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"Expecteria Trouserius" (Trouser Snake)
LOCATION:
Throughout the world
DESCRIPTION:
One-eyed, with mushroom-shaped head (other types come with
extra layers of skin). Color varies from pink to black. Fang-less with a highly venomous spit. Spit can reach distances up to 2-3 feet. Size varies from 3 to 12 inches, depending on its mood & sub-species.
SYMPTOMS:
This snake attacks mainly women in the lower front abdomen, resulting in an inconspicuous bump. Then a severe swelling followed by excruciating pain after nine months. The attack is not usually fatal.
BEWARE:
It has been known to attack men in the rear lower abdomen!
HABITAT:
Usually found in bedrooms, but has been known to appear in the most unusual places.
ANTIDOTE:
Various types of vaccine available for women. However, once the venom is injected into the body only drastic measures will ensure complete recovery. There is no known antidote for men.
WHAT TO DO WHEN ATTACKED
TOURNIQUET:
Do not apply a tourniquet as the venom is too deep in the body to be affected.
CUTTING THE WOUND:
This would be completely unnecessary and ineffective as the bleeding will stop after a few weeks anyhow.
SUCKING THE WOUND:
This method is the most popular with the victim, but so far has not been reported to have led to any success.
SEARCHING FOR ANTI-VENOM:
1. Place four fingers of the right hand around the neck of the
reptile, with the thumb in the front.
2. Grip firmly and move the hand in an upwards and downwards motion.
3. This will result in the snake becoming highly aggressive, very
rigid and start spitting.
The time taken for this milking process depends entirely on the
milker and the last time the snake attacked. Once milked, the snake should be harmless for about 20 minutes.
CONCLUSION:
This snake, although it is very aggressive and active, is not
necessarily a vermin, and treated with the right respect, makes a wonderful pet.
HHHHMMMMMMMMMMmmmmmm*cough*...
> She's both
******
Don't confuse me with your mum.
> Semajal wrote:
>
> thankyou for sharing that with us myst :)
>
> "Myst put that thing away"
>
> Hur hur, I thought she was Female.
*******
She is.
> Mystique wrote:
> Oh you loved it!
>
> no, you love it.
*****
Oh I know I love it
Rrrrrrrrr
> Mystique wrote:
> Oh you loved it!
>
> no, you love it.
hey check the time hope you aint at work LOL