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'The six of spades? What’s so significant about the six of spades?' Bonus asked
'Well, it holds the key to the future of the monkey wor....'
'What is is Goatboy?
'One of the damn monkeys has escaped!'
***Goatboy went on a chase through the jungle***
Goatboy was looking at the monkey with an inquisitive glare, he didn't know what it wanted nor what it was doing, it was bending its head to the side while laughing with an evil cackle.
Then without a word of warning the monkeys head seemed to implode and splatter all over the face of Goatboy, he spat out the disgusting froth and laughed and said to himself,
'Ha stupid monkey, I warned him at birth not to laugh or the implanted bomb would go off'.
Goatboy made his way back to the camp, it was not a far walk but the large bushes and towering trees gave it a sense of eternity.
'Where have you been Goatboy?'Bonus asked
'I was seeing to a runaway monkey that escaped from my cage!'
'I really don't know why you keep those stupid monkeys! How many do you have now?'
'Twelve.. and I love everyone of them........'
****************
'Soooo Grix, what are we going to do tonight?'er-no asked
'The same thing we do every night er-no, try to take over the world!!!!'
Grix wasn't being sarcastic, for the last seven hundred and eighty nine days they had tried to take over the world, the Playstation and Nintendo war had been thought for well over two years now and Grix had wanted to give the Nintendo side the extra push that would guarantee them safety and also give him control of the world.
'Sir, Agent Game reporting for duty, what is my new mission?'
'Did you kill Lara Croft?'er-no asked
'Yes, I used her assets to a great strangle advantage.....'
'hehehehe, just like I asked.'Grix interrupted, 'you are my favourite agent Game, never have you let me down'
'What about me?'er-no asked
'You are my er.... favourite sidekick'Grix explained
'I am your only sid...'
'Exactly...'Grix grinningly said.
'Excuse me Grix, what are we going to do now, are last plan of stealing all the sugar from Ant's camp was exhausted when Cheatguru sold them the plans for a peanut.'Game asked
'Whatever happened to him, he was my favourite agent.'Grix said
'He was killed when he chocked on the peanut...and I thought I was your favourite agent..'
'You are my favourite ....er..'new'agent'
The three Nintendroids sat there and planned their new plan that could win them the war of the consoles and put an end to the suffering of eternally unoriginal games.
***********
'What are we doing. What are we doing. WWWHHHAAATTT AAARRREEE WWWEEEE
DDDOOOIINNNGGG PEOPLE!!'Ant shouted at his millions (hundreds) of followers
'We are carrying out your instructions of operation 'sugar', where we move all the sugar into your tent area'jd99 replied
'Well then....um.. carry on.. carry on. remember though after this we have a large war to fight with another one of Grix's plans tonight... yawn, they could more boring every night'Ant shouted
'Yes sir, YES SIR'jd99 recalled back.
*******
'I have it, I have the plan for tonight'Grix announced'
'What is it?' er-no asked
'For this plan we will need to help of our old friend in the jungle!'
'Grix, I thought you said you never wanted to speak to Goatboy again after he released all the monkeys to attack you'
'Well, I have changed my mind, I would like to talk to Goatboy about him helping with tonight's plan, Agent Game, can you please arrange a reverse charge phone call for me to talk to Goatboy'
Game went off to get in contact with Goatboy, after several failed reserve charge attempts Grix excepted the phone charge and talked to Goatboy...
'The person you are calling is busy on an 09066 number, meanwhile, he has selected a music composition to be put on while you wait' The automatic message said,
**music begins**
''Oh, I'm the king of the Monkeys oh, the Monkey VIP, I climb to the top don't know when to stop, and that is what is bothering me.....''
'I know he does this on purpose' Grix shouted
** two minutes later music finally stops**
'Finally!' Grix again shouted
'Hello, this is the one, the only, the Goatboy speaking'
'Oh, hello, its Grix here Goaty, I need your help with a final battle!'
'What do you want this time Grix? My monkeys?... ha ha'
'Well....um Yes please'
'Well you can't have them.... ( a long pause) actually, for a deal you can!'
'What kind of deal do you have in mind?'
‘Meka Dragon and RBS must lead the monkeys into battle, I would only want to lose them if they were in the hands of these two warriors...’
‘Ok then, we have a deal, make sure your twelve monkeys are two hundred metres away from Ant’s camp later today’
‘I will be there, and you can have the monkeys only if Meka and RBS are there’
The phone is hung up and both ends of the line, Goatboy asks Bonus to help him pack for the twenty minute walk through the jungle onto the huge field were the Sony army are gathered, while Bonus packs for Goatboy, Goatboy is feeding his super intelligent monkeys carrot juice and cream.
*******
The Sony army, lead by Ant were waiting for a sign of Grix, he always gave a sign to give Ant a chance in the nightly battle. jd99 and turbonutter waited for Ant’s signal, all the sugar had been moved and the followers of Sony were just waiting for the battle.
‘Is everybody ready?’ Ant asked
‘Yes Sir!’ turbonutter replied
‘Good Good, tonight will be the final battle....’
*******
Agent Game had called apon Hacker TW for help in tracking the two requested warriors...
‘What is so special about these guys?’ TW asked
‘I have no idea, they went missing after the one hundredth and ninth war. Anyway you are the one that is looking them up!’ Game replied
‘er...hang on, I have found there stats that the great warrior Tony left before he got killed in the battle after they went missing, hang on I will bring them up...’
Meka Dragon profile by Tony:
Trained for battle everyday, is known to still be alive. Having fought with him for over one hundred wars I can say that I have never seen a warrior to actually dodge attacks from swords, guns, knifes and cannons. I can truly say that with this guy on your team, you will not lose....
Location: I know that meka will still be training at home for when he is asked to return to fight for Nintendo, he only wants to fight one more battle, so only pick him if you are sure it will be over by the morning!
RBS profile by Tony:
Well, this bright warrior never seemed to get hurt, his speed was his asset, facing warriors from in front and then killing from behind while they were left attacking his shadow, I would sum this warrior up with three sentences. ‘You see him. You don’t. Your Dead’
Location: RBS will be found running the streets of London, all he ever used to do was run and I reckon Soho would be the best bet for finding him....
