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really, they are.
I was wandering through Blockbuster action section tonight (what is it with Blockbuster, you go in full of life in brain, yet end up meandering around all the aisles looking at shabby 80s action movies with Lewis Collins?), and I came across the "hardman" section.
Jean-Claude Van Damme.
He's a midget and got his start in gay porno movies in Belgium. He always does the splits and avenges some spakker brother who ends up in a wheelchair. I reckon I could kick his face off.
Steven Seagal.
The portly kung-fu grand-dad.
His moves consist of murky hand movements and a face like he needs to take a dump.
Either shoot him in his pudgy head or chuck pies at him to distract him and allow yourself escape time whilst he crammed them into his squinty fat face.
Oliver Gruner.
He's called Oliver.
I could drive my car up him in no time at all.
Vinnie Jones.
Chuck a wordpuzzle at him and hide in a library, he's too thick to open the door, let alone search through the books for you.
Chuck Norris.
He used to be good, but now he just smiles and lifts his aging legs for the villains to run into and then hurl themselves backwards through windows.
Poof.
I'm bored.
I was wandering through Blockbuster action section tonight (what is it with Blockbuster, you go in full of life in brain, yet end up meandering around all the aisles looking at shabby 80s action movies with Lewis Collins?), and I came across the "hardman" section.
Jean-Claude Van Damme.
He's a midget and got his start in gay porno movies in Belgium. He always does the splits and avenges some spakker brother who ends up in a wheelchair. I reckon I could kick his face off.
Steven Seagal.
The portly kung-fu grand-dad.
His moves consist of murky hand movements and a face like he needs to take a dump.
Either shoot him in his pudgy head or chuck pies at him to distract him and allow yourself escape time whilst he crammed them into his squinty fat face.
Oliver Gruner.
He's called Oliver.
I could drive my car up him in no time at all.
Vinnie Jones.
Chuck a wordpuzzle at him and hide in a library, he's too thick to open the door, let alone search through the books for you.
Chuck Norris.
He used to be good, but now he just smiles and lifts his aging legs for the villains to run into and then hurl themselves backwards through windows.
Poof.
I'm bored.
Page:
Universal Soldier has Dulph Lundgren AND Jean Claude Van Damme! Amazing!
How come you didn't mention Arnie, or Stallone, or Willis? Eh?
How come you didn't mention Arnie, or Stallone, or Willis? Eh?
You forgot Dolph! That is unforgiveable. I am truly sickened!
He is an army of one! Nobody can stop him.
And he is also the master of the universe!
He is an army of one! Nobody can stop him.
And he is also the master of the universe!
really, they are.
I was wandering through Blockbuster action section tonight (what is it with Blockbuster, you go in full of life in brain, yet end up meandering around all the aisles looking at shabby 80s action movies with Lewis Collins?), and I came across the "hardman" section.
Jean-Claude Van Damme.
He's a midget and got his start in gay porno movies in Belgium. He always does the splits and avenges some spakker brother who ends up in a wheelchair. I reckon I could kick his face off.
Steven Seagal.
The portly kung-fu grand-dad.
His moves consist of murky hand movements and a face like he needs to take a dump.
Either shoot him in his pudgy head or chuck pies at him to distract him and allow yourself escape time whilst he crammed them into his squinty fat face.
Oliver Gruner.
He's called Oliver.
I could drive my car up him in no time at all.
Vinnie Jones.
Chuck a wordpuzzle at him and hide in a library, he's too thick to open the door, let alone search through the books for you.
Chuck Norris.
He used to be good, but now he just smiles and lifts his aging legs for the villains to run into and then hurl themselves backwards through windows.
Poof.
I'm bored.
I was wandering through Blockbuster action section tonight (what is it with Blockbuster, you go in full of life in brain, yet end up meandering around all the aisles looking at shabby 80s action movies with Lewis Collins?), and I came across the "hardman" section.
Jean-Claude Van Damme.
He's a midget and got his start in gay porno movies in Belgium. He always does the splits and avenges some spakker brother who ends up in a wheelchair. I reckon I could kick his face off.
Steven Seagal.
The portly kung-fu grand-dad.
His moves consist of murky hand movements and a face like he needs to take a dump.
Either shoot him in his pudgy head or chuck pies at him to distract him and allow yourself escape time whilst he crammed them into his squinty fat face.
Oliver Gruner.
He's called Oliver.
I could drive my car up him in no time at all.
Vinnie Jones.
Chuck a wordpuzzle at him and hide in a library, he's too thick to open the door, let alone search through the books for you.
Chuck Norris.
He used to be good, but now he just smiles and lifts his aging legs for the villains to run into and then hurl themselves backwards through windows.
Poof.
I'm bored.
Page: