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"Covered in Cranberry and Pillowcases"

I've spent my afternoon covered in cranberry sauce and pillowcases.

I fashioned the pillowcases into a toga-like contraption and smeared cranberry over myself. It was mostly for my media production, but also because I have a cranberry and pillowcase fetish. Two birds with one stone.

Cha-ching.

I've also worked out an excellent way to pose as a charity and scam money in the name of providing sunglasses for the blind.

I'm also sick of middle class people posing as 'chavs' (translation: Neds - for the Scots) to gain the sponsorship of sports clothing firms, only to sell on the goods in their online retail stores. I find the whole business offensive.

I have recently discovered that my dentish is a fat paedophile, and that drumkits on eBay cost more in postage than for the actual item.

It was ginormous to fit around my flabby pale torso.

Must be a big pillow case.

I've spent my afternoon covered in cranberry sauce and pillowcases.

I fashioned the pillowcases into a toga-like contraption and smeared cranberry over myself. It was mostly for my media production, but also because I have a cranberry and pillowcase fetish. Two birds with one stone.

Cha-ching.

I've also worked out an excellent way to pose as a charity and scam money in the name of providing sunglasses for the blind.

I'm also sick of middle class people posing as 'chavs' (translation: Neds - for the Scots) to gain the sponsorship of sports clothing firms, only to sell on the goods in their online retail stores. I find the whole business offensive.

I have recently discovered that my dentish is a fat paedophile, and that drumkits on eBay cost more in postage than for the actual item.