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My school had it's parents evening tonight.
Lucky me. I had the wonderful opportunity of being able to sit staring at teachers.
First appointment, Science. A bloke with a skinhead, who claims to be a teacher. As usual, the school mistimed appointments grossly, meaning I have to stand outside waiting for 15 minutes while the skinhead talks to the parents of a nerd student. I wonder how he managed to spend 15 minutes saying how great the girl was. Surely you can't stretch the words 'She is a good student' for 15 minutes, can you?
Skinhead pops his head out of the door, and tells me we can come in. My heart nearly explodes with jubilation. We walk over to his desk, and sit down.
"So, what do you feel about the situation in Science?" skinhead says to my mum. She isn't even aware that there is much of a situation.
Skinhead then rambles on about just how much I am underachieving. Underachieving? Excuse me, but surely I should be the one decided just how much I want to achieve? It would have been more accurate if he had said ‘You are not achieving as highly as we want you to. We are on performance related pay you know’.
He talks, and I refute everything he says. He says that I’m holding back everyone in the class due to my constant calling out. Fair enough, I guess, when you think about it.
He would actually have earned some respect in my eyes, if he hadn’t then gone and realized that he sounded like he hated me. He does hate me, but that isn’t the kind of impression he wants to give to my mum. And so, he then starts talking about how my constant interruptions are affecting my friendship with other people in the class. I crack up, right there in front of his eyes, and say ‘I don’t really think it’s any of your business how my friendships with others in the class are’.
‘Well yes Ross (Me), it is my business as a teacher to ensure my class is happy. Last time you called out, no one understood your joke’.
‘Sir, you don’t seem to understand that I am perfectly happy. Everyone else in the class is happy, and if they’re not then it isn’t anything to do with me. If they don’t like me, then that’s their problem’.
I would have said more, but I was cut off by another teacher, Mr. Old Dastard who frequently tells our class that he hates kids. I won’t even go into this guys talking at me.
Anyway, all this made me think. What the hell am I doing in these teachers lessons? I don’t want to be there, they don’t want me to be there, and according to them the rest of the class don’t want me there. So why the hell am I in lessons with these guys for 4 or 5 hours a week?
I’d learn more if I sat in a room, on my own, with a book to learn from.
Frikkin education system. Frikkin society. Frikkin life.
Lucky me. I had the wonderful opportunity of being able to sit staring at teachers.
First appointment, Science. A bloke with a skinhead, who claims to be a teacher. As usual, the school mistimed appointments grossly, meaning I have to stand outside waiting for 15 minutes while the skinhead talks to the parents of a nerd student. I wonder how he managed to spend 15 minutes saying how great the girl was. Surely you can't stretch the words 'She is a good student' for 15 minutes, can you?
Skinhead pops his head out of the door, and tells me we can come in. My heart nearly explodes with jubilation. We walk over to his desk, and sit down.
"So, what do you feel about the situation in Science?" skinhead says to my mum. She isn't even aware that there is much of a situation.
Skinhead then rambles on about just how much I am underachieving. Underachieving? Excuse me, but surely I should be the one decided just how much I want to achieve? It would have been more accurate if he had said ‘You are not achieving as highly as we want you to. We are on performance related pay you know’.
He talks, and I refute everything he says. He says that I’m holding back everyone in the class due to my constant calling out. Fair enough, I guess, when you think about it.
He would actually have earned some respect in my eyes, if he hadn’t then gone and realized that he sounded like he hated me. He does hate me, but that isn’t the kind of impression he wants to give to my mum. And so, he then starts talking about how my constant interruptions are affecting my friendship with other people in the class. I crack up, right there in front of his eyes, and say ‘I don’t really think it’s any of your business how my friendships with others in the class are’.
‘Well yes Ross (Me), it is my business as a teacher to ensure my class is happy. Last time you called out, no one understood your joke’.
‘Sir, you don’t seem to understand that I am perfectly happy. Everyone else in the class is happy, and if they’re not then it isn’t anything to do with me. If they don’t like me, then that’s their problem’.
I would have said more, but I was cut off by another teacher, Mr. Old Dastard who frequently tells our class that he hates kids. I won’t even go into this guys talking at me.
Anyway, all this made me think. What the hell am I doing in these teachers lessons? I don’t want to be there, they don’t want me to be there, and according to them the rest of the class don’t want me there. So why the hell am I in lessons with these guys for 4 or 5 hours a week?
I’d learn more if I sat in a room, on my own, with a book to learn from.
Frikkin education system. Frikkin society. Frikkin life.
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Oh yeah
And how could i forget about the worst one of all???
RE!!!!!!!
I hate this subjest the most.
My teachers just love it so much i think they read the bible every night and lots of other weird things.
Well anyway i hate ths subject so much that i try to go to sleep in class and if the teacher sees me then she will make me do lots of religeous related questions and quiz me on the stuff.
theyll say stuff like,
Miss: what did Jesus say in chapter 5 genesis matthew mark luke and john of the global equinox of hell when satan and his naughty followers poked him in the eye with thier sticks that were given to them by moses
( well she doesnt exactly say this sorta stuf but thats what i like to interpretate them as) ( makes it more interesting if you ask me)
Me: erm........ hmmmmmmmm.........i think he said........eeeeerrrrmmmmm.......
( i would do this for about 10 mins )
........he could have said alot of things but nobody really knows apart from Smarties.
Remember miss......... Only Smarties have the answer!
And so she would sent me to detention.
Ah well........ it was worth it............ hahaha.
And how could i forget about the worst one of all???
RE!!!!!!!
I hate this subjest the most.
My teachers just love it so much i think they read the bible every night and lots of other weird things.
Well anyway i hate ths subject so much that i try to go to sleep in class and if the teacher sees me then she will make me do lots of religeous related questions and quiz me on the stuff.
theyll say stuff like,
Miss: what did Jesus say in chapter 5 genesis matthew mark luke and john of the global equinox of hell when satan and his naughty followers poked him in the eye with thier sticks that were given to them by moses
( well she doesnt exactly say this sorta stuf but thats what i like to interpretate them as) ( makes it more interesting if you ask me)
Me: erm........ hmmmmmmmm.........i think he said........eeeeerrrrmmmmm.......
( i would do this for about 10 mins )
........he could have said alot of things but nobody really knows apart from Smarties.
Remember miss......... Only Smarties have the answer!
And so she would sent me to detention.
Ah well........ it was worth it............ hahaha.
pb wrote:
"I just love ignorance. Of course you shouldn't have to learn anything, your learning comes from the streets, doesn't it. You don't need to know about writing style or get joy from a play, you don't need to have an appreciation of other people's religion, do you, of course not."
Ignorance is several miles in the other direction to learning more about life than you do in school... I have learnt everything I'll ever need in school, but I've developed it outside. Now, there's nothing left for me to learn, or do, in school, and it terrifies me.
"I just love ignorance. Of course you shouldn't have to learn anything, your learning comes from the streets, doesn't it. You don't need to know about writing style or get joy from a play, you don't need to have an appreciation of other people's religion, do you, of course not."
Ignorance is several miles in the other direction to learning more about life than you do in school... I have learnt everything I'll ever need in school, but I've developed it outside. Now, there's nothing left for me to learn, or do, in school, and it terrifies me.
Bah, don't get me wrong, Pb, I'm there to learn and that's what I do. I don't want to end up with no future working in McDonalds, I have ambitions and aspirations. I'm going to where I want to (hopefull) but having a laugh on the way, all work and no play makes Rasta do a cold turkey :'( :-D
This is a good read.
i know its long but its good.
I hate some of my teachers.
We'll start with Chemistry:
The teacher is just too boring and not funny even though he thinks he is.
When he's talking and says if you dont understand anything then ask me a question and so he starts talking and i dont understand him and so i ask him a question.He answers me and continues.He makes no sense at al so i start asking him a few more questions like "Why is H20 called H20" and then he'll say something like "because its Hydrogen x2 and Oxgen" and it just starts from there.
He gets really mad because i want to know things.
And so i just keep asking him stuff relating to the thing i just asked.
So it would go like this
Sir:Because its 2x Hydrogen and 1x Oxygen
Me: So why is it called Hydrogen??
Sir: I dont know
Me: So why did you get employed here??
Sir: If you ask one more question like that i'll......
Me: DOUSH........(i hit him and he's pancaked on the floor) hehe
Me: why dont you know what the answer is???
Now we move onto French
My teacher is just too serious
She sent me out for this.
Miss: ( speaking some french thing ) kldjfhb ibcigbcnfmj ngcm olcmghing nicmj v
Miss: Now what is the answer........ do you know the answer???
Me : What??
Miss: Right thats it....... GET OUT!
Me: Why???
And as you can guess it just starts from there.
My maths teacher is just really really REALLY strange.
im guessing he bought hundreds of calculators to sell and now every lesson he try's to sell these things to you.
Here's what a typical 5 mins would be like.
Sir: Right class here's the sum now get to work.
Class: (random little comments and chatter)
Sir: Be quiet..... youre busy.
Sir: Busy Busy people.
Me: Sir i havent got a calculator.......
Sir: Well for four pound you can get this beautiful scientific calculator which does lots and lots of things.... if you pres this button for instance it will do this thing for you and theres lots of features.... remember only four pound will get you this nice calculator.... oh look i happen to have one right here on my dick do you want to buy it??? its only four pounds..... thats a bargain.......
And he never shuts up....... he now has posters of these calculators scattered round the room.
What a jackass.haha.
I gave him a bag full of pennies worth £4 just to shut him up but it didnt work.
When he's really being gay id call him it to his face and it would start an arguement.
Me coming out the victor of course.Just because of all the things you can call this guy.hahaha.
Finally we have Art.
I absolutely hate the idea the Art teachers in our school have.They make it seem like if you get a wheelbarrow and stick a pidgeon in it then its art.
Some of them even walk round with one earing that they made themselves in.
My teacher is really gay.
What he does in lesson time is just too embarrassing.
He would walk round singing something like spice girls out of tune like he was just saying the words and dancing.
I seriously think he's gay.
He's about fifty and hasnt got a wife but has a little companion of his little dog.
If you say something in class like "you woghead" and not even direct it at him (because he's bald) he will go on at you saying that you should say things like that because its actually a skit to a black person or something.
He just is really really gay.
If he's going on holiday he will skip around the class going "Yippee Yippee"
Im being totally honest.
Well there's some of my gay teachers.
Hope youve had a good read.
cya
i know its long but its good.
I hate some of my teachers.
We'll start with Chemistry:
The teacher is just too boring and not funny even though he thinks he is.
When he's talking and says if you dont understand anything then ask me a question and so he starts talking and i dont understand him and so i ask him a question.He answers me and continues.He makes no sense at al so i start asking him a few more questions like "Why is H20 called H20" and then he'll say something like "because its Hydrogen x2 and Oxgen" and it just starts from there.
He gets really mad because i want to know things.
And so i just keep asking him stuff relating to the thing i just asked.
So it would go like this
Sir:Because its 2x Hydrogen and 1x Oxygen
Me: So why is it called Hydrogen??
Sir: I dont know
Me: So why did you get employed here??
Sir: If you ask one more question like that i'll......
Me: DOUSH........(i hit him and he's pancaked on the floor) hehe
Me: why dont you know what the answer is???
Now we move onto French
My teacher is just too serious
She sent me out for this.
Miss: ( speaking some french thing ) kldjfhb ibcigbcnfmj ngcm olcmghing nicmj v
Miss: Now what is the answer........ do you know the answer???
Me : What??
Miss: Right thats it....... GET OUT!
Me: Why???
And as you can guess it just starts from there.
My maths teacher is just really really REALLY strange.
im guessing he bought hundreds of calculators to sell and now every lesson he try's to sell these things to you.
Here's what a typical 5 mins would be like.
Sir: Right class here's the sum now get to work.
Class: (random little comments and chatter)
Sir: Be quiet..... youre busy.
Sir: Busy Busy people.
Me: Sir i havent got a calculator.......
Sir: Well for four pound you can get this beautiful scientific calculator which does lots and lots of things.... if you pres this button for instance it will do this thing for you and theres lots of features.... remember only four pound will get you this nice calculator.... oh look i happen to have one right here on my dick do you want to buy it??? its only four pounds..... thats a bargain.......
And he never shuts up....... he now has posters of these calculators scattered round the room.
What a jackass.haha.
I gave him a bag full of pennies worth £4 just to shut him up but it didnt work.
When he's really being gay id call him it to his face and it would start an arguement.
Me coming out the victor of course.Just because of all the things you can call this guy.hahaha.
Finally we have Art.
I absolutely hate the idea the Art teachers in our school have.They make it seem like if you get a wheelbarrow and stick a pidgeon in it then its art.
Some of them even walk round with one earing that they made themselves in.
My teacher is really gay.
What he does in lesson time is just too embarrassing.
He would walk round singing something like spice girls out of tune like he was just saying the words and dancing.
I seriously think he's gay.
He's about fifty and hasnt got a wife but has a little companion of his little dog.
If you say something in class like "you woghead" and not even direct it at him (because he's bald) he will go on at you saying that you should say things like that because its actually a skit to a black person or something.
He just is really really gay.
If he's going on holiday he will skip around the class going "Yippee Yippee"
Im being totally honest.
Well there's some of my gay teachers.
Hope youve had a good read.
cya
pb wrote:
You don't need to know about
> writing style or get joy from a play, you don't need to have an appreciation of
> other people's religion, do you, of course not.
Yes, lovely.
I got a glowing report from my English teacher. I didn't take RE, unfortunatly.
You don't need to know about
> writing style or get joy from a play, you don't need to have an appreciation of
> other people's religion, do you, of course not.
Yes, lovely.
I got a glowing report from my English teacher. I didn't take RE, unfortunatly.
I just love ignorance. Of course you shouldn't have to learn anything, your learning comes from the streets, doesn't it. You don't need to know about writing style or get joy from a play, you don't need to have an appreciation of other people's religion, do you, of course not.
Yes, lovely.
Yes, lovely.
in French we fly them well far and the ones i make glide for ages
I got another RME one
Our teacher said that nothing was permanent. Some religion believes nothing is permanent (i think it was Buddha (i am not Racist), take no offence from my lack of knowledge of religion). So grant came up with an idea...
Impermanence is permanent
Unfortunately she as a student, so she almost burst into tears and ran. Dr Campbell (proper RME teacher) told him to be quiet. We all quietly sniggered
Our teacher said that nothing was permanent. Some religion believes nothing is permanent (i think it was Buddha (i am not Racist), take no offence from my lack of knowledge of religion). So grant came up with an idea...
Impermanence is permanent
Unfortunately she as a student, so she almost burst into tears and ran. Dr Campbell (proper RME teacher) told him to be quiet. We all quietly sniggered
we have really good paper aeroplanes in our lessons now, i can make really good ones and we sit at the back and throw them around and write messages to who ever gets sent to the front.
really good
really good
Heheh, I "overachieve comparative to his age" apparently, but apparently "his attitude leaves a lot to be desired". Simply because I have a reply to everything they say to me. Heheh, I even managed to get my R.E teacher to quesiton his faith :-D
"Do you belive in the theory of evolution"
"Yes"
"Do you believe in God?"
"Yes"
"How can you? The Bible says that God created man, but Darwin says that we evolved from primordial, amoebal slime. How can you agree with both?"
"I... Well... that's a good point..."
"Do you therefore belive that God is a single celled primodial peice of slime?"
"Of course not!"
"Then you can't believe that evolution is in fact real"
"Well...Errr... I suppose..."
"So, will you be going to heaven then?"
It carried on like this till the end of the lesson :-D
Then last year I managed to get the Geography treacher (he's really nice) to abandon the lesson and I led the whole class in a debate about whether tim McVeighs execution was justified or not :-D
My teachers are happy with my achievment, but most of them hate me forout-witting them :-D
"Do you belive in the theory of evolution"
"Yes"
"Do you believe in God?"
"Yes"
"How can you? The Bible says that God created man, but Darwin says that we evolved from primordial, amoebal slime. How can you agree with both?"
"I... Well... that's a good point..."
"Do you therefore belive that God is a single celled primodial peice of slime?"
"Of course not!"
"Then you can't believe that evolution is in fact real"
"Well...Errr... I suppose..."
"So, will you be going to heaven then?"
It carried on like this till the end of the lesson :-D
Then last year I managed to get the Geography treacher (he's really nice) to abandon the lesson and I led the whole class in a debate about whether tim McVeighs execution was justified or not :-D
My teachers are happy with my achievment, but most of them hate me forout-witting them :-D
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