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"Who Wants To Be A Xmas Millionaire?"

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Sun 22/12/02 at 16:45
Regular
Posts: 787
Tony: Hello, Kids. Merry Christmas! I’m the Easter Bunny. Where is Santa, you say? He’s dead, you little brats. And so is the Tooth Fairy. HA-HAHAHA!
. Anyway, here are todays guests, hand picked from SR’s finest. Oh, but the ones towards the bottom are only here so we can laugh at them! I must mention that people who have already appeared on the show will not be in the list. Because we’ve already laughed at them, it just wouldn’t be fair. Anyway, here tonight is:

AfroJoe!
Stryke!
Insane Bartender!
Mystique!
Hercules!
Time_Warp!
Drunk Cow!
Starlight!
Tony: Just so you don’t get offended, we’re going to put the ones here so we can laugh at them in there own pen.
Smerc!
Dave RJR!
dopeyjim!

So, onto the first started question. Please note that all of the questions today are Christmas based.
Put these in order, according to which day the True Love sent them on.
a) French Hens
b) Turtle doves
c) Gold rings
d) a partridge in a pear tree.

And, the answer is d, b, a, c. 4 people got this right, but in the fastest time.. dopeyjim!



Tony: So, dopeyjim. How do you feel.

dopeyjim: Fanally me and ma little juniors can have some real food!

Tony: Don’t count your chickens yet. You haven’t won anything.

dopeyjim: Nah, ah countelated ma chickens before I left, to make sure no darty thief goes and runs right off with one. There is 7 of them there purty little chickens. Come with me after the show, ah’ll show you...

Tony: Uh.. I’d love to, but my mother warned me to stay away from poorly dressed hillbillies who stink like fish. Sorry.

dopeyjim: Don’t you mention it, old pal. Now, are you gonna hurry yourself and ask me a question?

Tony: Sure.. Which of these was not one of Santa’s reindeer?
a) Rudolph
b) Jerry Maguire
c) Dancer
d) Dasher

dopeyjim: Well, that’s one of the difficultest questions I ever heared. I’ll say Dancer.

Tony: Are you su.. I mean, you go home with nothing. Now go. GO!
And onto our second starter question of the day..
Which of these did Ross dress up as in Friends when the shop had ran out of Santa costumes?
a) Superman
b) An armadillo
c) A snowman
d) An elf


And, the person who is coming onto our show next is.... Stryke! Come on up Stryke!



Tony: Cheer up, mate. It takes less muscles to smile than it does to fro..



Tony: ... First question. Which of these is not a traditional part of Christmas dinner?
a) Roast Potatoes
b) Turkey
c) Gravy
d) Mars Bar and Banana Delight!

Stryke: That’s a stupid question, you gimp. I shall see to it that both Yoda and Draco Malfoy are sent round to give you a proper smacking. The answer is of course D, as if it exists anyway. Speaking of existence, I am wasting my existence here, talking to the likes of you.

Tony: Sing the happy, happy, happy, hap..



Tony: Moving along..



Which of these is Santa’s name?
a) Gareth B. Jenkins
b) Nick
c) Albert
d) Nicholas

Stryke: Pfft. The answer is of course Nicholas.

Tony: Wrong! You leave with 1, 000 pounds. Santa’s real name is Nick. You gimp. Ha HA!

Stryke: But Nick and Nicholas are basically the same...

Tony: Do you see a K in Nicholas? I think not.
And now, a quick word from our new sponsor.



Man with dungarees: Hello, I’m Billy Bob, chairman of life experiences. For one week only, we’re giving you the chance to live out a dream. Become a hillbilly for a day with our exclusive competition. You get to live with hillbillies, eat like hillbillies, and shoot squirrels and use them to wash yourself like hillbillies. For more details, visit www.makemeahillbilly.com. Make your hillbilly dream come true today.


Tony: A-ha-ha-h.. anyway, moving onto the remainder of our show.
What colour is Santa’s sleigh?
a) Purple
b) Brown
c) White
d) Red
Well, every single person got that right. So, let’s see who got it in the quickest time. AfroJoe, come on up!
So, how do you feel about being on national Television?

AfroJoe: Mooo!

Tony: My thoughts exactly. So, onto the first question.
Which of these is not associated with hating Christmas?
a) Scrooge
b) The Grinch
c) Santa Smurf
d) Timmy the tree burner

AfroJoe: WHAZOOOGIOOOO!!!!

Tony: D, you say? Correct!

AfroJoe: Moooo!





Tony: You have no proof! I’m innocent! Er.. uh.. I’m too young to di.. I’m too valuable to die!

AfroJoe: Buggerations!



SR TV man: Hey you kid. You look too dumb to qualify properly for this show. Instead, present it.

Smerc: Wha...



SR TV man: Just read these cards.



Und no fore then ex quation.
Witch for teas is .. duck?





Off-screen voice: That’s all for today folks. I doubt we’ll ever be back, seeing out of our two presenters, one has been shot dead, and the other has been arrested for taking bribes. Who knows. Maybe some other brainless goofball will step up and present another show. But, for now, I hope you enjoyed the Christmas Special. Merry Christmas!
Tue 24/12/02 at 16:08
Regular
Posts: 9,494
Would it be an improvement?

:-)
Mon 23/12/02 at 18:15
Posts: 3,348
If only i was an elf
Mon 23/12/02 at 16:04
Regular
Posts: 9,494
Looks like we've got ourselves an unhappy little elf.

Have a candy cane.
Sun 22/12/02 at 22:13
Posts: 3,348
but it wasnt funny
Sun 22/12/02 at 21:45
Regular
"Festivus!"
Posts: 6,228
†HÊ_MÅÐMÃÑ wrote:
> auf deutsch wrote:
> Yes they are funny. Very funny. Funnier than I've ever seen you post
> Grapo.
>
> grapo didnt write it, it was asher D

I know, I meant Asher D's post was funnier than I'd ever seen Grapo post, as he called it un-funny.
Sun 22/12/02 at 19:47
Regular
"Max Power"
Posts: 2,196
auf deutsch wrote:
> Yes they are funny. Very funny. Funnier than I've ever seen you post
> Grapo.

grapo didnt write it, it was asher D
Sun 22/12/02 at 19:15
Regular
"bit of a brain"
Posts: 18,933
I don't get it.
Sun 22/12/02 at 19:12
Posts: 0
Yes they are funny. Very funny. Funnier than I've ever seen ou pos Grapo.
Sun 22/12/02 at 18:06
Posts: 3,348
Funny, yeh...
Sun 22/12/02 at 18:04
Regular
Posts: 9,494
Which is exactly why this was the last episode. Ever read Stryke Irwin, Bush Vs The Muppets or any of the other spoofs.

Okay, so this is the 4th one of these as opposed to only 3 other spoofy things in my lifetime. These are just much easier to make funny.

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