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And all through the house, not a creature was stirring except for a goatboy.
I went shopping yesterday and it almost turned into a "State of Emergency" gaming situation.
Ok, I know it's my own fault for leaving it so late, but I'm different to everyone else.
I know what I wanted and what shop it was in.
What I didn't do was stand in the middle of the concourse with my enormo-buggy and scream at my dirty-faced children eating burgers.
And I didn't stand in HMV staring at rows of Cds shouting "What one did Jack want?" to my overweight partner standing 9 aisles down.
(why do HMV stores have the narrowest aisles in all of shopping history?)
No, I bought 4 DVDs and 2 CDs for people, then got in my car and left.
What is so hard about that?
Why does everyone go mental at Xmas and make like it's Spartacus or something?
Blokes shopping is totally different, we are like laser-guided missiles.
We go directly to the store, get it and leave.
We're the SAS of consumers.
But the women armed with prams and kids...those that are born to dawdle and get in my way.
Or my personal favourite, stopping dead when you're right behind them so you pile over them and end up sitting in their push-chair looking confused and angry.
Shopping is no place for a man to be.
Unless it's two men, and then you just wander about in computer stores and gadget ones. We don't amble around Boots picking things up and reading them, before putting them down and going right back to the 1st thing we saw.
And public loos.
Why, in the 21st century, do men still pee standing next to each other? It's not pleasant or civilised. The women get cubicles, so why do complete strangers have to stand 3 inches away from each other and stare fixedly at the wall, refusing to acknowledge anyone else in the room?
Why?
Because you'd get beaten up and left for dead if you started chatting to the bloke next to you.
As it should be.
Now I have killed 20 mins and I'm going to wrap stuff up.
One last point:
Why do girlies like dragons and stuff?
Every woman I know wants some pikey Middle Earth figures.
Ah well, at least this topic has a top title before anyone else nicked it.
Happy Xmas kids, hope you get exactly what you deserve from Santa.
I went shopping yesterday and it almost turned into a "State of Emergency" gaming situation.
Ok, I know it's my own fault for leaving it so late, but I'm different to everyone else.
I know what I wanted and what shop it was in.
What I didn't do was stand in the middle of the concourse with my enormo-buggy and scream at my dirty-faced children eating burgers.
And I didn't stand in HMV staring at rows of Cds shouting "What one did Jack want?" to my overweight partner standing 9 aisles down.
(why do HMV stores have the narrowest aisles in all of shopping history?)
No, I bought 4 DVDs and 2 CDs for people, then got in my car and left.
What is so hard about that?
Why does everyone go mental at Xmas and make like it's Spartacus or something?
Blokes shopping is totally different, we are like laser-guided missiles.
We go directly to the store, get it and leave.
We're the SAS of consumers.
But the women armed with prams and kids...those that are born to dawdle and get in my way.
Or my personal favourite, stopping dead when you're right behind them so you pile over them and end up sitting in their push-chair looking confused and angry.
Shopping is no place for a man to be.
Unless it's two men, and then you just wander about in computer stores and gadget ones. We don't amble around Boots picking things up and reading them, before putting them down and going right back to the 1st thing we saw.
And public loos.
Why, in the 21st century, do men still pee standing next to each other? It's not pleasant or civilised. The women get cubicles, so why do complete strangers have to stand 3 inches away from each other and stare fixedly at the wall, refusing to acknowledge anyone else in the room?
Why?
Because you'd get beaten up and left for dead if you started chatting to the bloke next to you.
As it should be.
Now I have killed 20 mins and I'm going to wrap stuff up.
One last point:
Why do girlies like dragons and stuff?
Every woman I know wants some pikey Middle Earth figures.
Ah well, at least this topic has a top title before anyone else nicked it.
Happy Xmas kids, hope you get exactly what you deserve from Santa.
Page:
Ive got all my stuff on Thursday it weren't that busy really considering it was late night shopping well happy holidays everyybody.
