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After spending many months at the "Asylum for the critically obsessed Nintendo fans" I was realeased and decided to share my file with you.
Subject Name: Kyle
Date Admitted: 27/08/02
Date Released: 26:/01/03
Status: Mentally Stable(ish)
Test 1: Waverace
Kyle was locked in a room containing a Gamecube and Waverace, nothing else. The subject began playing the game and both heart rate and mental interest were normal. After 16 hours of gaming Kyle put the pad down and turned the console off however we had rigged it to be on non-stop and the subject was forced to continue playing. After 25 hours of continual gaming we allowed Kyle to stop playing the game. He was suffering fatigue and repetative strain injury but it was important for us to test the effects of the game immediately. The subject was taken to a lake with a jet ski in and strapped to it. Kyle automatically revved the jet ski up and was able to control it to a professional level. However after 30 minuted the fatigue overwhelmed him and he crashed the jet ski into the back of a boat. Our verdict is Waverace does teach user about the use of Jet Ski's however the game should be drip fed and not played in large amounts.
Test 2: Resident Evil
Kyle was placed in a room with the Gamecube and a copy of residevt evil. He instinctively began to play, selecting Jill Valentine as his character and started blasting zomibes. We dimmed the lights in the room and this caused the test subject to get quite edgy and start looking over his shoulders. We then got Geoff from Admin to sneak up on him, this resulted in Kyle screaming like a 6 year old girl and attacking Geoff with the gamecube controller. After 10 hours of gameplay Kyle has almost finished the game, however we ended the games testing here. We took him away, used a machine to keep his eyes fixed open and played Evil Dead 14 times in a continuous loop in front of him, prodding him when he fell asleep. After this we allowed Kyle to sleep but inexplicably he suffered from several nightmares and didnt dare get up to visit the toilet until morning light.
Test 3: Pikmin
A gamecube was set up in the lab gardens and Kyle was locked out with a copy of Pikmin. He began to play the game, happily gathering little Pikmin and killing grub dogs but by the time he had reached day 28 on the game he was particularly tired. We threw some coffee beans out of the office window to him (approx. 2kg) and he perked up quickly and began talking to himself very fast. After he had completed the game he began crawling around the garden plucking dandelions, daisys and poppies and grouping them. He also began talking to the flowers saying "Here little Pikmin, captian Kyle is going to find you". We let a badger loose in the garden for comical purposes and the subject began rapidly throwing the flowers at the badger and screaming when the badger munched them up. However when Kyle began kicking the badger screaming "die you git die" we cut the experiment short.
Other experiments were conducted involving Kyle which cannot be mentioned here due to their level of secracy or explicitness. Kyle's family are now attempting to sue us for kidnap, torture, depravation of sleep and mental anguish. Apparently he now wears dungarees and a red hat, speaks with an Italian accent and keeps asking where Peach is. Crazy.
Subject Name: Kyle
Date Admitted: 27/08/02
Date Released: 26:/01/03
Status: Mentally Stable(ish)
Test 1: Waverace
Kyle was locked in a room containing a Gamecube and Waverace, nothing else. The subject began playing the game and both heart rate and mental interest were normal. After 16 hours of gaming Kyle put the pad down and turned the console off however we had rigged it to be on non-stop and the subject was forced to continue playing. After 25 hours of continual gaming we allowed Kyle to stop playing the game. He was suffering fatigue and repetative strain injury but it was important for us to test the effects of the game immediately. The subject was taken to a lake with a jet ski in and strapped to it. Kyle automatically revved the jet ski up and was able to control it to a professional level. However after 30 minuted the fatigue overwhelmed him and he crashed the jet ski into the back of a boat. Our verdict is Waverace does teach user about the use of Jet Ski's however the game should be drip fed and not played in large amounts.
Test 2: Resident Evil
Kyle was placed in a room with the Gamecube and a copy of residevt evil. He instinctively began to play, selecting Jill Valentine as his character and started blasting zomibes. We dimmed the lights in the room and this caused the test subject to get quite edgy and start looking over his shoulders. We then got Geoff from Admin to sneak up on him, this resulted in Kyle screaming like a 6 year old girl and attacking Geoff with the gamecube controller. After 10 hours of gameplay Kyle has almost finished the game, however we ended the games testing here. We took him away, used a machine to keep his eyes fixed open and played Evil Dead 14 times in a continuous loop in front of him, prodding him when he fell asleep. After this we allowed Kyle to sleep but inexplicably he suffered from several nightmares and didnt dare get up to visit the toilet until morning light.
Test 3: Pikmin
A gamecube was set up in the lab gardens and Kyle was locked out with a copy of Pikmin. He began to play the game, happily gathering little Pikmin and killing grub dogs but by the time he had reached day 28 on the game he was particularly tired. We threw some coffee beans out of the office window to him (approx. 2kg) and he perked up quickly and began talking to himself very fast. After he had completed the game he began crawling around the garden plucking dandelions, daisys and poppies and grouping them. He also began talking to the flowers saying "Here little Pikmin, captian Kyle is going to find you". We let a badger loose in the garden for comical purposes and the subject began rapidly throwing the flowers at the badger and screaming when the badger munched them up. However when Kyle began kicking the badger screaming "die you git die" we cut the experiment short.
Other experiments were conducted involving Kyle which cannot be mentioned here due to their level of secracy or explicitness. Kyle's family are now attempting to sue us for kidnap, torture, depravation of sleep and mental anguish. Apparently he now wears dungarees and a red hat, speaks with an Italian accent and keeps asking where Peach is. Crazy.
