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This is the second in my line of Monty Python spin offs, this time The Life of Brian will have a RiCkOsS make over, which will now be called The Life of RiCkOsS. Hope you enjoy. WARNING: This isn’t going to be anything like The Life of Brian!
After RiCkOsS’ death in his recent adventure with Kingklik, reincarnation had to come some time…
** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** **
As a star shone over the night, three holy farmers started to follow in their tractors. The star was shining over a small pub, named the Holy Pint. These three farmers drove for hours and hours following the faint shine of a star in the distance. The dingy night was slowly getting brighter, morning was coming. After hours of driving in their tractors, the three farmers arrived in Beckslihem. The star shone ever brighter as the three farmers began to park their almighty tractors next to the Holy Pint. As the morning became brighter, the star began to fade away into the blinding light that was the sun. The three farmers looked up at the Holy Pint and brought their hands to their faces in pray before entering the pub on the special morning. The three farmers slowly walk up to the bar.
“Three pints, please.” One of the farmers asked the bartender “Oh and you don’t know if there’s a baby being born in this pub do you?” The farmer asked.
“Yeah, actually, when you mention it, someone called Mary’s havin’ a kid. Upstairs, on ya’ right.” The bartender replied
“Okay then, save those pints, we’re just going to deal with some business to deal with.” The farmer exclaimed.
The three farmers made their way up the stairs but made a crucial mistake by going left instead of right. All three men open the door and start to grovel.
“Oh lord, please, accept the gifts we offer you?!” The farmer exclaimed.
“What are you doing here!? I’m on the toilet!” RiCkOsS screamed.
“Oh please my lord, accept are gifts, we are but humble farmers.” The farmer continues.
“Did you here what I said?! I’m on the toilet, that’s means go! If you need to talk to me, do it later!” RiCkOsS exclaimed. “Are you sick or something? Trying to look at my, big… bathroom!?” RiCkOsS continued.
“My lord we shall do what you please.” One of the farmers replied.
RiCkOsS closed the door and the three farmers stayed there, on their knees, waiting for RiCkOsS to emerge from the bathroom.
** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** **
About three hours passed and RiCkOsS finally emerged from the rather strange smelling bathroom. As he came out of the bathroom he nearly tripped over the three farmers who were still kneeling on the floor.
“Have you been kneeling there all that time?” RiCkOsS asked.
“Well yes, we’ve been waiting for you to come out from your palace.” The farmer explained.
“Well, err, what da’ want?” RiCkOsS asked.
“May we stand oh lord?” The farmer asked.
“Erm, yeh, lets go to the bar.” RiCkOsS said.
** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** **
RiCkOsS and the three farmers went down to the bar. They all had a pint of Vodka and then they sat down to talk.
“So, what are you lot called?” RiCkoSs asked while swigging a pint of Vodka.
“My name is Grix Thraves, and these two are my associates, Meka_Dragon and RastaBillySkank. May we ask your name my lord?” Grix replied.
“Err, why do you keep calling me lord? Oh it doesn’t matter, just don’t call me that. Oh, and my name is RiCkOsS.” RiCkOsS answered “Oh and why are your mates so quite?”
“I am the only one who can talk, Meka, well, is a dragon and RBS, is a Skunk” Grix explained, Meka answered with a roar and RBS let out a squeak.
“Well, your friend RBS is quite, ehh, flatulent isn’t he…” RiCkOsS said cautiously.
“He’s a skunk, what do you expect?!” Grix said.
“Anyway, why are you here? Why do you want me?” RiCkOsS asked.
“You were born under a star, which means you are the messiah!” Grix explained.
“No I wasn’t, I was having a s…” RiCkOsS began but was abruptly interrupted by Grix “OH! We’ve got the wrong one lads. Well see ya’ another time RiCkOsS. We’ve got stuff to do and, ehh, yeh...”
The three farmers started up the stairs, this time going the right way.
** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** **
This close encounter got RiCkOsS thinking, about more than life itself. It got him thinking about, the GameCube. Since the whole country was overrun by Microsoft, something had to be done. RiCkOsS’ dream was to play the GameCube, it just needed to be released, he could be their saviour. He had to face up to the Microsoft, bring the almighty to this forsaken land of the X-Box. The GameCube would be brought here. RiCkOsS knew he was on the Earth for a reason. But until now, didn’t know why. But then he thought about the Sony’s, just like him and his fellow Ninty’s, they would be killed if the Microsoft found them. It doesn’t bare thinking about what happens to the miscellaneous around here, Sony and Ninty fans. Poor Afro Joe, poor Stryke. Both Ninty and Sony. They perished in the worst way possible. Death by X-Box.
RiCkOsS stormed into the city to find some gatherers to stand up against the mighty force of Microsoft. He held a secret meeting in the town hall.
“It has come to my notice that GameCubes still haven’t been released in this country, and do you know why? Because of the Microsoft, they will not let it come through.” RiCkOsS explains to the crowd.
“But, what about the Playstation 2? Will you help us bring it back here like the GameCube will?” BB Scott asks.
“I must.” RiCkOsS murmured to himself “I MUST! No matter how much I don’t like it, I will do it!” RiCkOsS roars.
“Yay!” A humble cheer from the crowd replies to RiCkOsS and there was much rejoicing.
“But who will come with me? Who will fight along side me?” RiCkOsS asks.
Nobody says a word.
“Stubborn aren’t you!? Right then, no one will get a go on the GameCube, or PS2!” RiCkOsS exclaims angrily.
Finally someone spoke “I will!” Dringo said with tears in his eyes “The GameCube is my life, sure the GBA is a taster of Handheld Next Gen, but the GameCube, has to come here! With no GameCube, my life will be like paper with no comb, ice without water…” Dringo spoke as if it was his last day on Earth, tears rolling down his chin. Dringo stepped down, unfortunately he trips over and lands on his shoulder. More tears begin to run down his face, but everyone knew it was because he just nearly broke his arm on a concrete floor. The crowd started by one clap, but it gradually got louder and louder, a smile rushed across Dringo’s face.
After Dringo’s insatiable speech, more people began to rise and inform RiCkOsS that they would be coming with him. Before Dringo’s speech, this quest looked quite forlorn, but now many more people stood up claimed they would defeat salevaa and his mighty army.
“I will also assist on your quest for the GameCube RiCkOsS!” Sibs also declared.
“Ehhh, spose I will, I’ve got nothing else to do.” A rather bored voice of MJ called out from the crowd.
** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** **
A short while passed and RiCkOsS eventually built up his army of minions. His allies include Dringo, Sibs, MJ, Kid Rock, BB Scott and Longy. 4 Ninty, 3 Sony. They packed many accessories to overcome the Microsoft such as the SNES, NES GBA, PS1 and more. First they came to the entrance of the great kingdom of salevaa, there were many guards but not enough to stop then, 4 in all.
“Right, I’ll get the one on the left, you get the one next to him, KR. Dringo, you and BB go for the two on the right, Sibs, MJ, Longy, you stay here.” RiCkOsS explains.
RiCkOsS and KR run at the two on the left and hit then GBA’s and NES’ knocking them to the floor. Next, Dringo and BB Scott run to the right with a PS1 and a SNES. Dringo falls forward and plummets towards the ground, dropping the SNES, which thankfully hits a guard in the face. BB Scott smashes a PS1 Over the other guard’s head filling his head with sharp pieces of plastic and metal.
