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"The Idiots Guide to Robbing Special Reserve..."

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Sun 26/08/01 at 22:08
Regular
Posts: 787
Meet Shaun. He is your average computer lover. He likes games, TV and all that you would expect from him. He is 13 years old and so can't get a proper job. He has tried all of the get rich quick schemes he could muster out of the search engines. He had nothing to offer for money. He then thought of stealing. Robbing banks would have been too high profile so he though to rob a shop. The first name to spring into his mind was Special Reserve, partly because he had just been browsing the Special Reserve Chat Forums. All this for a Squier Strat Fender Electric Guitar?

He was hell bent on getting some money. He brainstormed the ways, of which this operation could be carried out and eventually, he decided. He grabbed a large piece of paper and formulated his plan. After several man-hours of work, the plan was drawn. He went out to buy all of the accessories and equipment required for this plan to be pulled off, a small fortune compared to the money he was about to make. When he got everything he needed. He loaded everything into his Skoda and took a 10-minute drive to the Chelmsford branch of Special Reserve.

He got out of his car and opened his boot; all of his equipment was there. He got it all ready, when a policeman came along.

“What are you doing out here at 2 o’ clock in the morning?”, asked the policeman.

“Well…I’m…Uh”, stuttered Shaun as he reaches for something.

He grabs a can of black spraypaint and sprays the policeman with it. He then throws the policeman in the boot and locks the boot. Shaun gets out his rope with a hook on the end and throws it onto the roof. It hooks onto the roof and Shaun climbs the rope the then climbs onto the roof from the gutter. He gets out a mini-chainsaw, conveniently prepared for the situation. He cuts a hole in the roof, with minimal noise and goes to lower himself down but quickly places a cigarette into his mouth. Suddenly, many burglar alarms become visible. He evades the lines of vision and sneaks over to the power box. He turns the alarms off and heads for the cash register. He opens the cash register and to his surprise, there is no money in it. He hears a cigarette lighter turn on and he turns around to the origin of the noise.

“Who the hell are you?!”, says Shaun.

“Your worst nightmare”, exclaims Tony.

“But what are you doing here?”

“I basically live here.”

“You’re going to call the police aren’t you?”

“Yes I am.”

“Wait right there.”

Tony goes to the office to call the police when he heard the click of a gun and he slowly turns around to see Shaun brandishing a Glock 47 in his face.

“Don’t move, or I redecorate with brains and paint colour red.”

“Ok, don’t do anything drastic.”

“Drastic? I killed a kid because he mocked me!”

“This isn’t good. You’re going to kill me aren’t you?”

“Yes, I am”

“Great…”

Shaun aims the Glock 47 to Tony’s head.

“Wait, let me know, who are you?”

“I’m Shaneo from Special Reserve Chat Forums.”

“You’re Shaneo, I’m Tony. I always thought you were a bit weird.”

“You’re pushing me!”

Shaun is about to pull the trigger, when police sirens are heard.

“Give me the money now Tony!”

The police barge their way in as Shaun is trying to escape through a ventilation duct. The police shoot and they hit his leg. Shaun still continues to crawl and gets onto the roof. When he gets onto the roof, he is about to escape when he sees loads of police cars with gunmen behind them. Shaun stands there and puts his hands in the air as the police come up to arrest him. He is whisked away in a police car and is interrogated. He is jailed for 5 years, 3 for robbery and 2 for brandishing a weapon.

This story happened 5 years ago, Shaun was freed today.
Thu 30/08/01 at 21:00
Regular
"You've upset me"
Posts: 21,152
Hey ~Biggles, aint seen you for a while.
Thu 30/08/01 at 20:54
"I love yo... lamp."
Posts: 19,577
But 5 years ago would it not have been UK Discussions? If it existed that is.
Thu 30/08/01 at 19:25
Regular
"( . ) ( . )"
Posts: 3,279
Gulp.
Wed 29/08/01 at 19:29
Regular
"what is knowledge ?"
Posts: 2,112
cool story shaneo !! some guy near where i live is called shaun and he nicks stuff from shops , i saw him in the paper a while back.
Wed 29/08/01 at 19:02
Regular
"Jags is teh l33t"
Posts: 4,074
Its a good story but about half of it doesn't make sense.
Wed 29/08/01 at 18:53
Regular
"( . ) ( . )"
Posts: 3,279
Turbonutter wrote:
> Well doen, you've won, now can you stop copying stuff now? Good.

LoL.
Wed 29/08/01 at 03:06
Posts: 0
hey i just read that and it was pretty good.
Wed 29/08/01 at 02:43
Regular
"I am your father"
Posts: 537
Tony wrote:

Hey Tony nice to see you online, espically at 1:30 in the morning. Working late? Anyways I posted that poem you said I could do, but I doubt you've read it yet as your a busy man. *cough* not *cough*
Wed 29/08/01 at 01:45
Posts: 0
Hey tony!

Just thought id say hi, im new, well a few days now!

Do u pick the winners? If u do cheers for choosing my review!
Wed 29/08/01 at 01:30
Staff Moderator
"Must lose weight"
Posts: 5,778
The_Vottanator wrote:
> You know, if by any remote chance that any of these ideas are actually used by someone and they work then Tony really won't be too pleased with you.

:)


It's OK Notarottavator.

Now that I've read this I'll be more careful. In fact I've just had a web cam fitted to tbe back of my head.

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