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"Legend of Gerrid: Mystiques Mask. (SPOOF)"

PS 1:(Based on Majora's Mask as opposed to wind waker because I don't really know the plot of latter)

PS 2: ( Every personality is exaggerated and only represents mild truths, so dont flame me.)

*This is the story of a young boy. A personal story, a story of this boy's quest to find out the story of his adventure to find his only true friend*


***************** ************************ *****************


*Gerrid appears proud as ever, riding on his faithful and loving steed, WhiteStripes*

Gerrid: Yonder ho WhiteStripes, what be troubling you, by snorlsk?

*WhiteStripes buckles under Gerrid's load, knocking him unconscious. Mystique,(wearing a mask of gothic face paint) appears with two midgets, RoJ88 and Sylphetic. Mystique sucks Gerrid's blood for 10 minutes, then steals all his possessions, including his music producing Cheese*

*Geridd suddenly awakes*

Gerrid: Aha, I have suddenly awoken!!!!!!!!!!!!

Mystique: Would you like some opium?!!! *Exclaimed Mystique*

Gerrid: Yes.!!! *Exclaimed Gerrid in reply*

*Little did Gerrid know that mystique had actually spiked the opium with heroin*

Gerrid: Reminds me of the good old days back in Gerridsville.

Mystique: May I drink your blood?

Gerrid: Certainly yes.


*********************************************************


*When Gerrid was completely hopped, Mystique stole WhiteStripes (after drinking his blood), and galloped with him off to sainsburys.

*Gerrid awakes hours later not so suddenly*

Gerrid: Now that I have groggily awoken, I shall retrieve Whitestripes, lest I not be fawned upon in the forums for another minute!!!!!!

*Still hopped on opium, Gerrid falls into a tree which leads to sainsburys*

Gerrid: I'm in a different world, it's all surreal and everythings a twist on my previous postings, yet I'm still the same, even though it isn't, I'll call it irony, or even better, ironing!

*sylphetic jumps onto Gerrid's sholder*

sylphetic: I'll tag along with you because I have lost the only other noob that torticollis knows the name of, and mystique left me behind*

Gerrid: Fair enough, I grudgingly accept your plan, IRONING.


*************** ******************** ***********************


*As Gerrid's digital sun-dial struck midnight, an old lady appeared with a sack, and immediately she was robbed by a grinning buffoon who pranced around all the isles, making loads of new threads*

WIND WAKER: HOHo!11! NOqw awI can starat loads of new thfreasd abotu what I did today rofl.

* Gerrid pokes WIND WAKER with his stick of mild satire and WIND WAKER drops the bag*

Gerrid: Now that's what I call Ironing.

Rosallind (part 1): Thankyou child, You can have a mask for saving me.

Gerrid: No cheese?

Rosallind: This mask is a bit dangerous, but kid's like fire and banging nowadays, don't they?

*Gerrid recieves the bomb mask: Make your head go off with a bang!(masochist). Map items to the C buttons by going to the start menu, selecting the item, and assigning item to the desired C button. In desiring which C button to map your item to, this is linking an mapping your items to be able to wear/ use this item. To wear/use this item, press the relevant C button. To understand which is the relevant C button, a handy picture will identify which item is currently mapped to that C button. If you are blind and cannot see these handy C button icons, a brail version of Legend of Gerrid: Mystiques Mask (tm) is available through Japan.*

Gerrid: HOORAY!!!! Now I can *casually explodes*

*RoJ88 appears with all due haste*

RoJ88: Wine section, Frozen Foods, Dairy Products, And Lady Section! Awake The four giants within!

Gerrid: Why?

RoJ88: In exactly 3 days time, BEARDS will actually be respected as a peer.

Gerrid: By heavens, this cannot go on!

RoJ88: True.

Gerrid: Right you are.

sylphetic: Off to the Wine Section!!!

Gerrid: Who asked you?


***************** ************************** ******************


*On the way to the Wine Section, Gerrid spots a fairy. He quickly drinks a bottle of cheese, and imprisons the fairy without consent.*

Gerrid: Ok, we all know the song: You're a fairy in a bottle, I've got to rub you the right way, and you grant me three wishes and the moral is that the turtle tried hard consistently, whereas the rabbit was cocky and stopped for a rest.

Rosalind: I'm the only natural girl on the SR forums! You can't do this to me! I'm on the internet, I say I'm a girl, I'm not really, notice anything odd?

Gerrid: You have a willy?

Rosalind: Fair enough, I succum, Shaft me Gerrid.

Gerrid: I thought as much. Anyways, I have no time to waste, I have to do my latin homework as well as belittle members of the forum. I wish for all the giants within tampons or whatever be released. I am too cool to care. And to flog a dead horse, IRONING!

Rosalind: But Gerrid....

Gerrid: No Rosalind, I am a defender of the piece, not Shaft.

Rosalind: Defender of the piece of what?

Gerrid: If I told you, I'd have to kill you.

Rosalind: What do you wish for?

Gerrid: Can all those giants inside the places formentioned just be released? Don't ask why, I'm a reasonable man, get off, get off, get off my case.

Rosalind: Your wish be granted.

*WISH!*

******************** ************************** ****************


Four odd looking giants, wake up from:

A: Wine section: Sniper (E waz getin down wif the ladeez)

B: Frozen foods: Sheepy (froze himself trying to impress people)

C: Dairy products: AfroJoe (Tried to drown himself in milk after being voted least notable notable)

D: Lady section: Ky22 (Looking for the safest methods to do it with his million girlfriends)

Together, "Super Poster(TM)", and on the night of the third day, kick BEARDS in the testicles.

*************** ************************ ***********************

*It turns out in a shock turn out of events though, that it is not BEARDS behind the madness, but Mystiques evil mask, was actually a JAT in disguise!*

Gerrid: Gasp.

BEARDS: Why did you do that? That last sentence being an example of my intelligence:

*A: "WHY" This symbolises the bulger family as they head on an all expenses paid holiday

B: "DID" Michael Jackson. (Getting topical here)

C: Etc.*

*WhiteStripes gallops back to Gerrid, and kisses his a*se once more*

WhiteStripes: Take this mask, it will make you superGerrid, but you can only use it in this dissapointing boss sequence, and the other ones. I also have a personality. I quite like nintendo, but I LOOOOOVE Gerrid!

Gerrid: I will not need it, for I have my posts of confusion and mild satire!

*Gerrid confuses the JAT who explodes not so casually.*


******************** *************************** *****************

Everyone is happy, and gerrid rides off without any clear cut way of getting out of sainsburys, at all.

END!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Thankyou for reading.

Thankyou and goodnight.

Torticollis

Names aren't the point here, it was a poor post.

We don't want to hear your fantasies of gerrid riding me


And besides, my name isn't WhiteStripes

It was indeed quite poor.
I must admit.

There have been some great posts today, about one in FOG (of course, by Meka), and the rest in Life.

And I'm being critical today.
Even the 0069 sequel felt the wrath of my verdict.
So nar.

For first attempt, not bad.
All I'm saying.

It's not his first attempt

He has spouted much rubbish before

It could of been a longer spoof but It's still cool. Whitestripes....hehehe.

'tis my first spoof 'stripey, and you don't need to get all menstrual on me.

I'm not just going to say, "Ooh, that's crap" for no reason.

Here, I'll be kind. I'll give some constructive criticism.

1) Yes, it could've been longer, and you could have developed some of the scenes a bit more, taken them further without going too far.

2) The part with the asterix seperations, with the ABCD and the fairy etc, that got slightly confusing. I understood it perfectly well, but if it was made a bit more clearer, it would be better.

Also, you could have developed that part.

3) Your hanging around the same area of humour, try to expand, and explore different varieties and work with them.

OK, I'm going to stop now, before I start to sound like a teacher.

Thanks. I'll try to improve that if I ever make another one.

What should my next one be about

1000 words on why you're a knob


GO

Azul²°°³ wrote:
> There have been some great posts today, about one in FOG (of course,
> by Meka)

Read 'how to give up games for lent'. NOW!

Grr.