The "Freeola Customer Forum" forum, which includes Retro Game Reviews, has been archived and is now read-only. You cannot post here or create a new thread or review on this forum.
I sit here and think about what could have been; always thinking what could have happened if I didn’t do that. Why is it I can’t appreciate what I have, how I always want more then what I have?
Is it greed I ask myself, or is it just wanting to better my self. I can’t decide.
I want every thing in my life to be perfect, I want the perfect family the perfect job, and I want happiness. What is perfect though?
Can anyone say they have the perfect life?
I always say to my self life is not perfect and nobody is perfect. Yet I always question it.
If I am unaware about what perfect is how do I know what I have isn’t?
Then there is me this individual that sits and puts herself down all the time. I always go on about how the way people look doesn’t bother me. Everybody is different and I don’t judge any one about there appearance. Yet I constantly judge myself, put my self down. Hate the way I look.
The question is why?
I am who I am; it might not be perfect not your ideal cuppa tea. But it’s me.
There are so many questions I ask my self, never enough answers, I constantly go through things in my head. Trying to work things out and why things happen and why we think the way we do.
Why is it I always question everything I do, always unsure about things?
Something’s are just best left unanswered I guess.
just thought id share that with you
Is it greed I ask myself, or is it just wanting to better my self. I can’t decide.
I want every thing in my life to be perfect, I want the perfect family the perfect job, and I want happiness. What is perfect though?
Can anyone say they have the perfect life?
I always say to my self life is not perfect and nobody is perfect. Yet I always question it.
If I am unaware about what perfect is how do I know what I have isn’t?
Then there is me this individual that sits and puts herself down all the time. I always go on about how the way people look doesn’t bother me. Everybody is different and I don’t judge any one about there appearance. Yet I constantly judge myself, put my self down. Hate the way I look.
The question is why?
I am who I am; it might not be perfect not your ideal cuppa tea. But it’s me.
There are so many questions I ask my self, never enough answers, I constantly go through things in my head. Trying to work things out and why things happen and why we think the way we do.
Why is it I always question everything I do, always unsure about things?
Something’s are just best left unanswered I guess.
just thought id share that with you
Page:
I sit here and think about what could have been; always thinking what could have happened if I didn’t do that. Why is it I can’t appreciate what I have, how I always want more then what I have?
Is it greed I ask myself, or is it just wanting to better my self. I can’t decide.
I want every thing in my life to be perfect, I want the perfect family the perfect job, and I want happiness. What is perfect though?
Can anyone say they have the perfect life?
I always say to my self life is not perfect and nobody is perfect. Yet I always question it.
If I am unaware about what perfect is how do I know what I have isn’t?
Then there is me this individual that sits and puts herself down all the time. I always go on about how the way people look doesn’t bother me. Everybody is different and I don’t judge any one about there appearance. Yet I constantly judge myself, put my self down. Hate the way I look.
The question is why?
I am who I am; it might not be perfect not your ideal cuppa tea. But it’s me.
There are so many questions I ask my self, never enough answers, I constantly go through things in my head. Trying to work things out and why things happen and why we think the way we do.
Why is it I always question everything I do, always unsure about things?
Something’s are just best left unanswered I guess.
just thought id share that with you
Is it greed I ask myself, or is it just wanting to better my self. I can’t decide.
I want every thing in my life to be perfect, I want the perfect family the perfect job, and I want happiness. What is perfect though?
Can anyone say they have the perfect life?
I always say to my self life is not perfect and nobody is perfect. Yet I always question it.
If I am unaware about what perfect is how do I know what I have isn’t?
Then there is me this individual that sits and puts herself down all the time. I always go on about how the way people look doesn’t bother me. Everybody is different and I don’t judge any one about there appearance. Yet I constantly judge myself, put my self down. Hate the way I look.
The question is why?
I am who I am; it might not be perfect not your ideal cuppa tea. But it’s me.
There are so many questions I ask my self, never enough answers, I constantly go through things in my head. Trying to work things out and why things happen and why we think the way we do.
Why is it I always question everything I do, always unsure about things?
Something’s are just best left unanswered I guess.
just thought id share that with you
Perfection is in fact fictional used only to describe fictional or poetic devices. Nothing and nobody is perfect, every thing and everyone has their flaws and foibles, and it seems like your self-critical nature is your little flaw.
