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*Outside SR Towers*
“DW stands inches away from the entrance”
DW= I’m finally here getting a job at SR. What a dream.
“DW walks in and goes to the front desk where he sees a well dressed man filing papers”
DW= Excuse me.
Tony= Huh, who are you. AY, I told you girl scouts before I DON’T WANT ANY DUMB COOKIES!!!!
DW= Actually I’m a boy…and I want to get a job. I want to be a staffie and have the pleasure of choosing GADs and…
Tony= Hush, I don’t want your life story. Before you become a staffie and start banning and stuff you have to know a little about our business.
DW= Then I could ban people and choose GADs and talk to the forum members and…
“Tony slaps DW across the face”
Tony= Sorry, mate you were scaring me a little there. First I have to show you something. Loki bring me my graph!!!!
“An employee comes from a backroom holding a plush giraffe”
Loki= Here’s your giraffe sir.
Tony= GRAPH!!! I SAID GRAPH!!! And what did I tell you about calling me sir! You must call me Gentle Loving And Good Looking King Of All SR.
Loki= Sorry Gentle Loving And EXTREMELY Good Looking King Of All SR. Here’s your graph.
“Loki hands Tony a small piece of paper and walks away”
Tony= Can get good help around here these days…. Okay now this graph shows the success of SR since it’s first days. You know SR didn’t get like it is today overnight….. That’s mostly because SR closes before 7:00pm…… Due to my leadership skills I ALONE have made SR how it is today. Understood?
DW= Yes Gentle Loving And Good Looking King Of All SR!!
Tony= Good boy.
“Tony pats DW’s head”
DW= Purrrr.
Tony= Now that that is done we have to let you get more comfortable around your work environment.
“Tony leads DW up a flight of stairs and stops in front of a small smelly cubical”
Tony= This is a highly advanced employee keeping device called a cubical. I made the name myself.
DW= Actually the word cubical has been around for a while.
Tony= Do you question the word of Tony!!!!
DW= ……yes…..
Tony= Okie-dokie, lets move on.
“Tony walks over to the cubical next to DW’s. Inside there is a sleeping man drooling over a girly magazine”
Tony= This is Mr. Snuggly. He is untidy, unwanted, and worthless. He never works and he smells! You never want to be like him.
Mr. Snuggly=(mumbles) Oh…yea…baby..to..the left.
DW=… okay…Now can I ban people and choose GADs and…
“Tony punches DW in the face”
Tony=NO!! First you have to remember one thing. CRAP.
DW= Crap?
Tony= To everyone’s surprise CRAP is actually a coded sentence to help our employees. It stands for Customers|Really|Are|Profit. CRAP!.
DW= I get it now. CRAP!
Tony= Lets say a customer calls us on the phone and order 3 PS2 games. What do you think they will give us in return?
A. a brand new car
B. a fancy haircut
or C. profit
DW= C. C. C!!!
Tony= Correct. See how you could use CRAP to help you while working.
DW= Now can I begin banning and…
“Tony hits DW over the head with a brick”
Tony= Not yet DW now I have to teach you how to interact with your boss….me. Ask me for a raise.
DW= Mr. Tony…can I have a…
Tony= NO!!! NOW STOP SLACKING OFF AND GET BACK TO WORK!!!!!!!
DW= Eek!
Tony= Great job DW you learned how to interact with your boss. Now we have to discuss an “Emergency Situation”!!
“Tony walks over to the Fire Alarm and pulls it. The alarm booms through the SR towers”
Tony= I am now going to leave you and Mr. Snuggly to find out a way to turn this off. This will teach you how to keep calm under pressure. You will be timed. Begin.
“DW runs over to Mr. Snuggly which is still sleeping and shakes him”
DW= Snuggly!! Snuggly!! We have to turn off the alarm!
Mr. Snuggly= Who are you? Are you a bunny rabbit….
DW= No…I’m a new employee.