They all cautiously entered the eerie temple. Screams were coming from each direction.
“Oh god, what do they do to people in here?” RiCkOsS says in the form of a rhetorical question.
“NO! NOT THE X-BOX! NOOOOOO!!!” A scream comes from down the corridor.
“*gulp* death by x-box…” RiCkOsS murmurs quietly “The only way to find salevaa is to split up. Dringo, you Sibs and MJ go through the left corridor. KR, you BB Scott and Longy go through the right corridor, I’ll go straight on.” RiCkOsS explains.
** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** **
Dringo, MJ and Sibs slowly walked through the damp corridor looking for salevaa.
“RARARARARAR!!! I’m a huge scary monster!” Doughnut Monster roars.
“AHHHHH!” MJ, Sibs and Dringo all scream like women.
“If you want to pass I’ll need a poll off you! Doughnuts!” Doughnut Monster demands.
“Errr, could I lend a bit of money for some Doughnuts? Anyone?” Dringo asks.
“Here’s £6 if you want.” MJ replies.
“Thanks, I’ll just be a minute” Dringo exclaims.
** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** **
Dringo makes his way to the bakeries across the road in search of doughnuts. Dringo trips over on his way and unfortunately, breaks his ankle.
“Please! Could I have some doughnuts?!” Dringo begs.
“You need to see someone about that leg!” The Baker exclaims.
“No I don’t! That’s fine, I need a doughnut! Please! I need a doughnut.” Dringo begs evermore.
“Err, okay then, here’s your doughnut. That’ll be £2 please.” The baker asks.
Dringo roots around in his pocket “I’ve left my wallet back there! Hang on I won’t be long.” Dringo explains.
** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** **
Dringo eventually drags himself back to the bakery with his wallet in hand.
“Hi again, here’s the £2.” Dringos says.
The baker passes Dringo the doughnuts and Dringo sets of across the road to the temple.
** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** **
Eventually, after ½ hour, Dringo got over the road and brought Doughnut Monster his doughnuts.
“Here’s your doughnuts.” Dringo says while passing the doughnuts to DM.
“TWO! That isn’t many! Well, doughnuts are doughnuts. You can pass.” Doughnut Monster says.
The three brave travellers, MJ, Dringo and Sibs slowly made their way down the corridor to a small door with some letters carved in. All they could make out of it was “gen…” though.
“I know what this is! Genetic modifications! The Microsoft are making some huge, horrible monsters and we’re about to walk straight into it!” Sibs says cautiously.
“For the GameCube! Do it for the GameCube!” MJ declares.
All three of them slowly opens the door.
“It stinks in here.” Dringo points out.
“I told you! Genetic meddling!” Sibs says.
“No it isn’t, it’s the bathroom. Oh well, while we’re here. I’ll be back in a second!” MJ declares.
“Hang on.” Dringo says as rubs off some vines from the door “It says gents you idiot!” Dringo goes at Sibs.
“Well, ehhh, I’m baffled. Two doughnuts for this?!” Sibs says.
MJ emerges from the shadows and says “Shall we go? I am!”
“Yeh.” Sibs and Dringo says at the same time.
MJ, Sibs, Dringo and Doughnut Monster go for some doughnuts down the café.
** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** **
The three Sony’s are slowly walking down the corridor. Looking in all directions as a whizzing sound followed by a sharp brush of wind making the three tyrants hair blow from the breeze. As they go further and further into the depths of the corridor the whizzing sound and breeze of wind begins to get louder and stronger.
“What is that?!” BB Scott asks cautiously.
“Hello people!” The voice of ===SONICRAV---> echoes through the corridor “Chaos emeralds! I need them! Get me them!” ===SONICRAV---> demands.
“Well, where can we find them?” Kid Rocks asks.
“Outside, up a tree, I can’t climb tree’s because, well, I’m a hedgehog. So could you get them for me?” ===SONICRAV---> asks.
“Yeh. Okay.” KR answers “Longy, you climb the tree, you’re the tallest.” KR demands.
“Okay then, hang on.” Longy replies.
Longy runs outside and jumps up the tree to retrieve the chaos emeralds. Unfortunately, he slips off the tree and lands on he front on the ground. BB Scott and KR rush over to the limp Longy.
“Are you okay?” KR asks.
“No, I’ve really hurt my co…co…collar bone.” Longy explains
“OOOH! Does it hurt?” BB Scott asks.
“YES!” Longy screams “Give the chaos emeralds to ===SONICRAV---> and then at least we won’t have to worry anymore.” Longy tells BB Scott and KR.
KR and BB Scott give the chaos emeralds to ===SONICRAV---> hoping to pass.
“MWA HAHAHA! I won’t let you pass! I’m going to chase you for ages now you fools!” ===SONICRAV---> exclaims.
BB Scott and KR leg it while quite a way away Longy drags himself away.
** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** **
RiCkOsS is powerfully rushing through the middle corridor looking for salevaa. Any guards that got in his way would get a massive Gameboy MONO cracked over their skull. He’s a man on a mission. Finally RiCkOsS comes to a huge door entitled ‘Salevaa’s chamber’. RiCkOsS slowly pushed the door open and revealed salevaa.
“What is this?! Who are you!?” Salevaa asks.
“I am RiCkOsS! I have come for…for…some sugar. Could I borrow some? I’ve ran out at my house.” RiCkOsS asks.
“Well, yes you can have some sugar, hang on while I get some.” Salevaa replies.
But while salevaa’s back is turned RiCkOsS lunges at him with a NES in hands and smashes it over his head knocking him to the ground. Sadly, for RiCkOsS, seconds later a guard comes in and smashes RiCkOsS over the head with a PC knocking him out cold.
** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** **
RiCkOsS wakes stuck to some wood. It was what h had feared, he is going to die on the X. Just when he thought all was lost though the figure of slik and three other people emerges from the horizon.
“Have you come to save me?” RiCkOsS asks.
“Hello, RiCkOsS. Meet my frie…frie…friends.” Slik says in a drunken way “Meet Grix Thraves, Meka_Dragon and RastaBillySkank.” Slik says again like a drunk.
“Oh god, I’ve met these lot before.” RiCkOsS replies.
“Helllllllo ag..g..g..ain” Grix says to RiCkOsS. Meka answers with a huge drunken roar and RBS sqeezes something out that he shouldn’t have.
“Anyway, I’ve got to go now RiCkOsS, time for a little drink…” Slik says.
** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** **
After about 5 minutes slik stumbled out of view.
With tears in his eyes RiCkOsS started to mummer to himself. “It’s all lost…” RiCkOsS started “I won’t even get to seen screenshots of Mario Kart: GameCube, never mind play it. All I’ve got left to do is die…”
** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** **
Hope you enjoyed.
Thanks for reading
RiCkOsS
After RiCkOsS’ death in his recent adventure with Kingklik, reincarnation had to come some time…
** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** **
As a star shone over the night, three holy farmers started to follow in their tractors. The star was shining over a small pub, named the Holy Pint. These three farmers drove for hours and hours following the faint shine of a star in the distance. The dingy night was slowly getting brighter, morning was coming. After hours of driving in their tractors, the three farmers arrived in Beckslihem. The star shone ever brighter as the three farmers began to park their almighty tractors next to the Holy Pint. As the morning became brighter, the star began to fade away into the blinding light that was the sun. The three farmers looked up at the Holy Pint and brought their hands to their faces in pray before entering the pub on the special morning. The three farmers slowly walk up to the bar.