It's human nature to be greedy, consciously or not, and we will always strive for greener pastures. Don't hate yourself for that, its human nature.
It's human nature to be greedy, consciously or not, and we will always strive for greener pastures. Don't hate yourself for that, its human nature.
As long as you're not dead, you're doing the whole life thing pretty well if you ask me. Anything else is just a bonus.
Ask yourself:- How many other perfect people do you know?
I'll guess non.
Ask yourself:- How many other perfect people do you know?
I'll guess non.
Life'll become perfect when you stop looking for perfection! :-)
Asking questions is surely better than not asking questions. All you have to do is be sure that you ask the right ones.
From the start of your post it sounds like a lot of the questions you are asking are "what if I had.." or "what if I hadn't..". Stop looking back and ask questions about the future. "what if I did.." etc and if you like the answer you come to try it out and see where you end up. I've always thought that it's better to do something and regret it than not do something and regret not doing it, however it's easier to think that way than it is to act that way.
Perfection is something that probably isn't attainable, and it'll always be human nature to want more. To become desensitized to perfection and yearn more when there is no more. Besides, perfection sounds pretty boring to me. You know they can make perfect fake diamonds for jewellery, but the difference between fake diamonds and real ones are the imperfections that make them shine and sparkle in the light.
One thing that I have learnt over the years is that nearly everyone is over critical of themselves, or sees themselves in a bad way. I know I am. Once you realise that you're half way there to relaxing. The second thing that you really need to realise is that how people who know you percieve you has far far more to do with your personality than anything else. I've known people I thought attractive but then once I found they weren't nice people gone I can't imagine ever being attracted to them> The same is true the other way around.
One good thing I'm reading between the lines in your post is that you seem to be suffering from what some people call "ugly duckling syndrome". As one of my aquaintences put it it's when "a girl isn't so hot when they're growing up, and then they get hot but don't realise it so they stay a nice person". It's a rare occurence, but all of my favourite female friends suffer from it on some level.
Enough rambling. I really should do some work.
From the start of your post it sounds like a lot of the questions you are asking are "what if I had.." or "what if I hadn't..". Stop looking back and ask questions about the future. "what if I did.." etc and if you like the answer you come to try it out and see where you end up. I've always thought that it's better to do something and regret it than not do something and regret not doing it, however it's easier to think that way than it is to act that way.
Perfection is something that probably isn't attainable, and it'll always be human nature to want more. To become desensitized to perfection and yearn more when there is no more. Besides, perfection sounds pretty boring to me. You know they can make perfect fake diamonds for jewellery, but the difference between fake diamonds and real ones are the imperfections that make them shine and sparkle in the light.
One thing that I have learnt over the years is that nearly everyone is over critical of themselves, or sees themselves in a bad way. I know I am. Once you realise that you're half way there to relaxing. The second thing that you really need to realise is that how people who know you percieve you has far far more to do with your personality than anything else. I've known people I thought attractive but then once I found they weren't nice people gone I can't imagine ever being attracted to them> The same is true the other way around.
One good thing I'm reading between the lines in your post is that you seem to be suffering from what some people call "ugly duckling syndrome". As one of my aquaintences put it it's when "a girl isn't so hot when they're growing up, and then they get hot but don't realise it so they stay a nice person". It's a rare occurence, but all of my favourite female friends suffer from it on some level.
Enough rambling. I really should do some work.
Ah, this post feels familiar :^)
@ng3l wrote:
> Then there is me this individual that sits and puts herself down all
> the time. I always go on about how the way people look doesn’t bother
> me. Everybody is different and I don’t judge any one about there
> appearance. Yet I constantly judge myself, put my self down. Hate the
> way I look.
> The question is why?
I don't know, but it might be because society generally really does judge everyone on their appearance, so even if you don't do it yourself, you're aware that other people do. Which causes you to worry about it
(I use the term 'you' generically, and it includes me, who also does this :^) )
Or could it be that rather than not judging people on their appearance at all, you've simply surpressed it so that you judge people much *less* on their appearance than most do ?
