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Christian groups have once again been left disappointed after a spokesman for Jesus Christ confirmed that he's further postponing the Second Coming.
The news comes hot on the heels of Microsoft's official announcement of the Xbox 360, rumoured for release in the USA in November. The 360 is a far better looking machine than the original Xbox, but it's not the aesthetics that are thought to be the problem. It's one of the games - Perfect Dark.
"I know the people have been waiting for him, but J.C.'s been waiting for this game a helluva long time, " said Gabriel, speaking for the Son of God, "and the official announcement of the Xbox 360 brings its release significantly closer. Maybe when he's finished with that he'll be ready to bring salvation to the world."
Jesus could well be disappointed though, if the history of this long awaited sequel is anything to go by. The original game (which scored a whopping 9.8 at IGN) was released in 2000, and ever since the sequel has thought to be in touching distance. Initial rumours claimed that a swift second game in the series would even appear on the Nintendo 64, but as interest in the console plummeted it was thought that the game would be moved to Nintendo's N64 successor, the Gamecube. However, changes were afoot in Rare, the developers of the game, when Microsoft bought the company as an exclusive second party developer for the Xbox. Given that this was early in the life of the console it was assumed that the follow up to Perfect Dark would appear on it at some point in its life.
Another Angel, who asked not to be named, spoke of the strain this game has but on the father-son relationship; "Jesus had been going to see God everyday, begging him to use his omnipotence to leak details of the game to him. Trouble is God's a Ninty and still bitter about Rare jumping ship, so he wouldn't say a word."
Apparently Jesus was sweating bucket-loads of holy water when the name 'Perfect Dark Zero' was announced, but then it all went quiet again and JC was forced to bathe in his disappointment. The prospect of the game on the 360 though, will no doubt have him creaming in his pants (or loose-fitting robes). He, like all of us, will be keeping a close eye on next week's E3, hoping, no, praying to finally see something solid about this game.
The news comes hot on the heels of Microsoft's official announcement of the Xbox 360, rumoured for release in the USA in November. The 360 is a far better looking machine than the original Xbox, but it's not the aesthetics that are thought to be the problem. It's one of the games - Perfect Dark.
"I know the people have been waiting for him, but J.C.'s been waiting for this game a helluva long time, " said Gabriel, speaking for the Son of God, "and the official announcement of the Xbox 360 brings its release significantly closer. Maybe when he's finished with that he'll be ready to bring salvation to the world."
Jesus could well be disappointed though, if the history of this long awaited sequel is anything to go by. The original game (which scored a whopping 9.8 at IGN) was released in 2000, and ever since the sequel has thought to be in touching distance. Initial rumours claimed that a swift second game in the series would even appear on the Nintendo 64, but as interest in the console plummeted it was thought that the game would be moved to Nintendo's N64 successor, the Gamecube. However, changes were afoot in Rare, the developers of the game, when Microsoft bought the company as an exclusive second party developer for the Xbox. Given that this was early in the life of the console it was assumed that the follow up to Perfect Dark would appear on it at some point in its life.
Another Angel, who asked not to be named, spoke of the strain this game has but on the father-son relationship; "Jesus had been going to see God everyday, begging him to use his omnipotence to leak details of the game to him. Trouble is God's a Ninty and still bitter about Rare jumping ship, so he wouldn't say a word."
Apparently Jesus was sweating bucket-loads of holy water when the name 'Perfect Dark Zero' was announced, but then it all went quiet again and JC was forced to bathe in his disappointment. The prospect of the game on the 360 though, will no doubt have him creaming in his pants (or loose-fitting robes). He, like all of us, will be keeping a close eye on next week's E3, hoping, no, praying to finally see something solid about this game.
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Timmargh wrote:
> Pretty good.
>
> And the missus' niece says "pasghetti" too. She's 5.
So does Vin Diesel. Allegedly.
> Pretty good.
>
> And the missus' niece says "pasghetti" too. She's 5.
