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"Let me write you a film"

Hi, I'm Alistair Gray. You may remember from such staff topics as 'Stop bugging me,' and 'I'll look into it.' This is a serious topic, not really work related, this is me writing from home - hey, it doesn't happen very often, so savour every moment. You may or may not know, but my capacity here at Special Reserve is writer, I do the news, the e-mails and some of the reviews. But what I really want, is to write a film/book. And this is where you help me.

I need an idea. I'm a perfectly competent writer, I know all about structure, balancing, character development and all that jazz, but I just need a spark, something to set me writing. I need an idea, a good idea that I can base a film around. God knows I have enough spare time (I'm here aren't I?) and I'm really into the idea of writing some serious stuff, rather than news about a game with monkeys in it. Seeing as the standard of writing in these forums is through the roof, I was wondering if any of you fine people have some ideas you'd like to share for such a project - just ideas, premises, floaty notions - anything at all to get me started, because once I'm off, it'll be done within a week. I'm looking at people like Grix, Meka, Mr. Happy and Goaty, and the others who write such fine stories day in, day out right here on these very forums. You can help me fulfill my potential.

If you have any ideas you'd like to share, or just anything you feel could help me, please e-mail me at [email protected] and let me know, because I'm eager to get started quickly. I'm not looking for anything too heavy, but I don't want to write a comedy either, because... well, basically I don't think I'm funny.

Please, with your help, you can put a smile on the News Monkey's face and fill his spare time with things other than eating. Any thoughts at all, let them flow and I'll thank you profusely in the credits when I'm rich and famous. Cheers.

Ali

Do my alternate couple idea, but don't tell anyone.

Mr.Snuggly wrote:
I want a Fincher-like twist, but I'm crap at thinking up anything that doesn't involve monkeys, or super-monkeys.

See?!

Make it so that monkeys moved to another planet, but then started bombarding Earth with radioactive somethings to kill the doo-dahs.

"Whaddya say Jo-Jo, we gonna whack 'dos Bonobos? Dey f####g wid ya boss!"

"Easy Knuckles, ring da Silverback boys, we'll have them swinging from a different tyre within the week."

Do a story about a planet with apes on, maybe called 'planet run by apes'. And they could send a man to the moon. twood be so ironic. Imagine it, a film about monkey ruling a planet....

It's going to co-star Matthew Broderick as an astronaut, who smuggles them back from the Moon after he finds them in a crater. They were clever enough to build a craft to get there, but didn't have the astronomical skills to fix a problem and get back. William Shatner stars as the gritty commander back in Houston, and Jennifer Aniston falls for Clint Monkey. Wings Hauser is also attached to the project.

Man, I'm tired.

I can see it now:

"Don't fret Jo-Jo. We'll get the b******s' that got you throat."

A weekly serial about crime-lord Apes.
Dressed like 40s gangsters with natty suits and fedoras.

"Miller's Crossing in The Mist"

I can see it now:

SUPER-INTELLIGENT APES
They'll make a monkey out of you

One has a Groucho Mark accent, one speaks like Clint Eastwood and the other has a Stephen Hawking voicebox because he was made to smoke in a lab. I'm a goddamn genius.

You did art. Make comics and put them on the 'net. You've got the writing skill, (most) of the art skillz and the mashed-up imagination that I'm sure Stan Lee has. Do it Doug!!!!!!