(Not meant to question your integrity - nobody's perfect and it's a natural instinct, which society and the media generally reinforces, to judge people on appearance - that must be (at least) close to impossible to surpress completely.
If so, it could be that you simply judge yourself much more harshly than you do other people.
I remember a time when I was regretting some of the mistakes I'd made in my past, then I realised 'hey, pretty much everyone I know has made the same mistakes, and to be honest, usually to a worse extent than I did'.
Then I lightened up on myself a little.
Or maybe its just that you don't expect other people to be perfect, but you do expect it from yourself.
Similar to the above possibility, but I think slightly distinct.
> I want every thing in my life to be perfect, I want the perfect
> family the perfect job, and I want happiness. What is perfect though?
>
> Can anyone say they have the perfect life?
> I always say to my self life is not perfect and nobody is perfect.
> Yet I always question it.
Heh. Been there too. I've been thinking careers, and rejecting virtually every possibility that comes along.
I think I have to learn to accept less than perfect too.
I suppose it's about replacing the search for perfection with the search for 'acceptably good'.
I think if you can accept that you'll never achieve perfection (and forgive yourself for that!), replacing perfection is relatively easy to do.
Then the hard part s setting your new goals...
@ng3l wrote:
> Then there is me this individual that sits and puts herself down all
> the time. I always go on about how the way people look doesn’t bother
> me. Everybody is different and I don’t judge any one about there
> appearance. Yet I constantly judge myself, put my self down. Hate the
> way I look.
> The question is why?
I don't know, but it might be because society generally really does judge everyone on their appearance, so even if you don't do it yourself, you're aware that other people do. Which causes you to worry about it
(I use the term 'you' generically, and it includes me, who also does this :^) )
Or could it be that rather than not judging people on their appearance at all, you've simply surpressed it so that you judge people much *less* on their appearance than most do ?
(Not meant to question your integrity - nobody's perfect and it's a natural instinct, which society and the media generally reinforces, to judge people on appearance - that must be (at least) close to impossible to surpress completely.
If so, it could be that you simply judge yourself much more harshly than you do other people.
I remember a time when I was regretting some of the mistakes I'd made in my past, then I realised 'hey, pretty much everyone I know has made the same mistakes, and to be honest, usually to a worse extent than I did'.
Then I lightened up on myself a little.
Or maybe its just that you don't expect other people to be perfect, but you do expect it from yourself.
Similar to the above possibility, but I think slightly distinct.
> I want every thing in my life to be perfect, I want the perfect
> family the perfect job, and I want happiness. What is perfect though?
>
> Can anyone say they have the perfect life?
> I always say to my self life is not perfect and nobody is perfect.
> Yet I always question it.
Heh. Been there too. I've been thinking careers, and rejecting virtually every possibility that comes along.
I think I have to learn to accept less than perfect too.
I suppose it's about replacing the search for perfection with the search for 'acceptably good'.
I think if you can accept that you'll never achieve perfection (and forgive yourself for that!), replacing perfection is relatively easy to do.
Then the hard part s setting your new goals...
Thanks for your replys, some very good things has been written. I'll read through them again before i reply further.
@ng3l wrote:
> I sit here and think about what could have been; always thinking what
> could have happened if I didn’t do that. Why is it I can’t appreciate
> what I have, how I always want more then what I have?
> Is it greed I ask myself, or is it just wanting to better my self. I
> can’t decide.
Grass is greener syndrome, it's natural to always want better for ourselves, you need to ask yourself is " Is what i have enough for me ",
" am i happy " and " Can i be happier "
Some people give up the content life they have and gamble thinking they will find something better, and some win the bet and some don't, it's all about whether you're willing to gamble, but for you one thing remains, you always have Tommy.
> I want every thing in my life to be perfect, I want the perfect
> family the perfect job, and I want happiness. What is perfect though?
> Can anyone say they have the perfect life?
> I always say to my self life is not perfect and nobody is perfect.
> Yet I always question it.
> If I am unaware about what perfect is how do I know what I have
> isn’t?
No-one, not one person has had a perfect life, and is suspect you wouldn't want it if you had it, the idea that things couldn't get any better and there is nothing left for me to do would drive me into a huge depression, we always need something to aim for.
