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From another board, where a thread was discussing the superhuman strength posessed by people afflicted with Downs Syndrome.
Now...I post this purely as demonstrate of the writing ability of people over the internet. The mental pictures are conveyed perfectly.
We pick up the story after it describes how one "special person" (tard in the American slang, where this board is based) went to the same school as the poster..
----
“flash forward to a peaceful day with nothing going on. my friend paul tells this story better than i, but here goes. paul was sitting in study hall minding his own business, probably finishing up some homework he neglected the night before, when the door to the tard classroom opens. there stands alan (previously mentioned padded room tard) and his two escorts. they transport this fella kinda like i imagine maximum security inmates get transported, minus the shackles and men carrying shotguns. i don't know what triggered the reaction but he flipped out.
well he turned on the tard strength and easily broke free of the escorts and went bounding across the room. the way paul tells is there was much screaming and scurrying about during this period. as paul thought about getting up, alan springs onto pauls table like some retarded wild predator animal. paul, knowing that wild animals can sense fear, remains motionless frozen in that "yeah, i'm still doing homework" pose. apparently alan snorted and sniffed, moving his head ever closer to motionless paul.
by this time the room has been completely evacuated minus paul and the two overpowered escorts. picture the scene from alien where the alien head inches closer and closer, drool and slime just dripping away..thats pretty much how this encounter went with paul just sitting there terrified to move. i honestly think if he had blinked his life would have been over in that instant. for whatever reason, alan broke off his assault and let his captors regain control of him. i think he started missing his padded room or something, i'm not really sure. i'm sure if paul posted here this would have easily been his addition to the 'scariest moments in your life' thread.
i guess the moral of the story is: like the ocean and mother nature in general, never underestimate the power of raw tard strength.”
Now...I post this purely as demonstrate of the writing ability of people over the internet. The mental pictures are conveyed perfectly.
We pick up the story after it describes how one "special person" (tard in the American slang, where this board is based) went to the same school as the poster..
----
“flash forward to a peaceful day with nothing going on. my friend paul tells this story better than i, but here goes. paul was sitting in study hall minding his own business, probably finishing up some homework he neglected the night before, when the door to the tard classroom opens. there stands alan (previously mentioned padded room tard) and his two escorts. they transport this fella kinda like i imagine maximum security inmates get transported, minus the shackles and men carrying shotguns. i don't know what triggered the reaction but he flipped out.
well he turned on the tard strength and easily broke free of the escorts and went bounding across the room. the way paul tells is there was much screaming and scurrying about during this period. as paul thought about getting up, alan springs onto pauls table like some retarded wild predator animal. paul, knowing that wild animals can sense fear, remains motionless frozen in that "yeah, i'm still doing homework" pose. apparently alan snorted and sniffed, moving his head ever closer to motionless paul.
by this time the room has been completely evacuated minus paul and the two overpowered escorts. picture the scene from alien where the alien head inches closer and closer, drool and slime just dripping away..thats pretty much how this encounter went with paul just sitting there terrified to move. i honestly think if he had blinked his life would have been over in that instant. for whatever reason, alan broke off his assault and let his captors regain control of him. i think he started missing his padded room or something, i'm not really sure. i'm sure if paul posted here this would have easily been his addition to the 'scariest moments in your life' thread.
i guess the moral of the story is: like the ocean and mother nature in general, never underestimate the power of raw tard strength.”
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Small things capture light minds...
When I was a wee nipper our “local learning difficulties lad” used to terrorise us with his inhuman strength. He was a walking clamp stand.
In truth, playing games like pick-up Bulldog with him was probably not the wisest of ideas but we were kids and just wanted everyone to join in. Also there was the addictive fear factor; that sheer terror that enveloped both body and mind when you thought about the possibility of being caught by him and having his steely arms wrap around you and crush the life out of your feeble body with insidious power and unrelenting ferocity.
Now if was given a choice, I’d take my chances in the gape of a Great White or entombed within the boot of a car in a crusher, rather than be embraced by that wrap of death again.
In truth, playing games like pick-up Bulldog with him was probably not the wisest of ideas but we were kids and just wanted everyone to join in. Also there was the addictive fear factor; that sheer terror that enveloped both body and mind when you thought about the possibility of being caught by him and having his steely arms wrap around you and crush the life out of your feeble body with insidious power and unrelenting ferocity.
Now if was given a choice, I’d take my chances in the gape of a Great White or entombed within the boot of a car in a crusher, rather than be embraced by that wrap of death again.
"paul, knowing that wild animals can sense fear, remains motionless frozen in that "yeah, i'm still doing homework" pose."
I found that line the funniest one in the whole thing.
I found that line the funniest one in the whole thing.
cookie monster wrote:
>stalked by a sock puppet.
That would scare the faecal solids out of me.
>stalked by a sock puppet.
That would scare the faecal solids out of me.
PsychoticKiller wrote:
> HAHHAHAH That the Same thing as the Ride in Universal In Florida,
> Orlando(U.S) Called ENCOUNTER. an alien is Let lose in a room of your
> other riders and it starts running around killing people. wooooo! lots
> of fun.
That thing is crap. I would have been more afraid if i was being stalked by a sock puppet.
> HAHHAHAH That the Same thing as the Ride in Universal In Florida,
> Orlando(U.S) Called ENCOUNTER. an alien is Let lose in a room of your
> other riders and it starts running around killing people. wooooo! lots
> of fun.
That thing is crap. I would have been more afraid if i was being stalked by a sock puppet.
I'm with goatboy on this one, the mental picture it created was perfect.
Probably a bit cruel, but very funny.
Probably a bit cruel, but very funny.
HAHHAHAH That the Same thing as the Ride in Universal In Florida, Orlando(U.S) Called ENCOUNTER. an alien is Let lose in a room of your other riders and it starts running around killing people. wooooo! lots of fun.
Sorry to be joining the crowd, but that was mince.
Although its nice to see Im not the only one that finds tards un-nerving.
Although its nice to see Im not the only one that finds tards un-nerving.
Goatboy wrote:
> by this time the room has been completely evacuated minus paul and the
> two overpowered escorts. picture the scene from alien where the alien
> head inches closer and closer, drool and slime just dripping
> away..thats pretty much how this encounter went with paul just sitting
> there terrified to move. i honestly think if he had blinked his life
> would have been over in that instant. for whatever reason, alan broke
> off his assault and let his captors regain control of him.
===
This is descriptive genius. I just got this mental image of Sigourney Weaver being menaced by a hulking monger.
And "captors" just conjured a Jurassic Tard kind of thing.
I dont know, it just struck me as some of the best writing I've seen anywhere.
> by this time the room has been completely evacuated minus paul and the
> two overpowered escorts. picture the scene from alien where the alien
> head inches closer and closer, drool and slime just dripping
> away..thats pretty much how this encounter went with paul just sitting
> there terrified to move. i honestly think if he had blinked his life
> would have been over in that instant. for whatever reason, alan broke
> off his assault and let his captors regain control of him.
===
This is descriptive genius. I just got this mental image of Sigourney Weaver being menaced by a hulking monger.
And "captors" just conjured a Jurassic Tard kind of thing.
I dont know, it just struck me as some of the best writing I've seen anywhere.
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