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So, being the morbid git I am I been thinking about suicide. Not considering doing it, just thinking about it, the effects it has and stuff like that. Generally I am a person on the edge who is depressed the vast majority of the time and always looks on the bad side of stuff. Don't try and make this into a cheer-up post because it isn't what I am after, I will just get annoyed. I dont really think anything can change who I am, it is my temprement. I am depressed therefore I am. If you asked when it started I couldnt tell you. I had a happy childhood and was never neglected.
I dont think I ever really fit in with my peers. I have never been a loner, always had friends and tagged along to social gatherings and stuff but always felt pretty out of place. If you knew we you wouldnt be able to tell. On the surface I am pretty outgoing and happy and never really found a way to channel my depression. For a brief stint in my life I talked everything out with my girlfriend, stuff actually seemed good for a few months until without reason she left me, and stuff went to being crap again.
I never really have been able to hold a relationship together. I had a few short relationships with nice enough lasses but I must have done something wrong along the line. Nothing has lasted over a few months, but my friends have long lasting relationships and are all so damn happy.
If you're assuming my depression is relationship stuff then you're wrong. To be honest I dont know what it is, if I knew that then I guess I could begin to sort things out. I'm not someone who enjoys been morbid and depressed constanly, its horrible. Like some depressed people tend to do, I dont blame the world or other people for being depressed. Just am, thats it. It happens. Perhaps its meant to be.
Seems I have really rambled on and chances are the forums are going to brand me a manic depressive psycho but perhaps there is a chance that someone out there can relate to what I am experiencing or maybe help me somehow. Perhaps.
I dont think I ever really fit in with my peers. I have never been a loner, always had friends and tagged along to social gatherings and stuff but always felt pretty out of place. If you knew we you wouldnt be able to tell. On the surface I am pretty outgoing and happy and never really found a way to channel my depression. For a brief stint in my life I talked everything out with my girlfriend, stuff actually seemed good for a few months until without reason she left me, and stuff went to being crap again.
I never really have been able to hold a relationship together. I had a few short relationships with nice enough lasses but I must have done something wrong along the line. Nothing has lasted over a few months, but my friends have long lasting relationships and are all so damn happy.
If you're assuming my depression is relationship stuff then you're wrong. To be honest I dont know what it is, if I knew that then I guess I could begin to sort things out. I'm not someone who enjoys been morbid and depressed constanly, its horrible. Like some depressed people tend to do, I dont blame the world or other people for being depressed. Just am, thats it. It happens. Perhaps its meant to be.
Seems I have really rambled on and chances are the forums are going to brand me a manic depressive psycho but perhaps there is a chance that someone out there can relate to what I am experiencing or maybe help me somehow. Perhaps.
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Cheers Non Existant.
Mindfrig wrote:
Generally I am a person on the edge who is depressed
> the vast majority of the time and always looks on the bad side of
> stuff.
I can relate to this. I do have a problem of looking on the bad side of things, comliments and good comments people make about me go over my head and i tend to rubbish them. I's also terribly paranoid, however there is a reason for that, which i know of.
>
> I dont think I ever really fit in with my peers. I have never been a
> loner, always had friends and tagged along to social gatherings and
> stuff but always felt pretty out of place.
Very similar to me too. I do have a fairly decent social life (he says posting on the internet on a saturday night!) however i never feel comfortable with people around me and often feel week. I guess i take things far too seriously for my age, which also messes up any potential relationships of any note (never have got past a few months in any cases)
I just think it's the way you are as the title suggests. But there are always suprises in life, as i've found out from my experiences that are worth waking up in the morning for.
And if you ever feel down - look around you, there's an awful lot of people with bad problems and cr@ppy lives, if you put it into perspective then you terminate thoughts of suicide and realise how much of a lucky person you are.
Generally I am a person on the edge who is depressed
> the vast majority of the time and always looks on the bad side of
> stuff.
I can relate to this. I do have a problem of looking on the bad side of things, comliments and good comments people make about me go over my head and i tend to rubbish them. I's also terribly paranoid, however there is a reason for that, which i know of.
>
> I dont think I ever really fit in with my peers. I have never been a
> loner, always had friends and tagged along to social gatherings and
> stuff but always felt pretty out of place.
Very similar to me too. I do have a fairly decent social life (he says posting on the internet on a saturday night!) however i never feel comfortable with people around me and often feel week. I guess i take things far too seriously for my age, which also messes up any potential relationships of any note (never have got past a few months in any cases)
I just think it's the way you are as the title suggests. But there are always suprises in life, as i've found out from my experiences that are worth waking up in the morning for.
And if you ever feel down - look around you, there's an awful lot of people with bad problems and cr@ppy lives, if you put it into perspective then you terminate thoughts of suicide and realise how much of a lucky person you are.
Non-existant wrote:
> I was refering to the fact that you accused Mindfrig of being another
> one of these goth people - i get the impression he isn't, and that
> not every goth is like this.
Fair enough, I just thought the post fitted in with the goth culture perfectly. And whether every goth is like that or not is debatable...it's hard to find a goth who doesn't act depressed, because they're basically social outcasts within their little clans if they aren't morbid and depresing.
> In my view depression is far too overused in our language
I agree wholeheartedly.