***screen turns off, Tony’s message is ended****
‘These guys sound amazing, why would they want to lead monkeys into war?’ TW asked
‘Your guess is as good as mine...’
er-no enters the room...
‘How are you guys getting along?’
‘Quite well, we have found them and know of there locations’
‘Excellent now find them and get them here...
(Meka Dragon and RBS enter the room.)
....what the hell, how did you know we wanted needed you?’ er-no asked
‘Our Master Ali told us to come here on this night two hundred days ago, we will only fight this last battle and avenge his death!’
Grix entered and after some talk explained that now is the time for them to fight there last. TW and er-no were left at the base, hacking into useful files, they were told and warned by a cover note in Tony’s diary that it would be foolish to ever try and find the files of the Agent Dan2k1... he warned of a shutdown and slower machine.......... RBS, Meka, Grix and Agent Game went to the field of war...
*****
‘Who is that on the horizon?’ Ant asked
‘It is a boy, a man and about ten monkeys in a cage’ turbonutter responded
‘Well if they move over the hill, kill them.’
‘ Yes Sir’
Grix lead RBS, Meka and Agent Game onto the field, they saw Goatboy in the distance and instead of going to him, Agent Game called Goatboy over with some backwards language...
‘WON, ereh revo teg ,yobtaoG yeH’
Goatboy moved with Bonus and the monkeys over towards Grix, when they got there Meka was amazed at who he saw...
‘Tony? Your Honour? Dringo? SHEEPY? Sniper?...’
‘Yes, the monkeys are so special to me because they are in fact dead Nintendo warriors who soles live on in monkeys’ Goatboy explained
‘Who was the one who escaped earlier and died?’ Bonus asked
‘ahhh, that was Cheatguru, he seemed to have a brain the size of a peanut..’
‘Goatboy, do they understand what we say?’ asked while running around the group making macine gun noises with his mouth
‘Every word, but they can not laugh!’
‘Why not?’
‘Because when I signed the paper with the devil to keep the warriors soles I agreed that for them to be monkeys they would have a bug attached to them which when they laugh their heads explode from the inside.’
‘If there soles have been kept within the monkeys then have their fighting methods been preserved?’ meka asked
‘Yes indeed, they have kept everything they know, and I wanted only you and RBS to fight along side them when the time came, as you are the only two living warriors!’
‘Finally. Master Ali must have known this and wanted us to return on this night to fight alongside the warriors that began and killed so very many Sony followers...’
‘GUYS..and monkeys, here is the plan......’
While Grix explained the plan, Ant was busy thinking what Grix had in store for him tonight!
‘jd99, tubonutter, gronti_v....etc’ Ant called out the names of his remainer followers that had survived the wars.
Ant was ready, he had had enough of the war, he wanted it to end but he didn’t want Grix to win, anyone else was better....anyone else.
******
‘Goatboy, I can name a few of the monkeys but not all of them, please tell me who the twelve are..’ meka asked
‘Ahhhh, yes they are...’ Goatboy names while Bonus pointed, ‘Sniper, Sheepy, Dringo, Your Honour, Tony, Dan uk, Dan2k1, FantasyMeister....
‘woooaahhh, hang on a minute, FantasyMeister is not a Nintendroid and Dan2k1 killed himself when the Sega war ended!’ Grix interupted,
‘Well, I took the twelve greatest warriors that had died in the war, unluckily the fought for different sides’ Goatboy explained,
‘How can we let these fight in the war then?’ RBS asked while continuously running around the group.
‘They will fight, but for which side I do not know, however if you want you can kill the nontendo ones now!’ Bonus said
‘Kill them, they should already be dead’ Grix announced
‘Hang on, these are my pets, they are mine and you can’t just kill them!’ Goatboy said.
Game whispered to Grix something, then while Bonus was letting the monkeys out of the cage the monkeys seemed to seperate into three groups, meka could tell which ones were who, the way they looked at him and either smiled or grinned could tell him that the first group was the one on his side. Grix saw RBS run over to the Nintendo group and walked over to the second group.
‘What are you doing with Dan2k1, Grix?’ meka asked
‘While Goatboy is in deep conversation with Bonus and Game I am going to make the monkeys laugh that won’t fight for us!’
‘You are a cruel cruel man Grix Thraves’
‘Yes, but this is the final night!’
Grix started to crack jokes to the monkeys in the second group, meka was instructed to not let the first group listen, and the monkeys that Grix was talking to started to giggle and make squeaky noises...
...one of the monkeys made a break for it and managed to get away from RBS on a turn, all the monkeys began to laugh when RBS fell over and one by one their heads began to explode...
....heads exploded and flew around the surrounding fields Goatboy turned to see Dan uk and Your Honour begin to laugh and within seconds their heads exploded....
‘nnnooooooo’ Goatboy shouted, ‘my monkeys are going’
‘ssshhhhiiiiiii......’
‘...don’t finish that Grix, there are still three Nintendo monkeys left, I covered their eyes when RBS fell over, I knew your jokes were crap and just wouldn’t make anyone laugh!’
‘Who do we have left?’ Grix asked
‘We have the fighting three of Sniper, SHEEPY and Tony’ said meka
‘Are these three enough for our plan?’ Grix asked
‘They are enough Grix, they are enough....’
‘Well then what are we waiting for... let the war begin!’ RBS shouted
*************
Ant saw figures emerging over the hilltops, Grix had given no warning, but Ant was ready enough, what is going to be the outcome of this amazing battle? Well my friends, this is where you come into it.
What will the outcome be?
A) Grix Wins the war easily
B) Ant wins the war easily
C) Secret Ending 1
D) Secret Ending 2
The decision is yours....one vote each!
'Well, it holds the key to the future of the monkey wor....'
'What is is Goatboy?
'One of the damn monkeys has escaped!'
***Goatboy went on a chase through the jungle***
Goatboy was looking at the monkey with an inquisitive glare, he didn't know what it wanted nor what it was doing, it was bending its head to the side while laughing with an evil cackle.
Then without a word of warning the monkeys head seemed to implode and splatter all over the face of Goatboy, he spat out the disgusting froth and laughed and said to himself,
'Ha stupid monkey, I warned him at birth not to laugh or the implanted bomb would go off'.
