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"SSC28 - That Girl I Once Met"

And here we go. Although I realise it's improper to start any form of communication with 'and', even in an internal monologue such as this, I decided to press ahead. Live is short, and all that. I'll use as many ands as I want. Maybe I'll even start with a because sometime. That's how daring I am.

So, yep. I was walking to work one day, across the park. It's a nice park, by the way. Got grass and everything. Even a big old lake over that way somewhere, but I think someone drowned in it a coupla months ago, so it's sort of lost it's charm, y'know? You don't want to be idling along by the lakeside and see some corpse floating along.

Sorry, lost my train of thought. I was walking to work across the park. Incidentally, I love my job. It's great. Really. You hear all these stories about people working their 9 to 5's in a city and coming home depressed after spending the last hour watching the clock tick down, minute by minute. Not me, I absolutely love what I do. It's special. You want to know what I do? Tough.

Well, maybe later. It's not the issue right now. I was on my walk across the park, like I do everyday. Except the weekends, of course. Heh, unless, that is, I'm working at the weekend. I do sometimes. Or I feel like a walk. I do that too sometimes.

So, this walk. I was strolling slowly when I heard my name called. This didn't surprise me as such, because I've got a lot of friends. Honest. Most people have. The friend in this particular situation, I shall dub Chris. Nothing special about that name, but nothing wrong with it either. Ask most people and they know a Chris, and he's normally a nice guy. Exactly like this Chris. We roomed together at university, back in the day.

I say back in the day. What I actually mean is a year and a half ago. It just sounds better to say 'back in the day', don't you think? Implies a long-lasting bond and some form of special meaning to the friendship. The key here was Chris, though. Let's not stray from the point. Chris was almost certainly also on his way to work, because we live together and work quite near each other. The reason we weren't walking in together was that he spent last night at his girlfriends. He does that sometimes. It'd be nice to be envious here, because I'm not getting any, but I find it hard to be envious of Chris. Anyway, he has a girlfriend. Which at this point, is one of the best things ever to happen to me, because he is walking with a girl who is absolutely stunning and quite clearly not his girlfriend. Seriously, guys, this girl is gorgeous. And she looks like she probably has a good personality. I have no reason for assuming this, obviously, but she definitely does. Probably reads books. I do too, actually. Books are great. Love 'em.

You alright, says Chris, a casual greeting. I nod back while trying not to stare at his companion. I fail, because she's a very pretty young lady. She noticed, by the way. So did Chris. I reckon the kids playing footie a couple of hundred yards away noticed too.

Chris tells me that he's late for work and has to hurry. This is a blatant lie, because he starts at the same time as me and I'm not late. Also I know he really didn't care if he was late. Not that he didn't like his job, he's just got one of those attitudes. Like nothing bothers him.

So, Chris is late and has to hurry. Which is a lie. Which must mean he's about to ask me to keep his friend company. Which he does. Hell yes, I think. You even have to ask? He's trying to set me up with this girl. I'd be offended, but, well, I really need to be set up.

I then pretend I'm in a hurry, and even go to the trouble of looking at my watch. Then I reluctantly agree. She's my girlfriend's cousin, he says. Staying a coupla days in the big city. I make some stupid comment about this, something about tourists that I cant even remember now. It's a painfully unfunny comment. But she laughs. Probably a pity laugh. At this point I was sure this was going to be the most uncomfortable walk of my life. Chris probably knew this too, which is why he jogged off. He'd keep it up until he was out of sight and then duck behind a tree for a smoke. I hate Chris.

So I started on the small talk. Casual stuff, friends, family, where from, what you do, that sort of thing. We chatted for a bit as we strolled along. It's a -really- big park, you know? Huge. We've got a long way to go. And the sun is out. No-one likes to walk too fast in the sun.

And as we're chatting, I realise it's not actually any effort at all. Really, it's not. Have you ever met a girl and just clicked? Nah, me neither. But I've heard about it. This wasn't the 'just clicked' thing, because that's a myth. You don't see a girl, she sees you, and you both say, Hey! You're the one for me! Sex and marriage? Awesome, let's do it. It doesn't work like that, obviously.

But we were getting along. I liked that. She was smiling at me, and I was trying to keep my eyes on the path ahead but they kept on flicking across to look at her. All on their own, I swear. I don't control them.

Favourite bands? Check. Films? Awesome, she hates that new one too. Gigs she's been too. Hey, we were both at that U2 gig last month. That's great. Ever seen High Fidelity, when Cusack says "Call me shallow, these things matter?" Never before have I been convinced of this so much. This girl is great.

We get to the end of the path. By this point I had courage to do it. I was going to ask her out. And I did. Just like that. I was kinda proud of myself.

What to know what happened? I don't really care, I'm going to tell you anyway. We had a great date, and now we're living together, and engaged.

Not really.

Turns out she was married. You'd think I'd look at the hand, right? I never saw her again. Turns out Chris was actually late. So was I, for that matter. Never mind, eh? Worse things can happen. Look at the guy who drowned in the lake.

I like the style you chose to tell the story in. Funnily enough it was the kind of tlae that would be told on a walk across the park. Or it was in my mind. Good stuff.

