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In the words of Homer The Great "Hee he hee, it's funny cos' it's true"
1) Triangular sandwiches taste better than square ones.
2) At the end of every party there is always a girl crying.
3) One of the most awkward things that can happen in a pub is when your pint-to-
toilet cycle gets synchronised with a complete stranger.
4) You've never quite sure whether it's ok to eat green crisps.
5) Everyone who grew up in the 80's has entered the digits 55378008 into a
calculator.
6) Reading when you're drunk is horrible.
7) Sharpening a pencil with a knife makes you feel really manly.
8) You're never quite sure whether it's against the law or not to have a fire
in your back garden.
9) Nobody ever dares make cup-a-soup in a bowl.
10) You never know where to look when eating a banana.
11) Its impossible to describe the smell of a wet cat.
12) Prodding a fire with a stick makes you feel manly.
13) Rummaging in an overgrown garden will always turn up a bouncy ball.
14) You always feel a bit scared when stroking horses.
15) Everyone always remembers the day a dog ran into your school. <
16) The most embarrassing thing you can do as schoolchild is to call your
teacher mum or dad.
17) The smaller the monkey the more it looks like it would kill you at the
first given opportunity.
18) Some days you see lots of people on crutches.
19) Every bloke has at some stage while taking a pee flushed half way through
and then raced against the flush.
20) Old women with mobile phones look wrong!
21) Its impossible to look cool whilst picking up a Frisbee.
22) Driving through a tunnel makes you feel excited.
23) You never ever run out of salt.
24) Old ladies can eat more than you think. <
25) You can't respect a man who carries a dog.
26) There's no panic like the panic you momentarily feel when you've got your
hand or head stuck in something.
27) No one knows the origins of their metal coat hangers.
28) Despite constant warning, you have never met anybody who has had their arm
broken by a swan.
29) The most painful household incident is wearing socks and stepping on an
upturned plug.
30) People who don't drive slam car doors too hard
31)You've turned into your dad the day you put aside a thin piece of wood
specifically to stir paint with.
32) Everyone had an uncle who tried to steal their nose.
33) Bricks are horrible to carry.
34) In every plate of chips there is a bad chip.
1) Triangular sandwiches taste better than square ones.
2) At the end of every party there is always a girl crying.
3) One of the most awkward things that can happen in a pub is when your pint-to-
toilet cycle gets synchronised with a complete stranger.
4) You've never quite sure whether it's ok to eat green crisps.
5) Everyone who grew up in the 80's has entered the digits 55378008 into a
calculator.
6) Reading when you're drunk is horrible.
7) Sharpening a pencil with a knife makes you feel really manly.
8) You're never quite sure whether it's against the law or not to have a fire
in your back garden.
9) Nobody ever dares make cup-a-soup in a bowl.
10) You never know where to look when eating a banana.
11) Its impossible to describe the smell of a wet cat.
12) Prodding a fire with a stick makes you feel manly.
13) Rummaging in an overgrown garden will always turn up a bouncy ball.
14) You always feel a bit scared when stroking horses.
15) Everyone always remembers the day a dog ran into your school. <
16) The most embarrassing thing you can do as schoolchild is to call your
teacher mum or dad.
17) The smaller the monkey the more it looks like it would kill you at the
first given opportunity.
18) Some days you see lots of people on crutches.
19) Every bloke has at some stage while taking a pee flushed half way through
and then raced against the flush.
20) Old women with mobile phones look wrong!
21) Its impossible to look cool whilst picking up a Frisbee.
22) Driving through a tunnel makes you feel excited.
23) You never ever run out of salt.
24) Old ladies can eat more than you think. <
25) You can't respect a man who carries a dog.
26) There's no panic like the panic you momentarily feel when you've got your
hand or head stuck in something.
27) No one knows the origins of their metal coat hangers.
28) Despite constant warning, you have never met anybody who has had their arm
broken by a swan.
29) The most painful household incident is wearing socks and stepping on an
upturned plug.
30) People who don't drive slam car doors too hard
31)You've turned into your dad the day you put aside a thin piece of wood
specifically to stir paint with.
32) Everyone had an uncle who tried to steal their nose.
33) Bricks are horrible to carry.
34) In every plate of chips there is a bad chip.
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Heh, they are all so true.
El Blokey wrote:
> I thought it was from Peter Kay?
*****
Yep, well according to the e-mail title.
Oh and Mojojojojoj, shaddupya face
> I thought it was from Peter Kay?
*****
Yep, well according to the e-mail title.
Oh and Mojojojojoj, shaddupya face
El Blokey wrote:
> I thought it was from Peter Kay?
Get back you bastad, I'll break your legs?
> I thought it was from Peter Kay?
Get back you bastad, I'll break your legs?
35) Almost every girl/woman turns into a drama queen when there is a spider on the wall.
36) If you walk a mile or more you usually always see at least one piece of dog poo.
37) People love to fart in the bath.
38) Cats always run under cars.
39) Blokes aways brag about having sex but they are too embarrassed to buy condoms.
40) Gold fish never seem to get bored.
36) If you walk a mile or more you usually always see at least one piece of dog poo.
37) People love to fart in the bath.
38) Cats always run under cars.
39) Blokes aways brag about having sex but they are too embarrassed to buy condoms.
40) Gold fish never seem to get bored.
I thought it was from Peter Kay?
Oh the ironing.
MoJoJoJo wrote:
> These have been posted before, MONTHS ago.
oh the ironing.
> These have been posted before, MONTHS ago.
oh the ironing.
This has already been done.
This year.
This year.
> 26) There's no panic like the panic you momentarily feel when you've
> got your
> hand or head stuck in something.
That's easily the best one!
Sooooo true!
> got your
> hand or head stuck in something.
That's easily the best one!
Sooooo true!
They were great, Must have been ages ago Mojo because I never read 'em!
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