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Okay, due to time restrictions and the fact I was out almost all day, this is something I have put together in about an hour. It's short, stupid and there are some extremely bad jokes, but I hope you can enjoy parts of it. {:)
_______________________________________
“Okay,” Gerrid said, closing the front door simultaneously, “why is there a bunch of gibbering baboons residing in my living room?”
“Well…” Microchips looked a little confused, “there’s only one Sheepy here.”
Sheepy threw a vase at Micro, but it missed and hit Ant painfully in the side of the head.
“Ouch.”
“I’m not just talking about Sheepy, I mean all of you!”
“You invited us round!” Judah Ben-Hur replied, “remember?”
“No, I invited you round, no one else,” Gerrid thought for a moment, “wait…I didn’t invite you either! You just decided you’d come round, and now look at the place!” Gerrid threw a blank video in anger, and it cracked Ant in the back of the head.
“Ouch.”
“Shut up Ant, you were never invited, and nor were the rest of you! You’ve ruined my lounge…you’ve messed up all the DVDs-“
“That’s because they’re all crap,” Sheepy said.
“Apart from the Erotic Witch Project,” Kyz22 made his opinion known.
“Oi, Kyzz! That’s my DVD, for my pleasure only!” Gerrid realised the mistake he’d made, and kicked the coffee table with such force that it tipped over and smashed over Ant’s head. Unfortunately, this didn’t stop everyone laughing…even Ant, despite his burden.
“I know!” Gerrid suddenly lightened up, “lets all go to Drunk Cow’s house! It’s much better than here!”
In truth, he was right. Drunk Cow’s home was rather large, and had its own bar, snooker table, bowling alley and indoor football pitch. All Gerrid had was a coffee table, a sofa and a porno DVD.
“erm…nah, we’re fine,” Micro responded.
Gerrid swung his fist in frustration, and it accidentally connected with Ant’s stomach and knocked all the breath out of him, which didn’t help considering he was trying to lift a coffee table off his head.
“But why!? Drunk’s house is much better than here!”
“Ah, but your place has a very…contemporary feel to it,” er-no interjected.
“C’mon gerrid, join us,” Judah Ben-Hur sat back in the sofa, “We'll have a veritable gangbang of a time.”
Ant began to laugh his head off at this statement, but choked on his own saliva. He fell to the ground, struggling, and smacked his shoulder on the fireplace.
“No,” Gerrid stamped his foot as a way of authority, but Ant’s groin was in the way.
“Where do we go then?” Drunk Cow asked.
“Anywhere, lets just leave.” Gerrid escorted everyone out of the house apart from Ant, and slammed the door as he left. He slammed it with such power in fact, that the house collapsed in on itself with Ant inside.
_____________________________________
“Shall we go to the cinema?” Microchips suggested.
“Yeah, sure,” Gerrid agreed, and they made their way to the nearest theatre.
__________________________________
Gerrid stormed out of the cinema, hands firmly in pockets.
“It would definitely help if we actually brought some money,” Gerrid said, angrily.
“How was I supposed to know we’d need money?” Sheepy asked.
“Well don’t you carry your wallet with you anyway?”
Sheepy looked confused, “you what? No, I don’t carry my purse around with me. I put in my handbag, which I leave at home.
“What, along with your make-up set?” Insane Bartender asked, sniggering.
“Yes, along with my make-up set,” Sheepy replied as a-matter-of-factly.
“And your little bottle of perfume just in case?”
“Yes, and my little bottle of perfume just in case.”
“And your tiny little black and yellow striped thong?” Mystique asked, going a little over the top.
“Yes, and my tiny little black and yellow striped thong.”
There was an awkward silence, and Sheepy stared at his friends, puzzled.
“What? What!? WHAT!?”
“Well twist my nipples and brand me with a broken iron!” Kyz22 shouted happily, “but isn’t that Grix Thraves walking down the road!?”
The group looked to where he was pointing, and their eyes were greeted by Grix’s beaming smile. That was until Grix realised who he was smiling at, and turned around and ran away. Very quickly.
“I guess he didn’t see us,” er-no commented, shrugging his shoulders.
“ARE YOU COMING PAINTBALLING OR WHAT!!!???” SonicRav screamed out of his car as he pulled up beside him.
“NO!” The gang screamed back.
Ant had managed to escape from Gerrid’s house and was sprinting up the road towards them, Unfortunately, he didn’t see SonicRav back-up his car at a rather high velocity, and he was rammed into the brick wall with extreme force, before Sonic drove off.
Stryke then walked up to them, slapped them all insultingly around the face, called Ant a “rosary boy,” and then made his way into Tesco’s just in time to see FantasyMeister get fired. Again.
Then the biggest @ss-clown of them all, Vice, turned a corner and bumped into them.
“wot r u doin y don’t u get outta me way,” he said in his indistinguishable banter.