Goatboy made his way back to the camp, it was not a far walk but the large bushes and towering trees gave it a sense of eternity.
'Where have you been Goatboy?'Bonus asked
'I was seeing to a runaway monkey that escaped from my cage!'
'I really don't know why you keep those stupid monkeys! How many do you have now?'
'Twelve.. and I love everyone of them........'
****************
'Soooo Grix, what are we going to do tonight?'er-no asked
'The same thing we do every night er-no, try to take over the world!!!!'
Grix wasn't being sarcastic, for the last seven hundred and eighty nine days they had tried to take over the world, the Playstation and Nintendo war had been thought for well over two years now and Grix had wanted to give the Nintendo side the extra push that would guarantee them safety and also give him control of the world.
'Sir, Agent Game reporting for duty, what is my new mission?'
'Did you kill Lara Croft?'er-no asked
'Yes, I used her assets to a great strangle advantage.....'
'hehehehe, just like I asked.'Grix interrupted, 'you are my favourite agent Game, never have you let me down'
'What about me?'er-no asked
'You are my er.... favourite sidekick'Grix explained
'I am your only sid...'
'Exactly...'Grix grinningly said.
'Excuse me Grix, what are we going to do now, are last plan of stealing all the sugar from Ant's camp was exhausted when Cheatguru sold them the plans for a peanut.'Game asked
'Whatever happened to him, he was my favourite agent.'Grix said
'He was killed when he chocked on the peanut...and I thought I was your favourite agent..'
'You are my favourite ....er..'new'agent'
The three Nintendroids sat there and planned their new plan that could win them the war of the consoles and put an end to the suffering of eternally unoriginal games.
***********
'What are we doing. What are we doing. WWWHHHAAATTT AAARRREEE WWWEEEE
DDDOOOIINNNGGG PEOPLE!!'Ant shouted at his millions (hundreds) of followers
'We are carrying out your instructions of operation 'sugar', where we move all the sugar into your tent area'jd99 replied
'Well then....um.. carry on.. carry on. remember though after this we have a large war to fight with another one of Grix's plans tonight... yawn, they could more boring every night'Ant shouted
'Yes sir, YES SIR'jd99 recalled back.
*******
'I have it, I have the plan for tonight'Grix announced'
'What is it?' er-no asked
'For this plan we will need to help of our old friend in the jungle!'
'Grix, I thought you said you never wanted to speak to Goatboy again after he released all the monkeys to attack you'
'Well, I have changed my mind, I would like to talk to Goatboy about him helping with tonight's plan, Agent Game, can you please arrange a reverse charge phone call for me to talk to Goatboy'
Game went off to get in contact with Goatboy, after several failed reserve charge attempts Grix excepted the phone charge and talked to Goatboy...
'The person you are calling is busy on an 09066 number, meanwhile, he has selected a music composition to be put on while you wait' The automatic message said,
**music begins**
''Oh, I'm the king of the Monkeys oh, the Monkey VIP, I climb to the top don't know when to stop, and that is what is bothering me.....''
'I know he does this on purpose' Grix shouted
** two minutes later music finally stops**
'Finally!' Grix again shouted
'Hello, this is the one, the only, the Goatboy speaking'
'Oh, hello, its Grix here Goaty, I need your help with a final battle!'
'What do you want this time Grix? My monkeys?... ha ha'
'Well....um Yes please'
'Well you can't have them.... ( a long pause) actually, for a deal you can!'
'What kind of deal do you have in mind?'
‘Meka Dragon and RBS must lead the monkeys into battle, I would only want to lose them if they were in the hands of these two warriors...’
‘Ok then, we have a deal, make sure your twelve monkeys are two hundred metres away from Ant’s camp later today’
‘I will be there, and you can have the monkeys only if Meka and RBS are there’
The phone is hung up and both ends of the line, Goatboy asks Bonus to help him pack for the twenty minute walk through the jungle onto the huge field were the Sony army are gathered, while Bonus packs for Goatboy, Goatboy is feeding his super intelligent monkeys carrot juice and cream.
*******
The Sony army, lead by Ant were waiting for a sign of Grix, he always gave a sign to give Ant a chance in the nightly battle. jd99 and turbonutter waited for Ant’s signal, all the sugar had been moved and the followers of Sony were just waiting for the battle.
‘Is everybody ready?’ Ant asked
‘Yes Sir!’ turbonutter replied
‘Good Good, tonight will be the final battle....’
*******
Agent Game had called apon Hacker TW for help in tracking the two requested warriors...
‘What is so special about these guys?’ TW asked
‘I have no idea, they went missing after the one hundredth and ninth war. Anyway you are the one that is looking them up!’ Game replied
‘er...hang on, I have found there stats that the great warrior Tony left before he got killed in the battle after they went missing, hang on I will bring them up...’
Meka Dragon profile by Tony:
Trained for battle everyday, is known to still be alive. Having fought with him for over one hundred wars I can say that I have never seen a warrior to actually dodge attacks from swords, guns, knifes and cannons. I can truly say that with this guy on your team, you will not lose....
Location: I know that meka will still be training at home for when he is asked to return to fight for Nintendo, he only wants to fight one more battle, so only pick him if you are sure it will be over by the morning!
RBS profile by Tony:
Well, this bright warrior never seemed to get hurt, his speed was his asset, facing warriors from in front and then killing from behind while they were left attacking his shadow, I would sum this warrior up with three sentences. ‘You see him. You don’t. Your Dead’
Location: RBS will be found running the streets of London, all he ever used to do was run and I reckon Soho would be the best bet for finding him....
***screen turns off, Tony’s message is ended****
‘These guys sound amazing, why would they want to lead monkeys into war?’ TW asked
‘Your guess is as good as mine...’
er-no enters the room...
‘How are you guys getting along?’
‘Quite well, we have found them and know of there locations’
‘Excellent now find them and get them here...
(Meka Dragon and RBS enter the room.)
....what the hell, how did you know we wanted needed you?’ er-no asked
‘Our Master Ali told us to come here on this night two hundred days ago, we will only fight this last battle and avenge his death!’
