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During a SAGA holiday to Sellafield, widow Mavis Smallbridge's life was changed forever. During a routine demonstration at the Nuclear Power station of the safety of Nuclear energy a spider that had been contaminated dropped onto Mavis, biting her, and turning her into Spidernan, crime fighting OAP hero.
It was a normal Monday afternoon, Mavis sat watching Countdown, knitting away. Only it wasn't wool she was kniting with, oh no. from her wrists came a slightly sticky solution, pure white, and perfect for a new scarf. Spidernan's ability to produce this 'web-string' had saved her a small fortune in wool, and her grandchildren had been givensome lovely knitted garments thanks to it. Mavis thought of her grandchildren as she knitted awy. Little Bobby was nearly three, and was ever so cheeky, and Louise had just turned 1, and was beginning to take her first steps. It was a shame she didn't see more of them, she thought, but they were always ever so busy.
As Richard Whitley said his pre-interval funnies Mavis felt her spider-sense start to tingle....
Half an hour later Mavis had put her clothes in the wash, and mopped up most of the pee from the couch. It was gettign awfully difficult for her to distinguish between her spider-sense, and the need to pee these days, and this hadn't been the first accident she'd had.
Moments later she felt her spider sense tingle for real. After sitting on the loo for a few minutes to make sure Mavis dressed into her special suit, making sure to slip a Tenalady pad into her knickers just in case, and headed out onto the streets.
Word on the streets was that the Grey Goblin was planning an escape from the old folks home, and go back to his evil ways. Not if Spidernan could stop him though, just like she did before.
Spidernan headed to see her informant, Doris Worburton, she always had an ear to the ground.
"Oh, Spidernan, come on in, I've just got a pot of tea on the brew. Would you like to stay for dinner, I got myself a nice bit of fish." said Doris as she answered the door.
"No time for that Doris, I need to know if you've heard anything about the Grey Goblin." replied Spidernan.
"You sit down, and I'll get the biscuits, and tell you all about it..." said Doris.
"Ooh I do like that plate" said Spidernan, picking up a biscuit to reveal another scene from the life of Jesus, with cats of represent Jesus.
"Oh yes, I got it mail order, just 12 easy payments of £18" replied Doris, flicking through a Sunday magazine looking for the offer.
"Doris, the Grey Goblin?" asked Spidernan.
"Oh, you won't believe what I heard. The Grey Goblin has checked out of the old folks home"
"I know that, what else"
"Well, Maureen thinks that he'll probably go sit by the pond for s bit, watch the ducks."
"The ducks? but of course! Thanks for the tea Doris!" Spidernan got up, but maybe a little too quickly, so she had to sit down for a bit, and have another biscuit. Rich Tea they were, very nice, yes.
Later, at the pond...
"Hmmm, my spider-sense is going crazy, he must be close." Thoug spidernan, peeping from behind a tree.
Eventually he arrived, and took a seat at the bench. In his hand was a brown paper bag.
"It's a bomb!" thought Spidernan, and ran out of her hiding place to confront the former super-villian.
As she approached, he put his hand into the bag, and removed some bread, and threw it to the ducks. In dismay Spidernan tried to stop running, but slipped over, passing out when she hit the ground.
"Well it looks like she's done her hip in, not only that, she appears to have pee'd herself too." said the ambulance man, as he tried to assess the situation. "Who called us by the way?"
"Oh, it was someone claiming to be the Grey Goblin" replied the other paramedic.
"Oh, that'll be him asleep there on the bench, should we wake him, it's getting cold."
So once Spidernan had been loaded onto the ambulance the paramedics approached the bench.
The closer they got the stranger the man sat asleep on the bench appeared to be.
When they got close enough, they realised he wasn't real at all, just a dummy, only in the dummy's hand was a note, it read:
"The Grey Goblin is back, prepare for terror!"
----------
Would Spidernan recover in time to take on the Grey Goblin? Would he forget who he was, and settle for putting his be-slippered feet up by a cosy fire, or will he terrorise the youth by tutting loudly and othe such acts of condemnation?
Join us next time to find out!
It was a normal Monday afternoon, Mavis sat watching Countdown, knitting away. Only it wasn't wool she was kniting with, oh no. from her wrists came a slightly sticky solution, pure white, and perfect for a new scarf. Spidernan's ability to produce this 'web-string' had saved her a small fortune in wool, and her grandchildren had been givensome lovely knitted garments thanks to it. Mavis thought of her grandchildren as she knitted awy. Little Bobby was nearly three, and was ever so cheeky, and Louise had just turned 1, and was beginning to take her first steps. It was a shame she didn't see more of them, she thought, but they were always ever so busy.
As Richard Whitley said his pre-interval funnies Mavis felt her spider-sense start to tingle....
Half an hour later Mavis had put her clothes in the wash, and mopped up most of the pee from the couch. It was gettign awfully difficult for her to distinguish between her spider-sense, and the need to pee these days, and this hadn't been the first accident she'd had.
Moments later she felt her spider sense tingle for real. After sitting on the loo for a few minutes to make sure Mavis dressed into her special suit, making sure to slip a Tenalady pad into her knickers just in case, and headed out onto the streets.
Word on the streets was that the Grey Goblin was planning an escape from the old folks home, and go back to his evil ways. Not if Spidernan could stop him though, just like she did before.
Spidernan headed to see her informant, Doris Worburton, she always had an ear to the ground.
"Oh, Spidernan, come on in, I've just got a pot of tea on the brew. Would you like to stay for dinner, I got myself a nice bit of fish." said Doris as she answered the door.
"No time for that Doris, I need to know if you've heard anything about the Grey Goblin." replied Spidernan.
"You sit down, and I'll get the biscuits, and tell you all about it..." said Doris.