That was great. I was laughing all the way through. The constant side tracking was amusing, but it still managed to keep on the subject. Well done.

And here we go. Although I realise it's improper to start any form of communication with 'and', even in an internal monologue such as this, I decided to press ahead. Live is short, and all that. I'll use as many ands as I want. Maybe I'll even start with a because sometime. That's how daring I am.

So, yep. I was walking to work one day, across the park. It's a nice park, by the way. Got grass and everything. Even a big old lake over that way somewhere, but I think someone drowned in it a coupla months ago, so it's sort of lost it's charm, y'know? You don't want to be idling along by the lakeside and see some corpse floating along.

Sorry, lost my train of thought. I was walking to work across the park. Incidentally, I love my job. It's great. Really. You hear all these stories about people working their 9 to 5's in a city and coming home depressed after spending the last hour watching the clock tick down, minute by minute. Not me, I absolutely love what I do. It's special. You want to know what I do? Tough.

Well, maybe later. It's not the issue right now. I was on my walk across the park, like I do everyday. Except the weekends, of course. Heh, unless, that is, I'm working at the weekend. I do sometimes. Or I feel like a walk. I do that too sometimes.

So, this walk. I was strolling slowly when I heard my name called. This didn't surprise me as such, because I've got a lot of friends. Honest. Most people have. The friend in this particular situation, I shall dub Chris. Nothing special about that name, but nothing wrong with it either. Ask most people and they know a Chris, and he's normally a nice guy. Exactly like this Chris. We roomed together at university, back in the day.

I say back in the day. What I actually mean is a year and a half ago. It just sounds better to say 'back in the day', don't you think? Implies a long-lasting bond and some form of special meaning to the friendship. The key here was Chris, though. Let's not stray from the point. Chris was almost certainly also on his way to work, because we live together and work quite near each other. The reason we weren't walking in together was that he spent last night at his girlfriends. He does that sometimes. It'd be nice to be envious here, because I'm not getting any, but I find it hard to be envious of Chris. Anyway, he has a girlfriend. Which at this point, is one of the best things ever to happen to me, because he is walking with a girl who is absolutely stunning and quite clearly not his girlfriend. Seriously, guys, this girl is gorgeous. And she looks like she probably has a good personality. I have no reason for assuming this, obviously, but she definitely does. Probably reads books. I do too, actually. Books are great. Love 'em.

You alright, says Chris, a casual greeting. I nod back while trying not to stare at his companion. I fail, because she's a very pretty young lady. She noticed, by the way. So did Chris. I reckon the kids playing footie a couple of hundred yards away noticed too.

Chris tells me that he's late for work and has to hurry. This is a blatant lie, because he starts at the same time as me and I'm not late. Also I know he really didn't care if he was late. Not that he didn't like his job, he's just got one of those attitudes. Like nothing bothers him.

So, Chris is late and has to hurry. Which is a lie. Which must mean he's about to ask me to keep his friend company. Which he does. Hell yes, I think. You even have to ask? He's trying to set me up with this girl. I'd be offended, but, well, I really need to be set up.

I then pretend I'm in a hurry, and even go to the trouble of looking at my watch. Then I reluctantly agree. She's my girlfriend's cousin, he says. Staying a coupla days in the big city. I make some stupid comment about this, something about tourists that I cant even remember now. It's a painfully unfunny comment. But she laughs. Probably a pity laugh. At this point I was sure this was going to be the most uncomfortable walk of my life. Chris probably knew this too, which is why he jogged off. He'd keep it up until he was out of sight and then duck behind a tree for a smoke. I hate Chris.

So I started on the small talk. Casual stuff, friends, family, where from, what you do, that sort of thing. We chatted for a bit as we strolled along. It's a -really- big park, you know? Huge. We've got a long way to go. And the sun is out. No-one likes to walk too fast in the sun.

And as we're chatting, I realise it's not actually any effort at all. Really, it's not. Have you ever met a girl and just clicked? Nah, me neither. But I've heard about it. This wasn't the 'just clicked' thing, because that's a myth. You don't see a girl, she sees you, and you both say, Hey! You're the one for me! Sex and marriage? Awesome, let's do it. It doesn't work like that, obviously.

But we were getting along. I liked that. She was smiling at me, and I was trying to keep my eyes on the path ahead but they kept on flicking across to look at her. All on their own, I swear. I don't control them.

Favourite bands? Check. Films? Awesome, she hates that new one too. Gigs she's been too. Hey, we were both at that U2 gig last month. That's great. Ever seen High Fidelity, when Cusack says "Call me shallow, these things matter?" Never before have I been convinced of this so much. This girl is great.

We get to the end of the path. By this point I had courage to do it. I was going to ask her out. And I did. Just like that. I was kinda proud of myself.

What to know what happened? I don't really care, I'm going to tell you anyway. We had a great date, and now we're living together, and engaged.

Not really.

Turns out she was married. You'd think I'd look at the hand, right? I never saw her again. Turns out Chris was actually late. So was I, for that matter. Never mind, eh? Worse things can happen. Look at the guy who drowned in the lake.