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"American Troops Encounter Iraqi Mimes"

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Fri 28/03/03 at 14:05
Regular
Posts: 787
Early reports are coming in from Iraq, suggesting that America's progress has been brought to a dramatic halt with the discovery of Iraqi mime fields, blocking the path to Baghdad.

"For as far as the eye can see there are men dressed entirely in black and white. Their faces are painted white, except for black star shapes around the eyes. They've built an invisible wall right around the perimeter of the city, it appears." Said Lt Col Hank Chuggins, via a poor quality radio link.

He continued: "Some of the mimes also appear to be trapped in small boxes. We believe these to be rebel Iraqi mimes, but in their uprising against Saddam they have been imprisoned by these evil mimes."

Back in the USA George W. Bush is working with his top generals to find a way around this invisible wall. He is reluctant to allow his troops to approach it, in case it has invisible gun turrets, or is protected by invisible tanks. It is also believed that the mimes are capable of reincarnation. It was reported that there was a scuffle between some of the mimes, with one firing an invisible gun at the other. The shot mime clutched his chest, before falling dramatically. Only minutes later he rose to his feet, and appear fine, apart from being a little disorientated, placing his hands along the invisible wall, as if unaware that he had previously built it.

In other news plans for a new, even more powerful Death Star have been discovered. During the routine strip search a piece of rolled up paper was spotted, help firmly betwixt the buttocks of a captured Iraqi soldier. Once it was removed the shocking truth was revealed. Iraq have plans for the biggest weapon of mass destruction imaginable.

"We didn't even know about Iraq's space program, but now it appears that they are building this huge killer satellite in the depths of space. It's not just a threat to world peace, or just a threat to the world. It's a threat to my damn fine hair, and my presentable tie." Said Tony Blair, shocked by the discovery.

With this armoured space station they could easily wipe out the entire USA. The only thing that has stopped them so far is that it would also wipe out Iraq. It's quite possible that many of Saddam's palaces are also giant space ships though, and he was probably planning to fly all of these to a safe spot, in Mars or somewhere, before destroying the whole of Earth.

Reports that a team of oil rig workers are being readied to tackle this threat have yet to be confirmed.
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Fri 28/03/03 at 14:05
Regular
"not dead"
Posts: 11,145
Early reports are coming in from Iraq, suggesting that America's progress has been brought to a dramatic halt with the discovery of Iraqi mime fields, blocking the path to Baghdad.

"For as far as the eye can see there are men dressed entirely in black and white. Their faces are painted white, except for black star shapes around the eyes. They've built an invisible wall right around the perimeter of the city, it appears." Said Lt Col Hank Chuggins, via a poor quality radio link.

He continued: "Some of the mimes also appear to be trapped in small boxes. We believe these to be rebel Iraqi mimes, but in their uprising against Saddam they have been imprisoned by these evil mimes."

Back in the USA George W. Bush is working with his top generals to find a way around this invisible wall. He is reluctant to allow his troops to approach it, in case it has invisible gun turrets, or is protected by invisible tanks. It is also believed that the mimes are capable of reincarnation. It was reported that there was a scuffle between some of the mimes, with one firing an invisible gun at the other. The shot mime clutched his chest, before falling dramatically. Only minutes later he rose to his feet, and appear fine, apart from being a little disorientated, placing his hands along the invisible wall, as if unaware that he had previously built it.

In other news plans for a new, even more powerful Death Star have been discovered. During the routine strip search a piece of rolled up paper was spotted, help firmly betwixt the buttocks of a captured Iraqi soldier. Once it was removed the shocking truth was revealed. Iraq have plans for the biggest weapon of mass destruction imaginable.

"We didn't even know about Iraq's space program, but now it appears that they are building this huge killer satellite in the depths of space. It's not just a threat to world peace, or just a threat to the world. It's a threat to my damn fine hair, and my presentable tie." Said Tony Blair, shocked by the discovery.

With this armoured space station they could easily wipe out the entire USA. The only thing that has stopped them so far is that it would also wipe out Iraq. It's quite possible that many of Saddam's palaces are also giant space ships though, and he was probably planning to fly all of these to a safe spot, in Mars or somewhere, before destroying the whole of Earth.

Reports that a team of oil rig workers are being readied to tackle this threat have yet to be confirmed.

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