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Dedicated to Niddle and his fapping incident, the filthy dawggg.
Sex is the reason every person exists (Unless you are a test tube baby, damn modern science) and is a part of everyday life. Statistically 10,000 are having sex at any one moment in time. Sex isn’t culturally accepted into all cultures but amongst most of us it is an issue that occurs in our everyday lives. Sex is a big thing within the media, newspapers contain sex (Page 3 topless models), on TV (Channel 5, anytime of the day) and the internet (about 1 million porn sites) as well as magazines and many other forms of sex in the media. However one form of media which has barely scratched the surface of sex and they don’t seem to realise just how well it sells. That form of media is the computer games industry, and it is a damn shame.
The few incidences where computer games have included sex and nudity in them, are poor and the public seem to show little interest in them, with the exception of 14 year old boys who ‘aren’t getting any’. If we look at probably the first game with nudity in, it is Duke Nukem with the pixelly-boobed lap dancers in a club. This game was not recognised for its nudity, it was recognised for its bevy of weapons and the fact ‘The Duke’ swore now and again. Another game with nudity included is BMX XXX, a reputedly bad game that sold about 11 copies worldwide. The nudity is pixelly and the animations are jerky. If people bought the game solely because of the ‘XXX’ on the cover, under the illusion it would be like those videos their dad hides behind the sofa, they will be utterly heartbroken.
Tomb Raider is the game that overly aroused a whole generation of 13 year olds, before they realised boobs weren’t octagonal and women don’t make sexual noises every time they jump. The game is probably the only game that sold well because of its sexual nature. Lets face it, not as many people would have bought the game if you played as Larry Croft, a 43-year-old recovering alcoholic from Swansea. The over-sized bosom, hot pants and grunts and groans made the game a classic amongst lonely-hearted chumps who have never seen a real pair of knockers and probably never will.
Dead or Alive: Beach Volleyball is another breast-based extravaganza. The entire game is based around women in bikinis jumping around and jiggling their sexily rendered flesh for all to see. A volleyball game on its own wouldn’t have sold but DOA Beach Volleyball looks promising and despite its sole objective being boobs, it is very fun to play. The animations are of a very high standard and every jiggle and bounce is beautifully executed. The game is fun and sexually oriented, therefore it is a true winner. The game sells because it has sexy bikini girls AND it is fun to play. This is surely a step in the right direction by combining men’s favourite two things, games and gals, and making it all user controlled. If other developers cannot figure out why the game was successful, they are nothing more than monkeys in suits!
The folks who make games have to realise that the audience don’t mind a bit of breast here and a nice behind there, in actual fact we can’t get enough of it if it is done properly. It cannot be just scantily clad women, there has to be some motive for them to be in a state of undress. Action, adventure and sex are what the new generation of gamers demand. If it is just action then the game is a poor rip off of Timesplitters, if the game is just sex then nobody will pay £35 for it when they can get a DVD of the same stuff for £15!
Equilibrium of porn and pistols is a sure selling point that will appeal hugely to hormone stuffed males.
Sex is the reason every person exists (Unless you are a test tube baby, damn modern science) and is a part of everyday life. Statistically 10,000 are having sex at any one moment in time. Sex isn’t culturally accepted into all cultures but amongst most of us it is an issue that occurs in our everyday lives. Sex is a big thing within the media, newspapers contain sex (Page 3 topless models), on TV (Channel 5, anytime of the day) and the internet (about 1 million porn sites) as well as magazines and many other forms of sex in the media. However one form of media which has barely scratched the surface of sex and they don’t seem to realise just how well it sells. That form of media is the computer games industry, and it is a damn shame.
The few incidences where computer games have included sex and nudity in them, are poor and the public seem to show little interest in them, with the exception of 14 year old boys who ‘aren’t getting any’. If we look at probably the first game with nudity in, it is Duke Nukem with the pixelly-boobed lap dancers in a club. This game was not recognised for its nudity, it was recognised for its bevy of weapons and the fact ‘The Duke’ swore now and again. Another game with nudity included is BMX XXX, a reputedly bad game that sold about 11 copies worldwide. The nudity is pixelly and the animations are jerky. If people bought the game solely because of the ‘XXX’ on the cover, under the illusion it would be like those videos their dad hides behind the sofa, they will be utterly heartbroken.
Tomb Raider is the game that overly aroused a whole generation of 13 year olds, before they realised boobs weren’t octagonal and women don’t make sexual noises every time they jump. The game is probably the only game that sold well because of its sexual nature. Lets face it, not as many people would have bought the game if you played as Larry Croft, a 43-year-old recovering alcoholic from Swansea. The over-sized bosom, hot pants and grunts and groans made the game a classic amongst lonely-hearted chumps who have never seen a real pair of knockers and probably never will.
