Anyway, pound-for-pound Futurama is turning out far greater than the Simpsons, and I find the humour much more appealing. Glad they didn't ruin it by stretching the magic out too far. I'll start:
"Fry, come quick, it's me, Bigface."
"Bigfoot! You're real! And you taught yourself English!"
"Y'know, I think I've actually learnt something from Bender. So long, jerkwads!"
Linda: "All in all, this is one day Mittens the kitten won't soon forget."
Morbo: "Kittens give Morbo gas. In lighter news, the city of New New York is doomed. Blame rests with known human Professor Hubert Farnsworth and his tiny, inferior brain."
Morbo: "Morbo can't understand his TelePrompTer. He forgot how you say that letter that looks like a man with a hat."
Linda: "It's a T, it goes tah."
Morbo: "Hello little man. I WILL DESTROY YOU!"
And one from Fry:
"Its just like the story of the grasshopper and the octopus. All year long the grasshopper kept burying acorns for winter while the octopus mooched off his girlfriend and watched TV. Then the winter came, and the grasshopper died, and the octopus ate all his acorns and also he got a racecar. Is any of this getting through to you?"
Bender (looks at different cigars ranging from $10 to $300 and final cigar priced at $10,000); I'll give you $300 for it.
Cigar Seller ; I'm sorry sir no, but we do have a $300 cigar?
Bender; Nah, i'll just take your $300 set of burgular tools.
Cigar Seller ; Wonderful choice sir.
(I can't remember the exact words)
(As Bender takes Leela to 'The Brig')
Bender: "Don't worry Leela, someday we'll look back at this and laugh."
(Bender stands in doorway)
Bender: "Ah ha ha ha hahahahahahahaha!"
Professor: Leela, who are you talking to?
Zap: Just a broken down hobo who's hit rock bottom, and his commanding officer.
Zap: There's one thing you've forgotten: rock crushes scissors. But paper covers rock! And scissors cut paper! Kif, we have a conundrum. And fetch me a large rock.
Zap: What drives a man to be neutral? A lust for gold? Power? Or just a cold heart filled with neutrality?
We have failed to uphold Brannigan's law. But I did make it with a hot alien babe. And is that not what man dreamed of as he first looked up at the stars? Kif I'm asking you a question!
Fry: "Are there really any giant birds in space?"
Professor: "Oh, my no. It's breakfast time."
*Professor walks into kitchen*
Professor: "I hope everyone likes eggs!"
*Professor approaches massive 6-pack of eggs. A vulture-like bird hatches from one of the eggs and attempts to eat the Professor*
Feel free to correct any mistakes I've made!
Leela: "Actually, most doctors are rich"
Zoidberg: "What? When did this happen? You're joking, right? That's not funny!"
Zoidberg: "Hermes quiet, I'm deducing things!"
Bender: "That plot makes perfect sense, wink wink"
Zoidberg: "Bender, you said wink wink out loud"
Bender: "No I didn't, raise middle finger"
Frakes: "Yes! Front row!"
After Kiff sighs at the prospect of being 'snoo-snooed' to death:
Zapp: "What are you, gay?"
Bender: "Cheese it!!!"