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My auntie (of about 60-odd years old), has not been well for the past couple of days; and it wasn't just a cold or anything, she genuinely felt weak, and wouldn't go about places, etc.
Anyway, a specialist came out to see her today (she is deaf, so the Doctors messages were relaed through me), and she said that my Auntie has darkness around the ribs.
Sadly, my Dad says it looks like the start of Cancer or something.
I really didn't know what else to do, or who to talk to; so I posted it here, just to try and get some perspective on it.
By the way, she's lived with us since I was born, so this news is really hard for me to take. She is a very kind person, and I will desperatly miss her with all my heart.
Anyway, a specialist came out to see her today (she is deaf, so the Doctors messages were relaed through me), and she said that my Auntie has darkness around the ribs.
Sadly, my Dad says it looks like the start of Cancer or something.
I really didn't know what else to do, or who to talk to; so I posted it here, just to try and get some perspective on it.
By the way, she's lived with us since I was born, so this news is really hard for me to take. She is a very kind person, and I will desperatly miss her with all my heart.
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Thank you for posting guys.
Seeing what you've wrote, it's helped me to think about things more clearer. Granted, it's certainly not going to help things emotionally for me, but it helps to think that I'm not the only one to have gone through something like this.
Again, thanks.
Seeing what you've wrote, it's helped me to think about things more clearer. Granted, it's certainly not going to help things emotionally for me, but it helps to think that I'm not the only one to have gone through something like this.
Again, thanks.
My Grandad died probably just a year ago today, and his last couple of years were horrible for him, and for the rest of us too. He was in and out of hospital countless times, with various different diseases - diabetes, jondus (spelling), and all sorts, and eventually he passed away. I still miss him, although not as much as before.
As a young kid (before I started school), he always used to look after me with my Gran, as my Mum and Dad both worked full-time, and he always used to take me down to the park nearby to play in the playpark or throw bread for the swans, or something like that. For my first two years of Primary school he took me and picked me up every day, and on birthdays and Christmas's he always gave me the stuff I wanted, and made me happy. When he kept making regular trips to hospital, I always hoped that when he came out, he'd come out for good, but he was always going back, sometimes at night he was too sick for my Gran to cope with, so he had to go back in - it was a continuous cycle, and it caused my family a lot of distress and pain.
Eventually, he died, but after a while, I didn't feel sad - I felt happy - happy that he had finally ended what must've been a traumatic and horrible experience for him - and it had also given my Gran a lot of free time - she was able to do the shopping again her way, able to have a lie in in the morning, and not having to get up late at nights to deal with a sick old man. I'm hoping that my Gran won't pass away too soon - she'll be 80 in Febuary, but thankfully, she's still walking everywhere, getting her own shopping on a regular basis and looking after my younger brothers when my Mum and Dad are out. She's been a large feature in my life, and I'm hoping she won't go through as much pain as my Grandad did.
Well, anyway, I'm sort of droning on a bit too much about nothing here, but my main point is, I know how you feel having a very close relative in a bad state, and you don't know what to do - it's happened to me and it's not pleasent, but that's just the way things are.
As a young kid (before I started school), he always used to look after me with my Gran, as my Mum and Dad both worked full-time, and he always used to take me down to the park nearby to play in the playpark or throw bread for the swans, or something like that. For my first two years of Primary school he took me and picked me up every day, and on birthdays and Christmas's he always gave me the stuff I wanted, and made me happy. When he kept making regular trips to hospital, I always hoped that when he came out, he'd come out for good, but he was always going back, sometimes at night he was too sick for my Gran to cope with, so he had to go back in - it was a continuous cycle, and it caused my family a lot of distress and pain.
Eventually, he died, but after a while, I didn't feel sad - I felt happy - happy that he had finally ended what must've been a traumatic and horrible experience for him - and it had also given my Gran a lot of free time - she was able to do the shopping again her way, able to have a lie in in the morning, and not having to get up late at nights to deal with a sick old man. I'm hoping that my Gran won't pass away too soon - she'll be 80 in Febuary, but thankfully, she's still walking everywhere, getting her own shopping on a regular basis and looking after my younger brothers when my Mum and Dad are out. She's been a large feature in my life, and I'm hoping she won't go through as much pain as my Grandad did.
Well, anyway, I'm sort of droning on a bit too much about nothing here, but my main point is, I know how you feel having a very close relative in a bad state, and you don't know what to do - it's happened to me and it's not pleasent, but that's just the way things are.
My gran was very ill towards the end. She was in and out of hospital, and when she died, they discovered she had cancer as well. She lived in Teesdale (where my dad was born) so I rarely saw her. I didn't feel much emotion. Obviously, I was upset, but I didn't cry or anything. When my friend's grandad died, he went into a trance like thing for a few hours while we were out for my 17th birthday. It was weird, he just zoned out, and looked like he was about to cry for at least an hour or two.