“Three pints, please.” One of the farmers asked the bartender “Oh and you don’t know if there’s a baby being born in this pub do you?” The farmer asked.
“Yeah, actually, when you mention it, someone called Mary’s havin’ a kid. Upstairs, on ya’ right.” The bartender replied
“Okay then, save those pints, we’re just going to deal with some business to deal with.” The farmer exclaimed.
The three farmers made their way up the stairs but made a crucial mistake by going left instead of right. All three men open the door and start to grovel.
“Oh lord, please, accept the gifts we offer you?!” The farmer exclaimed.
“What are you doing here!? I’m on the toilet!” RiCkOsS screamed.
“Oh please my lord, accept are gifts, we are but humble farmers.” The farmer continues.
“Did you here what I said?! I’m on the toilet, that’s means go! If you need to talk to me, do it later!” RiCkOsS exclaimed. “Are you sick or something? Trying to look at my, big… bathroom!?” RiCkOsS continued.
“My lord we shall do what you please.” One of the farmers replied.
RiCkOsS closed the door and the three farmers stayed there, on their knees, waiting for RiCkOsS to emerge from the bathroom.
** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** **
About three hours passed and RiCkOsS finally emerged from the rather strange smelling bathroom. As he came out of the bathroom he nearly tripped over the three farmers who were still kneeling on the floor.
“Have you been kneeling there all that time?” RiCkOsS asked.
“Well yes, we’ve been waiting for you to come out from your palace.” The farmer explained.
“Well, err, what da’ want?” RiCkOsS asked.
“May we stand oh lord?” The farmer asked.
“Erm, yeh, lets go to the bar.” RiCkOsS said.
** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** **
RiCkOsS and the three farmers went down to the bar. They all had a pint of Vodka and then they sat down to talk.
“So, what are you lot called?” RiCkoSs asked while swigging a pint of Vodka.
“My name is Grix Thraves, and these two are my associates, Meka_Dragon and RastaBillySkank. May we ask your name my lord?” Grix replied.
“Err, why do you keep calling me lord? Oh it doesn’t matter, just don’t call me that. Oh, and my name is RiCkOsS.” RiCkOsS answered “Oh and why are your mates so quite?”
“I am the only one who can talk, Meka, well, is a dragon and RBS, is a Skunk” Grix explained, Meka answered with a roar and RBS let out a squeak.
“Well, your friend RBS is quite, ehh, flatulent isn’t he…” RiCkOsS said cautiously.
“He’s a skunk, what do you expect?!” Grix said.
“Anyway, why are you here? Why do you want me?” RiCkOsS asked.
“You were born under a star, which means you are the messiah!” Grix explained.
“No I wasn’t, I was having a s…” RiCkOsS began but was abruptly interrupted by Grix “OH! We’ve got the wrong one lads. Well see ya’ another time RiCkOsS. We’ve got stuff to do and, ehh, yeh...”
The three farmers started up the stairs, this time going the right way.
** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** **
This close encounter got RiCkOsS thinking, about more than life itself. It got him thinking about, the GameCube. Since the whole country was overrun by Microsoft, something had to be done. RiCkOsS’ dream was to play the GameCube, it just needed to be released, he could be their saviour. He had to face up to the Microsoft, bring the almighty to this forsaken land of the X-Box. The GameCube would be brought here. RiCkOsS knew he was on the Earth for a reason. But until now, didn’t know why. But then he thought about the Sony’s, just like him and his fellow Ninty’s, they would be killed if the Microsoft found them. It doesn’t bare thinking about what happens to the miscellaneous around here, Sony and Ninty fans. Poor Afro Joe, poor Stryke. Both Ninty and Sony. They perished in the worst way possible. Death by X-Box.
RiCkOsS stormed into the city to find some gatherers to stand up against the mighty force of Microsoft. He held a secret meeting in the town hall.
“It has come to my notice that GameCubes still haven’t been released in this country, and do you know why? Because of the Microsoft, they will not let it come through.” RiCkOsS explains to the crowd.
“But, what about the Playstation 2? Will you help us bring it back here like the GameCube will?” BB Scott asks.
“I must.” RiCkOsS murmured to himself “I MUST! No matter how much I don’t like it, I will do it!” RiCkOsS roars.
“Yay!” A humble cheer from the crowd replies to RiCkOsS and there was much rejoicing.
“But who will come with me? Who will fight along side me?” RiCkOsS asks.
Nobody says a word.
“Stubborn aren’t you!? Right then, no one will get a go on the GameCube, or PS2!” RiCkOsS exclaims angrily.
Finally someone spoke “I will!” Dringo said with tears in his eyes “The GameCube is my life, sure the GBA is a taster of Handheld Next Gen, but the GameCube, has to come here! With no GameCube, my life will be like paper with no comb, ice without water…” Dringo spoke as if it was his last day on Earth, tears rolling down his chin. Dringo stepped down, unfortunately he trips over and lands on his shoulder. More tears begin to run down his face, but everyone knew it was because he just nearly broke his arm on a concrete floor. The crowd started by one clap, but it gradually got louder and louder, a smile rushed across Dringo’s face.
After Dringo’s insatiable speech, more people began to rise and inform RiCkOsS that they would be coming with him. Before Dringo’s speech, this quest looked quite forlorn, but now many more people stood up claimed they would defeat salevaa and his mighty army.
“I will also assist on your quest for the GameCube RiCkOsS!” Sibs also declared.
“Ehhh, spose I will, I’ve got nothing else to do.” A rather bored voice of MJ called out from the crowd.
** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** **
A short while passed and RiCkOsS eventually built up his army of minions. His allies include Dringo, Sibs, MJ, Kid Rock, BB Scott and Longy. 4 Ninty, 3 Sony. They packed many accessories to overcome the Microsoft such as the SNES, NES GBA, PS1 and more. First they came to the entrance of the great kingdom of salevaa, there were many guards but not enough to stop then, 4 in all.
“Right, I’ll get the one on the left, you get the one next to him, KR. Dringo, you and BB go for the two on the right, Sibs, MJ, Longy, you stay here.” RiCkOsS explains.
RiCkOsS and KR run at the two on the left and hit then GBA’s and NES’ knocking them to the floor. Next, Dringo and BB Scott run to the right with a PS1 and a SNES. Dringo falls forward and plummets towards the ground, dropping the SNES, which thankfully hits a guard in the face. BB Scott smashes a PS1 Over the other guard’s head filling his head with sharp pieces of plastic and metal.
They all cautiously entered the eerie temple. Screams were coming from each direction.
“Oh god, what do they do to people in here?” RiCkOsS says in the form of a rhetorical question.
“NO! NOT THE X-BOX! NOOOOOO!!!” A scream comes from down the corridor.
“*gulp* death by x-box…” RiCkOsS murmurs quietly “The only way to find salevaa is to split up. Dringo, you Sibs and MJ go through the left corridor. KR, you BB Scott and Longy go through the right corridor, I’ll go straight on.” RiCkOsS explains.
** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** **
Dringo, MJ and Sibs slowly walked through the damp corridor looking for salevaa.
“RARARARARAR!!! I’m a huge scary monster!” Doughnut Monster roars.
“AHHHHH!” MJ, Sibs and Dringo all scream like women.
“If you want to pass I’ll need a poll off you! Doughnuts!” Doughnut Monster demands.
“Errr, could I lend a bit of money for some Doughnuts? Anyone?” Dringo asks.
“Here’s £6 if you want.” MJ replies.
“Thanks, I’ll just be a minute” Dringo exclaims.
** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** **
Dringo makes his way to the bakeries across the road in search of doughnuts. Dringo trips over on his way and unfortunately, breaks his ankle.
“Please! Could I have some doughnuts?!” Dringo begs.
“You need to see someone about that leg!” The Baker exclaims.
“No I don’t! That’s fine, I need a doughnut! Please! I need a doughnut.” Dringo begs evermore.
“Err, okay then, here’s your doughnut. That’ll be £2 please.” The baker asks.
Dringo roots around in his pocket “I’ve left my wallet back there! Hang on I won’t be long.” Dringo explains.
** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** **
Dringo eventually drags himself back to the bakery with his wallet in hand.
“Hi again, here’s the £2.” Dringos says.
The baker passes Dringo the doughnuts and Dringo sets of across the road to the temple.
** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** **
Eventually, after ½ hour, Dringo got over the road and brought Doughnut Monster his doughnuts.
“Here’s your doughnuts.” Dringo says while passing the doughnuts to DM.
“TWO! That isn’t many! Well, doughnuts are doughnuts. You can pass.” Doughnut Monster says.
The three brave travellers, MJ, Dringo and Sibs slowly made their way down the corridor to a small door with some letters carved in. All they could make out of it was “gen…” though.
“I know what this is! Genetic modifications! The Microsoft are making some huge, horrible monsters and we’re about to walk straight into it!” Sibs says cautiously.
“For the GameCube! Do it for the GameCube!” MJ declares.
All three of them slowly opens the door.
“It stinks in here.” Dringo points out.
“I told you! Genetic meddling!” Sibs says.
“No it isn’t, it’s the bathroom. Oh well, while we’re here. I’ll be back in a second!” MJ declares.
“Hang on.” Dringo says as rubs off some vines from the door “It says gents you idiot!” Dringo goes at Sibs.
“Well, ehhh, I’m baffled. Two doughnuts for this?!” Sibs says.
MJ emerges from the shadows and says “Shall we go? I am!”
“Yeh.” Sibs and Dringo says at the same time.
MJ, Sibs, Dringo and Doughnut Monster go for some doughnuts down the café.
** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** **
The three Sony’s are slowly walking down the corridor. Looking in all directions as a whizzing sound followed by a sharp brush of wind making the three tyrants hair blow from the breeze. As they go further and further into the depths of the corridor the whizzing sound and breeze of wind begins to get louder and stronger.
“What is that?!” BB Scott asks cautiously.
“Hello people!” The voice of ===SONICRAV---> echoes through the corridor “Chaos emeralds! I need them! Get me them!” ===SONICRAV---> demands.
“Well, where can we find them?” Kid Rocks asks.
“Outside, up a tree, I can’t climb tree’s because, well, I’m a hedgehog. So could you get them for me?” ===SONICRAV---> asks.
“Yeh. Okay.” KR answers “Longy, you climb the tree, you’re the tallest.” KR demands.
“Okay then, hang on.” Longy replies.
Longy runs outside and jumps up the tree to retrieve the chaos emeralds. Unfortunately, he slips off the tree and lands on he front on the ground. BB Scott and KR rush over to the limp Longy.
“Are you okay?” KR asks.
“No, I’ve really hurt my co…co…collar bone.” Longy explains
“OOOH! Does it hurt?” BB Scott asks.
“YES!” Longy screams “Give the chaos emeralds to ===SONICRAV---> and then at least we won’t have to worry anymore.” Longy tells BB Scott and KR.
KR and BB Scott give the chaos emeralds to ===SONICRAV---> hoping to pass.
“MWA HAHAHA! I won’t let you pass! I’m going to chase you for ages now you fools!” ===SONICRAV---> exclaims.
BB Scott and KR leg it while quite a way away Longy drags himself away.
** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** **
RiCkOsS is powerfully rushing through the middle corridor looking for salevaa. Any guards that got in his way would get a massive Gameboy MONO cracked over their skull. He’s a man on a mission. Finally RiCkOsS comes to a huge door entitled ‘Salevaa’s chamber’. RiCkOsS slowly pushed the door open and revealed salevaa.
“What is this?! Who are you!?” Salevaa asks.
“I am RiCkOsS! I have come for…for…some sugar. Could I borrow some? I’ve ran out at my house.” RiCkOsS asks.
“Well, yes you can have some sugar, hang on while I get some.” Salevaa replies.
But while salevaa’s back is turned RiCkOsS lunges at him with a NES in hands and smashes it over his head knocking him to the ground. Sadly, for RiCkOsS, seconds later a guard comes in and smashes RiCkOsS over the head with a PC knocking him out cold.
** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** **
RiCkOsS wakes stuck to some wood. It was what h had feared, he is going to die on the X. Just when he thought all was lost though the figure of slik and three other people emerges from the horizon.
“Have you come to save me?” RiCkOsS asks.
“Hello, RiCkOsS. Meet my frie…frie…friends.” Slik says in a drunken way “Meet Grix Thraves, Meka_Dragon and RastaBillySkank.” Slik says again like a drunk.
“Oh god, I’ve met these lot before.” RiCkOsS replies.
“Helllllllo ag..g..g..ain” Grix says to RiCkOsS. Meka answers with a huge drunken roar and RBS sqeezes something out that he shouldn’t have.
“Anyway, I’ve got to go now RiCkOsS, time for a little drink…” Slik says.
** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** **
After about 5 minutes slik stumbled out of view.
With tears in his eyes RiCkOsS started to mummer to himself. “It’s all lost…” RiCkOsS started “I won’t even get to seen screenshots of Mario Kart: GameCube, never mind play it. All I’ve got left to do is die…”
** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** **
Hope you enjoyed.
Thanks for reading
RiCkOsS
Page:
LOL! Good post! I liked my bit ;)
Just need more emeralds, me!
Sonic
Just need more emeralds, me!
Sonic
i'm not in it........
and I let you on my PS2
and I let you on my PS2
Nice one Rickoss, although i too did prefer the first one. Still good though
Very good, bring me back i can still fight apart from that it's good
Well i thought instead of doing 100% humour i'd go for a steady. causal bit of humour and the rest abit dramatic :-P
Not bad mate. Personally I prefered the first one, because of the cutting edge humour :) Still, this one was cool. Sounded like console warfare :P At least if thats what knocking people out with consoles can be called :-D
That Microsoft Warlord sounded really cool - he had unbelievable strength!
Finally RiCkOsS comes to a huge door entitled ‘Salevaa’s chamber’. RiCkOsS slowly pushed the door open and revealed salevaa.
“What is this?! Who are you!?” Salevaa asks.
“I am RiCkOsS! I have come for…for…some sugar. Could I borrow some? I’ve ran out at my house.” RiCkOsS asks.
