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“DESTINATION UNKNOWN…RUBY RUBY RUBY RUBY SOHO!” Anarchy’s new music hits. Rancid’s Ruby Soho is available from a KaZaA near your.
Anar-cane, as he gets called now, steps out from under the SpecialTron. And it’s no surprise that he’s being booed to hell and back. The crowd are really giving Anarchy some heat. He doesn’t care. The fans in the front row are trying to touch Anarchy, yet they booed him seconds earlier. Anarchy tells them where to go, and continues down to the ring. He walks around it once, before stepping into the ring.
He takes a mic, and stands there looking around for a good 30 seconds whilst the crowd chant “Anarchy sucks…”
“Chant all you want, I’ve got all day…”
This only makes the crowd boo louder.
“You’re all the same. Canadians, all cowards; all backstabbers. But, that isn’t why I’m here.You all just saw what happened. You just saw Reaver...sorry, Reaver the Dirty Dancing Diva...making an ass of himself. That was entertainment. But he enjoyed it? I don't understand why he done it...but, whatever floats his boat. I joined SR just over 6 months ago, and Reaver has CONSTANTLY been a pain in Anarchy's ass...and thorn in Anarchy's thigh. He has never given me a chance to prove myself. Wow, a one-on-one match with his little run-in buddy Jetster, or a few matches with Batista."
The crowd boo loudly. Anarchy goes to leave the ring, much to the delight of the crowd, but he stops and gets back in.
"I'm not going anywhere. I understand that Reaver has his own problems, and it’ll be hassle-free if he simply listens to me. BUT...I'm gunna begin by addressing the Hurricane.
“STAND BACK, THERE’S A HURRICANE COMING THROUGH!” Hurricane’s music hits, and Parental Advisory come out onto the stage. Josh Matthews, Too Cool and of course, Hurricane himself. They slowly strut to the ring; the crowd love them! Helms gets into the ring first. The other guys follow behind.
“Hey hey, I asked for Hurricane. Damn you guys. Anyway, you’re probably wondering why I’ve called you out. Shane...you’re Cruiserweight Champion. You’re Cruiserweight Champion damnit! Parental Advisory have got an over the top rope elimination match tonight, and you’re going in as the Cruiserweight king, the best of the cruiserweights. You know what that means?”
“N…”
“Yes, you do. I expect you to win tonight. I expect you to go out there and represent Team Anarchy. But, you’re not gunna win, as you haven’t been ruffed up by anyone yet. You’ve had it easy. When you’ve been beaten, you’ll get be…”
“Citizen Anarchy, I appreciate your concern for TEAM PARENTAL ADVISORY, but this is going nowhere. You know what I think?”
“Well, what do you th…”
“IT DOESN’T MATTER WHAT I THINK! Yes, I can steal The Rock’s lines too. Brother. Y’see, you never listen to us. Josh is Hardcore material, and Too Cool should be getting tag shots by now. But no, you’re a self centred little SOB who’s taking all the shots. Once you've used us...once you've used us Anarchy, you're gunna go on an become the next SRW Champion. Yet you can't do it alone. You need us."
Anarchy shakes his head in disagreement.
"Anarchy, I spoke to Citizen Reaver and got you suspended. Why? Because you’re a total ass and because you cheated in your tag team match at Free-Fall. You used a weapon; superheroes don’t use weapons. Hurricane is taking over Parental Advisory, and rest assured, when you are fit enough to return, you’re gunna be surrounded by superheroes galore, as Too Cool and Josh are my first EVER S.H.Í.T.’s. Superheroes in Training.”
“Hurricane…if I'm not a superhero...I must be...a supervillain! You can all be S.H.Í.T.'s, but you'll never be as classy as the Anar-cane. Helms, you need to be taught respect. I am a 2 time E!W champion damnit.”
"And let's face it, that's not hard. I was speaking to Citizen DW over at Edge!Wrestling, he wants to make an SRW return soon, by the way, and he says the E!W roster is far to easy. He's been E!W champion for over a year now!"