Mr. Snuggly= Oh, I’m not going to listen to anyone if they aren’t a bunny rabbit.
“Mr. Snuggly goes back to sleep”
DW= Look Snuggly! I’m a bunny.
“DW begins hoping around”
Mr. Snuggly= Lets put out that alarm Mr. Bunny!!
DW= Wooh!
“Mr. Snuggly and DW run over to the fire alarm”
DW= How do we turn this off. There is no way.
“DW picks up a pencil and starts beating away at the alarm”
Mr. Snuggly= Mr. Bunny, we are not cavemen…..we have technology!
“Mr. Snuggly points at the nearby computer”
DW= Great idea Snuggly.
“DW picks up the computer and starts beating away at the alarm. Seconds after it recedes”
DW= Technology rules!
“Tony walks over to DW”
Tony= Good job men. That only took you 20minutes.
DW= Now can I start banning. Can I can I can I can I….
“Tony slaps DW in the face”
Tony= Did you see the graph yet?
DW= Yes.
Tony= Did you see your work place?
DW= Yea.
Tony= Did you learn CRAP?
DW= Mhmm.
Tony= Did you perform love to me?
DW= Ye……what the..
Tony= Just kidding mate. You have ended your training session at SR. You are now …..a staffie.
“Tony hands DW a golden star sticker”
Tony= NOW GET TO WORK YOU WORTHLESS PIECE OF NOTHING!!!!!
“Tony walks away”
DW= I am finally a Staff member of SR. The privilege is overwhelming. I’m going to begin working right now!!!!!
Mr. Snuggly= Wanna go look at my girly mag?
DW= You’re on!
“DW and Snuggly run leftward”
THE END
Drunk
“DW stands inches away from the entrance”
DW= I’m finally here getting a job at SR. What a dream.
“DW walks in and goes to the front desk where he sees a well dressed man filing papers”
DW= Excuse me.
Tony= Huh, who are you. AY, I told you girl scouts before I DON’T WANT ANY DUMB COOKIES!!!!
DW= Actually I’m a boy…and I want to get a job. I want to be a staffie and have the pleasure of choosing GADs and…
Tony= Hush, I don’t want your life story. Before you become a staffie and start banning and stuff you have to know a little about our business.
DW= Then I could ban people and choose GADs and talk to the forum members and…
“Tony slaps DW across the face”
Tony= Sorry, mate you were scaring me a little there. First I have to show you something. Loki bring me my graph!!!!
“An employee comes from a backroom holding a plush giraffe”
Loki= Here’s your giraffe sir.
Tony= GRAPH!!! I SAID GRAPH!!! And what did I tell you about calling me sir! You must call me Gentle Loving And Good Looking King Of All SR.
Loki= Sorry Gentle Loving And EXTREMELY Good Looking King Of All SR. Here’s your graph.
“Loki hands Tony a small piece of paper and walks away”
Tony= Can get good help around here these days…. Okay now this graph shows the success of SR since it’s first days. You know SR didn’t get like it is today overnight….. That’s mostly because SR closes before 7:00pm…… Due to my leadership skills I ALONE have made SR how it is today. Understood?
DW= Yes Gentle Loving And Good Looking King Of All SR!!
Tony= Good boy.
“Tony pats DW’s head”
DW= Purrrr.
Tony= Now that that is done we have to let you get more comfortable around your work environment.
“Tony leads DW up a flight of stairs and stops in front of a small smelly cubical”
Tony= This is a highly advanced employee keeping device called a cubical. I made the name myself.
DW= Actually the word cubical has been around for a while.
Tony= Do you question the word of Tony!!!!
DW= ……yes…..
Tony= Okie-dokie, lets move on.
“Tony walks over to the cubical next to DW’s. Inside there is a sleeping man drooling over a girly magazine”
Tony= This is Mr. Snuggly. He is untidy, unwanted, and worthless. He never works and he smells! You never want to be like him.
Mr. Snuggly=(mumbles) Oh…yea…baby..to..the left.