I didn't get anything like that, but then I didn't see my gran as often as he saw his grandad (at least once a week)
I've lost my grandad, my gran, my mum's parents, my uncle and countless other relations, most of whom I've never met, but my dad has told me about (he goes to at least one funeral a year for people I've never even heard of, but they're relatives of mine) My gran had like six brothers, so it's no surprise I have a lot of distant family
I didn't get anything like that, but then I didn't see my gran as often as he saw his grandad (at least once a week)
I've lost my grandad, my gran, my mum's parents, my uncle and countless other relations, most of whom I've never met, but my dad has told me about (he goes to at least one funeral a year for people I've never even heard of, but they're relatives of mine) My gran had like six brothers, so it's no surprise I have a lot of distant family
I know how it feels. My Grandad recently passed away at the age of 91, and whilst he didn't live with us I did see him at least once every week, and helped with shopping e.t.c.
He'd been relatively well until about 4 months ago when he had to go in for an operation on a mild form of cancer, which was successfully treated, but about a month ago he became quite ill, was admitted to hospital where an Xray found a shadow on his lungs - cancer. He was too old for any procedure, and those that were possible he didn't want doing. He didn't give up, but he just wanted the rest of his life to be as normal as possible. When he got worse he siad he didn't want anyone except for his son (my dad) seeing him, which I thought was a bit harsh. But in a way he was right because I do remember him when he was well now, not as he must have been.
Whilst his death was not a massive shock - doctors had told us already it was possible any time - it was a bit of a blow, but I found it good to focus on what he did during his long life, and the lives he must have saved and protected during his 40 years in the RAF, and so on. He always said he didn't want people to be sad and mopse around when he died, because he had had a good life and done everything he wanted to, and outlived nearly all his friends. We've also found out since he died that he singled out part of his estate for me to completely clear all my university fees and student loans, and pay for my final year, which is something that I will always be grateful for. He was proud I went to university because no one else in the recent family had done, with the exception of my dad they'd served in the various forces. Guess this was a way of him saying that.
Don't know if this helps you or not, but at least you can see that at least one of use here has experience similar. The best I can say is to not give up hope she'll be okay - after all my grandad was 91 after all - and to always respect what she wants even if you disagree, and if the worst happens then remember peoples lives, and not their death. Hope that doesnt sound too morbid, just can't think of any way else to say it.
~~Belldandy~~
He'd been relatively well until about 4 months ago when he had to go in for an operation on a mild form of cancer, which was successfully treated, but about a month ago he became quite ill, was admitted to hospital where an Xray found a shadow on his lungs - cancer. He was too old for any procedure, and those that were possible he didn't want doing. He didn't give up, but he just wanted the rest of his life to be as normal as possible. When he got worse he siad he didn't want anyone except for his son (my dad) seeing him, which I thought was a bit harsh. But in a way he was right because I do remember him when he was well now, not as he must have been.
Whilst his death was not a massive shock - doctors had told us already it was possible any time - it was a bit of a blow, but I found it good to focus on what he did during his long life, and the lives he must have saved and protected during his 40 years in the RAF, and so on. He always said he didn't want people to be sad and mopse around when he died, because he had had a good life and done everything he wanted to, and outlived nearly all his friends. We've also found out since he died that he singled out part of his estate for me to completely clear all my university fees and student loans, and pay for my final year, which is something that I will always be grateful for. He was proud I went to university because no one else in the recent family had done, with the exception of my dad they'd served in the various forces. Guess this was a way of him saying that.
Don't know if this helps you or not, but at least you can see that at least one of use here has experience similar. The best I can say is to not give up hope she'll be okay - after all my grandad was 91 after all - and to always respect what she wants even if you disagree, and if the worst happens then remember peoples lives, and not their death. Hope that doesnt sound too morbid, just can't think of any way else to say it.
~~Belldandy~~
My auntie (of about 60-odd years old), has not been well for the past couple of days; and it wasn't just a cold or anything, she genuinely felt weak, and wouldn't go about places, etc.
Anyway, a specialist came out to see her today (she is deaf, so the Doctors messages were relaed through me), and she said that my Auntie has darkness around the ribs.
Sadly, my Dad says it looks like the start of Cancer or something.
I really didn't know what else to do, or who to talk to; so I posted it here, just to try and get some perspective on it.
By the way, she's lived with us since I was born, so this news is really hard for me to take. She is a very kind person, and I will desperatly miss her with all my heart.
Anyway, a specialist came out to see her today (she is deaf, so the Doctors messages were relaed through me), and she said that my Auntie has darkness around the ribs.
Sadly, my Dad says it looks like the start of Cancer or something.
I really didn't know what else to do, or who to talk to; so I posted it here, just to try and get some perspective on it.
By the way, she's lived with us since I was born, so this news is really hard for me to take. She is a very kind person, and I will desperatly miss her with all my heart.
Page: