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"The lifeguard was wetting himself"

I’ve had a dodgy hamstring for around half a year now and have decided that once a week as well as my usual gyming I am going to hit the swimming pool to give it some more gentle exercise.

So, today was the first day, and…I suck.

Can’t do front crawl for a long period of time. Tried doing frog stroke for the first time ever. I am like a frog, not a frog that glides effortlessly through the water, but more a frog that has had its arms and legs pulled of by an evil spotty 12-year-old child.

I also found that these swimming “techniques” I displayed were working my upper body more then my injured hamstring.

So, I got out, walked over to this little rack thing and picked up a bright red float.

I then proceeded to do length after length very slowly while holding a float in my hands. I got overtaken by old people, young people and I think I frog with no arms and legs went past me at one point.

Only two people in the pool used a float. Me, and a 6-year-old having a swimming lesson.

Bloody smug looking lifeguard.

I am a superb front crawl swimmer.

Just while we're on the topic ;)

It wasn't David Hasslehoff, was it?

Haha.

Arrogent lifeguard thinking he's the best.

Couldn't you arrest him for twattish behaviour?

Bloody lifeguard thought so

Well, you gotta laugh at these things haven't you?

Timmargh wrote:
> Ahahahahaha!
>
> I laugh at your physical ineptitude!
>
> Ahahahahaha!

I'm glad I'm of amusement to you.

Breast stroke is good if you get the co-ordination right. Otherwise you will probably flounder.

I love the way you change temperatures.

It's cool.

Ahahahahaha!

I laugh at your physical ineptitude!

Ahahahahaha!

Etc.

Seriously, though, breast stroke is crap unless you're swimming under the water.