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The campaign of chucking every spider I see through the window has been a long, laborious and often petrifying affair, but it seems to be working.
New problem:
The house is filling up with flies. There are two in the room with the computer (where I am now), one in my bedroom, and at least 3 in the kitchen.
Unlike spiders, they can fly (no sh**!), and they're quick - too quick to catch. Meaning I'm at their mercy.
Fortunately they're also unlike spiders in the fact that they don't try to kill you, or worse crawl across your face, while you sleep, so at the moment we're getting along fairly well.
The one in my bedroom seemed fairly polite, until he got a bit too bold and buzzed around my face - though that didn't last. I think we bonded.
But will the house's fly population follow a 'boom-bust' pattern, or will it rise forever, until it reaches a plateau where it's just not possible to fit any more flies in?
Even if I'm to be saved by the boom-bust distribution, at their peak I could be inhaling 7 flies with every breath.
If you've ever been cycling with your mouth open you'll know why this scares me.
Yep, I'm very much a one-fly-man, and while I can tolerate the other 5 (jealous) flies for now, inevitably the fly population will spiral out of all control, driving me from my home.
And all because I chucked a bunch of spiders out of the window.
Don't be a fool, don't go the same way I did. Mother Nature knows better than you ever will, and if she says the spiders are in then so it must be.
You've been warned.
New problem:
The house is filling up with flies. There are two in the room with the computer (where I am now), one in my bedroom, and at least 3 in the kitchen.
Unlike spiders, they can fly (no sh**!), and they're quick - too quick to catch. Meaning I'm at their mercy.
Fortunately they're also unlike spiders in the fact that they don't try to kill you, or worse crawl across your face, while you sleep, so at the moment we're getting along fairly well.
The one in my bedroom seemed fairly polite, until he got a bit too bold and buzzed around my face - though that didn't last. I think we bonded.
But will the house's fly population follow a 'boom-bust' pattern, or will it rise forever, until it reaches a plateau where it's just not possible to fit any more flies in?
Even if I'm to be saved by the boom-bust distribution, at their peak I could be inhaling 7 flies with every breath.
If you've ever been cycling with your mouth open you'll know why this scares me.
Yep, I'm very much a one-fly-man, and while I can tolerate the other 5 (jealous) flies for now, inevitably the fly population will spiral out of all control, driving me from my home.
And all because I chucked a bunch of spiders out of the window.
Don't be a fool, don't go the same way I did. Mother Nature knows better than you ever will, and if she says the spiders are in then so it must be.
You've been warned.
Page:
The trick with daddy longs legs is to catch them and pull off all their legs. Then when they try to fly their can't steer!
Didn't Ricky Jervais do some sort of skit about Daddy Long Legs? They're poisonous but their mouths are too small to bite you and anyway, if they try and attack you their legs will fall off.
Obviously my rendition made it sound funnier than it actually was but it was quite funny all the same.
Obviously my rendition made it sound funnier than it actually was but it was quite funny all the same.
You may gloat over your masterful fly-killing skills, but against Daddy Long Legs you would quake with fear!
best thing to kill flies is a common tea-towl. use it in a whipping motion (as though you're snapping it at someones ass), and most of the time, they don't see it coming.
of course, don't use this technique when flies are on your mums best china.
of course, don't use this technique when flies are on your mums best china.
I like to catch the flies and then throw them at the floor, whilst unconscience i then stick them on the hob and put the gas on, they usually roast to death before they wake up.
The heat makes their wings glow.
The heat makes their wings glow.
*Buy
By a fly swatter.
SHEEPY wrote:
> The sagacious one wrote:
> >
> Dump on my bed gets you dead.
>
> *Remembers story of your mates in Thailand*
Dump on your own bed, weak in the head.
> The sagacious one wrote:
> >
> Dump on my bed gets you dead.
>
> *Remembers story of your mates in Thailand*
Dump on your own bed, weak in the head.
The sagacious one wrote:
>>
> Dump on my bed gets you dead.
*Remembers story of your mates in Thailand*
>>
> Dump on my bed gets you dead.
*Remembers story of your mates in Thailand*
Black Glove wrote:
> The sagacious one wrote:
> I've experienced an infestation (in my flat) and we had to resort to
> those hideous glue traps.
>
> Glue traps? Surely you jest. Only a psychopathic rat-catcher could
> invent such a devilish utensil.
terrible invention. Strip of card with daemon glue that sticks to anything. Rolf Harris cries everytime one of them is deployed. I hated myself for whacking the mice but they were dumping on our food, microwave, cooker and probably, beds.
Dump on my bed gets you dead.
> The sagacious one wrote:
> I've experienced an infestation (in my flat) and we had to resort to
> those hideous glue traps.
>
> Glue traps? Surely you jest. Only a psychopathic rat-catcher could
> invent such a devilish utensil.
terrible invention. Strip of card with daemon glue that sticks to anything. Rolf Harris cries everytime one of them is deployed. I hated myself for whacking the mice but they were dumping on our food, microwave, cooker and probably, beds.
Dump on my bed gets you dead.
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