"See Hurricane, you have no damn respect. I'm gunna teach you some lessons, old school!"
WHAM. Anarchy just smashed the mic over the head of Hurricane. He picks him up…EXPLICIT LYRICS! EXPLICIT LYRICS BY ANARCHY! The rest of PA can only watch in horror.
“That’s called tough love, Shane.”
Too Cool and Josh help Hurricane out of the ring and to the back.
“Yeah, go on, leave. Leave you bástárds. That brings me onto Reaver. You’ve sorted out only one of your problems, and boy, it’s gunna come back to haunt you. Nobody suspends Anarchy. Nobody with half a brain cell suspends their top draw. But I enjoy watching you suffer. I’ll be back at the PPV. And I damn well expect to have a title shot. I beat you, and proved myself. You have five top athletes wanting that CAW Title. Hawk, Cong Man, Scotty Dogg, you and me. And we all deserve a title shot. So, after a lot of thinking…we need a BIG match at the PPV…a big match with us five and the champ in. A six-man match. A six-man elimination match. AN ELIMINATION CHAMBER MATCH! Reaver, hear me out. You’ll make money. Lots of it. Think about it; if I’m in the match, you’ll make big bucks. Lots of 0’s. So how about it Reaver? How about it? Peace out.”
Ruby Soho plays, as Anarchy leaves. He’ll no doubt be here for the massive eight-man tag match tonight, but after that, we won’t see him on our SRW screens for at least 3 weeks. Wow.
-----------------
Got to go now, I'll be back later with the moral of this promo and the bit that I always write saying "Crap promo blah". Cya.
Anar-cane, as he gets called now, steps out from under the SpecialTron. And it’s no surprise that he’s being booed to hell and back. The crowd are really giving Anarchy some heat. He doesn’t care. The fans in the front row are trying to touch Anarchy, yet they booed him seconds earlier. Anarchy tells them where to go, and continues down to the ring. He walks around it once, before stepping into the ring.
He takes a mic, and stands there looking around for a good 30 seconds whilst the crowd chant “Anarchy sucks…”
“Chant all you want, I’ve got all day…”
This only makes the crowd boo louder.
“You’re all the same. Canadians, all cowards; all backstabbers. But, that isn’t why I’m here.You all just saw what happened. You just saw Reaver...sorry, Reaver the Dirty Dancing Diva...making an ass of himself. That was entertainment. But he enjoyed it? I don't understand why he done it...but, whatever floats his boat. I joined SR just over 6 months ago, and Reaver has CONSTANTLY been a pain in Anarchy's ass...and thorn in Anarchy's thigh. He has never given me a chance to prove myself. Wow, a one-on-one match with his little run-in buddy Jetster, or a few matches with Batista."
The crowd boo loudly. Anarchy goes to leave the ring, much to the delight of the crowd, but he stops and gets back in.
"I'm not going anywhere. I understand that Reaver has his own problems, and it’ll be hassle-free if he simply listens to me. BUT...I'm gunna begin by addressing the Hurricane.
“STAND BACK, THERE’S A HURRICANE COMING THROUGH!” Hurricane’s music hits, and Parental Advisory come out onto the stage. Josh Matthews, Too Cool and of course, Hurricane himself. They slowly strut to the ring; the crowd love them! Helms gets into the ring first. The other guys follow behind.
“Hey hey, I asked for Hurricane. Damn you guys. Anyway, you’re probably wondering why I’ve called you out. Shane...you’re Cruiserweight Champion. You’re Cruiserweight Champion damnit! Parental Advisory have got an over the top rope elimination match tonight, and you’re going in as the Cruiserweight king, the best of the cruiserweights. You know what that means?”
“N…”
“Yes, you do. I expect you to win tonight. I expect you to go out there and represent Team Anarchy. But, you’re not gunna win, as you haven’t been ruffed up by anyone yet. You’ve had it easy. When you’ve been beaten, you’ll get be…”
“Citizen Anarchy, I appreciate your concern for TEAM PARENTAL ADVISORY, but this is going nowhere. You know what I think?”
