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Another day another games related story
In short:
Mother buys her 4 children a DS between them. She complains they fight over it (no? Really?) and spend too long on it, then don't do any music practice or housework.
What should really happen:
Mother is sent to jail for imposed music lessons and child labour (as well as being too thick to bring up kids).
In short:
Mother buys her 4 children a DS between them. She complains they fight over it (no? Really?) and spend too long on it, then don't do any music practice or housework.
What should really happen:
Mother is sent to jail for imposed music lessons and child labour (as well as being too thick to bring up kids).
Page:
Another day another games related story
In short:
Mother buys her 4 children a DS between them. She complains they fight over it (no? Really?) and spend too long on it, then don't do any music practice or housework.
What should really happen:
Mother is sent to jail for imposed music lessons and child labour (as well as being too thick to bring up kids).
In short:
Mother buys her 4 children a DS between them. She complains they fight over it (no? Really?) and spend too long on it, then don't do any music practice or housework.
What should really happen:
Mother is sent to jail for imposed music lessons and child labour (as well as being too thick to bring up kids).
They really need to start reporting REAL news and not their stupid opinions on what they think news is.
One of the comments "I bought my kids two packs of razor blades and left them for a few hours. I came back from the shops to find they had cut themselves. Must blame Gillette!"
One of the comments "I bought my kids two packs of razor blades and left them for a few hours. I came back from the shops to find they had cut themselves. Must blame Gillette!"
Odd, really, that in the many years between my brother being also old enough to be gaming and my parents getting a second PC, I can't remember anything like this about who got to play something. Might be because this is from when I was very young, or maybe that -shock horror- my family isn't actually that messed up...
Says something about Daily Mail readers I think. Time to check telegraph.co.uk...
Says something about Daily Mail readers I think. Time to check telegraph.co.uk...
bad parents i guess. Daily heil doing its bit to spread the idea that parents can avoid responsibilies of parenting and blame games for their troubles.
right, it`s been a while since i brewed up a rant, but this catalogue of stupidity leaves me no alternative, so lets have at this sap shall we kids?:
"What finally did it was a suggestion from my oldest child that without a Nintendo in her school bag, she would be unable to fit in at school. (Yes, I know - oldest trick in the book. And I fell for it.)"
so!
it`s nintendos fault that you as a parent have such little spine that you curtail to the demands of your children, no matter how spoilt they may be. Although, when faced with the dilemma that your kid "wouldn`t fit in at school" without a DS, 2 things should`ve ocurred to you:
1) you`re able to afford to send your FOUR children to a school where the must-have accessory for an 8 year old is £100 game system (i`m assuming she already has her own mobile as well)
2) the inbuilt response that ALL parents are given at the first hint of conception: "if they jumped off a cliff, would you do it?"
"It was that, plus reading a piece in one newspaper [snip - i heart brain trainer]... And another piece from child expert Dr Tanya Byron"
yes yes, it`s their fault too then.
"It was that, plus reading a piece in one newspaper which suggested that if you regularly played Brain Trainer on your Nintendo, you'd bump up your mental acuity."
that`s no more than the contemporary version of "please can i have a commodore 46 or a spectrum.. it`ll..er.. help with homework!!! yes.. yes that`s it"
again, i thought parent could smell this line a mile off.
"When the pale blue, £150 Nintendo finally arrived last November, fresh from Hong Kong (I had bought it on the net), crammed with a 'bundle' of 20 games including Brain Trainer, Fifa 08, and Nintendogs, my children hugged me tightly."
right, DS lite + 3 games is about £160 generally, so how much for a DS and 20 games (imported or not)?
are we starting to get the impression that these people aren`t short of a quid or 2? (are the poor allowed to read the daily mail?)
"I found Brain Trainer utterly predictable"
only because it had made you THAT sharp. obviously.
"I'll admit, the Nintendo had its uses. I managed to achieve a longheld aim of getting a short haircut for Phoebe via the simple tactic of allowing her to take the Nintendo to the hairdresser's."
(check the picture, DS or not, that kid is going to get bullied anyway now)
so, you used it to distract your child long enough to placate her while you paid another person to inflict a physical injustice upon her. that`s how date rape starts you sicko.
"Having a Nintendo to hand is also jolly useful when you are on a train with a child and want to read a book, write a letter or call the office."
edit: "it`s great for watching my kids when i can`t be bothered."
"I spotted Phoebe's cello...."