DW=… okay…Now can I ban people and choose GADs and…
“Tony punches DW in the face”
Tony=NO!! First you have to remember one thing. CRAP.
DW= Crap?
Tony= To everyone’s surprise CRAP is actually a coded sentence to help our employees. It stands for Customers|Really|Are|Profit. CRAP!.
DW= I get it now. CRAP!
Tony= Lets say a customer calls us on the phone and order 3 PS2 games. What do you think they will give us in return?
A. a brand new car
B. a fancy haircut
or C. profit
DW= C. C. C!!!
Tony= Correct. See how you could use CRAP to help you while working.
DW= Now can I begin banning and…
“Tony hits DW over the head with a brick”
Tony= Not yet DW now I have to teach you how to interact with your boss….me. Ask me for a raise.
DW= Mr. Tony…can I have a…
Tony= NO!!! NOW STOP SLACKING OFF AND GET BACK TO WORK!!!!!!!
DW= Eek!
Tony= Great job DW you learned how to interact with your boss. Now we have to discuss an “Emergency Situation”!!
“Tony walks over to the Fire Alarm and pulls it. The alarm booms through the SR towers”
Tony= I am now going to leave you and Mr. Snuggly to find out a way to turn this off. This will teach you how to keep calm under pressure. You will be timed. Begin.
“DW runs over to Mr. Snuggly which is still sleeping and shakes him”
DW= Snuggly!! Snuggly!! We have to turn off the alarm!
Mr. Snuggly= Who are you? Are you a bunny rabbit….
DW= No…I’m a new employee.
Mr. Snuggly= Oh, I’m not going to listen to anyone if they aren’t a bunny rabbit.
“Mr. Snuggly goes back to sleep”
DW= Look Snuggly! I’m a bunny.
“DW begins hoping around”
Mr. Snuggly= Lets put out that alarm Mr. Bunny!!
DW= Wooh!
“Mr. Snuggly and DW run over to the fire alarm”
DW= How do we turn this off. There is no way.
“DW picks up a pencil and starts beating away at the alarm”
Mr. Snuggly= Mr. Bunny, we are not cavemen…..we have technology!
“Mr. Snuggly points at the nearby computer”
DW= Great idea Snuggly.
“DW picks up the computer and starts beating away at the alarm. Seconds after it recedes”
DW= Technology rules!
“Tony walks over to DW”
Tony= Good job men. That only took you 20minutes.
DW= Now can I start banning. Can I can I can I can I….
“Tony slaps DW in the face”
Tony= Did you see the graph yet?
DW= Yes.
Tony= Did you see your work place?
DW= Yea.
Tony= Did you learn CRAP?
DW= Mhmm.
Tony= Did you perform love to me?
DW= Ye……what the..
Tony= Just kidding mate. You have ended your training session at SR. You are now …..a staffie.
“Tony hands DW a golden star sticker”
Tony= NOW GET TO WORK YOU WORTHLESS PIECE OF NOTHING!!!!!
“Tony walks away”
DW= I am finally a Staff member of SR. The privilege is overwhelming. I’m going to begin working right now!!!!!
Mr. Snuggly= Wanna go look at my girly mag?
DW= You’re on!
“DW and Snuggly run leftward”
THE END
Drunk
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Thanks Dr.:-D---
Drunk Cow wrote:
> I'll never let this topic drop. NEVER!!!!
mmmm..topics
Oh, THIS topic, I thought you were on about the sweets.
Funny spoof anyway Drunky!
> I'll never let this topic drop. NEVER!!!!
mmmm..topics
Oh, THIS topic, I thought you were on about the sweets.
Funny spoof anyway Drunky!
okay
I'll never let this topic drop. NEVER!!!!
pop
Wow, thanks for the nice comments people.:-)
:) funny spoof there Drunk, well done.
Good spoof there DC.
Good stuff Drunk.
yet another great spoof, dc.
purrrr....
purrrr....
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