So does Vin Diesel. Allegedly.
Judas works for N-gage.
Pretty good.
And the missus' niece says "pasghetti" too. She's 5.
And the missus' niece says "pasghetti" too. She's 5.
Lol! You've still got it.
Christian groups have once again been left disappointed after a spokesman for Jesus Christ confirmed that he's further postponing the Second Coming.
The news comes hot on the heels of Microsoft's official announcement of the Xbox 360, rumoured for release in the USA in November. The 360 is a far better looking machine than the original Xbox, but it's not the aesthetics that are thought to be the problem. It's one of the games - Perfect Dark.
"I know the people have been waiting for him, but J.C.'s been waiting for this game a helluva long time, " said Gabriel, speaking for the Son of God, "and the official announcement of the Xbox 360 brings its release significantly closer. Maybe when he's finished with that he'll be ready to bring salvation to the world."
Jesus could well be disappointed though, if the history of this long awaited sequel is anything to go by. The original game (which scored a whopping 9.8 at IGN) was released in 2000, and ever since the sequel has thought to be in touching distance. Initial rumours claimed that a swift second game in the series would even appear on the Nintendo 64, but as interest in the console plummeted it was thought that the game would be moved to Nintendo's N64 successor, the Gamecube. However, changes were afoot in Rare, the developers of the game, when Microsoft bought the company as an exclusive second party developer for the Xbox. Given that this was early in the life of the console it was assumed that the follow up to Perfect Dark would appear on it at some point in its life.
Another Angel, who asked not to be named, spoke of the strain this game has but on the father-son relationship; "Jesus had been going to see God everyday, begging him to use his omnipotence to leak details of the game to him. Trouble is God's a Ninty and still bitter about Rare jumping ship, so he wouldn't say a word."
Apparently Jesus was sweating bucket-loads of holy water when the name 'Perfect Dark Zero' was announced, but then it all went quiet again and JC was forced to bathe in his disappointment. The prospect of the game on the 360 though, will no doubt have him creaming in his pants (or loose-fitting robes). He, like all of us, will be keeping a close eye on next week's E3, hoping, no, praying to finally see something solid about this game.
The news comes hot on the heels of Microsoft's official announcement of the Xbox 360, rumoured for release in the USA in November. The 360 is a far better looking machine than the original Xbox, but it's not the aesthetics that are thought to be the problem. It's one of the games - Perfect Dark.
"I know the people have been waiting for him, but J.C.'s been waiting for this game a helluva long time, " said Gabriel, speaking for the Son of God, "and the official announcement of the Xbox 360 brings its release significantly closer. Maybe when he's finished with that he'll be ready to bring salvation to the world."
Jesus could well be disappointed though, if the history of this long awaited sequel is anything to go by. The original game (which scored a whopping 9.8 at IGN) was released in 2000, and ever since the sequel has thought to be in touching distance. Initial rumours claimed that a swift second game in the series would even appear on the Nintendo 64, but as interest in the console plummeted it was thought that the game would be moved to Nintendo's N64 successor, the Gamecube. However, changes were afoot in Rare, the developers of the game, when Microsoft bought the company as an exclusive second party developer for the Xbox. Given that this was early in the life of the console it was assumed that the follow up to Perfect Dark would appear on it at some point in its life.
Another Angel, who asked not to be named, spoke of the strain this game has but on the father-son relationship; "Jesus had been going to see God everyday, begging him to use his omnipotence to leak details of the game to him. Trouble is God's a Ninty and still bitter about Rare jumping ship, so he wouldn't say a word."
Apparently Jesus was sweating bucket-loads of holy water when the name 'Perfect Dark Zero' was announced, but then it all went quiet again and JC was forced to bathe in his disappointment. The prospect of the game on the 360 though, will no doubt have him creaming in his pants (or loose-fitting robes). He, like all of us, will be keeping a close eye on next week's E3, hoping, no, praying to finally see something solid about this game.
Page: