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"Cooking Tips with Monkey_man"

Hello children, welcome to Cooking with Monkey_man.
Cooking tip of the week #1:

Never cook a stir fry in just your boxers.

I'll leave you to stew ;) over that one!

Don't worry about Monkey's bizarre eating habits. Real life monkeys have to "redigest" their food in order to get all the nutrients out of it because their digestive system isn't very effect. That is why when they're not throwing their poop, they're eating it.

Conclusion: Monkey food must suck

Cooking Tip #11:

A good cook will always coat his/her hands in vasolene before kneeding dough.

Cooking Tip #10:

Jam evaporatres into Celery, but solidifies into roast beef, leaving it with an aura of mystery as to what it actually is.

Cooking Tip #9:

Many women find it attractive if you regurgitate your food to them in the style of a bird.

ok maybe not home poisening but home hurling with Monkey_man

cooking tip #1-9

Don't eat Monkey food.

Cooking Tip #8:

Toothpaste on biscuits (or crackers) is surprisingly nice. An added bonus of eating this concoction, is that the inner lining of your stomach won't be plagued by plaque.

tell me stuff i don't know Monkey man

maybe you should change the title to homw poisening with monkey_man, it seems more appropriate

;)CD

Cooking Tip #7

Most insects can be eaten, although 9 out of 10 Doctors don't recommend them as a stable of your diet.