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hmm, that's unusual? I should stay quiet, orI'll be ther in not to lo....ARGH!!!!!!!
After spending many months at the "Asylum for the critically obsessed Nintendo fans" I was realeased and decided to share my file with you.
Subject Name: Kyle
Date Admitted: 27/08/02
Date Released: 26:/01/03
Status: Mentally Stable(ish)
Test 1: Waverace
Kyle was locked in a room containing a Gamecube and Waverace, nothing else. The subject began playing the game and both heart rate and mental interest were normal. After 16 hours of gaming Kyle put the pad down and turned the console off however we had rigged it to be on non-stop and the subject was forced to continue playing. After 25 hours of continual gaming we allowed Kyle to stop playing the game. He was suffering fatigue and repetative strain injury but it was important for us to test the effects of the game immediately. The subject was taken to a lake with a jet ski in and strapped to it. Kyle automatically revved the jet ski up and was able to control it to a professional level. However after 30 minuted the fatigue overwhelmed him and he crashed the jet ski into the back of a boat. Our verdict is Waverace does teach user about the use of Jet Ski's however the game should be drip fed and not played in large amounts.
Test 2: Resident Evil
Kyle was placed in a room with the Gamecube and a copy of residevt evil. He instinctively began to play, selecting Jill Valentine as his character and started blasting zomibes. We dimmed the lights in the room and this caused the test subject to get quite edgy and start looking over his shoulders. We then got Geoff from Admin to sneak up on him, this resulted in Kyle screaming like a 6 year old girl and attacking Geoff with the gamecube controller. After 10 hours of gameplay Kyle has almost finished the game, however we ended the games testing here. We took him away, used a machine to keep his eyes fixed open and played Evil Dead 14 times in a continuous loop in front of him, prodding him when he fell asleep. After this we allowed Kyle to sleep but inexplicably he suffered from several nightmares and didnt dare get up to visit the toilet until morning light.
Test 3: Pikmin
A gamecube was set up in the lab gardens and Kyle was locked out with a copy of Pikmin. He began to play the game, happily gathering little Pikmin and killing grub dogs but by the time he had reached day 28 on the game he was particularly tired. We threw some coffee beans out of the office window to him (approx. 2kg) and he perked up quickly and began talking to himself very fast. After he had completed the game he began crawling around the garden plucking dandelions, daisys and poppies and grouping them. He also began talking to the flowers saying "Here little Pikmin, captian Kyle is going to find you". We let a badger loose in the garden for comical purposes and the subject began rapidly throwing the flowers at the badger and screaming when the badger munched them up. However when Kyle began kicking the badger screaming "die you git die" we cut the experiment short.
Other experiments were conducted involving Kyle which cannot be mentioned here due to their level of secracy or explicitness. Kyle's family are now attempting to sue us for kidnap, torture, depravation of sleep and mental anguish. Apparently he now wears dungarees and a red hat, speaks with an Italian accent and keeps asking where Peach is. Crazy.
Subject Name: Kyle
Date Admitted: 27/08/02
Date Released: 26:/01/03
Status: Mentally Stable(ish)
Test 1: Waverace
Kyle was locked in a room containing a Gamecube and Waverace, nothing else. The subject began playing the game and both heart rate and mental interest were normal. After 16 hours of gaming Kyle put the pad down and turned the console off however we had rigged it to be on non-stop and the subject was forced to continue playing. After 25 hours of continual gaming we allowed Kyle to stop playing the game. He was suffering fatigue and repetative strain injury but it was important for us to test the effects of the game immediately. The subject was taken to a lake with a jet ski in and strapped to it. Kyle automatically revved the jet ski up and was able to control it to a professional level. However after 30 minuted the fatigue overwhelmed him and he crashed the jet ski into the back of a boat. Our verdict is Waverace does teach user about the use of Jet Ski's however the game should be drip fed and not played in large amounts.
Test 2: Resident Evil
Kyle was placed in a room with the Gamecube and a copy of residevt evil. He instinctively began to play, selecting Jill Valentine as his character and started blasting zomibes. We dimmed the lights in the room and this caused the test subject to get quite edgy and start looking over his shoulders. We then got Geoff from Admin to sneak up on him, this resulted in Kyle screaming like a 6 year old girl and attacking Geoff with the gamecube controller. After 10 hours of gameplay Kyle has almost finished the game, however we ended the games testing here. We took him away, used a machine to keep his eyes fixed open and played Evil Dead 14 times in a continuous loop in front of him, prodding him when he fell asleep. After this we allowed Kyle to sleep but inexplicably he suffered from several nightmares and didnt dare get up to visit the toilet until morning light.
Test 3: Pikmin
A gamecube was set up in the lab gardens and Kyle was locked out with a copy of Pikmin. He began to play the game, happily gathering little Pikmin and killing grub dogs but by the time he had reached day 28 on the game he was particularly tired. We threw some coffee beans out of the office window to him (approx. 2kg) and he perked up quickly and began talking to himself very fast. After he had completed the game he began crawling around the garden plucking dandelions, daisys and poppies and grouping them. He also began talking to the flowers saying "Here little Pikmin, captian Kyle is going to find you". We let a badger loose in the garden for comical purposes and the subject began rapidly throwing the flowers at the badger and screaming when the badger munched them up. However when Kyle began kicking the badger screaming "die you git die" we cut the experiment short.
Other experiments were conducted involving Kyle which cannot be mentioned here due to their level of secracy or explicitness. Kyle's family are now attempting to sue us for kidnap, torture, depravation of sleep and mental anguish. Apparently he now wears dungarees and a red hat, speaks with an Italian accent and keeps asking where Peach is. Crazy.
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