Ant then knocked him out with one shot, getting the revenge he so sorely deserved. That was until someone threw a TV out of the window above them.
The TV missed Ant, but the PC monitor that soon followed most certainly didn’t.
________________________________________
The group were a little out of their element. They were at a Strip Club.
“You know,” Sheepy said, twisting his hair into little knots, “I’m sure I’ve worked here before.”
“What’s that?” Microchips asked, pointing at a strange contraption that was working in one corner of the room.
“That’s a woman,” Gerrid informed him.
_________________________________________
After Ant had slid groin-first into one of the poles at the Strip Club, they left and made their way to some sort of Office Block, where Sean Connery was sitting outside, smoking a cigar and eyeing up Mystique, Rosalind and Arwen Undomiel.
“Hey ladies,” he began, “you like maths? Because I do. You see, me plus you, minus our clothes with our legs divided, means we can multiply.”
“Shut up Goatboy,” Mystique said playfully.
“Hey Myst, I like your legs. Can I wear them as a hat or belt?”
“So Goatboy, you ever do any work around here?” Drunk Cow asked.
“If it involves women, then I’m employee of the month, every month!”
After a while they gave up talking to the star of Die Another Day, but Evil_Dark was very happy because he’d managed to memorise a few badly needed chat-up lines. The last time he’d tried to flirt with a woman, namely AfroJoe, she’d slapped him in the face.
__________________________________________
The stars were out, and it was time that they all went home. In Grandprix’s case Silverstone, in Ant’s case his cardboard box, and in Jetster’s case Avril Lavigne’s bust.
“Nessht shtime shwe’re shtaying shat shours, Shgerrid,” Ant said.
“Is Ant drunk?” Kyzz asked.
“No, he’s still trying to wrench his head out from that public toilet,” Microchips told him.
Most of the group had split off, leaving just Mystique and Sheepy.
“Anyway, I better be off now Sheepy, see ya later,” Mystique said, putting her hair into a ponytail, adjusting her skirt and pushing up her breasts.
“Okay, bye,” Sheepy replied, putting his hair into a ponytail, adjusting his skirt and pushing up his breasts.
____________________________________
Thanks for reading, Ant.
_______________________________________
“Okay,” Gerrid said, closing the front door simultaneously, “why is there a bunch of gibbering baboons residing in my living room?”
“Well…” Microchips looked a little confused, “there’s only one Sheepy here.”
Sheepy threw a vase at Micro, but it missed and hit Ant painfully in the side of the head.
“Ouch.”
“I’m not just talking about Sheepy, I mean all of you!”
“You invited us round!” Judah Ben-Hur replied, “remember?”
“No, I invited you round, no one else,” Gerrid thought for a moment, “wait…I didn’t invite you either! You just decided you’d come round, and now look at the place!” Gerrid threw a blank video in anger, and it cracked Ant in the back of the head.
“Ouch.”
“Shut up Ant, you were never invited, and nor were the rest of you! You’ve ruined my lounge…you’ve messed up all the DVDs-“
“That’s because they’re all crap,” Sheepy said.
“Apart from the Erotic Witch Project,” Kyz22 made his opinion known.
“Oi, Kyzz! That’s my DVD, for my pleasure only!” Gerrid realised the mistake he’d made, and kicked the coffee table with such force that it tipped over and smashed over Ant’s head. Unfortunately, this didn’t stop everyone laughing…even Ant, despite his burden.
“I know!” Gerrid suddenly lightened up, “lets all go to Drunk Cow’s house! It’s much better than here!”
In truth, he was right. Drunk Cow’s home was rather large, and had its own bar, snooker table, bowling alley and indoor football pitch. All Gerrid had was a coffee table, a sofa and a porno DVD.
“erm…nah, we’re fine,” Micro responded.
Gerrid swung his fist in frustration, and it accidentally connected with Ant’s stomach and knocked all the breath out of him, which didn’t help considering he was trying to lift a coffee table off his head.
“But why!? Drunk’s house is much better than here!”
“Ah, but your place has a very…contemporary feel to it,” er-no interjected.
“C’mon gerrid, join us,” Judah Ben-Hur sat back in the sofa, “We'll have a veritable gangbang of a time.”
Ant began to laugh his head off at this statement, but choked on his own saliva. He fell to the ground, struggling, and smacked his shoulder on the fireplace.
“No,” Gerrid stamped his foot as a way of authority, but Ant’s groin was in the way.
“Where do we go then?” Drunk Cow asked.
“Anywhere, lets just leave.” Gerrid escorted everyone out of the house apart from Ant, and slammed the door as he left. He slammed it with such power in fact, that the house collapsed in on itself with Ant inside.
_____________________________________
“Shall we go to the cinema?” Microchips suggested.
“Yeah, sure,” Gerrid agreed, and they made their way to the nearest theatre.
__________________________________
Gerrid stormed out of the cinema, hands firmly in pockets.
“It would definitely help if we actually brought some money,” Gerrid said, angrily.
“How was I supposed to know we’d need money?” Sheepy asked.
“Well don’t you carry your wallet with you anyway?”
Sheepy looked confused, “you what? No, I don’t carry my purse around with me. I put in my handbag, which I leave at home.
“What, along with your make-up set?” Insane Bartender asked, sniggering.
“Yes, along with my make-up set,” Sheepy replied as a-matter-of-factly.
“And your little bottle of perfume just in case?”
“Yes, and my little bottle of perfume just in case.”
“And your tiny little black and yellow striped thong?” Mystique asked, going a little over the top.
“Yes, and my tiny little black and yellow striped thong.”
There was an awkward silence, and Sheepy stared at his friends, puzzled.
“What? What!? WHAT!?”
“Well twist my nipples and brand me with a broken iron!” Kyz22 shouted happily, “but isn’t that Grix Thraves walking down the road!?”
The group looked to where he was pointing, and their eyes were greeted by Grix’s beaming smile. That was until Grix realised who he was smiling at, and turned around and ran away. Very quickly.
“I guess he didn’t see us,” er-no commented, shrugging his shoulders.
“ARE YOU COMING PAINTBALLING OR WHAT!!!???” SonicRav screamed out of his car as he pulled up beside him.
“NO!” The gang screamed back.
Ant had managed to escape from Gerrid’s house and was sprinting up the road towards them, Unfortunately, he didn’t see SonicRav back-up his car at a rather high velocity, and he was rammed into the brick wall with extreme force, before Sonic drove off.
Stryke then walked up to them, slapped them all insultingly around the face, called Ant a “rosary boy,” and then made his way into Tesco’s just in time to see FantasyMeister get fired. Again.
Then the biggest @ss-clown of them all, Vice, turned a corner and bumped into them.
“wot r u doin y don’t u get outta me way,” he said in his indistinguishable banter.
Ant then knocked him out with one shot, getting the revenge he so sorely deserved. That was until someone threw a TV out of the window above them.
The TV missed Ant, but the PC monitor that soon followed most certainly didn’t.
________________________________________
The group were a little out of their element. They were at a Strip Club.
“You know,” Sheepy said, twisting his hair into little knots, “I’m sure I’ve worked here before.”
“What’s that?” Microchips asked, pointing at a strange contraption that was working in one corner of the room.
“That’s a woman,” Gerrid informed him.
_________________________________________
After Ant had slid groin-first into one of the poles at the Strip Club, they left and made their way to some sort of Office Block, where Sean Connery was sitting outside, smoking a cigar and eyeing up Mystique, Rosalind and Arwen Undomiel.
“Hey ladies,” he began, “you like maths? Because I do. You see, me plus you, minus our clothes with our legs divided, means we can multiply.”
“Shut up Goatboy,” Mystique said playfully.
“Hey Myst, I like your legs. Can I wear them as a hat or belt?”
“So Goatboy, you ever do any work around here?” Drunk Cow asked.
“If it involves women, then I’m employee of the month, every month!”
After a while they gave up talking to the star of Die Another Day, but Evil_Dark was very happy because he’d managed to memorise a few badly needed chat-up lines. The last time he’d tried to flirt with a woman, namely AfroJoe, she’d slapped him in the face.
__________________________________________
The stars were out, and it was time that they all went home. In Grandprix’s case Silverstone, in Ant’s case his cardboard box, and in Jetster’s case Avril Lavigne’s bust.
“Nessht shtime shwe’re shtaying shat shours, Shgerrid,” Ant said.
“Is Ant drunk?” Kyzz asked.
“No, he’s still trying to wrench his head out from that public toilet,” Microchips told him.
Most of the group had split off, leaving just Mystique and Sheepy.
“Anyway, I better be off now Sheepy, see ya later,” Mystique said, putting her hair into a ponytail, adjusting her skirt and pushing up her breasts.
“Okay, bye,” Sheepy replied, putting his hair into a ponytail, adjusting his skirt and pushing up his breasts.
____________________________________
Thanks for reading, Ant.
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Not getting into the Christmas spirit then?
Humm...fine.
Well
I dislike you moreso now
I dislike you moreso now
Heh, I assumed you were referring to my tagline.
I meant silly
rillock
rillock
WS wrote:
> Sally
It's Tuesday. {:)
> Sally
It's Tuesday. {:)
Well obviously
Sally
Sally
WS wrote:
> Why do you think he gets so many home-made jumpers for christmas?
Was that directed at Sheepy? :D
> Why do you think he gets so many home-made jumpers for christmas?
Was that directed at Sheepy? :D
Many thanks
How irrelevant.
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