Grix entered and after some talk explained that now is the time for them to fight there last. TW and er-no were left at the base, hacking into useful files, they were told and warned by a cover note in Tony’s diary that it would be foolish to ever try and find the files of the Agent Dan2k1... he warned of a shutdown and slower machine.......... RBS, Meka, Grix and Agent Game went to the field of war...
*****
‘Who is that on the horizon?’ Ant asked
‘It is a boy, a man and about ten monkeys in a cage’ turbonutter responded
‘Well if they move over the hill, kill them.’
‘ Yes Sir’
Grix lead RBS, Meka and Agent Game onto the field, they saw Goatboy in the distance and instead of going to him, Agent Game called Goatboy over with some backwards language...
‘WON, ereh revo teg ,yobtaoG yeH’
Goatboy moved with Bonus and the monkeys over towards Grix, when they got there Meka was amazed at who he saw...
‘Tony? Your Honour? Dringo? SHEEPY? Sniper?...’
‘Yes, the monkeys are so special to me because they are in fact dead Nintendo warriors who soles live on in monkeys’ Goatboy explained
‘Who was the one who escaped earlier and died?’ Bonus asked
‘ahhh, that was Cheatguru, he seemed to have a brain the size of a peanut..’
‘Goatboy, do they understand what we say?’ asked while running around the group making macine gun noises with his mouth
‘Every word, but they can not laugh!’
‘Why not?’
‘Because when I signed the paper with the devil to keep the warriors soles I agreed that for them to be monkeys they would have a bug attached to them which when they laugh their heads explode from the inside.’
‘If there soles have been kept within the monkeys then have their fighting methods been preserved?’ meka asked
‘Yes indeed, they have kept everything they know, and I wanted only you and RBS to fight along side them when the time came, as you are the only two living warriors!’
‘Finally. Master Ali must have known this and wanted us to return on this night to fight alongside the warriors that began and killed so very many Sony followers...’
‘GUYS..and monkeys, here is the plan......’
While Grix explained the plan, Ant was busy thinking what Grix had in store for him tonight!
‘jd99, tubonutter, gronti_v....etc’ Ant called out the names of his remainer followers that had survived the wars.
Ant was ready, he had had enough of the war, he wanted it to end but he didn’t want Grix to win, anyone else was better....anyone else.
******
‘Goatboy, I can name a few of the monkeys but not all of them, please tell me who the twelve are..’ meka asked
‘Ahhhh, yes they are...’ Goatboy names while Bonus pointed, ‘Sniper, Sheepy, Dringo, Your Honour, Tony, Dan uk, Dan2k1, FantasyMeister....
‘woooaahhh, hang on a minute, FantasyMeister is not a Nintendroid and Dan2k1 killed himself when the Sega war ended!’ Grix interupted,
‘Well, I took the twelve greatest warriors that had died in the war, unluckily the fought for different sides’ Goatboy explained,
‘How can we let these fight in the war then?’ RBS asked while continuously running around the group.
‘They will fight, but for which side I do not know, however if you want you can kill the nontendo ones now!’ Bonus said
‘Kill them, they should already be dead’ Grix announced
‘Hang on, these are my pets, they are mine and you can’t just kill them!’ Goatboy said.
Game whispered to Grix something, then while Bonus was letting the monkeys out of the cage the monkeys seemed to seperate into three groups, meka could tell which ones were who, the way they looked at him and either smiled or grinned could tell him that the first group was the one on his side. Grix saw RBS run over to the Nintendo group and walked over to the second group.
‘What are you doing with Dan2k1, Grix?’ meka asked
‘While Goatboy is in deep conversation with Bonus and Game I am going to make the monkeys laugh that won’t fight for us!’
‘You are a cruel cruel man Grix Thraves’
‘Yes, but this is the final night!’
Grix started to crack jokes to the monkeys in the second group, meka was instructed to not let the first group listen, and the monkeys that Grix was talking to started to giggle and make squeaky noises...
...one of the monkeys made a break for it and managed to get away from RBS on a turn, all the monkeys began to laugh when RBS fell over and one by one their heads began to explode...
....heads exploded and flew around the surrounding fields Goatboy turned to see Dan uk and Your Honour begin to laugh and within seconds their heads exploded....
‘nnnooooooo’ Goatboy shouted, ‘my monkeys are going’
‘ssshhhhiiiiiii......’
‘...don’t finish that Grix, there are still three Nintendo monkeys left, I covered their eyes when RBS fell over, I knew your jokes were crap and just wouldn’t make anyone laugh!’
‘Who do we have left?’ Grix asked
‘We have the fighting three of Sniper, SHEEPY and Tony’ said meka
‘Are these three enough for our plan?’ Grix asked
‘They are enough Grix, they are enough....’
‘Well then what are we waiting for... let the war begin!’ RBS shouted
*************
Ant saw figures emerging over the hilltops, Grix had given no warning, but Ant was ready enough, what is going to be the outcome of this amazing battle? Well my friends, this is where you come into it.
What will the outcome be?
A) Grix Wins the war easily
B) Ant wins the war easily
C) Secret Ending 1
D) Secret Ending 2
The decision is yours....one vote each!
Page:
Dan2K1 wrote:
> Grix should be in Glasgow
Oh... ok... and also, I am going to bed now, basically because I have to be somewhere at 8:00 in the morning....
**er-no goes to find the sleeping drugs....**
> Grix should be in Glasgow
Oh... ok... and also, I am going to bed now, basically because I have to be somewhere at 8:00 in the morning....
**er-no goes to find the sleeping drugs....**
it*
I always put that without noticing!! Damn Lexdycsia
I always put that without noticing!! Damn Lexdycsia
Yeap, it looked even more confusing! Grix read the story and said is was 'quite good actually'......
Dan, that was the most confusing post I have ever read under your name, either go to bed or fetch the hammer!!!!
:D A B C or D???
:D A B C or D???
"Playstation and Nintendo war had been thought for well"
Fought*
Err, well, great... I have to say I don't really see any relevence in this story, and the fact that you make me an agent, who is a monkey taht already killed itself, coupled with the woeful special effects, directing and acting, the storyline should be the only thing that saves this. However, throughout the story I was looking for that line, couldn't find it and fell asleep.
er no replies "You've overstepped the mark there Dan"
Dan exclaims "Ah, so the line's behind me?"
>er-no explodes<
Tony comes rushing to see and awards an extra, extra gameaday prize as the remains of er-no formed another superb banner advertising the highly anticipated Master Systemezeeeeummmm and we're back in 1988.
Fought*
Err, well, great... I have to say I don't really see any relevence in this story, and the fact that you make me an agent, who is a monkey taht already killed itself, coupled with the woeful special effects, directing and acting, the storyline should be the only thing that saves this. However, throughout the story I was looking for that line, couldn't find it and fell asleep.
er no replies "You've overstepped the mark there Dan"
Dan exclaims "Ah, so the line's behind me?"
>er-no explodes<
Tony comes rushing to see and awards an extra, extra gameaday prize as the remains of er-no formed another superb banner advertising the highly anticipated Master Systemezeeeeummmm and we're back in 1988.
'The six of spades? What’s so significant about the six of spades?' Bonus asked
'Well, it holds the key to the future of the monkey wor....'
'What is is Goatboy?
'One of the damn monkeys has escaped!'
***Goatboy went on a chase through the jungle***
Goatboy was looking at the monkey with an inquisitive glare, he didn't know what it wanted nor what it was doing, it was bending its head to the side while laughing with an evil cackle.
Then without a word of warning the monkeys head seemed to implode and splatter all over the face of Goatboy, he spat out the disgusting froth and laughed and said to himself,
'Ha stupid monkey, I warned him at birth not to laugh or the implanted bomb would go off'.
Goatboy made his way back to the camp, it was not a far walk but the large bushes and towering trees gave it a sense of eternity.
'Where have you been Goatboy?'Bonus asked
'I was seeing to a runaway monkey that escaped from my cage!'
'I really don't know why you keep those stupid monkeys! How many do you have now?'
'Twelve.. and I love everyone of them........'
****************
'Soooo Grix, what are we going to do tonight?'er-no asked
'The same thing we do every night er-no, try to take over the world!!!!'
Grix wasn't being sarcastic, for the last seven hundred and eighty nine days they had tried to take over the world, the Playstation and Nintendo war had been thought for well over two years now and Grix had wanted to give the Nintendo side the extra push that would guarantee them safety and also give him control of the world.
'Sir, Agent Game reporting for duty, what is my new mission?'
'Did you kill Lara Croft?'er-no asked
'Yes, I used her assets to a great strangle advantage.....'
'hehehehe, just like I asked.'Grix interrupted, 'you are my favourite agent Game, never have you let me down'
'What about me?'er-no asked
'You are my er.... favourite sidekick'Grix explained
'I am your only sid...'
'Exactly...'Grix grinningly said.
'Excuse me Grix, what are we going to do now, are last plan of stealing all the sugar from Ant's camp was exhausted when Cheatguru sold them the plans for a peanut.'Game asked
'Whatever happened to him, he was my favourite agent.'Grix said
'He was killed when he chocked on the peanut...and I thought I was your favourite agent..'
'You are my favourite ....er..'new'agent'
The three Nintendroids sat there and planned their new plan that could win them the war of the consoles and put an end to the suffering of eternally unoriginal games.
***********
'What are we doing. What are we doing. WWWHHHAAATTT AAARRREEE WWWEEEE
DDDOOOIINNNGGG PEOPLE!!'Ant shouted at his millions (hundreds) of followers
'We are carrying out your instructions of operation 'sugar', where we move all the sugar into your tent area'jd99 replied
'Well then....um.. carry on.. carry on. remember though after this we have a large war to fight with another one of Grix's plans tonight... yawn, they could more boring every night'Ant shouted
'Yes sir, YES SIR'jd99 recalled back.
*******
'I have it, I have the plan for tonight'Grix announced'
'What is it?' er-no asked
'For this plan we will need to help of our old friend in the jungle!'
'Grix, I thought you said you never wanted to speak to Goatboy again after he released all the monkeys to attack you'
'Well, I have changed my mind, I would like to talk to Goatboy about him helping with tonight's plan, Agent Game, can you please arrange a reverse charge phone call for me to talk to Goatboy'
Game went off to get in contact with Goatboy, after several failed reserve charge attempts Grix excepted the phone charge and talked to Goatboy...
'The person you are calling is busy on an 09066 number, meanwhile, he has selected a music composition to be put on while you wait' The automatic message said,
**music begins**
''Oh, I'm the king of the Monkeys oh, the Monkey VIP, I climb to the top don't know when to stop, and that is what is bothering me.....''
'I know he does this on purpose' Grix shouted
** two minutes later music finally stops**
'Finally!' Grix again shouted
'Hello, this is the one, the only, the Goatboy speaking'
'Oh, hello, its Grix here Goaty, I need your help with a final battle!'
'What do you want this time Grix? My monkeys?... ha ha'
'Well....um Yes please'
'Well you can't have them.... ( a long pause) actually, for a deal you can!'
'What kind of deal do you have in mind?'
‘Meka Dragon and RBS must lead the monkeys into battle, I would only want to lose them if they were in the hands of these two warriors...’
‘Ok then, we have a deal, make sure your twelve monkeys are two hundred metres away from Ant’s camp later today’
‘I will be there, and you can have the monkeys only if Meka and RBS are there’
The phone is hung up and both ends of the line, Goatboy asks Bonus to help him pack for the twenty minute walk through the jungle onto the huge field were the Sony army are gathered, while Bonus packs for Goatboy, Goatboy is feeding his super intelligent monkeys carrot juice and cream.
*******
The Sony army, lead by Ant were waiting for a sign of Grix, he always gave a sign to give Ant a chance in the nightly battle. jd99 and turbonutter waited for Ant’s signal, all the sugar had been moved and the followers of Sony were just waiting for the battle.
‘Is everybody ready?’ Ant asked
‘Yes Sir!’ turbonutter replied
‘Good Good, tonight will be the final battle....’
*******
Agent Game had called apon Hacker TW for help in tracking the two requested warriors...