“Well, yes you can have some sugar, hang on while I get some.” Salevaa replies.
But while salevaa’s back is turned RiCkOsS lunges at him with a NES in hands and smashes it over his head knocking him to the ground. Sadly, for RiCkOsS, seconds later a guard comes in and smashes RiCkOsS over the head with a PC knocking him out cold.
:D
Finally RiCkOsS comes to a huge door entitled ‘Salevaa’s chamber’. RiCkOsS slowly pushed the door open and revealed salevaa.
“What is this?! Who are you!?” Salevaa asks.
“I am RiCkOsS! I have come for…for…some sugar. Could I borrow some? I’ve ran out at my house.” RiCkOsS asks.
“Well, yes you can have some sugar, hang on while I get some.” Salevaa replies.
But while salevaa’s back is turned RiCkOsS lunges at him with a NES in hands and smashes it over his head knocking him to the ground. Sadly, for RiCkOsS, seconds later a guard comes in and smashes RiCkOsS over the head with a PC knocking him out cold.
:D
This is the second in my line of Monty Python spin offs, this time The Life of Brian will have a RiCkOsS make over, which will now be called The Life of RiCkOsS. Hope you enjoy. WARNING: This isn’t going to be anything like The Life of Brian!
After RiCkOsS’ death in his recent adventure with Kingklik, reincarnation had to come some time…
** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** **
As a star shone over the night, three holy farmers started to follow in their tractors. The star was shining over a small pub, named the Holy Pint. These three farmers drove for hours and hours following the faint shine of a star in the distance. The dingy night was slowly getting brighter, morning was coming. After hours of driving in their tractors, the three farmers arrived in Beckslihem. The star shone ever brighter as the three farmers began to park their almighty tractors next to the Holy Pint. As the morning became brighter, the star began to fade away into the blinding light that was the sun. The three farmers looked up at the Holy Pint and brought their hands to their faces in pray before entering the pub on the special morning. The three farmers slowly walk up to the bar.
“Three pints, please.” One of the farmers asked the bartender “Oh and you don’t know if there’s a baby being born in this pub do you?” The farmer asked.
“Yeah, actually, when you mention it, someone called Mary’s havin’ a kid. Upstairs, on ya’ right.” The bartender replied
“Okay then, save those pints, we’re just going to deal with some business to deal with.” The farmer exclaimed.
The three farmers made their way up the stairs but made a crucial mistake by going left instead of right. All three men open the door and start to grovel.
“Oh lord, please, accept the gifts we offer you?!” The farmer exclaimed.
“What are you doing here!? I’m on the toilet!” RiCkOsS screamed.
“Oh please my lord, accept are gifts, we are but humble farmers.” The farmer continues.
“Did you here what I said?! I’m on the toilet, that’s means go! If you need to talk to me, do it later!” RiCkOsS exclaimed. “Are you sick or something? Trying to look at my, big… bathroom!?” RiCkOsS continued.
“My lord we shall do what you please.” One of the farmers replied.
RiCkOsS closed the door and the three farmers stayed there, on their knees, waiting for RiCkOsS to emerge from the bathroom.
** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** **
About three hours passed and RiCkOsS finally emerged from the rather strange smelling bathroom. As he came out of the bathroom he nearly tripped over the three farmers who were still kneeling on the floor.
“Have you been kneeling there all that time?” RiCkOsS asked.
“Well yes, we’ve been waiting for you to come out from your palace.” The farmer explained.
“Well, err, what da’ want?” RiCkOsS asked.
“May we stand oh lord?” The farmer asked.
“Erm, yeh, lets go to the bar.” RiCkOsS said.
** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** **
RiCkOsS and the three farmers went down to the bar. They all had a pint of Vodka and then they sat down to talk.
“So, what are you lot called?” RiCkoSs asked while swigging a pint of Vodka.
“My name is Grix Thraves, and these two are my associates, Meka_Dragon and RastaBillySkank. May we ask your name my lord?” Grix replied.
“Err, why do you keep calling me lord? Oh it doesn’t matter, just don’t call me that. Oh, and my name is RiCkOsS.” RiCkOsS answered “Oh and why are your mates so quite?”
“I am the only one who can talk, Meka, well, is a dragon and RBS, is a Skunk” Grix explained, Meka answered with a roar and RBS let out a squeak.
“Well, your friend RBS is quite, ehh, flatulent isn’t he…” RiCkOsS said cautiously.
“He’s a skunk, what do you expect?!” Grix said.
“Anyway, why are you here? Why do you want me?” RiCkOsS asked.
“You were born under a star, which means you are the messiah!” Grix explained.
“No I wasn’t, I was having a s…” RiCkOsS began but was abruptly interrupted by Grix “OH! We’ve got the wrong one lads. Well see ya’ another time RiCkOsS. We’ve got stuff to do and, ehh, yeh...”
The three farmers started up the stairs, this time going the right way.
** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** **
This close encounter got RiCkOsS thinking, about more than life itself. It got him thinking about, the GameCube. Since the whole country was overrun by Microsoft, something had to be done. RiCkOsS’ dream was to play the GameCube, it just needed to be released, he could be their saviour. He had to face up to the Microsoft, bring the almighty to this forsaken land of the X-Box. The GameCube would be brought here. RiCkOsS knew he was on the Earth for a reason. But until now, didn’t know why. But then he thought about the Sony’s, just like him and his fellow Ninty’s, they would be killed if the Microsoft found them. It doesn’t bare thinking about what happens to the miscellaneous around here, Sony and Ninty fans. Poor Afro Joe, poor Stryke. Both Ninty and Sony. They perished in the worst way possible. Death by X-Box.
RiCkOsS stormed into the city to find some gatherers to stand up against the mighty force of Microsoft. He held a secret meeting in the town hall.
“It has come to my notice that GameCubes still haven’t been released in this country, and do you know why? Because of the Microsoft, they will not let it come through.” RiCkOsS explains to the crowd.
“But, what about the Playstation 2? Will you help us bring it back here like the GameCube will?” BB Scott asks.
“I must.” RiCkOsS murmured to himself “I MUST! No matter how much I don’t like it, I will do it!” RiCkOsS roars.
“Yay!” A humble cheer from the crowd replies to RiCkOsS and there was much rejoicing.
“But who will come with me? Who will fight along side me?” RiCkOsS asks.
Nobody says a word.
“Stubborn aren’t you!? Right then, no one will get a go on the GameCube, or PS2!” RiCkOsS exclaims angrily.
Finally someone spoke “I will!” Dringo said with tears in his eyes “The GameCube is my life, sure the GBA is a taster of Handheld Next Gen, but the GameCube, has to come here! With no GameCube, my life will be like paper with no comb, ice without water…” Dringo spoke as if it was his last day on Earth, tears rolling down his chin. Dringo stepped down, unfortunately he trips over and lands on his shoulder. More tears begin to run down his face, but everyone knew it was because he just nearly broke his arm on a concrete floor. The crowd started by one clap, but it gradually got louder and louder, a smile rushed across Dringo’s face.
After Dringo’s insatiable speech, more people began to rise and inform RiCkOsS that they would be coming with him. Before Dringo’s speech, this quest looked quite forlorn, but now many more people stood up claimed they would defeat salevaa and his mighty army.