As for have you got enough, only you know the answer to that, it's not something that is always a definite answer though, it changes with time just like people do, what is enough for you now may not be enough in a months time, do you feel that what you have now is enough for you, would you be happy to live the rest of your life as you are now?
> Then there is me this individual that sits and puts herself down all
> the time. I always go on about how the way people look doesn’t bother
> me. Everybody is different and I don’t judge any one about there
> appearance. Yet I constantly judge myself, put my self down. Hate the
> way I look.
> The question is why?
> I am who I am; it might not be perfect not your ideal cuppa tea. But
> it’s me.
You try to stress the unimportance of looks because you don't want to judge people on something you don't want to be jugded on, you try to take it out of the equation.
Sort of like, i won't judge you on looks so you won't judge me, does that make sense ?
> There are so many questions I ask my self, never enough answers, I
> constantly go through things in my head. Trying to work things out
> and why things happen and why we think the way we do.
> Why is it I always question everything I do, always unsure about
> things?
Something has taken your confidence and you need to find it, i wish you could have the faith in yourself that others have in you.
> Something’s are just best left unanswered I guess.
That depends on whether you are happy.
> just thought id share that with you
You can talk to me anytime you want, i will give you my full attention.
> I sit here and think about what could have been; always thinking what
> could have happened if I didn’t do that. Why is it I can’t appreciate
> what I have, how I always want more then what I have?
> Is it greed I ask myself, or is it just wanting to better my self. I
> can’t decide.
Grass is greener syndrome, it's natural to always want better for ourselves, you need to ask yourself is " Is what i have enough for me ",
" am i happy " and " Can i be happier "
Some people give up the content life they have and gamble thinking they will find something better, and some win the bet and some don't, it's all about whether you're willing to gamble, but for you one thing remains, you always have Tommy.
> I want every thing in my life to be perfect, I want the perfect
> family the perfect job, and I want happiness. What is perfect though?
> Can anyone say they have the perfect life?
> I always say to my self life is not perfect and nobody is perfect.
> Yet I always question it.
> If I am unaware about what perfect is how do I know what I have
> isn’t?
No-one, not one person has had a perfect life, and is suspect you wouldn't want it if you had it, the idea that things couldn't get any better and there is nothing left for me to do would drive me into a huge depression, we always need something to aim for.
As for have you got enough, only you know the answer to that, it's not something that is always a definite answer though, it changes with time just like people do, what is enough for you now may not be enough in a months time, do you feel that what you have now is enough for you, would you be happy to live the rest of your life as you are now?
> Then there is me this individual that sits and puts herself down all
> the time. I always go on about how the way people look doesn’t bother
> me. Everybody is different and I don’t judge any one about there
> appearance. Yet I constantly judge myself, put my self down. Hate the
> way I look.
> The question is why?
> I am who I am; it might not be perfect not your ideal cuppa tea. But
> it’s me.
You try to stress the unimportance of looks because you don't want to judge people on something you don't want to be jugded on, you try to take it out of the equation.
Sort of like, i won't judge you on looks so you won't judge me, does that make sense ?
> There are so many questions I ask my self, never enough answers, I
> constantly go through things in my head. Trying to work things out
> and why things happen and why we think the way we do.
> Why is it I always question everything I do, always unsure about
> things?
Something has taken your confidence and you need to find it, i wish you could have the faith in yourself that others have in you.
> Something’s are just best left unanswered I guess.
That depends on whether you are happy.
> just thought id share that with you
You can talk to me anytime you want, i will give you my full attention.
I see that nobody and nothing is perfect. However like I say I have a habit of always questioning myself on different aspects of my life, Perfection being one of them. I guess everyone always wants that little bit more in life. I am one to say I am grateful for what I have then later I’ll be like. Well if I had that etc… No matter how much I say nothings perfect, I always think some how it can be. I guess I have a lot to learn.
Well no I am not dead so my life is going pretty well, and yes everything else should be a bonus. This is why if I spend the rest of my life questioning things I won’t get any further in life. This will bring me to what someone else has mentioned in a bit.
I think you are right in what you said, well in away. If I stop looking for perfection life will become perfect. Maybe not perfection, but it might improve.
