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"I was running with a box so I couldn't see what was under my feet then my feet got caught up in some wrapping and I tripped over and hurt myself. Clearly this was the companies fault for allowing me to run and not supplying see-through boxes and little gnomes to say 'Oy idiot stop running when you can't see what's under your feet'. I got £8000 for being an person who lacks any sort of commonsense"
"I was too stupid to realise a ladder with no support would slip down a wall if I tried to climb it, clearly this is the companies fault and I got 3 squillion dollars and am currently suing god for putting the ground there."
"I was too busy letching at the little kids on the pavement that I crashed into another car. Thankfully I quick-wittedly blamed it on the placing of the busstop and nobody thinks I'm a child molester. I got £10,000 which I've used to put a playground in my front garden"
"I'm not aware of vehicles in my workplace so I was very surprised to find myself crushed by a forklift. Clearly it's not my fault I wasn't careful when working near people operating machinery and blatantly wasn't cutting corners but not being careful where I placed myself. I was given the entire country of New Guinea and am currently waging a war against the Mysterons who have invaded my fridge."
"I have rubbish impractical shoes so when I walked across a wet floor and slipped and injured myself. I am currently suing the incontinent OAP who was walking infront of me at the time."
"I was too stupid to realise a ladder with no support would slip down a wall if I tried to climb it, clearly this is the companies fault and I got 3 squillion dollars and am currently suing god for putting the ground there."
"I was too busy letching at the little kids on the pavement that I crashed into another car. Thankfully I quick-wittedly blamed it on the placing of the busstop and nobody thinks I'm a child molester. I got £10,000 which I've used to put a playground in my front garden"
"I'm not aware of vehicles in my workplace so I was very surprised to find myself crushed by a forklift. Clearly it's not my fault I wasn't careful when working near people operating machinery and blatantly wasn't cutting corners but not being careful where I placed myself. I was given the entire country of New Guinea and am currently waging a war against the Mysterons who have invaded my fridge."
"I have rubbish impractical shoes so when I walked across a wet floor and slipped and injured myself. I am currently suing the incontinent OAP who was walking infront of me at the time."
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"I was running with a box so I couldn't see what was under my feet then my feet got caught up in some wrapping and I tripped over and hurt myself. Clearly this was the companies fault for allowing me to run and not supplying see-through boxes and little gnomes to say 'Oy idiot stop running when you can't see what's under your feet'. I got £8000 for being an person who lacks any sort of commonsense"
"I was too stupid to realise a ladder with no support would slip down a wall if I tried to climb it, clearly this is the companies fault and I got 3 squillion dollars and am currently suing god for putting the ground there."
"I was too busy letching at the little kids on the pavement that I crashed into another car. Thankfully I quick-wittedly blamed it on the placing of the busstop and nobody thinks I'm a child molester. I got £10,000 which I've used to put a playground in my front garden"
"I'm not aware of vehicles in my workplace so I was very surprised to find myself crushed by a forklift. Clearly it's not my fault I wasn't careful when working near people operating machinery and blatantly wasn't cutting corners but not being careful where I placed myself. I was given the entire country of New Guinea and am currently waging a war against the Mysterons who have invaded my fridge."
"I have rubbish impractical shoes so when I walked across a wet floor and slipped and injured myself. I am currently suing the incontinent OAP who was walking infront of me at the time."
"I was too stupid to realise a ladder with no support would slip down a wall if I tried to climb it, clearly this is the companies fault and I got 3 squillion dollars and am currently suing god for putting the ground there."
"I was too busy letching at the little kids on the pavement that I crashed into another car. Thankfully I quick-wittedly blamed it on the placing of the busstop and nobody thinks I'm a child molester. I got £10,000 which I've used to put a playground in my front garden"
"I'm not aware of vehicles in my workplace so I was very surprised to find myself crushed by a forklift. Clearly it's not my fault I wasn't careful when working near people operating machinery and blatantly wasn't cutting corners but not being careful where I placed myself. I was given the entire country of New Guinea and am currently waging a war against the Mysterons who have invaded my fridge."
"I have rubbish impractical shoes so when I walked across a wet floor and slipped and injured myself. I am currently suing the incontinent OAP who was walking infront of me at the time."
Oh and I haven't quoted this from anywhere. The adverts inspired me to parody them.
Sometimes the claims are just.
Hah! The bus stop one ...
It's what I always think whenever I see that advert..
1.) No-one drives past a bus stop and leans forward to stare at the children when they're obviously not at primary school and it isn't really a hazard
2.) The way he talks about the stop with loving and the look on his face PROVE he's up to.. 'mischief'.
More to the point though, he sees the car in front of him at least thirty seconds before he slams into it, it's ridiculous.
And the way at the end of the advert he's at pains to say the bus stops moved to the other side of the road, but, no worries.. he still tries a sideways glance!
It's what I always think whenever I see that advert..
1.) No-one drives past a bus stop and leans forward to stare at the children when they're obviously not at primary school and it isn't really a hazard
2.) The way he talks about the stop with loving and the look on his face PROVE he's up to.. 'mischief'.
More to the point though, he sees the car in front of him at least thirty seconds before he slams into it, it's ridiculous.
And the way at the end of the advert he's at pains to say the bus stops moved to the other side of the road, but, no worries.. he still tries a sideways glance!
I was waiting to cross the road. It wasn't clear, but I stepped forward anyway, spraining my ankle whilst doing so because I didn't realise the kerb was higher than the road. I was awarded ... err ... I'm sorry, I can't read the rest of my script. The accident injured my eyes. IS it available in braille? No? Well then I'm sueing you too for not correctly giving me a warning sign about it.
I used to hate those adverts before but i especially loathe them now when they try and act like they're doing it for a greater cause.
"and what's more they've resighted that bus stop*
*now they've introduced safety measures at work*
Oh please like you actually give a crap about that, you're just after your quick 5 grand or whatever ludicrous sum you got for your own incompetence.
"and what's more they've resighted that bus stop*
*now they've introduced safety measures at work*
Oh please like you actually give a crap about that, you're just after your quick 5 grand or whatever ludicrous sum you got for your own incompetence.
Compensation culture at it's best. Made me laugh the way you've written it.
If I have an accident at work I blame it on my own stupid self (if I am to blame, which 99.9% I am). The only thing I would sue is if a customer attacked me and that wouldn't be the company. I'd go the whole hog against the irate customer :D
If I have an accident at work I blame it on my own stupid self (if I am to blame, which 99.9% I am). The only thing I would sue is if a customer attacked me and that wouldn't be the company. I'd go the whole hog against the irate customer :D
Absolute genius, and so very true. Reminds me of the adverts in GTA III, "You can so almost anyone for anything, and you'll probably win... or at least get a cash settlement!", or however they went.
Those adverts are a real pain, probably second only to Carol Vorderman dishing out special offers on losing your house!
Those adverts are a real pain, probably second only to Carol Vorderman dishing out special offers on losing your house!
Der Nazi wrote:
> Those adverts are a real pain, probably second only to Carol
> Vorderman dishing out special offers on losing your house!
You've never seen those Rivita ads with Fern Britain in them then?
> Those adverts are a real pain, probably second only to Carol
> Vorderman dishing out special offers on losing your house!
You've never seen those Rivita ads with Fern Britain in them then?
That toilet paper advert with the little asian kid is gaytarded.
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