“I will also assist on your quest for the GameCube RiCkOsS!” Sibs also declared.
“Ehhh, spose I will, I’ve got nothing else to do.” A rather bored voice of MJ called out from the crowd.
** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** **
A short while passed and RiCkOsS eventually built up his army of minions. His allies include Dringo, Sibs, MJ, Kid Rock, BB Scott and Longy. 4 Ninty, 3 Sony. They packed many accessories to overcome the Microsoft such as the SNES, NES GBA, PS1 and more. First they came to the entrance of the great kingdom of salevaa, there were many guards but not enough to stop then, 4 in all.
“Right, I’ll get the one on the left, you get the one next to him, KR. Dringo, you and BB go for the two on the right, Sibs, MJ, Longy, you stay here.” RiCkOsS explains.
RiCkOsS and KR run at the two on the left and hit then GBA’s and NES’ knocking them to the floor. Next, Dringo and BB Scott run to the right with a PS1 and a SNES. Dringo falls forward and plummets towards the ground, dropping the SNES, which thankfully hits a guard in the face. BB Scott smashes a PS1 Over the other guard’s head filling his head with sharp pieces of plastic and metal.
They all cautiously entered the eerie temple. Screams were coming from each direction.
“Oh god, what do they do to people in here?” RiCkOsS says in the form of a rhetorical question.
“NO! NOT THE X-BOX! NOOOOOO!!!” A scream comes from down the corridor.
“*gulp* death by x-box…” RiCkOsS murmurs quietly “The only way to find salevaa is to split up. Dringo, you Sibs and MJ go through the left corridor. KR, you BB Scott and Longy go through the right corridor, I’ll go straight on.” RiCkOsS explains.
** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** **
Dringo, MJ and Sibs slowly walked through the damp corridor looking for salevaa.
“RARARARARAR!!! I’m a huge scary monster!” Doughnut Monster roars.
“AHHHHH!” MJ, Sibs and Dringo all scream like women.
“If you want to pass I’ll need a poll off you! Doughnuts!” Doughnut Monster demands.
“Errr, could I lend a bit of money for some Doughnuts? Anyone?” Dringo asks.
“Here’s £6 if you want.” MJ replies.
“Thanks, I’ll just be a minute” Dringo exclaims.
** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** **
Dringo makes his way to the bakeries across the road in search of doughnuts. Dringo trips over on his way and unfortunately, breaks his ankle.
“Please! Could I have some doughnuts?!” Dringo begs.
“You need to see someone about that leg!” The Baker exclaims.
“No I don’t! That’s fine, I need a doughnut! Please! I need a doughnut.” Dringo begs evermore.
“Err, okay then, here’s your doughnut. That’ll be £2 please.” The baker asks.
Dringo roots around in his pocket “I’ve left my wallet back there! Hang on I won’t be long.” Dringo explains.
** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** **
Dringo eventually drags himself back to the bakery with his wallet in hand.
“Hi again, here’s the £2.” Dringos says.
The baker passes Dringo the doughnuts and Dringo sets of across the road to the temple.
** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** **
Eventually, after ½ hour, Dringo got over the road and brought Doughnut Monster his doughnuts.
“Here’s your doughnuts.” Dringo says while passing the doughnuts to DM.
“TWO! That isn’t many! Well, doughnuts are doughnuts. You can pass.” Doughnut Monster says.
The three brave travellers, MJ, Dringo and Sibs slowly made their way down the corridor to a small door with some letters carved in. All they could make out of it was “gen…” though.
“I know what this is! Genetic modifications! The Microsoft are making some huge, horrible monsters and we’re about to walk straight into it!” Sibs says cautiously.
“For the GameCube! Do it for the GameCube!” MJ declares.
All three of them slowly opens the door.
“It stinks in here.” Dringo points out.
“I told you! Genetic meddling!” Sibs says.
“No it isn’t, it’s the bathroom. Oh well, while we’re here. I’ll be back in a second!” MJ declares.
“Hang on.” Dringo says as rubs off some vines from the door “It says gents you idiot!” Dringo goes at Sibs.
“Well, ehhh, I’m baffled. Two doughnuts for this?!” Sibs says.
MJ emerges from the shadows and says “Shall we go? I am!”
“Yeh.” Sibs and Dringo says at the same time.
MJ, Sibs, Dringo and Doughnut Monster go for some doughnuts down the café.
** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** **
The three Sony’s are slowly walking down the corridor. Looking in all directions as a whizzing sound followed by a sharp brush of wind making the three tyrants hair blow from the breeze. As they go further and further into the depths of the corridor the whizzing sound and breeze of wind begins to get louder and stronger.
“What is that?!” BB Scott asks cautiously.
“Hello people!” The voice of ===SONICRAV---> echoes through the corridor “Chaos emeralds! I need them! Get me them!” ===SONICRAV---> demands.
“Well, where can we find them?” Kid Rocks asks.
“Outside, up a tree, I can’t climb tree’s because, well, I’m a hedgehog. So could you get them for me?” ===SONICRAV---> asks.
“Yeh. Okay.” KR answers “Longy, you climb the tree, you’re the tallest.” KR demands.
“Okay then, hang on.” Longy replies.
Longy runs outside and jumps up the tree to retrieve the chaos emeralds. Unfortunately, he slips off the tree and lands on he front on the ground. BB Scott and KR rush over to the limp Longy.
“Are you okay?” KR asks.
“No, I’ve really hurt my co…co…collar bone.” Longy explains
“OOOH! Does it hurt?” BB Scott asks.
“YES!” Longy screams “Give the chaos emeralds to ===SONICRAV---> and then at least we won’t have to worry anymore.” Longy tells BB Scott and KR.
KR and BB Scott give the chaos emeralds to ===SONICRAV---> hoping to pass.
“MWA HAHAHA! I won’t let you pass! I’m going to chase you for ages now you fools!” ===SONICRAV---> exclaims.
BB Scott and KR leg it while quite a way away Longy drags himself away.
** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** **
RiCkOsS is powerfully rushing through the middle corridor looking for salevaa. Any guards that got in his way would get a massive Gameboy MONO cracked over their skull. He’s a man on a mission. Finally RiCkOsS comes to a huge door entitled ‘Salevaa’s chamber’. RiCkOsS slowly pushed the door open and revealed salevaa.
“What is this?! Who are you!?” Salevaa asks.
“I am RiCkOsS! I have come for…for…some sugar. Could I borrow some? I’ve ran out at my house.” RiCkOsS asks.
“Well, yes you can have some sugar, hang on while I get some.” Salevaa replies.
But while salevaa’s back is turned RiCkOsS lunges at him with a NES in hands and smashes it over his head knocking him to the ground. Sadly, for RiCkOsS, seconds later a guard comes in and smashes RiCkOsS over the head with a PC knocking him out cold.
** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** **
RiCkOsS wakes stuck to some wood. It was what h had feared, he is going to die on the X. Just when he thought all was lost though the figure of slik and three other people emerges from the horizon.
“Have you come to save me?” RiCkOsS asks.
“Hello, RiCkOsS. Meet my frie…frie…friends.” Slik says in a drunken way “Meet Grix Thraves, Meka_Dragon and RastaBillySkank.” Slik says again like a drunk.
“Oh god, I’ve met these lot before.” RiCkOsS replies.
