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My fellow friends! How are you? Did that scab clear up? Was it a scab? Excellent. I just wanted to let you know that my filmy review website, conveniently located at the natty address of http://www.theshiznit.co.uk/home.php (proles can [URL]http://www.theshiznit.co.uk/home.php[/URL]) is nearing the final straight, is shaping up to hit a home run, and is struggling to come up with more metaphors which mean that it's nearly finished. Ignore the crap on the front page at the moment, and there's still more changes to be made, but it's just about done. Read the articles if you like. Or not, whatever.
How does this concern you and your scab? Well, even though my mad writing skillz are enough to maker David Gibbon's eyes explode and his head implode, I need your help. See, I like going to the cinema, and I like buying DVDs, but even so, I never watch all the films I really wanna see. And if I want this site to a be genuine hub (God, I can't believe I just honestly used the word 'hub' in a sentence) then I want it to be a pretty complete affair. So this means I want you to write reviews for me, and if they're good enough, I'll stick em up and literally 9 people might read them. 14 people, if the site gets popular (by then I'll have got bored and will have probably started to skateboard again).
Think you've got what it takes to survive in the choppy waters of pretend movie journalism? Can you spell 'cinematography'? Do you know what it means? Really? Could you tell me? Drop me an email and do so, and hey, maybe attach one of your amazing movie reviews so I can have a goosey and laugh at your fat-handed word guzzle.
E-mail address is reviews at theshiznit dot co dot uk
In all seriousness boys, girls and the scab-infested, I want this site to be a nice little success, even if I'm not pinning my entire life's hopes and dreams on it (well, maybe a little bit) so if anyone's up for a little bit of writing on the side with the tiniest possibility of having other people read it, then go for your guns and send me an email. I can't guarantee I'll use it, but I will read it and reply. Judging from the writing capabilities of most of the people on these forums, I'll be using a fair few. And you don't have to have Stephen Fry levels of wit (or even have to be gay), just able to know what you like and have the ability to not sound like a snivelling little Paul Ross, writing what the other mags told you to say. Paul Ross can eat his whole head.
Hope to hear from you soon, don't hesitate to get in touch, muchachos.
How does this concern you and your scab? Well, even though my mad writing skillz are enough to maker David Gibbon's eyes explode and his head implode, I need your help. See, I like going to the cinema, and I like buying DVDs, but even so, I never watch all the films I really wanna see. And if I want this site to a be genuine hub (God, I can't believe I just honestly used the word 'hub' in a sentence) then I want it to be a pretty complete affair. So this means I want you to write reviews for me, and if they're good enough, I'll stick em up and literally 9 people might read them. 14 people, if the site gets popular (by then I'll have got bored and will have probably started to skateboard again).
Think you've got what it takes to survive in the choppy waters of pretend movie journalism? Can you spell 'cinematography'? Do you know what it means? Really? Could you tell me? Drop me an email and do so, and hey, maybe attach one of your amazing movie reviews so I can have a goosey and laugh at your fat-handed word guzzle.
E-mail address is reviews at theshiznit dot co dot uk
In all seriousness boys, girls and the scab-infested, I want this site to be a nice little success, even if I'm not pinning my entire life's hopes and dreams on it (well, maybe a little bit) so if anyone's up for a little bit of writing on the side with the tiniest possibility of having other people read it, then go for your guns and send me an email. I can't guarantee I'll use it, but I will read it and reply. Judging from the writing capabilities of most of the people on these forums, I'll be using a fair few. And you don't have to have Stephen Fry levels of wit (or even have to be gay), just able to know what you like and have the ability to not sound like a snivelling little Paul Ross, writing what the other mags told you to say. Paul Ross can eat his whole head.
Hope to hear from you soon, don't hesitate to get in touch, muchachos.
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Great site.
I applaud whoever wrote that review of The Ring.
Email sir and we'll discuss the reviewing.
I'm still game for "Film I haven't watched this week"
**edit**
And don't steal reviews of Seagal movies from aint-it-cool.
I'm still game for "Film I haven't watched this week"
**edit**
And don't steal reviews of Seagal movies from aint-it-cool.
unknown kernel wrote:
> Nice looking site. If I can summon up enough anger I might write a
> review of Closer, and then one of Sideways to make me feel warm and
> fuzzy again.
Meant to mention you below actually, apologies. However, your hatred of Closer makes me dubious. How can you hate a film where Clive Owen asks Natalie Portman what her -snip- tastes like?
She will bend over for our viewing pleasure.
> Nice looking site. If I can summon up enough anger I might write a
> review of Closer, and then one of Sideways to make me feel warm and
> fuzzy again.
Meant to mention you below actually, apologies. However, your hatred of Closer makes me dubious. How can you hate a film where Clive Owen asks Natalie Portman what her -snip- tastes like?
She will bend over for our viewing pleasure.
capitals are saaaaad
"The Shiznit
because movies kick ass"
Ah, I see you've gone for the popular "answer the question no one asked" method of finding a slogan. And no capital letter to start the sentence either, always good for a journalism site.
because movies kick ass"
Ah, I see you've gone for the popular "answer the question no one asked" method of finding a slogan. And no capital letter to start the sentence either, always good for a journalism site.
Nice looking site. If I can summon up enough anger I might write a review of Closer, and then one of Sideways to make me feel warm and fuzzy again.
I've only ever written one decent review and that was on the untold story. Japanese horror at it's very best. By the way I suggest that you have a foreign movie type sub category :)
Front page is now kind of in order, looking more and more finished each day. A-woot. Now, just the DVD bit to scrap and start over, and it's done...
Incidentally, the people the original post was aimed at include:
Goaty
Light
Pandy
monkey_man
Grix
Borat
and anyone else who has more than half a brain. Cheers and stuff.
[URL]http://www.theshiznit.co.uk/home.php[/URL]
Incidentally, the people the original post was aimed at include:
Goaty
Light
Pandy
monkey_man
Grix
Borat
and anyone else who has more than half a brain. Cheers and stuff.
[URL]http://www.theshiznit.co.uk/home.php[/URL]
monkey_man wrote:
> I got it from Hong Kong, so nyer!
Me too.
It hasn't cleared up yet.
> I got it from Hong Kong, so nyer!
Me too.
It hasn't cleared up yet.
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