"...old habits of reading, playing the violin"
who else knew ONE of them was going to be playing a cello? they just look like a cello family, and now another one plays the violin.
again, for a quick recap: so far they can afford 4 children, a DS with 20 games, a violin and a cello.
to be able to drum up the capital to obtain and maintain that little lot, it`s reasonable to assume one of the following:
A - you`re educated to a high standard, so the flash of genius that is "1 into 4 won`t go" must have flagged this up as a bad idea at some point
or
B - you`re a moron who is kept by your husbands money, safe in the knowledge that 4 kids has pretty much secured you for income when he runs off with his secretary, and he will. partly because you were too busy complaining to your kneejerk pseudo-intellectual breakfast rag, trying to shift the blame for your failings as a parent and partly because inbetween giving your children lesbian haircuts, you`ve demonstrated that you`re clearly devoid of any common sense and he`s just plain sick of dealing with your stupidity.
4 is enough, stop breeding and take up running.
with scissors.
"What finally did it was a suggestion from my oldest child that without a Nintendo in her school bag, she would be unable to fit in at school. (Yes, I know - oldest trick in the book. And I fell for it.)"
so!
it`s nintendos fault that you as a parent have such little spine that you curtail to the demands of your children, no matter how spoilt they may be. Although, when faced with the dilemma that your kid "wouldn`t fit in at school" without a DS, 2 things should`ve ocurred to you:
1) you`re able to afford to send your FOUR children to a school where the must-have accessory for an 8 year old is £100 game system (i`m assuming she already has her own mobile as well)
2) the inbuilt response that ALL parents are given at the first hint of conception: "if they jumped off a cliff, would you do it?"
"It was that, plus reading a piece in one newspaper [snip - i heart brain trainer]... And another piece from child expert Dr Tanya Byron"
yes yes, it`s their fault too then.
"It was that, plus reading a piece in one newspaper which suggested that if you regularly played Brain Trainer on your Nintendo, you'd bump up your mental acuity."
that`s no more than the contemporary version of "please can i have a commodore 46 or a spectrum.. it`ll..er.. help with homework!!! yes.. yes that`s it"
again, i thought parent could smell this line a mile off.
"When the pale blue, £150 Nintendo finally arrived last November, fresh from Hong Kong (I had bought it on the net), crammed with a 'bundle' of 20 games including Brain Trainer, Fifa 08, and Nintendogs, my children hugged me tightly."
right, DS lite + 3 games is about £160 generally, so how much for a DS and 20 games (imported or not)?
are we starting to get the impression that these people aren`t short of a quid or 2? (are the poor allowed to read the daily mail?)
"I found Brain Trainer utterly predictable"
only because it had made you THAT sharp. obviously.
"I'll admit, the Nintendo had its uses. I managed to achieve a longheld aim of getting a short haircut for Phoebe via the simple tactic of allowing her to take the Nintendo to the hairdresser's."
(check the picture, DS or not, that kid is going to get bullied anyway now)
so, you used it to distract your child long enough to placate her while you paid another person to inflict a physical injustice upon her. that`s how date rape starts you sicko.
"Having a Nintendo to hand is also jolly useful when you are on a train with a child and want to read a book, write a letter or call the office."
edit: "it`s great for watching my kids when i can`t be bothered."
"I spotted Phoebe's cello...."
"...old habits of reading, playing the violin"
who else knew ONE of them was going to be playing a cello? they just look like a cello family, and now another one plays the violin.
again, for a quick recap: so far they can afford 4 children, a DS with 20 games, a violin and a cello.
to be able to drum up the capital to obtain and maintain that little lot, it`s reasonable to assume one of the following:
A - you`re educated to a high standard, so the flash of genius that is "1 into 4 won`t go" must have flagged this up as a bad idea at some point
or
B - you`re a moron who is kept by your husbands money, safe in the knowledge that 4 kids has pretty much secured you for income when he runs off with his secretary, and he will. partly because you were too busy complaining to your kneejerk pseudo-intellectual breakfast rag, trying to shift the blame for your failings as a parent and partly because inbetween giving your children lesbian haircuts, you`ve demonstrated that you`re clearly devoid of any common sense and he`s just plain sick of dealing with your stupidity.
4 is enough, stop breeding and take up running.
with scissors.
mercyless. But oh so true. Screw the daily heil and their stories. They miss the point of an important news story and opt for sensationlist stuff. They won't listen if we provide a valid arguement. They'll simply attempt to win by scare mongering.
Very_Metal - that last part made me laugh out loud in the office. Thank you!
Good post VM, hope that wins
Very_Metal wrote:
> 4 is enough, stop breeding and take up running.
> with scissors.
I may have to use that quote sometime soon!
Brilliant rant! Well done :)
> 4 is enough, stop breeding and take up running.
> with scissors.
I may have to use that quote sometime soon!
Brilliant rant! Well done :)
Pretty sad that anybody can think that what V_M has posted is valid or deserved.
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