I question everything I do, I just got into the habit of doing it for some reason. If I questioned things less and just did thing, and let things happen I’d get a lot more done and probably enjoy things more. I think I question things I do to try and get things right and make the best decisions. Looking for perfection rather then taking things as they are. I think if everything did end up “Perfect”, id only question that too. And I would wonder why it is so perfect!
Appearance is something I have never really bothered about, only the way I look. In my eyes im not all that to look at. Many people tell me different and I can’t see what they see. I hate to look in the mirror and I am always been judged my others, I see people get judged by others. Especially if comments are bad. I think that is why I don’t comment on looks. I comment badly on myself and put myself down to save me getting hurt by others first. Although since my teens I haven’t had much bad stuff said about me. I always think it won’t belong till someone says anything again. Ok so it hurts me when they say bad things, as would it anyone else. So I tend to do it all my self.
Maybe deep down I won’t think someone is attractive or not attractive, but I tend to not let that judge the way they are. As long as they have an outstanding personality and can have a laugh and a joke. It doesn’t bother me. Someone I can get along with means more to me then, do don’t speak to me just look at you.
I guess I have to stop looking for perfection, I can only do the best I can. Spend a little less time questioning things and getting on with just enjoying what comes up. Set myself goals to achieve, rather then look back and what I have done and wonder why I did not do it some other way etc…
I think I have just got into the habit of questioning things in fear of messing up. Which I have anyway in the past so its not working is it.
Well no I am not dead so my life is going pretty well, and yes everything else should be a bonus. This is why if I spend the rest of my life questioning things I won’t get any further in life. This will bring me to what someone else has mentioned in a bit.
I think you are right in what you said, well in away. If I stop looking for perfection life will become perfect. Maybe not perfection, but it might improve.
I question everything I do, I just got into the habit of doing it for some reason. If I questioned things less and just did thing, and let things happen I’d get a lot more done and probably enjoy things more. I think I question things I do to try and get things right and make the best decisions. Looking for perfection rather then taking things as they are. I think if everything did end up “Perfect”, id only question that too. And I would wonder why it is so perfect!
Appearance is something I have never really bothered about, only the way I look. In my eyes im not all that to look at. Many people tell me different and I can’t see what they see. I hate to look in the mirror and I am always been judged my others, I see people get judged by others. Especially if comments are bad. I think that is why I don’t comment on looks. I comment badly on myself and put myself down to save me getting hurt by others first. Although since my teens I haven’t had much bad stuff said about me. I always think it won’t belong till someone says anything again. Ok so it hurts me when they say bad things, as would it anyone else. So I tend to do it all my self.
Maybe deep down I won’t think someone is attractive or not attractive, but I tend to not let that judge the way they are. As long as they have an outstanding personality and can have a laugh and a joke. It doesn’t bother me. Someone I can get along with means more to me then, do don’t speak to me just look at you.
I guess I have to stop looking for perfection, I can only do the best I can. Spend a little less time questioning things and getting on with just enjoying what comes up. Set myself goals to achieve, rather then look back and what I have done and wonder why I did not do it some other way etc…
I think I have just got into the habit of questioning things in fear of messing up. Which I have anyway in the past so its not working is it.
La Flock
Am I happy?
In some ways I am in some ways no.
There are things in my life that are going well, but a lot of things get me down too. Family, relationships, friends etc… the usual.
My son makes me happy though which is brilliant, he is my life.
Things that get me down are improving as we have talked about. Then there is the person that I think a lot of that I think about a lot. Either way I am supposed to be happy. My relationship is going well which is a big change.
I guess like I said there is always something more I want. Does not mean I am ever going to get it.
I’ll talk to you tomorrow about it though if im online and if you are.
Cheers
Am I happy?
In some ways I am in some ways no.
There are things in my life that are going well, but a lot of things get me down too. Family, relationships, friends etc… the usual.
My son makes me happy though which is brilliant, he is my life.
Things that get me down are improving as we have talked about. Then there is the person that I think a lot of that I think about a lot. Either way I am supposed to be happy. My relationship is going well which is a big change.
I guess like I said there is always something more I want. Does not mean I am ever going to get it.
I’ll talk to you tomorrow about it though if im online and if you are.
Cheers
Page: