of a second hung in the air for a forever.

“I don’t think I can…” she spluttered. Hiding her tear-stained cheeks with her hands.

My world stopped turning and my Hollywood ending was cut short. I died standing on my feet, resent clogged my arteries and my heart stopped pumping.

“I love you Dawn” I choked through muffled tears. “I love you”.

Now it was her turn to look down at her feet and think of words to nurse a broken heart.

“I’m sorry” she coldly muttered.

I fell to my hands and knees, shuddering pathetically. “I don’t want to lose you” I begged.

My heart in my mouth and my soul in pieces I was torn apart by the solemn ear-splitting wrath of “I think we should just be friends.”

The hot burn of sick at the back of my throat, peering up with puppy-dog eyes at my lost angel my hope was vanquished, pathetically crouching on hands-and-knees, just before Dawn.
Sat 26/02/05 at 14:53
Regular
"not dead"
Posts: 11,145
Captured the moment well, though as others have said, it’s been done before. I liked it though, the descriptions are good, the dialogue believable.
Fri 25/02/05 at 23:35
"period drama"
Posts: 19,792
Lies, untruths, falsehoods and BS©®™[S]FFF, always
Fri 25/02/05 at 23:29
Regular
"gsybe you!"
Posts: 18,825
Fact. Verified by FFF himself.

I ween!
Fri 25/02/05 at 23:23
"period drama"
Posts: 19,792
All words©®™[S]Cycloon, for all of time
Fri 25/02/05 at 23:19
Regular
"gsybe you!"
Posts: 18,825
Feef is mine.

I swoon at your outrageous philandering.
Fri 25/02/05 at 23:17
"period drama"
Posts: 19,792
I did?
What a dirty feef.
Fri 25/02/05 at 23:06
Regular
"gsybe you!"
Posts: 18,825
You stole that from my post.

Tut-tut
Fri 25/02/05 at 23:05
"period drama"
Posts: 19,792
Very nice, liked it.
Gentle, familiar, lovely.
Fri 25/02/05 at 15:03
Regular
"gsybe you!"
Posts: 18,825
Melodramatic is an understatment.
Fri 25/02/05 at 13:29
Regular
"Going nowhere fast"
Posts: 6,574
I was going to use 'Dawn' in the sense of a name. Glad I didn't now although it would have in no way have been as syrupy as this one :)

Freeola & GetDotted are rated 5 Stars

Check out some of our customer reviews below:

Top-notch internet service
Excellent internet service and customer service. Top-notch in replying to my comments.
Duncan
Second to none...
So far the services you provide are second to none. Keep up the good work.
Andy

View More Reviews

Need some help? Give us a call on 01376 55 60 60

Go to Support Centre

It appears you are using an old browser, as such, some parts of the Freeola and Getdotted site will not work as intended. Using the latest version of your browser, or another browser such as Google Chrome, Mozilla Firefox, or Opera will provide a better, safer browsing experience for you.