I did loads on Friday. Then I left the rest for today and did it all before 9. I was home just after 9 and now all I've got to do is wrap the basts! CDs and DVDs make xmas so easy, but still expensive.
And all through the house, not a creature was stirring except for a goatboy.
I went shopping yesterday and it almost turned into a "State of Emergency" gaming situation.
Ok, I know it's my own fault for leaving it so late, but I'm different to everyone else.
I know what I wanted and what shop it was in.
What I didn't do was stand in the middle of the concourse with my enormo-buggy and scream at my dirty-faced children eating burgers.
And I didn't stand in HMV staring at rows of Cds shouting "What one did Jack want?" to my overweight partner standing 9 aisles down.
(why do HMV stores have the narrowest aisles in all of shopping history?)
No, I bought 4 DVDs and 2 CDs for people, then got in my car and left.
What is so hard about that?
Why does everyone go mental at Xmas and make like it's Spartacus or something?
Blokes shopping is totally different, we are like laser-guided missiles.
We go directly to the store, get it and leave.
We're the SAS of consumers.
But the women armed with prams and kids...those that are born to dawdle and get in my way.
Or my personal favourite, stopping dead when you're right behind them so you pile over them and end up sitting in their push-chair looking confused and angry.
Shopping is no place for a man to be.
Unless it's two men, and then you just wander about in computer stores and gadget ones. We don't amble around Boots picking things up and reading them, before putting them down and going right back to the 1st thing we saw.
And public loos.
Why, in the 21st century, do men still pee standing next to each other? It's not pleasant or civilised. The women get cubicles, so why do complete strangers have to stand 3 inches away from each other and stare fixedly at the wall, refusing to acknowledge anyone else in the room?
Why?
Because you'd get beaten up and left for dead if you started chatting to the bloke next to you.
As it should be.
Now I have killed 20 mins and I'm going to wrap stuff up.
One last point:
Why do girlies like dragons and stuff?
Every woman I know wants some pikey Middle Earth figures.
Ah well, at least this topic has a top title before anyone else nicked it.
Happy Xmas kids, hope you get exactly what you deserve from Santa.
I went shopping yesterday and it almost turned into a "State of Emergency" gaming situation.
Ok, I know it's my own fault for leaving it so late, but I'm different to everyone else.
I know what I wanted and what shop it was in.
What I didn't do was stand in the middle of the concourse with my enormo-buggy and scream at my dirty-faced children eating burgers.
And I didn't stand in HMV staring at rows of Cds shouting "What one did Jack want?" to my overweight partner standing 9 aisles down.
(why do HMV stores have the narrowest aisles in all of shopping history?)
No, I bought 4 DVDs and 2 CDs for people, then got in my car and left.
What is so hard about that?
Why does everyone go mental at Xmas and make like it's Spartacus or something?
Blokes shopping is totally different, we are like laser-guided missiles.
We go directly to the store, get it and leave.
We're the SAS of consumers.
But the women armed with prams and kids...those that are born to dawdle and get in my way.
Or my personal favourite, stopping dead when you're right behind them so you pile over them and end up sitting in their push-chair looking confused and angry.
Shopping is no place for a man to be.
Unless it's two men, and then you just wander about in computer stores and gadget ones. We don't amble around Boots picking things up and reading them, before putting them down and going right back to the 1st thing we saw.
And public loos.
Why, in the 21st century, do men still pee standing next to each other? It's not pleasant or civilised. The women get cubicles, so why do complete strangers have to stand 3 inches away from each other and stare fixedly at the wall, refusing to acknowledge anyone else in the room?
Why?
Because you'd get beaten up and left for dead if you started chatting to the bloke next to you.
As it should be.
Now I have killed 20 mins and I'm going to wrap stuff up.
One last point:
Why do girlies like dragons and stuff?
Every woman I know wants some pikey Middle Earth figures.
Ah well, at least this topic has a top title before anyone else nicked it.
Happy Xmas kids, hope you get exactly what you deserve from Santa.
Page: