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"If GCSEs became a video game..."

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Sun 09/03/03 at 10:06
Regular
Posts: 787
I hate school. I'm waiting for the day that I can break free and bagger off to Uni. Until then, though, I'm grounded. And what's worse, is that school is starting to affect my life. Damn it.

Every single day in school I'm reminded of an acronym. This certain four letter word haunts me, it stalks me in my sleep, it lurks around every friggin' corner. That word? GCSE.

Damn the school system. Damn it. The one game I'm actually losing sleep over (slight exaggeration there) is released during the course of revision/ tests. Marvelous. I don't blame Nintendo, no, because everyone else will be playing Zelda on May 3rd, but as for me? A nice couple of hours studying osmosis, or perhaps the Schlieffen plan, or, god forbid, the sine rule.

So then, I must be crazy thinking that GCSEs can be made into a game. No, I'm not wasted (Wish I was, though ;D), I'm annoyed. On one side you have your life. You choose the rules, what you do, what you eat etc. I'm a gamer, therefore I like to play video games. So why the hell am I revising my butt off for some crappy tests? Because it's one of life's many annoyances. If I fail these certain tests, it's the end of the road. No 6th Form, no University, no Job. Magic. Wave goodbye to Gaming, then. And then on the other side I have video games. My favourite pastime will have to be put on 'pause' (Haha) for four or so months. I'll get withdrawal symptoms, I bet.


So then, why not bung them in a pot and mix them together until light and fluffy? What would be the end result?

All GCSE tests would be Video Game orientated. Not only does this mean that we already know so much about the topic that we wouldn't have to do any revision WHATSOEVER, it also means that we now have a reason to play video games. Not bad, then.

But then the other result is what prompted me to start writing this post in the first place. GCSE: The game.

What exactly would this entail then? Well, it's like this. You stick in your disc, let it spin around and then let the fun begin! Or not.

Because not only would this game shift no copies at all, it would be so hideously boring to code that the programmers would actually have a mental breakdown. Not nice at all, then. And another thing: Your actions and test scores will be saved onto memory cards and sent off to edXcel and AQA. The very thought scares me.

Training mode: This is, essentially, revision. Much like Animal Crossing, this would run in real time. The game expects you to be up by 9:00, absorbing information by 10:00, and turning the console off by 17:00. And not only that, using the upcoming GBA camera, the game will record your every move, and then it's beamed directly to school where teachers make sure you're actually doing revision. Why us, eh?

Career Mode: Career mode is, basically, like a Career office, in the sense that from the outcome of the special tests that you take here, your perfect future career will be generated. Great.

GCSE: This is the full-blown thing. This is where the Men are sorted from the boys (and the Women from the girls, too). The FMV sequence plays and you walk to your desk, 'casually' drop your pencil and look up the fit teacher's skirt, before finally reaching your destination. It may be wooden, and it may have metal legs, but boy oh boy, it's one of the most important desks in the world, even if it is wobbly! Because this, my friends, is where you either pass or fail.

You see, I'm constantly reminded of the saying, "It's just a game". No, I don't get aggressive when I lose, and I don't dress up and pretend I'm bulbasaur, it's just that if this game *were* to be made, it wouldn't be "just a game" because it would determine the rest of you life.

It's quite a big burden on your life, really. To be presented with tests that make or break your life is quite scary. Oh how I hate this stupid system.

Multiplayer: Well, essentially, there wouldn't be a multiplayer. Remember, "Communication of any sort is not permitted during the exam". Anyone found entering multiplayer automatically fails. Why do they tempt us, why oh why?

Coursework: For some stupid reason, the programmers decided to allow students to do coursework AFTER the main exams. Must be programmed by EA, then.

You know, I thought I had it bad, but GCSE: The game is much worse. Give me lack of Zelda and four months of revision anyday.

But for now, I guess I'll be OK, well, until Metroid Prime and Sonic Mega collection show up and I'm not allowed to play them. Damn education again.

Excuse me while I go kick the Education minister.


Thanks for reading, if, er, it bears any relevance to Games whatsoever

The even crazier Microchips
Sun 09/03/03 at 12:57
Regular
"Jog on, sunshine"
Posts: 8,979
BEARDS. wrote:
> I won. That's all that matters.


Now try moles, and I don't mean the rodents either...

:D
Sun 09/03/03 at 13:02
Regular
"Cardboard Tube Ninj"
Posts: 2,221
Well, moles are a thing encountered in anyone's life, and it's a useful example of how minor changes in a person's body chemistry can result in visable alterations (if that's crap, it's because I literally slept through about 9 Biology lessons during year 11, still got an A though.). If they didn't teach you about moles, you'd probably have to learn about something a lot more complex so that they could get the basic ideas across. And they have to teach you things like it because otherwise people who go into any biological field including medicine, biochemistry, veterinarian science etc would have to start learning from scratch at the start of their course.

People can't decide whether they like a subject and want to study it properly until they've learnt some of what it's about.
Sun 09/03/03 at 14:58
Regular
"Z will be here soon"
Posts: 7,562
Nice post matey :-P
Sun 09/03/03 at 15:44
Posts: 11,652
If thw whole of school was a video game, it would be good, no more getting told off, well in person any way...
Twould be good...
Sun 09/03/03 at 17:00
Regular
"Remember me?"
Posts: 6,124
Quality post there, Chipster, as usual. And as for failing exams and getting absolutely nowhere in life...

Welcome to MY world.
Sun 09/03/03 at 17:02
Regular
"Brrrrr."
Posts: 1,864
Nice post - If only it were true...
Sun 09/03/03 at 17:04
Regular
"Jog on, sunshine"
Posts: 8,979
Cheers for the replies!

:D
Sun 09/03/03 at 17:09
Regular
"Hellfire Stoker"
Posts: 10,534
I'm not doing my GCSEs 'til next year- but if I could change a few things with the education board, I'd have GCSE Championship Manager, Railroad Tycoon II and International cricket captain instead of IT on my form.

ho ho ho.
Sun 09/03/03 at 18:12
Regular
"Ghost Mutt"
Posts: 1,326
But standard deviation is so much fun. It has all those crazy symbols.
Sun 09/03/03 at 18:16
Regular
"Jog on, sunshine"
Posts: 8,979
Yes, like ‡” and the X with - above it.

YeY

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