> I was refering to the fact that you accused Mindfrig of being another
> one of these goth people - i get the impression he isn't, and that
> not every goth is like this.
Fair enough, I just thought the post fitted in with the goth culture perfectly. And whether every goth is like that or not is debatable...it's hard to find a goth who doesn't act depressed, because they're basically social outcasts within their little clans if they aren't morbid and depresing.
> In my view depression is far too overused in our language
I agree wholeheartedly.
Memorandum! wrote:
> Non-existant wrote:
> Memorandum! wrote:
> Seems like you're just being depressed for the sake of it, like all
> those other 'individual' goth losers.
>
> I'm afraid that's an awful, awful generalisation Mr.Memo.
>
> Although saying that, i have noticed the amount of goth/greebo etc
> kind of people i know being depressed because it seems to be the
> thing to be these days.
>
> Exactly, so what's so awful about it?
> It seems like the 'in' thing to be exactly the same as every other
> goth, then claim you're expressing your 'individualism' by being
> constantly 'depressed' and dressing the same.
I was refering to the fact that you accused Mindfrig of being another one of these goth people - i get the impression he isn't, and that not every goth is like this.
In my view depression is far too overused in our language, those who claim to be depressed, have they ever *actually* been depressed before? I sincerely doubt it, its more likely they going through a brief hard time or are feeling down the the dumps. (Not accusing you of being like this Mindfrig).
> Non-existant wrote:
> Memorandum! wrote:
> Seems like you're just being depressed for the sake of it, like all
> those other 'individual' goth losers.
>
> I'm afraid that's an awful, awful generalisation Mr.Memo.
>
> Although saying that, i have noticed the amount of goth/greebo etc
> kind of people i know being depressed because it seems to be the
> thing to be these days.
>
> Exactly, so what's so awful about it?
> It seems like the 'in' thing to be exactly the same as every other
> goth, then claim you're expressing your 'individualism' by being
> constantly 'depressed' and dressing the same.
I was refering to the fact that you accused Mindfrig of being another one of these goth people - i get the impression he isn't, and that not every goth is like this.
In my view depression is far too overused in our language, those who claim to be depressed, have they ever *actually* been depressed before? I sincerely doubt it, its more likely they going through a brief hard time or are feeling down the the dumps. (Not accusing you of being like this Mindfrig).
Mindfrig wrote:
>
>
> Asher, I've fished out my 'Bette Dayz' album and im listening to the
> song now.
Excellent.
Also listen to My Block to see just how lucky you are to have a life like yours.
>
>
> Asher, I've fished out my 'Bette Dayz' album and im listening to the
> song now.
Excellent.
Also listen to My Block to see just how lucky you are to have a life like yours.
Mindfrig wrote:
> And just to clear stuff up, I am not a goth. I dont dress in black
> curtains and I dont listen to music where the singers just grunt and
> vomit on the microphone.
Okay. At least that's something.
I just assumed because your post fitted in perfectly with the goth culture.
> And just to clear stuff up, I am not a goth. I dont dress in black
> curtains and I dont listen to music where the singers just grunt and
> vomit on the microphone.
Okay. At least that's something.
I just assumed because your post fitted in perfectly with the goth culture.
No, I think you're depressed because you're depressed at being depressed over being depressed.
If that makes any sense.
If that makes any sense.
And just to clear stuff up, I am not a goth. I dont dress in black curtains and I dont listen to music where the singers just grunt and vomit on the microphone.
You seriously think I just sit here being depressed for a joke, just for the sake of it?
Perhaps subconciously there is no reason for it and societys blandness has rubbed off on me but I dont try to be depressed. I am sure there is some reason I just cant figure it out yet.
Perhaps subconciously there is no reason for it and societys blandness has rubbed off on me but I dont try to be depressed. I am sure there is some reason I just cant figure it out yet.
Non-existant wrote:
> Memorandum! wrote:
> Seems like you're just being depressed for the sake of it, like all
> those other 'individual' goth losers.
>
> I'm afraid that's an awful, awful generalisation Mr.Memo.
>
> Although saying that, i have noticed the amount of goth/greebo etc
> kind of people i know being depressed because it seems to be the
> thing to be these days.
Exactly, so what's so awful about it?
It seems like the 'in' thing to be exactly the same as every other goth, then claim you're expressing your 'individualism' by being constantly 'depressed' and dressing the same.
And seriously, come on, Mindfrig. In that post you basically denied any reasons for you being depressed, yet claim you always are. To me that looks like being depressed for no apparent reason, and therefore, being depressed...to be depressed.
> Memorandum! wrote:
> Seems like you're just being depressed for the sake of it, like all
> those other 'individual' goth losers.
>
> I'm afraid that's an awful, awful generalisation Mr.Memo.
>
> Although saying that, i have noticed the amount of goth/greebo etc
> kind of people i know being depressed because it seems to be the
> thing to be these days.
Exactly, so what's so awful about it?
It seems like the 'in' thing to be exactly the same as every other goth, then claim you're expressing your 'individualism' by being constantly 'depressed' and dressing the same.
And seriously, come on, Mindfrig. In that post you basically denied any reasons for you being depressed, yet claim you always are. To me that looks like being depressed for no apparent reason, and therefore, being depressed...to be depressed.
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