‘What is so special about these guys?’ TW asked
‘I have no idea, they went missing after the one hundredth and ninth war. Anyway you are the one that is looking them up!’ Game replied
‘er...hang on, I have found there stats that the great warrior Tony left before he got killed in the battle after they went missing, hang on I will bring them up...’
Meka Dragon profile by Tony:
Trained for battle everyday, is known to still be alive. Having fought with him for over one hundred wars I can say that I have never seen a warrior to actually dodge attacks from swords, guns, knifes and cannons. I can truly say that with this guy on your team, you will not lose....
Location: I know that meka will still be training at home for when he is asked to return to fight for Nintendo, he only wants to fight one more battle, so only pick him if you are sure it will be over by the morning!
RBS profile by Tony:
Well, this bright warrior never seemed to get hurt, his speed was his asset, facing warriors from in front and then killing from behind while they were left attacking his shadow, I would sum this warrior up with three sentences. ‘You see him. You don’t. Your Dead’
Location: RBS will be found running the streets of London, all he ever used to do was run and I reckon Soho would be the best bet for finding him....
***screen turns off, Tony’s message is ended****
‘These guys sound amazing, why would they want to lead monkeys into war?’ TW asked
‘Your guess is as good as mine...’
er-no enters the room...
‘How are you guys getting along?’
‘Quite well, we have found them and know of there locations’
‘Excellent now find them and get them here...
(Meka Dragon and RBS enter the room.)
....what the hell, how did you know we wanted needed you?’ er-no asked
‘Our Master Ali told us to come here on this night two hundred days ago, we will only fight this last battle and avenge his death!’
Grix entered and after some talk explained that now is the time for them to fight there last. TW and er-no were left at the base, hacking into useful files, they were told and warned by a cover note in Tony’s diary that it would be foolish to ever try and find the files of the Agent Dan2k1... he warned of a shutdown and slower machine.......... RBS, Meka, Grix and Agent Game went to the field of war...
*****
‘Who is that on the horizon?’ Ant asked
‘It is a boy, a man and about ten monkeys in a cage’ turbonutter responded
‘Well if they move over the hill, kill them.’
‘ Yes Sir’
Grix lead RBS, Meka and Agent Game onto the field, they saw Goatboy in the distance and instead of going to him, Agent Game called Goatboy over with some backwards language...
‘WON, ereh revo teg ,yobtaoG yeH’
Goatboy moved with Bonus and the monkeys over towards Grix, when they got there Meka was amazed at who he saw...
‘Tony? Your Honour? Dringo? SHEEPY? Sniper?...’
‘Yes, the monkeys are so special to me because they are in fact dead Nintendo warriors who soles live on in monkeys’ Goatboy explained
‘Who was the one who escaped earlier and died?’ Bonus asked
‘ahhh, that was Cheatguru, he seemed to have a brain the size of a peanut..’
‘Goatboy, do they understand what we say?’ asked while running around the group making macine gun noises with his mouth
‘Every word, but they can not laugh!’
‘Why not?’
‘Because when I signed the paper with the devil to keep the warriors soles I agreed that for them to be monkeys they would have a bug attached to them which when they laugh their heads explode from the inside.’
‘If there soles have been kept within the monkeys then have their fighting methods been preserved?’ meka asked
‘Yes indeed, they have kept everything they know, and I wanted only you and RBS to fight along side them when the time came, as you are the only two living warriors!’
‘Finally. Master Ali must have known this and wanted us to return on this night to fight alongside the warriors that began and killed so very many Sony followers...’
‘GUYS..and monkeys, here is the plan......’
While Grix explained the plan, Ant was busy thinking what Grix had in store for him tonight!
‘jd99, tubonutter, gronti_v....etc’ Ant called out the names of his remainer followers that had survived the wars.
Ant was ready, he had had enough of the war, he wanted it to end but he didn’t want Grix to win, anyone else was better....anyone else.
******
‘Goatboy, I can name a few of the monkeys but not all of them, please tell me who the twelve are..’ meka asked
‘Ahhhh, yes they are...’ Goatboy names while Bonus pointed, ‘Sniper, Sheepy, Dringo, Your Honour, Tony, Dan uk, Dan2k1, FantasyMeister....
‘woooaahhh, hang on a minute, FantasyMeister is not a Nintendroid and Dan2k1 killed himself when the Sega war ended!’ Grix interupted,
‘Well, I took the twelve greatest warriors that had died in the war, unluckily the fought for different sides’ Goatboy explained,
‘How can we let these fight in the war then?’ RBS asked while continuously running around the group.
‘They will fight, but for which side I do not know, however if you want you can kill the nontendo ones now!’ Bonus said
‘Kill them, they should already be dead’ Grix announced
‘Hang on, these are my pets, they are mine and you can’t just kill them!’ Goatboy said.
Game whispered to Grix something, then while Bonus was letting the monkeys out of the cage the monkeys seemed to seperate into three groups, meka could tell which ones were who, the way they looked at him and either smiled or grinned could tell him that the first group was the one on his side. Grix saw RBS run over to the Nintendo group and walked over to the second group.
‘What are you doing with Dan2k1, Grix?’ meka asked
‘While Goatboy is in deep conversation with Bonus and Game I am going to make the monkeys laugh that won’t fight for us!’
‘You are a cruel cruel man Grix Thraves’
‘Yes, but this is the final night!’
Grix started to crack jokes to the monkeys in the second group, meka was instructed to not let the first group listen, and the monkeys that Grix was talking to started to giggle and make squeaky noises...
...one of the monkeys made a break for it and managed to get away from RBS on a turn, all the monkeys began to laugh when RBS fell over and one by one their heads began to explode...
....heads exploded and flew around the surrounding fields Goatboy turned to see Dan uk and Your Honour begin to laugh and within seconds their heads exploded....
‘nnnooooooo’ Goatboy shouted, ‘my monkeys are going’
‘ssshhhhiiiiiii......’
‘...don’t finish that Grix, there are still three Nintendo monkeys left, I covered their eyes when RBS fell over, I knew your jokes were crap and just wouldn’t make anyone laugh!’
‘Who do we have left?’ Grix asked
‘We have the fighting three of Sniper, SHEEPY and Tony’ said meka
‘Are these three enough for our plan?’ Grix asked
‘They are enough Grix, they are enough....’
‘Well then what are we waiting for... let the war begin!’ RBS shouted
*************
Ant saw figures emerging over the hilltops, Grix had given no warning, but Ant was ready enough, what is going to be the outcome of this amazing battle? Well my friends, this is where you come into it.
What will the outcome be?
A) Grix Wins the war easily
B) Ant wins the war easily
C) Secret Ending 1
D) Secret Ending 2
The decision is yours....one vote each!
'Well, it holds the key to the future of the monkey wor....'
'What is is Goatboy?
'One of the damn monkeys has escaped!'
***Goatboy went on a chase through the jungle***
Goatboy was looking at the monkey with an inquisitive glare, he didn't know what it wanted nor what it was doing, it was bending its head to the side while laughing with an evil cackle.
Then without a word of warning the monkeys head seemed to implode and splatter all over the face of Goatboy, he spat out the disgusting froth and laughed and said to himself,
'Ha stupid monkey, I warned him at birth not to laugh or the implanted bomb would go off'.
Goatboy made his way back to the camp, it was not a far walk but the large bushes and towering trees gave it a sense of eternity.
'Where have you been Goatboy?'Bonus asked
'I was seeing to a runaway monkey that escaped from my cage!'
'I really don't know why you keep those stupid monkeys! How many do you have now?'
'Twelve.. and I love everyone of them........'
****************
'Soooo Grix, what are we going to do tonight?'er-no asked
'The same thing we do every night er-no, try to take over the world!!!!'
Grix wasn't being sarcastic, for the last seven hundred and eighty nine days they had tried to take over the world, the Playstation and Nintendo war had been thought for well over two years now and Grix had wanted to give the Nintendo side the extra push that would guarantee them safety and also give him control of the world.
'Sir, Agent Game reporting for duty, what is my new mission?'
'Did you kill Lara Croft?'er-no asked
'Yes, I used her assets to a great strangle advantage.....'
'hehehehe, just like I asked.'Grix interrupted, 'you are my favourite agent Game, never have you let me down'
'What about me?'er-no asked
'You are my er.... favourite sidekick'Grix explained
'I am your only sid...'
'Exactly...'Grix grinningly said.
'Excuse me Grix, what are we going to do now, are last plan of stealing all the sugar from Ant's camp was exhausted when Cheatguru sold them the plans for a peanut.'Game asked
'Whatever happened to him, he was my favourite agent.'Grix said
'He was killed when he chocked on the peanut...and I thought I was your favourite agent..'
'You are my favourite ....er..'new'agent'
The three Nintendroids sat there and planned their new plan that could win them the war of the consoles and put an end to the suffering of eternally unoriginal games.
***********
'What are we doing. What are we doing. WWWHHHAAATTT AAARRREEE WWWEEEE
DDDOOOIINNNGGG PEOPLE!!'Ant shouted at his millions (hundreds) of followers
'We are carrying out your instructions of operation 'sugar', where we move all the sugar into your tent area'jd99 replied
'Well then....um.. carry on.. carry on. remember though after this we have a large war to fight with another one of Grix's plans tonight... yawn, they could more boring every night'Ant shouted
'Yes sir, YES SIR'jd99 recalled back.
*******
'I have it, I have the plan for tonight'Grix announced'
'What is it?' er-no asked
'For this plan we will need to help of our old friend in the jungle!'
'Grix, I thought you said you never wanted to speak to Goatboy again after he released all the monkeys to attack you'
'Well, I have changed my mind, I would like to talk to Goatboy about him helping with tonight's plan, Agent Game, can you please arrange a reverse charge phone call for me to talk to Goatboy'
Game went off to get in contact with Goatboy, after several failed reserve charge attempts Grix excepted the phone charge and talked to Goatboy...
'The person you are calling is busy on an 09066 number, meanwhile, he has selected a music composition to be put on while you wait' The automatic message said,
**music begins**
''Oh, I'm the king of the Monkeys oh, the Monkey VIP, I climb to the top don't know when to stop, and that is what is bothering me.....''
'I know he does this on purpose' Grix shouted
** two minutes later music finally stops**
'Finally!' Grix again shouted
'Hello, this is the one, the only, the Goatboy speaking'
'Oh, hello, its Grix here Goaty, I need your help with a final battle!'
'What do you want this time Grix? My monkeys?... ha ha'
'Well....um Yes please'
'Well you can't have them.... ( a long pause) actually, for a deal you can!'
'What kind of deal do you have in mind?'
‘Meka Dragon and RBS must lead the monkeys into battle, I would only want to lose them if they were in the hands of these two warriors...’
‘Ok then, we have a deal, make sure your twelve monkeys are two hundred metres away from Ant’s camp later today’
‘I will be there, and you can have the monkeys only if Meka and RBS are there’
The phone is hung up and both ends of the line, Goatboy asks Bonus to help him pack for the twenty minute walk through the jungle onto the huge field were the Sony army are gathered, while Bonus packs for Goatboy, Goatboy is feeding his super intelligent monkeys carrot juice and cream.
*******
The Sony army, lead by Ant were waiting for a sign of Grix, he always gave a sign to give Ant a chance in the nightly battle. jd99 and turbonutter waited for Ant’s signal, all the sugar had been moved and the followers of Sony were just waiting for the battle.
‘Is everybody ready?’ Ant asked
‘Yes Sir!’ turbonutter replied
‘Good Good, tonight will be the final battle....’
*******
Agent Game had called apon Hacker TW for help in tracking the two requested warriors...
‘What is so special about these guys?’ TW asked
‘I have no idea, they went missing after the one hundredth and ninth war. Anyway you are the one that is looking them up!’ Game replied
‘er...hang on, I have found there stats that the great warrior Tony left before he got killed in the battle after they went missing, hang on I will bring them up...’
Meka Dragon profile by Tony:
Trained for battle everyday, is known to still be alive. Having fought with him for over one hundred wars I can say that I have never seen a warrior to actually dodge attacks from swords, guns, knifes and cannons. I can truly say that with this guy on your team, you will not lose....
Location: I know that meka will still be training at home for when he is asked to return to fight for Nintendo, he only wants to fight one more battle, so only pick him if you are sure it will be over by the morning!
RBS profile by Tony:
Well, this bright warrior never seemed to get hurt, his speed was his asset, facing warriors from in front and then killing from behind while they were left attacking his shadow, I would sum this warrior up with three sentences. ‘You see him. You don’t. Your Dead’
Location: RBS will be found running the streets of London, all he ever used to do was run and I reckon Soho would be the best bet for finding him....
***screen turns off, Tony’s message is ended****
‘These guys sound amazing, why would they want to lead monkeys into war?’ TW asked
‘Your guess is as good as mine...’
er-no enters the room...
‘How are you guys getting along?’
‘Quite well, we have found them and know of there locations’
‘Excellent now find them and get them here...
(Meka Dragon and RBS enter the room.)
....what the hell, how did you know we wanted needed you?’ er-no asked
‘Our Master Ali told us to come here on this night two hundred days ago, we will only fight this last battle and avenge his death!’
Grix entered and after some talk explained that now is the time for them to fight there last. TW and er-no were left at the base, hacking into useful files, they were told and warned by a cover note in Tony’s diary that it would be foolish to ever try and find the files of the Agent Dan2k1... he warned of a shutdown and slower machine.......... RBS, Meka, Grix and Agent Game went to the field of war...
*****
‘Who is that on the horizon?’ Ant asked
‘It is a boy, a man and about ten monkeys in a cage’ turbonutter responded
‘Well if they move over the hill, kill them.’
‘ Yes Sir’
Grix lead RBS, Meka and Agent Game onto the field, they saw Goatboy in the distance and instead of going to him, Agent Game called Goatboy over with some backwards language...
‘WON, ereh revo teg ,yobtaoG yeH’
Goatboy moved with Bonus and the monkeys over towards Grix, when they got there Meka was amazed at who he saw...
‘Tony? Your Honour? Dringo? SHEEPY? Sniper?...’
‘Yes, the monkeys are so special to me because they are in fact dead Nintendo warriors who soles live on in monkeys’ Goatboy explained
‘Who was the one who escaped earlier and died?’ Bonus asked
‘ahhh, that was Cheatguru, he seemed to have a brain the size of a peanut..’
‘Goatboy, do they understand what we say?’ asked while running around the group making macine gun noises with his mouth
‘Every word, but they can not laugh!’
‘Why not?’
‘Because when I signed the paper with the devil to keep the warriors soles I agreed that for them to be monkeys they would have a bug attached to them which when they laugh their heads explode from the inside.’
‘If there soles have been kept within the monkeys then have their fighting methods been preserved?’ meka asked
‘Yes indeed, they have kept everything they know, and I wanted only you and RBS to fight along side them when the time came, as you are the only two living warriors!’
‘Finally. Master Ali must have known this and wanted us to return on this night to fight alongside the warriors that began and killed so very many Sony followers...’
‘GUYS..and monkeys, here is the plan......’
While Grix explained the plan, Ant was busy thinking what Grix had in store for him tonight!
‘jd99, tubonutter, gronti_v....etc’ Ant called out the names of his remainer followers that had survived the wars.
Ant was ready, he had had enough of the war, he wanted it to end but he didn’t want Grix to win, anyone else was better....anyone else.
******
‘Goatboy, I can name a few of the monkeys but not all of them, please tell me who the twelve are..’ meka asked
‘Ahhhh, yes they are...’ Goatboy names while Bonus pointed, ‘Sniper, Sheepy, Dringo, Your Honour, Tony, Dan uk, Dan2k1, FantasyMeister....
‘woooaahhh, hang on a minute, FantasyMeister is not a Nintendroid and Dan2k1 killed himself when the Sega war ended!’ Grix interupted,
‘Well, I took the twelve greatest warriors that had died in the war, unluckily the fought for different sides’ Goatboy explained,
‘How can we let these fight in the war then?’ RBS asked while continuously running around the group.
‘They will fight, but for which side I do not know, however if you want you can kill the nontendo ones now!’ Bonus said
‘Kill them, they should already be dead’ Grix announced
‘Hang on, these are my pets, they are mine and you can’t just kill them!’ Goatboy said.
Game whispered to Grix something, then while Bonus was letting the monkeys out of the cage the monkeys seemed to seperate into three groups, meka could tell which ones were who, the way they looked at him and either smiled or grinned could tell him that the first group was the one on his side. Grix saw RBS run over to the Nintendo group and walked over to the second group.
‘What are you doing with Dan2k1, Grix?’ meka asked
‘While Goatboy is in deep conversation with Bonus and Game I am going to make the monkeys laugh that won’t fight for us!’
‘You are a cruel cruel man Grix Thraves’
‘Yes, but this is the final night!’
Grix started to crack jokes to the monkeys in the second group, meka was instructed to not let the first group listen, and the monkeys that Grix was talking to started to giggle and make squeaky noises...
...one of the monkeys made a break for it and managed to get away from RBS on a turn, all the monkeys began to laugh when RBS fell over and one by one their heads began to explode...
....heads exploded and flew around the surrounding fields Goatboy turned to see Dan uk and Your Honour begin to laugh and within seconds their heads exploded....
‘nnnooooooo’ Goatboy shouted, ‘my monkeys are going’
‘ssshhhhiiiiiii......’
‘...don’t finish that Grix, there are still three Nintendo monkeys left, I covered their eyes when RBS fell over, I knew your jokes were crap and just wouldn’t make anyone laugh!’
‘Who do we have left?’ Grix asked
‘We have the fighting three of Sniper, SHEEPY and Tony’ said meka
‘Are these three enough for our plan?’ Grix asked
‘They are enough Grix, they are enough....’
‘Well then what are we waiting for... let the war begin!’ RBS shouted
*************
Ant saw figures emerging over the hilltops, Grix had given no warning, but Ant was ready enough, what is going to be the outcome of this amazing battle? Well my friends, this is where you come into it.
What will the outcome be?
A) Grix Wins the war easily
B) Ant wins the war easily
C) Secret Ending 1
D) Secret Ending 2
The decision is yours....one vote each!
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