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So, being the morbid git I am I been thinking about suicide. Not considering doing it, just thinking about it, the effects it has and stuff like that. Generally I am a person on the edge who is depressed the vast majority of the time and always looks on the bad side of stuff. Don't try and make this into a cheer-up post because it isn't what I am after, I will just get annoyed. I dont really think anything can change who I am, it is my temprement. I am depressed therefore I am. If you asked when it started I couldnt tell you. I had a happy childhood and was never neglected.
I dont think I ever really fit in with my peers. I have never been a loner, always had friends and tagged along to social gatherings and stuff but always felt pretty out of place. If you knew we you wouldnt be able to tell. On the surface I am pretty outgoing and happy and never really found a way to channel my depression. For a brief stint in my life I talked everything out with my girlfriend, stuff actually seemed good for a few months until without reason she left me, and stuff went to being crap again.
I never really have been able to hold a relationship together. I had a few short relationships with nice enough lasses but I must have done something wrong along the line. Nothing has lasted over a few months, but my friends have long lasting relationships and are all so damn happy.
If you're assuming my depression is relationship stuff then you're wrong. To be honest I dont know what it is, if I knew that then I guess I could begin to sort things out. I'm not someone who enjoys been morbid and depressed constanly, its horrible. Like some depressed people tend to do, I dont blame the world or other people for being depressed. Just am, thats it. It happens. Perhaps its meant to be.
Seems I have really rambled on and chances are the forums are going to brand me a manic depressive psycho but perhaps there is a chance that someone out there can relate to what I am experiencing or maybe help me somehow. Perhaps.
I dont think I ever really fit in with my peers. I have never been a loner, always had friends and tagged along to social gatherings and stuff but always felt pretty out of place. If you knew we you wouldnt be able to tell. On the surface I am pretty outgoing and happy and never really found a way to channel my depression. For a brief stint in my life I talked everything out with my girlfriend, stuff actually seemed good for a few months until without reason she left me, and stuff went to being crap again.
I never really have been able to hold a relationship together. I had a few short relationships with nice enough lasses but I must have done something wrong along the line. Nothing has lasted over a few months, but my friends have long lasting relationships and are all so damn happy.
If you're assuming my depression is relationship stuff then you're wrong. To be honest I dont know what it is, if I knew that then I guess I could begin to sort things out. I'm not someone who enjoys been morbid and depressed constanly, its horrible. Like some depressed people tend to do, I dont blame the world or other people for being depressed. Just am, thats it. It happens. Perhaps its meant to be.
Seems I have really rambled on and chances are the forums are going to brand me a manic depressive psycho but perhaps there is a chance that someone out there can relate to what I am experiencing or maybe help me somehow. Perhaps.
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Memorandum! wrote:
> Seems like you're just being depressed for the sake of it, like all
> those other 'individual' goth losers.
I'm afraid that's an awful, awful generalisation Mr.Memo.
Although saying that, i have noticed the amount of goth/greebo etc kind of people i know being depressed because it seems to be the thing to be these days.
Can't understand it myself but there you go.
> Seems like you're just being depressed for the sake of it, like all
> those other 'individual' goth losers.
I'm afraid that's an awful, awful generalisation Mr.Memo.
Although saying that, i have noticed the amount of goth/greebo etc kind of people i know being depressed because it seems to be the thing to be these days.
Can't understand it myself but there you go.
Memorandum, for those brief moments your head is taken out of your own ass you really do talk some rubbish.
Asher, I've fished out my 'Bette Dayz' album and im listening to the song now.
Asher, I've fished out my 'Bette Dayz' album and im listening to the song now.
"Pray for those better days."
-Tupac Shakur
-Tupac Shakur
Seems like you're just being depressed for the sake of it, like all those other 'individual' goth losers.
So, being the morbid git I am I been thinking about suicide. Not considering doing it, just thinking about it, the effects it has and stuff like that. Generally I am a person on the edge who is depressed the vast majority of the time and always looks on the bad side of stuff. Don't try and make this into a cheer-up post because it isn't what I am after, I will just get annoyed. I dont really think anything can change who I am, it is my temprement. I am depressed therefore I am. If you asked when it started I couldnt tell you. I had a happy childhood and was never neglected.
I dont think I ever really fit in with my peers. I have never been a loner, always had friends and tagged along to social gatherings and stuff but always felt pretty out of place. If you knew we you wouldnt be able to tell. On the surface I am pretty outgoing and happy and never really found a way to channel my depression. For a brief stint in my life I talked everything out with my girlfriend, stuff actually seemed good for a few months until without reason she left me, and stuff went to being crap again.
I never really have been able to hold a relationship together. I had a few short relationships with nice enough lasses but I must have done something wrong along the line. Nothing has lasted over a few months, but my friends have long lasting relationships and are all so damn happy.
If you're assuming my depression is relationship stuff then you're wrong. To be honest I dont know what it is, if I knew that then I guess I could begin to sort things out. I'm not someone who enjoys been morbid and depressed constanly, its horrible. Like some depressed people tend to do, I dont blame the world or other people for being depressed. Just am, thats it. It happens. Perhaps its meant to be.
Seems I have really rambled on and chances are the forums are going to brand me a manic depressive psycho but perhaps there is a chance that someone out there can relate to what I am experiencing or maybe help me somehow. Perhaps.
I dont think I ever really fit in with my peers. I have never been a loner, always had friends and tagged along to social gatherings and stuff but always felt pretty out of place. If you knew we you wouldnt be able to tell. On the surface I am pretty outgoing and happy and never really found a way to channel my depression. For a brief stint in my life I talked everything out with my girlfriend, stuff actually seemed good for a few months until without reason she left me, and stuff went to being crap again.
I never really have been able to hold a relationship together. I had a few short relationships with nice enough lasses but I must have done something wrong along the line. Nothing has lasted over a few months, but my friends have long lasting relationships and are all so damn happy.
If you're assuming my depression is relationship stuff then you're wrong. To be honest I dont know what it is, if I knew that then I guess I could begin to sort things out. I'm not someone who enjoys been morbid and depressed constanly, its horrible. Like some depressed people tend to do, I dont blame the world or other people for being depressed. Just am, thats it. It happens. Perhaps its meant to be.
Seems I have really rambled on and chances are the forums are going to brand me a manic depressive psycho but perhaps there is a chance that someone out there can relate to what I am experiencing or maybe help me somehow. Perhaps.
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