Viewing Thread:
"Staff Status - Whatever Next?"

After Darkus proclaiming himself a ‘Staff Ninja’, perhaps a new trend in staff status has been set and soon the conflict in staff status will be more brutal than the punishment dished out at a fetish dungeon – ouch!

Here are some of my ideas.

Tony – The grand daddy of SR himself could be the ‘Staff Overlord’, ruling over all of the other staffies like a certain moustached middle-eastern dictator. He would be a golden colour, not the gone off cheese colour of notables but actual gold, so pure it melts your computer monitor just to see it. Damn! Where his post count should be, there could be a list of how much money he has made from all of us, the rich git!

BEARDS – The king of sarcasm could take his role as the staff marmot. He could be, erm, marmot coloured and be petted by everyone by dragging the cursor over his name. Instead of his posts tally he would have a list of how many virtual marmot snacks users had given him. Doesn’t it make you just want to go ‘aww’? – No, me either.

Mr Snuggly – Snuggles could change his stance to staff Santa. Yes, he is the one who awards those lovely heart-warming little gifts we like to call GADs (or in a newbie’s
case ‘Mi freeh gayme’). Where his stats page would ordinarily be, he would have a list of ‘GADs given’ and ‘children made happy’. His name would be festive red with a hint of mine pie brown.

Larrykins – Due to being one of the few ladies on the forums, she could be the ‘Staff Flirt’. She could use her gender to tempt to desperate under-sexed forum members into buying more Special Reserve products and making Tony need to carry his money in a suitcase as opposed to a wallet. Larrykins could be hooker-pink and instead of her post count on her stats page there could be her phone number.

Schroeder – Schroeder could be the ‘Staff recovering crack addict’ who tells the forums of her binges and how she used to sleep with Tony to fund her 50 Snickers and day addiction. She can be an idol for forum pill heads and use her wise words of rehab to sell nicotine patches via SR. Her name can be cocaine white and instead of her word count can be her ‘pills popped today’ tally. (No offence is meant to Schroeder by this part of the post, it is just a, erm, theory…yes…a theory…)


Hope you enjoyed reading, if you didn't, meh!

Just can't get the staff these days...(Like the pun, eh eh? I'll get my coat)

I read this by the way, about 3 minutes after you posted it. Just couldn't think of anything interesting to say.

Salamander Reserve

Staff Lizard

:-D

Don't mess with my name again DW :'(

Yeah, there should be more titles and rankings and the like.
Only so as people can feel higher and mightier than the ones below them, and the little losers have something to aim towards.

DW that was...nice :-D

I am the walrus, ku-ku-kachoo.

www.geocities.com/gazzazcool/sr.html

I got bored damnit. But...doesn't that blue look so cool. SR should make a special status that is blue!

DW wrote:
> Schroeder's left SR.

Gah, I didn't know that - damn!

The beards one is soo true...
Sarcy, yet funny...