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In a shock announcement today, Nintendo announced they had finalized a deal effectively giving them ownership of a cheese toasty.
Officials were glowing with smugness at a press conference several minutes ago as it was revealed the top execs at Nintendo had decided that with all the money made from selling off Rare, they could buy a hot, delicious treat on this cold December day. So a high ranking executive walked out of the huge office block that houses Nintendo, creators of such overhyped piles of tosh as Super Smash Brothers Melee and Zelda: Majora's Mask, and across the street to a fast food van. He took out his wallet and produced three hundred billion yen, or the equivelant to 80p here in Britain. He handed the cash over to the vendor, who put the bread and cheese into the toasty maker.
Apparently both parties were frantically attempting to thrash out a deal, with the vendor hitting the toasty maker repeatedly to try and make it work faster, and the Nintendo executive tapping his feet and staring at his watch for extended periods of time. Eventually, the vendor put pen to paper...well, toasty to paper...well, toasty to serviette...and put the money in his portable till. The Nintendo executive tossed away the reciept in a nearby rubbish bin, and walked back across the road to the Nintendo offices.
He walked straight to the top, where Miyamoto-san and company were holding a meeting on allocating even more of the Rare money. Various names were flung around such as Namco, Sega, even Acclaim as a joke, but all was forgotten when the executive walked in with the cheese toasty. It was immediately escorted to a cooker where it could be kept on a low heat to ensure no warmth was lost. Shigeru Miyamoto is said to be "extremely happy" with the purchase, with close friends of the gaming god claiming he "had been absolutely ravenous".
A press conference was quickly arranged, Nintendo hoping to ride this current wave of publicity after numerous buyout rumours, the lawsuit with Sony and the whole "Metroid Prime should be an FPS oh no it shouldn't oh yes it should" debacle. The leading world's press didn't bother attending as gaming is for geeks lol ph34r my L337 hax0r sk1llz, but a few people from Famitsue were there, a representative for IGN and some lucky beggar from CUBE magazine who got a free two week holiday in Tokyo to attend one press conference.
Amidst a lot of flashing lights, ladies in itsy bitsy teeny weeny yellow polka dot bikinis and Nintendo logos, the cheese toasty was unveiled. The purchase is regarded as a huge coup for the big N, with many claiming it the best thing since sliced bread...despite it being partly made up of sliced bread. Numerous features were displayed by Nintendo executives - steam rising up from the hot surface, the smell wafting around the room, and the melty bits of cheese that stick to the serviette and get all over you.
While we are still not one hundred percent sure of what Nintendo plan to do with this cheese toasty, nobody knows. Some say that they will be using it to make a new processor along with IBM. Others say that it will be the new intuitive gaming dynamic in Mario 128, replacing the FLUDD. There is a group that believe it has something to do with the potentially explosive Megaton announcement. However, one thing everybody can agree on is that it looked tasty.
Thanks for reading.
-El Blokey
Officials were glowing with smugness at a press conference several minutes ago as it was revealed the top execs at Nintendo had decided that with all the money made from selling off Rare, they could buy a hot, delicious treat on this cold December day. So a high ranking executive walked out of the huge office block that houses Nintendo, creators of such overhyped piles of tosh as Super Smash Brothers Melee and Zelda: Majora's Mask, and across the street to a fast food van. He took out his wallet and produced three hundred billion yen, or the equivelant to 80p here in Britain. He handed the cash over to the vendor, who put the bread and cheese into the toasty maker.
Apparently both parties were frantically attempting to thrash out a deal, with the vendor hitting the toasty maker repeatedly to try and make it work faster, and the Nintendo executive tapping his feet and staring at his watch for extended periods of time. Eventually, the vendor put pen to paper...well, toasty to paper...well, toasty to serviette...and put the money in his portable till. The Nintendo executive tossed away the reciept in a nearby rubbish bin, and walked back across the road to the Nintendo offices.
He walked straight to the top, where Miyamoto-san and company were holding a meeting on allocating even more of the Rare money. Various names were flung around such as Namco, Sega, even Acclaim as a joke, but all was forgotten when the executive walked in with the cheese toasty. It was immediately escorted to a cooker where it could be kept on a low heat to ensure no warmth was lost. Shigeru Miyamoto is said to be "extremely happy" with the purchase, with close friends of the gaming god claiming he "had been absolutely ravenous".
A press conference was quickly arranged, Nintendo hoping to ride this current wave of publicity after numerous buyout rumours, the lawsuit with Sony and the whole "Metroid Prime should be an FPS oh no it shouldn't oh yes it should" debacle. The leading world's press didn't bother attending as gaming is for geeks lol ph34r my L337 hax0r sk1llz, but a few people from Famitsue were there, a representative for IGN and some lucky beggar from CUBE magazine who got a free two week holiday in Tokyo to attend one press conference.
Amidst a lot of flashing lights, ladies in itsy bitsy teeny weeny yellow polka dot bikinis and Nintendo logos, the cheese toasty was unveiled. The purchase is regarded as a huge coup for the big N, with many claiming it the best thing since sliced bread...despite it being partly made up of sliced bread. Numerous features were displayed by Nintendo executives - steam rising up from the hot surface, the smell wafting around the room, and the melty bits of cheese that stick to the serviette and get all over you.
While we are still not one hundred percent sure of what Nintendo plan to do with this cheese toasty, nobody knows. Some say that they will be using it to make a new processor along with IBM. Others say that it will be the new intuitive gaming dynamic in Mario 128, replacing the FLUDD. There is a group that believe it has something to do with the potentially explosive Megaton announcement. However, one thing everybody can agree on is that it looked tasty.
Thanks for reading.
-El Blokey
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Hence you posting in a gaming forum, entering a topic about Nintendo.
El Blokey wrote:
> There've been several rumours recently regarding Nintendo buying out
> Sega, or Capcom, or Sega and Capcom, or Konami, or whoever.
>
> This is satirizing them.
>
> Get it now?
Nope i'm not really into Gaming.
Couldn't care less either.
> There've been several rumours recently regarding Nintendo buying out
> Sega, or Capcom, or Sega and Capcom, or Konami, or whoever.
>
> This is satirizing them.
>
> Get it now?
Nope i'm not really into Gaming.
Couldn't care less either.
satirising.
I apologise. Blame MS Word, though.
ize - American
ise - English
for example, organise.
ize - American
ise - English
for example, organise.
finalise
finalize is an american word.
finalize is an american word.
There've been several rumours recently regarding Nintendo buying out Sega, or Capcom, or Sega and Capcom, or Konami, or whoever.
This is satirizing them.
Get it now?
This is satirizing them.
Get it now?
Im cooking myself a cheese toastie now. MMM.
You have a weird sense of humour.
And yes i appreciate i've been intentionally harsh about your stuff previously without reading them, but i have read this and well......WTF?
And yes i appreciate i've been intentionally harsh about your stuff previously without reading them, but i have read this and well......WTF?
What r u going 2 do .......... i am not getting out of this topic
1122345 wrote:
> What is funny about writing about a cheese toastie
You noobs just want spam spam spam.
> What is funny about writing about a cheese toastie
You noobs just want spam spam spam.
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