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"...The neighbour waits a few days before contacting the Post Office, who tell him where they delivered your new TV. Your neighbour stabs you for being a thief. Fin."
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"...you open it and it contains the lethal strain of bird flu, much like the rest of Eastern Europe, and soon everywhere else."
"...you open it, and it's a potent disease. Not only do you die, your neighbour comes round, sees what you did, and makes sure that 'thief' is written on your gravestone. That'll teach you to open packages."
"...you live in a one-man space station: you've just crossed into the Twilight Zone"
"...your neighbour was the postman noooooes!"
"...your neighbour was an IRA informant. Congratulations: you are dead"
"...The neighbour waits a few days before contacting the Post Office, who tell him where they delivered your new TV. Your neighbour stabs you for being a thief. Fin."
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