“Well, what do you th…”
“IT DOESN’T MATTER WHAT I THINK! Yes, I can steal The Rock’s lines too. Brother. Y’see, you never listen to us. Josh is Hardcore material, and Too Cool should be getting tag shots by now. But no, you’re a self centred little SOB who’s taking all the shots. Once you've used us...once you've used us Anarchy, you're gunna go on an become the next SRW Champion. Yet you can't do it alone. You need us."
Anarchy shakes his head in disagreement.
"Anarchy, I spoke to Citizen Reaver and got you suspended. Why? Because you’re a total ass and because you cheated in your tag team match at Free-Fall. You used a weapon; superheroes don’t use weapons. Hurricane is taking over Parental Advisory, and rest assured, when you are fit enough to return, you’re gunna be surrounded by superheroes galore, as Too Cool and Josh are my first EVER S.H.Í.T.’s. Superheroes in Training.”
“Hurricane…if I'm not a superhero...I must be...a supervillain! You can all be S.H.Í.T.'s, but you'll never be as classy as the Anar-cane. Helms, you need to be taught respect. I am a 2 time E!W champion damnit.”
"And let's face it, that's not hard. I was speaking to Citizen DW over at Edge!Wrestling, he wants to make an SRW return soon, by the way, and he says the E!W roster is far to easy. He's been E!W champion for over a year now!"
"See Hurricane, you have no damn respect. I'm gunna teach you some lessons, old school!"
WHAM. Anarchy just smashed the mic over the head of Hurricane. He picks him up…EXPLICIT LYRICS! EXPLICIT LYRICS BY ANARCHY! The rest of PA can only watch in horror.
“That’s called tough love, Shane.”
Too Cool and Josh help Hurricane out of the ring and to the back.
“Yeah, go on, leave. Leave you bástárds. That brings me onto Reaver. You’ve sorted out only one of your problems, and boy, it’s gunna come back to haunt you. Nobody suspends Anarchy. Nobody with half a brain cell suspends their top draw. But I enjoy watching you suffer. I’ll be back at the PPV. And I damn well expect to have a title shot. I beat you, and proved myself. You have five top athletes wanting that CAW Title. Hawk, Cong Man, Scotty Dogg, you and me. And we all deserve a title shot. So, after a lot of thinking…we need a BIG match at the PPV…a big match with us five and the champ in. A six-man match. A six-man elimination match. AN ELIMINATION CHAMBER MATCH! Reaver, hear me out. You’ll make money. Lots of it. Think about it; if I’m in the match, you’ll make big bucks. Lots of 0’s. So how about it Reaver? How about it? Peace out.”
Ruby Soho plays, as Anarchy leaves. He’ll no doubt be here for the massive eight-man tag match tonight, but after that, we won’t see him on our SRW screens for at least 3 weeks. Wow.
-----------------
Got to go now, I'll be back later with the moral of this promo and the bit that I always write saying "Crap promo blah". Cya.
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Oh and crap promo
:)
:)
Gary is ghey ok?
Anarchy sucks! End.Of.Story.
You've asked Starlight to carry you through SRW? You wanna be his run-in buddy. If he wants a future in SRW, he needs to stay well clear of you. :c)
Anarchy is the future World Champion damnit.
Anarchy is the future World Champion damnit.
Shut your damn mouth! :P If starlight says yes to something Anarchy is gonna get that ass whooped! I'll say it again - WHOOPED!
When I wrote Shane, I was of course referring to the great Shane 'Hurricane' Helms.
Oh...and Lipe...
Just. Bring. It.
Oh...and Lipe...
Just. Bring. It.
A suspended wrestler in the main event of the PPV where he is return...and he wins the gold too.
Hmmm, trying to stack the deck against the champ eh? We'll have to see what Reaver says on that matter. A suspended wrestler in the main event? :D
Grandprix will reveal his thoughts on everything later...
Grandprix will reveal his thoughts on everything later...
6 Man man elimination chamber match eh? Good stuff but god damn it DW, stop using the rock's lines!
Scott is ghey.
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