"Ooh I do like that plate" said Spidernan, picking up a biscuit to reveal another scene from the life of Jesus, with cats of represent Jesus.
"Oh yes, I got it mail order, just 12 easy payments of £18" replied Doris, flicking through a Sunday magazine looking for the offer.
"Doris, the Grey Goblin?" asked Spidernan.
"Oh, you won't believe what I heard. The Grey Goblin has checked out of the old folks home"
"I know that, what else"
"Well, Maureen thinks that he'll probably go sit by the pond for s bit, watch the ducks."
"The ducks? but of course! Thanks for the tea Doris!" Spidernan got up, but maybe a little too quickly, so she had to sit down for a bit, and have another biscuit. Rich Tea they were, very nice, yes.
Later, at the pond...
"Hmmm, my spider-sense is going crazy, he must be close." Thoug spidernan, peeping from behind a tree.
Eventually he arrived, and took a seat at the bench. In his hand was a brown paper bag.
"It's a bomb!" thought Spidernan, and ran out of her hiding place to confront the former super-villian.
As she approached, he put his hand into the bag, and removed some bread, and threw it to the ducks. In dismay Spidernan tried to stop running, but slipped over, passing out when she hit the ground.
"Well it looks like she's done her hip in, not only that, she appears to have pee'd herself too." said the ambulance man, as he tried to assess the situation. "Who called us by the way?"
"Oh, it was someone claiming to be the Grey Goblin" replied the other paramedic.
"Oh, that'll be him asleep there on the bench, should we wake him, it's getting cold."
So once Spidernan had been loaded onto the ambulance the paramedics approached the bench.
The closer they got the stranger the man sat asleep on the bench appeared to be.
When they got close enough, they realised he wasn't real at all, just a dummy, only in the dummy's hand was a note, it read:
"The Grey Goblin is back, prepare for terror!"
----------
Would Spidernan recover in time to take on the Grey Goblin? Would he forget who he was, and settle for putting his be-slippered feet up by a cosy fire, or will he terrorise the youth by tutting loudly and othe such acts of condemnation?
Join us next time to find out!
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My spoofs are funnier ;)
That was brilliant!
I just read it, and I couldn't help laughing aloud. I also did that at some of the replies, especially Goatboy's one of laughing at your own.. well, you know.
:-)
Good one!
I just read it, and I couldn't help laughing aloud. I also did that at some of the replies, especially Goatboy's one of laughing at your own.. well, you know.
:-)
Good one!
What a well deserved GAD,
Congrats Meks :)
Congrats Meks :)
Meka Dragon wrote:
> I was in the toilets when I came up with this
> idea.
Honestly.
"Spidernan" just popped into my head, and it
> made me laugh out loud.
Luckily I wasn't standing next to anyone else at the
> time, or they may have thought I was laughing at their c**k.
Ha ha, that would be the funniest thing ever. Well maybe not, but still funny.
> I was in the toilets when I came up with this
> idea.
Honestly.
"Spidernan" just popped into my head, and it
> made me laugh out loud.
Luckily I wasn't standing next to anyone else at the
> time, or they may have thought I was laughing at their c**k.
Ha ha, that would be the funniest thing ever. Well maybe not, but still funny.
Armatige Shanks wrote:
> Meka Dragon wrote:
> During a SAGA holiday to Sellafield, widow Mavis
> Smallbridge's life was changed
> forever. During a routine demonstration at
> the Nuclear Power station of the
> safety of Nuclear energy a spider that
> had been contaminated dropped onto Mavis,
> biting her, and turning her into
> Spidernan, crime fighting OAP hero.
ahh... SpiderNan ... lol! :)
> Meka Dragon wrote:
> During a SAGA holiday to Sellafield, widow Mavis
> Smallbridge's life was changed
> forever. During a routine demonstration at
> the Nuclear Power station of the
> safety of Nuclear energy a spider that
> had been contaminated dropped onto Mavis,
> biting her, and turning her into
> Spidernan, crime fighting OAP hero.
ahh... SpiderNan ... lol! :)
Or your own, which would be worse.
Meka Dragon wrote:
> During a SAGA holiday to Sellafield, widow Mavis Smallbridge's life was changed
> forever. During a routine demonstration at the Nuclear Power station of the
> safety of Nuclear energy a spider that had been contaminated dropped onto Mavis,
> biting her, and turning her into Spidernan, crime fighting OAP hero.
Spiderman or SpiderGran?
> During a SAGA holiday to Sellafield, widow Mavis Smallbridge's life was changed
> forever. During a routine demonstration at the Nuclear Power station of the
> safety of Nuclear energy a spider that had been contaminated dropped onto Mavis,
> biting her, and turning her into Spidernan, crime fighting OAP hero.
Spiderman or SpiderGran?
I was in the toilets when I came up with this idea.
Honestly.
"Spidernan" just popped into my head, and it made me laugh out loud.
Luckily I wasn't standing next to anyone else at the time, or they may have thought I was laughing at their c**k.
Honestly.
"Spidernan" just popped into my head, and it made me laugh out loud.
Luckily I wasn't standing next to anyone else at the time, or they may have thought I was laughing at their c**k.
LOL, expect Warner Bros. offering you a contract fo the rights of 'Spidernan'.
I see an animated series coming soon.
I see an animated series coming soon.
Spidernan.
Excellent.
"Spidernan...Spidernan..does whatever a spider can. But with more stops for tea and urinating on herself. And a nice tea cosy hat. And a Spidey coat whatever the weather"
Excellent.
"Spidernan...Spidernan..does whatever a spider can. But with more stops for tea and urinating on herself. And a nice tea cosy hat. And a Spidey coat whatever the weather"
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