“Helllllllo ag..g..g..ain” Grix says to RiCkOsS. Meka answers with a huge drunken roar and RBS sqeezes something out that he shouldn’t have.
“Anyway, I’ve got to go now RiCkOsS, time for a little drink…” Slik says.
** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** **
After about 5 minutes slik stumbled out of view.
With tears in his eyes RiCkOsS started to mummer to himself. “It’s all lost…” RiCkOsS started “I won’t even get to seen screenshots of Mario Kart: GameCube, never mind play it. All I’ve got left to do is die…”
** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** **
Hope you enjoyed.
Thanks for reading
RiCkOsS
After RiCkOsS’ death in his recent adventure with Kingklik, reincarnation had to come some time…
** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** **
As a star shone over the night, three holy farmers started to follow in their tractors. The star was shining over a small pub, named the Holy Pint. These three farmers drove for hours and hours following the faint shine of a star in the distance. The dingy night was slowly getting brighter, morning was coming. After hours of driving in their tractors, the three farmers arrived in Beckslihem. The star shone ever brighter as the three farmers began to park their almighty tractors next to the Holy Pint. As the morning became brighter, the star began to fade away into the blinding light that was the sun. The three farmers looked up at the Holy Pint and brought their hands to their faces in pray before entering the pub on the special morning. The three farmers slowly walk up to the bar.
“Three pints, please.” One of the farmers asked the bartender “Oh and you don’t know if there’s a baby being born in this pub do you?” The farmer asked.
“Yeah, actually, when you mention it, someone called Mary’s havin’ a kid. Upstairs, on ya’ right.” The bartender replied
“Okay then, save those pints, we’re just going to deal with some business to deal with.” The farmer exclaimed.
The three farmers made their way up the stairs but made a crucial mistake by going left instead of right. All three men open the door and start to grovel.
“Oh lord, please, accept the gifts we offer you?!” The farmer exclaimed.
“What are you doing here!? I’m on the toilet!” RiCkOsS screamed.
“Oh please my lord, accept are gifts, we are but humble farmers.” The farmer continues.
“Did you here what I said?! I’m on the toilet, that’s means go! If you need to talk to me, do it later!” RiCkOsS exclaimed. “Are you sick or something? Trying to look at my, big… bathroom!?” RiCkOsS continued.
“My lord we shall do what you please.” One of the farmers replied.
RiCkOsS closed the door and the three farmers stayed there, on their knees, waiting for RiCkOsS to emerge from the bathroom.
** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** **
About three hours passed and RiCkOsS finally emerged from the rather strange smelling bathroom. As he came out of the bathroom he nearly tripped over the three farmers who were still kneeling on the floor.
“Have you been kneeling there all that time?” RiCkOsS asked.
“Well yes, we’ve been waiting for you to come out from your palace.” The farmer explained.
“Well, err, what da’ want?” RiCkOsS asked.
“May we stand oh lord?” The farmer asked.
“Erm, yeh, lets go to the bar.” RiCkOsS said.
** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** **
RiCkOsS and the three farmers went down to the bar. They all had a pint of Vodka and then they sat down to talk.
“So, what are you lot called?” RiCkoSs asked while swigging a pint of Vodka.
“My name is Grix Thraves, and these two are my associates, Meka_Dragon and RastaBillySkank. May we ask your name my lord?” Grix replied.
“Err, why do you keep calling me lord? Oh it doesn’t matter, just don’t call me that. Oh, and my name is RiCkOsS.” RiCkOsS answered “Oh and why are your mates so quite?”
“I am the only one who can talk, Meka, well, is a dragon and RBS, is a Skunk” Grix explained, Meka answered with a roar and RBS let out a squeak.
“Well, your friend RBS is quite, ehh, flatulent isn’t he…” RiCkOsS said cautiously.
“He’s a skunk, what do you expect?!” Grix said.
“Anyway, why are you here? Why do you want me?” RiCkOsS asked.
“You were born under a star, which means you are the messiah!” Grix explained.
“No I wasn’t, I was having a s…” RiCkOsS began but was abruptly interrupted by Grix “OH! We’ve got the wrong one lads. Well see ya’ another time RiCkOsS. We’ve got stuff to do and, ehh, yeh...”
The three farmers started up the stairs, this time going the right way.
** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** **
This close encounter got RiCkOsS thinking, about more than life itself. It got him thinking about, the GameCube. Since the whole country was overrun by Microsoft, something had to be done. RiCkOsS’ dream was to play the GameCube, it just needed to be released, he could be their saviour. He had to face up to the Microsoft, bring the almighty to this forsaken land of the X-Box. The GameCube would be brought here. RiCkOsS knew he was on the Earth for a reason. But until now, didn’t know why. But then he thought about the Sony’s, just like him and his fellow Ninty’s, they would be killed if the Microsoft found them. It doesn’t bare thinking about what happens to the miscellaneous around here, Sony and Ninty fans. Poor Afro Joe, poor Stryke. Both Ninty and Sony. They perished in the worst way possible. Death by X-Box.
RiCkOsS stormed into the city to find some gatherers to stand up against the mighty force of Microsoft. He held a secret meeting in the town hall.
“It has come to my notice that GameCubes still haven’t been released in this country, and do you know why? Because of the Microsoft, they will not let it come through.” RiCkOsS explains to the crowd.
“But, what about the Playstation 2? Will you help us bring it back here like the GameCube will?” BB Scott asks.
“I must.” RiCkOsS murmured to himself “I MUST! No matter how much I don’t like it, I will do it!” RiCkOsS roars.
“Yay!” A humble cheer from the crowd replies to RiCkOsS and there was much rejoicing.
“But who will come with me? Who will fight along side me?” RiCkOsS asks.
Nobody says a word.
“Stubborn aren’t you!? Right then, no one will get a go on the GameCube, or PS2!” RiCkOsS exclaims angrily.
Finally someone spoke “I will!” Dringo said with tears in his eyes “The GameCube is my life, sure the GBA is a taster of Handheld Next Gen, but the GameCube, has to come here! With no GameCube, my life will be like paper with no comb, ice without water…” Dringo spoke as if it was his last day on Earth, tears rolling down his chin. Dringo stepped down, unfortunately he trips over and lands on his shoulder. More tears begin to run down his face, but everyone knew it was because he just nearly broke his arm on a concrete floor. The crowd started by one clap, but it gradually got louder and louder, a smile rushed across Dringo’s face.
After Dringo’s insatiable speech, more people began to rise and inform RiCkOsS that they would be coming with him. Before Dringo’s speech, this quest looked quite forlorn, but now many more people stood up claimed they would defeat salevaa and his mighty army.
“I will also assist on your quest for the GameCube RiCkOsS!” Sibs also declared.
“Ehhh, spose I will, I’ve got nothing else to do.” A rather bored voice of MJ called out from the crowd.
** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** **
A short while passed and RiCkOsS eventually built up his army of minions. His allies include Dringo, Sibs, MJ, Kid Rock, BB Scott and Longy. 4 Ninty, 3 Sony. They packed many accessories to overcome the Microsoft such as the SNES, NES GBA, PS1 and more. First they came to the entrance of the great kingdom of salevaa, there were many guards but not enough to stop then, 4 in all.