Dead or Alive: Beach Volleyball is another breast-based extravaganza. The entire game is based around women in bikinis jumping around and jiggling their sexily rendered flesh for all to see. A volleyball game on its own wouldn’t have sold but DOA Beach Volleyball looks promising and despite its sole objective being boobs, it is very fun to play. The animations are of a very high standard and every jiggle and bounce is beautifully executed. The game is fun and sexually oriented, therefore it is a true winner. The game sells because it has sexy bikini girls AND it is fun to play. This is surely a step in the right direction by combining men’s favourite two things, games and gals, and making it all user controlled. If other developers cannot figure out why the game was successful, they are nothing more than monkeys in suits!
The folks who make games have to realise that the audience don’t mind a bit of breast here and a nice behind there, in actual fact we can’t get enough of it if it is done properly. It cannot be just scantily clad women, there has to be some motive for them to be in a state of undress. Action, adventure and sex are what the new generation of gamers demand. If it is just action then the game is a poor rip off of Timesplitters, if the game is just sex then nobody will pay £35 for it when they can get a DVD of the same stuff for £15!
Equilibrium of porn and pistols is a sure selling point that will appeal hugely to hormone stuffed males.
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*Girl puts N64 controller on lap*
"I refuse to play violent games like Goldeneye, but... could you just kill me one more time?"
"I refuse to play violent games like Goldeneye, but... could you just kill me one more time?"
With the exception of the porn films that Steve dircts in Vice City, I can't think of much nudity in games. There are a few old games with nudity in, such as 'Sex Olympics', but I don't know much about them, because they wouldn't work on my PC, and wouldn't be much good anyway wih 12-year old graphics.
There's also the game 'Private Dancer', which involves poker as well as stripping women. However, I don't own it because a) I'm 15, and b) I haven't got Kazaa due to numerous security programs.
There's also the game 'Private Dancer', which involves poker as well as stripping women. However, I don't own it because a) I'm 15, and b) I haven't got Kazaa due to numerous security programs.
Oops, meant to have cut ut the top part as well... should have read:
Paradox wrote:
Lets face
> it, not as many people would have bought the game if you played...... from Swansea.
Hey!
Paradox wrote:
Lets face
> it, not as many people would have bought the game if you played...... from Swansea.
Hey!
Paradox: wrote:
>
> Tomb Raider is the game that overly aroused a whole generation of 13
> year olds, before they realised boobs weren’t octagonal and women
> don’t make sexual noises every time they jump. The game is probably
> the only game that sold well because of its sexual nature. Lets face
> it, not as many people would have bought the game if you played...... from Swansea.
Hey!
>
> Tomb Raider is the game that overly aroused a whole generation of 13
> year olds, before they realised boobs weren’t octagonal and women
> don’t make sexual noises every time they jump. The game is probably
> the only game that sold well because of its sexual nature. Lets face
> it, not as many people would have bought the game if you played...... from Swansea.
Hey!
Aoe wrote:
> You forget Virtual Sex... That must have been poor.
*cough*
yeah... bad...
> You forget Virtual Sex... That must have been poor.
*cough*
yeah... bad...
nothing wrong with sex in games, just mainly all aimed at the males. Which has been mentioned before.
sex sells, tomb raider was a bloody good game
You forget Virtual Sex... That must have been poor.
Paradox: wrote:
> heh I haven't heard the word "bummed" for ages :-)
You shouldn't have taken early retirement, then.
A-boom-boom ......... TISH
Ithankyou.
> heh I haven't heard the word "bummed" for ages :-)
You shouldn't have taken early retirement, then.
A-boom-boom ......... TISH
Ithankyou.
You forgot:
1) Taki's rather active and fully erect lady-bumps, SCII. As well as all the other characters.
In fact, I've done much research into Soul Calibur ladies.
In profile mode, using the shoulder buttons to rotate chosen lady, wobble are at their best. You may also notice that Cassandra and her sis are not wearning any support, and their bumps move independently of eachother.
Ahem.
2) Fear Effect. It had nudity AND lesbians. If that's not the greatest way to sell a game, I don't know what is. They were lesbians with guns as well. Naked lesbians with guns.
Ahem.
...
Oh, the shame.
1) Taki's rather active and fully erect lady-bumps, SCII. As well as all the other characters.
In fact, I've done much research into Soul Calibur ladies.
In profile mode, using the shoulder buttons to rotate chosen lady, wobble are at their best. You may also notice that Cassandra and her sis are not wearning any support, and their bumps move independently of eachother.
Ahem.
2) Fear Effect. It had nudity AND lesbians. If that's not the greatest way to sell a game, I don't know what is. They were lesbians with guns as well. Naked lesbians with guns.
Ahem.
...
Oh, the shame.
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