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Sony spokesperson Dave Ironbuns said to a bored and tired gaggle of journalists:
“Ok, the time has come to come clean. By which, I mean lie. You have heard of the evolution from the original Gaystation to the monolithic entity that is the PS2. Well, we lied.
There is no such thing as the emotion engine. We conned you and we totally got away with it. What you were told is the emotion engine is, in fact, the workings of the W.O.P.R.
You remember how Saddam Hussein got loads of PS2s to power a supercomputer?
Well that was true, but when he tried to launch global thermonuclear war, the W.O.P.R asked if he wouldn’t “prefer a nice game of chess”, before having a meltdown at playing tic-tac-toe.”
When questioned about this, Sony HQ produced their brains behind the PS2, Professor Falcon. He scared the journalists by buzz-bombing them with a radio-controlled Pterodactyl before shouting “Joshua” over and over.
An irate Steve Ballmer leaping about shouting, “I LOVE THIS COMPANY“ and ”OOK OOK” calmed down the scene.
Nintendo laughed like giddy children and Shigsy was seen to be waving like a girl at the news, until one lone voice reminded them of the “Made from Straw” fiasco. Upon hearing this, Shigsy painted his butt a nice fire engine red and shouted “No speakee English, go away. You very bad man”.
Journalists were confused and puzzled.
If learning of the PS2 true history, the crowds of nerdy journos were positively dulled by the announcement from Sony that it was, indeed, “Considering the PS3”. Loads of thick children danced about like pixies and proclaimed the death of the PS2, before they realised that this was called “evolution” and “a natural progression”.
Details remain sketchy about the PS3, but there have been some spoilers released.
These are currently known to be absolute falsehoods including:
It will be the size of a small country. Possibly Liechtenstein.
Launch titles include: Tekken 6, Ridge Racer 8 and Mukki Mukki Dancing (from Konami)
People have guessed at the appearance of the console, but Sony will only say “It bears resemblance to 80s tv icon Tommy Boyd”.
When questioned about this news, WWF star “The Rock” added little of interest.
That was definitely worth it.
> Does Mukki Mukki Dancing feature Patrick Swayze?
---
Yes.
You get a dance-mat, a nice vest and a mullet for that totally immersive "A***-faced actor" experience.
Which is planned for an October 2004 release by the way. With Grand Theft Auto 7: Not Many Cars Left.
> Does Mukki Mukki Dancing feature Patrick Swayze?
most probably!
slik ~_~
Sony spokesperson Dave Ironbuns said to a bored and tired gaggle of journalists:
“Ok, the time has come to come clean. By which, I mean lie. You have heard of the evolution from the original Gaystation to the monolithic entity that is the PS2. Well, we lied.
There is no such thing as the emotion engine. We conned you and we totally got away with it. What you were told is the emotion engine is, in fact, the workings of the W.O.P.R.
You remember how Saddam Hussein got loads of PS2s to power a supercomputer?
Well that was true, but when he tried to launch global thermonuclear war, the W.O.P.R asked if he wouldn’t “prefer a nice game of chess”, before having a meltdown at playing tic-tac-toe.”
When questioned about this, Sony HQ produced their brains behind the PS2, Professor Falcon. He scared the journalists by buzz-bombing them with a radio-controlled Pterodactyl before shouting “Joshua” over and over.
An irate Steve Ballmer leaping about shouting, “I LOVE THIS COMPANY“ and ”OOK OOK” calmed down the scene.
Nintendo laughed like giddy children and Shigsy was seen to be waving like a girl at the news, until one lone voice reminded them of the “Made from Straw” fiasco. Upon hearing this, Shigsy painted his butt a nice fire engine red and shouted “No speakee English, go away. You very bad man”.
Journalists were confused and puzzled.
If learning of the PS2 true history, the crowds of nerdy journos were positively dulled by the announcement from Sony that it was, indeed, “Considering the PS3”. Loads of thick children danced about like pixies and proclaimed the death of the PS2, before they realised that this was called “evolution” and “a natural progression”.
Details remain sketchy about the PS3, but there have been some spoilers released.
These are currently known to be absolute falsehoods including:
It will be the size of a small country. Possibly Liechtenstein.
Launch titles include: Tekken 6, Ridge Racer 8 and Mukki Mukki Dancing (from Konami)
People have guessed at the appearance of the console, but Sony will only say “It bears resemblance to 80s tv icon Tommy Boyd”.
When questioned about this news, WWF star “The Rock” added little of interest.