“Right, I’ll get the one on the left, you get the one next to him, KR. Dringo, you and BB go for the two on the right, Sibs, MJ, Longy, you stay here.” RiCkOsS explains.
RiCkOsS and KR run at the two on the left and hit then GBA’s and NES’ knocking them to the floor. Next, Dringo and BB Scott run to the right with a PS1 and a SNES. Dringo falls forward and plummets towards the ground, dropping the SNES, which thankfully hits a guard in the face. BB Scott smashes a PS1 Over the other guard’s head filling his head with sharp pieces of plastic and metal.
They all cautiously entered the eerie temple. Screams were coming from each direction.
“Oh god, what do they do to people in here?” RiCkOsS says in the form of a rhetorical question.
“NO! NOT THE X-BOX! NOOOOOO!!!” A scream comes from down the corridor.
“*gulp* death by x-box…” RiCkOsS murmurs quietly “The only way to find salevaa is to split up. Dringo, you Sibs and MJ go through the left corridor. KR, you BB Scott and Longy go through the right corridor, I’ll go straight on.” RiCkOsS explains.
** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** **
Dringo, MJ and Sibs slowly walked through the damp corridor looking for salevaa.
“RARARARARAR!!! I’m a huge scary monster!” Doughnut Monster roars.
“AHHHHH!” MJ, Sibs and Dringo all scream like women.
“If you want to pass I’ll need a poll off you! Doughnuts!” Doughnut Monster demands.
“Errr, could I lend a bit of money for some Doughnuts? Anyone?” Dringo asks.
“Here’s £6 if you want.” MJ replies.
“Thanks, I’ll just be a minute” Dringo exclaims.
** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** **
Dringo makes his way to the bakeries across the road in search of doughnuts. Dringo trips over on his way and unfortunately, breaks his ankle.
“Please! Could I have some doughnuts?!” Dringo begs.
“You need to see someone about that leg!” The Baker exclaims.
“No I don’t! That’s fine, I need a doughnut! Please! I need a doughnut.” Dringo begs evermore.
“Err, okay then, here’s your doughnut. That’ll be £2 please.” The baker asks.
Dringo roots around in his pocket “I’ve left my wallet back there! Hang on I won’t be long.” Dringo explains.
** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** **
Dringo eventually drags himself back to the bakery with his wallet in hand.
“Hi again, here’s the £2.” Dringos says.
The baker passes Dringo the doughnuts and Dringo sets of across the road to the temple.
** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** **
Eventually, after ½ hour, Dringo got over the road and brought Doughnut Monster his doughnuts.
“Here’s your doughnuts.” Dringo says while passing the doughnuts to DM.
“TWO! That isn’t many! Well, doughnuts are doughnuts. You can pass.” Doughnut Monster says.
The three brave travellers, MJ, Dringo and Sibs slowly made their way down the corridor to a small door with some letters carved in. All they could make out of it was “gen…” though.
“I know what this is! Genetic modifications! The Microsoft are making some huge, horrible monsters and we’re about to walk straight into it!” Sibs says cautiously.
“For the GameCube! Do it for the GameCube!” MJ declares.
All three of them slowly opens the door.
“It stinks in here.” Dringo points out.
“I told you! Genetic meddling!” Sibs says.
“No it isn’t, it’s the bathroom. Oh well, while we’re here. I’ll be back in a second!” MJ declares.
“Hang on.” Dringo says as rubs off some vines from the door “It says gents you idiot!” Dringo goes at Sibs.
“Well, ehhh, I’m baffled. Two doughnuts for this?!” Sibs says.
MJ emerges from the shadows and says “Shall we go? I am!”
“Yeh.” Sibs and Dringo says at the same time.
MJ, Sibs, Dringo and Doughnut Monster go for some doughnuts down the café.
** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** **
The three Sony’s are slowly walking down the corridor. Looking in all directions as a whizzing sound followed by a sharp brush of wind making the three tyrants hair blow from the breeze. As they go further and further into the depths of the corridor the whizzing sound and breeze of wind begins to get louder and stronger.
“What is that?!” BB Scott asks cautiously.
“Hello people!” The voice of ===SONICRAV---> echoes through the corridor “Chaos emeralds! I need them! Get me them!” ===SONICRAV---> demands.
“Well, where can we find them?” Kid Rocks asks.
“Outside, up a tree, I can’t climb tree’s because, well, I’m a hedgehog. So could you get them for me?” ===SONICRAV---> asks.
“Yeh. Okay.” KR answers “Longy, you climb the tree, you’re the tallest.” KR demands.
“Okay then, hang on.” Longy replies.
Longy runs outside and jumps up the tree to retrieve the chaos emeralds. Unfortunately, he slips off the tree and lands on he front on the ground. BB Scott and KR rush over to the limp Longy.
“Are you okay?” KR asks.
“No, I’ve really hurt my co…co…collar bone.” Longy explains
“OOOH! Does it hurt?” BB Scott asks.
“YES!” Longy screams “Give the chaos emeralds to ===SONICRAV---> and then at least we won’t have to worry anymore.” Longy tells BB Scott and KR.
KR and BB Scott give the chaos emeralds to ===SONICRAV---> hoping to pass.
“MWA HAHAHA! I won’t let you pass! I’m going to chase you for ages now you fools!” ===SONICRAV---> exclaims.
BB Scott and KR leg it while quite a way away Longy drags himself away.
** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** **
RiCkOsS is powerfully rushing through the middle corridor looking for salevaa. Any guards that got in his way would get a massive Gameboy MONO cracked over their skull. He’s a man on a mission. Finally RiCkOsS comes to a huge door entitled ‘Salevaa’s chamber’. RiCkOsS slowly pushed the door open and revealed salevaa.
“What is this?! Who are you!?” Salevaa asks.
“I am RiCkOsS! I have come for…for…some sugar. Could I borrow some? I’ve ran out at my house.” RiCkOsS asks.
“Well, yes you can have some sugar, hang on while I get some.” Salevaa replies.
But while salevaa’s back is turned RiCkOsS lunges at him with a NES in hands and smashes it over his head knocking him to the ground. Sadly, for RiCkOsS, seconds later a guard comes in and smashes RiCkOsS over the head with a PC knocking him out cold.
** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** **
RiCkOsS wakes stuck to some wood. It was what h had feared, he is going to die on the X. Just when he thought all was lost though the figure of slik and three other people emerges from the horizon.
“Have you come to save me?” RiCkOsS asks.
“Hello, RiCkOsS. Meet my frie…frie…friends.” Slik says in a drunken way “Meet Grix Thraves, Meka_Dragon and RastaBillySkank.” Slik says again like a drunk.
“Oh god, I’ve met these lot before.” RiCkOsS replies.
“Helllllllo ag..g..g..ain” Grix says to RiCkOsS. Meka answers with a huge drunken roar and RBS sqeezes something out that he shouldn’t have.
“Anyway, I’ve got to go now RiCkOsS, time for a little drink…” Slik says.
** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** **
After about 5 minutes slik stumbled out of view.
With tears in his eyes RiCkOsS started to mummer to himself. “It’s all lost…” RiCkOsS started “I won’t even get to seen screenshots of Mario Kart: GameCube, never mind play it. All I’ve got left to do is die…”
** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** **
Hope you enjoyed.
Thanks for reading
RiCkOsS
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